The slaughter of innocents.

[MedicalAdmin]

Last edited Wed Feb 1, 2012, 04:06 PM - Edit history (1)

My story is not short and may take a few minutes to read. You will read it or you will ignore it and either way I am content. But if you should be so inclined I would appreciate your thoughts and comments especially as they pertain to solutions. That is what this board is supposed to be about, isn’t it?

You may be asking yourself why, in the whole wild world of thoughts and worthy causes that you should give this one even a moment of your precious time and that is a good question. After all, there is the Republican primaries and the many laughs those are providing us with.

Let me present you with this reason, and if you feel it is worthy then read on and I will explain at the end why it should matter to us all and not just me, although I must admit to having more than a passing interest in the subject. Here’s the thing. I am dying and I shouldn’t have to. It could have been avoided easily, but it wasn’t and the reason is the crazy patchwork quilt of health care delivery that we call private insurance.

Here’s my story.

Six years ago I was healthy, employed, happy, and in good shape. I ran 10 miles a day (half of it on stairs), had a healthy diet, saw a doctor when appropriate, and contributed to my community through volunteer work. My wife and I loved each other and we were about to finally start a family. We had finally settled down after wandering the world and finishing our masters and doctors degrees (she’s the one with the brains). We had just bought our first house (an old fixer upper well within our budget) and had started fixing it up. In addition to trying for a kid of our own we were also looking at adoption because it was a need that we felt an obligation to fulfill both in ourselves and for children in need. Life was, in short, pretty good.

Then a company vehicle, driven by an unlicensed driver, ran a stop sign and plowed into me. I had a spinal injury and a lot of pain but surgery wasn’t initially indicated contingent on PT (physical therapy) and other therapies to see if they would reduce the pain. And if it didn’t work then I would have the surgery. I was making some progress, my boss was holding my job, and I almost recovered in about 6 months. It was hard painful daily work, but I felt that I was getting my life back one screaming session at a time. Hard work was paying off again.

And then it happened again. Ironically I was driving back from another PT session when someone in a big assed pick up truck ran a stop sign and T boned my ass. This time I couldn’t feel my arms, back or legs, was in incredible pain, lost control of my bladder and bowels, and had to be hauled out of what was left of my car on a back board. I clearly remember people beeping their horns and yelling at me to “move my fucking car.” Oh, the humanity. Did I mention that I live in Michelle Bachmann’s district? Anyone surprised? As a former certified First Responder, this stunned me as much as my physical injuries. I didn’t know that such casual disregard existed.


The ambulance took me to an ER where I laid for 6 hours in my own cold urine before being seen by anyone on staff. Hmmmm. In my experience the much-ballyhooed great care in the US wasn’t so good. I was in an ER in Canada about 10 years ago for a much less serious injury and I was seen in less than an hour.

I couldn’t move. I thought I was going to die and it frightened me. And then I thought I might live and be paralyzed and that frightened me more. I think I aged about 10 years lying on that table.

Eventually I was released from the hospital with a strong recommendation for spinal surgery and either vertebral fusion and/ or disc replacement. Because of the location and complexity of this procedure, there was a 1 in 20 chance of death or total paralysis with a lesser chance of partial success. But between a choice of that or of having to live with the pain, diminished feeling and partial paralysis that I had (have) it was easy to say to the surgeon “start cutting baby. I’m feeling lucky. Daddy needs a new pair o’ shoes. Winner, winner, chicken dinner.”

Here is where the story becomes relative to the rest of you.

As you know, America’s health care is paid for by a worn out patchwork quilt of insurance companies (read: devils masquerading as thieving con men masquerading as middle men masquerading as efficiency experts). They are the “Department of No” that the mentally unhinged worry about when they moan, “keep the government out my Medicare.”

This is when the shit got bad. There were, at this point, 3 insurance companies involved in my care; two auto insurances and one health insurance (mine). The first accidents’ insurance company claimed that they weren’t responsible because my problems were the second insurance companies responsibility. The second insurance company claimed that my injuries were the first insurance companies responsibility. My health insurance said that it was a car accident so they weren’t paying either.

Understand that all of them admitted that I should be treated. They all said that I deserved treatment. But they all said it was the other companies’ problem.

My doctor wanted to help but the hospital wanted to be paid and they had 3 refusals of claim forms in hand, thus they asked for either cash or a credit card with a limit in the 6 figures. What had been “the other companies responsibility” had become my problem.

I didn’t have the money so I had to wait. 6 months later, my boss said she was very sorry to tell me that she HAD to replace me. That was pretty nice of her actually. She kept me on the books and my family covered with insurance for a full year. But I was replaced. There went my health insurance and my income and my disability insurance. I thought things were bad, but they were about to get worse.

After that I didn’t have the money to ever see a doctor much more than every other month and then every 4 months and then every 6 months and then never. The income just wasn’t there. With the loss of my income and the extra bills, my wife and I went from solidly middle class to poor. My car bloke down and I couldn’t afford to fix it so I had to walk anywhere I needed to unless my wife was around and could drive me in her car. And she took a second job out of town to help cover the bills so I walked a lot. And in the winter, in Minnesota, let me tell you, walking everywhere sucks ass.

I hired a lawyer, a very good lawyer. In fact I hired the lawyer that none of the insurance companies wanted to see in court because he is very, very good. Of the top 10 payouts in our states personal injury history, he owns 3 of them. But the insurance companies are allowed by law to stall and not respond for up to 6 months to every request made and every question asked and they do. Why? Because they can. And it isn’t their problem. It’s our problem.

Using procedural and other dodges all the insurance companies in question have pushed off any settlement now for almost 6 years. Just last week we got our first settlement offer from the first insurance company - $2000. This is an insult. Counting just lost income I’m out more than 300K. It is an invitation to sue which we are now doing. Finally the end is in sight. In about a year, we will likely get a court date.

Of course this is the part of the story where shit goes from worse to worst.

About 6 months ago I started to bleed out of my nose on a regular basis. This was accompanied by migraines. But I didn’t think much about it because; I couldn’t afford to do anything about it anyway, I already hurt, and what is one more symptom in the old shit sandwich. I figured it might just be another symptom connected to my spinal injury, or maybe just dry weather. I didn’t know and I was worried about it, but I couldn’t afford to see a doctor and I sure as shit couldn’t afford any diagnostic tests, and even if I could afford those test, how in the hell could I afford any treatments? It was a dilemma and one I decided to ignore because, well, I couldn’t do anything about it anyway.

This is the same dilemma that every man, woman and parent in this country makes if they lack coverage or have a crappy policy (that percentage is about 50% of the population and raising). This attitude may not make much sense to anyone with money in the bank or functioning insurance coverage, but remember that I had all of those things too and that coverage was denied to me. The insurance companies claim it is just a contract dispute, a minor administrative detail. To far too many of us, it is murder.

Here’s the rest of my story. The bleeding and headaches got worse. So my current boss at the clinic, where I work part time, offered to pay for an MRI. The MRI indicated a few more tests that my boss also paid for. She’s a wonderful woman. And while I’ve earned my keep, some days I feel like a charity case. These days I feel like a complete one, because I am.

The tests came back. The news was bad. Real bad. Life ending bad. Which sucks.

What pisses me off is that if I had had access to even a basic physical exam with some basic lab exams a year ago, it might likely have been diagnosed early and I wouldn’t be facing my death soon. The type of cancer I have is so treatable that it is considered non fatal if caught early enough. But it is too extensive, too pervasive to deal with now. It’s mutated. It’s spread. It’s now highly malignant.

And understand. Even if it wasn’t it doesn’t matter. Because I can’t afford treatment. If anyone want to claim that medical care is free at an ER I will just be more polite than you deserve and say “you are a low life, low information, immoral, pig ignorant, hateful suckass motherless asshat.” You can and do get basic ER care in an ER. The law is specific. Public hospitals are required to treat you just enough that you are stabilized and then they release you and bill you and then sue you if you can’t pay. And they will do NOTHING for any long term, chronic, and deadly disease like cancer. That is NOT what they are set up to do. They are called EMERGENCY ROOMS because that is all that they deal with. How fucking stupid does someone have to be not to understand that? (OK – I’ll stop ranting now, but seriously, WTF?)

In other words it didn’t have to happen and wouldn’t have if I had coverage and could have seen a doctor occasionally. In fact the original surgery would have been done and none of this story would have happened. I would be working on my house. My wife wouldn’t be working herself into an early grave. My car would work. I would be employed. And I would be a father. And I would have a future. And my family and I would grow old together.

I will die soon and the ONLY REASON is that I don’t live in a civilized country. Let that sink in for a moment.

…

Now let this sink in: I’m not alone. There are 100,000 Americans who face the same thing every year. This is an honest to god slaughter of innocents.

People dying of preventable disease in the USA every day because insurance companies decide they deserve to die. A clerical snit between my insurance companies has killed me.

In answer to some of you who may suggest that I check with the hospitals and charities and programs, and I have. The problem is that both my wife and I are self-employed so we make too much gross income (on paper) to qualify for any aid or any programs. However the net income is too little to afford much beyond the basics. And so here I sit, close to the end. My wife of 20 years will be alone. This make me so sad.

It feels strange to be so accepting of my own fate. I’m dying and I’ve spent the last few weeks calling old friends and family and reconnecting. I’ve been thinking about what I have done and accomplished in my life and except for the fact that I never had kids, I am content.

I’ve lived in Canada, the USA, and Venezuela. I have traveled to Mexico, Guatemala, Costa Rica, Columbia, Panama, Brazil, England, France, Germany, Australia, and New Zealand. I have friends all over the world. I have experienced some really cool shit in my life. I’ve worked as a rig pig, corrections officer, teacher, conductor, musician, private chef, and medical administrator. I’ve hiked glaciers and mountains, shot white water rapids, played with jazz, rock and symphonic bands, explored the Amazon, and eaten way too much ice cream.

I’ve helped set up a food co-op and a school in Guatemala, taught English as a second language to immigrants, taught composition and elocution to Chinese diplomats, worked with the sick, developed curriculum for developmentally delayed students, helped find housing and education for homeless people, donated to charities, conducted an orchestra, worked to get progressives elected (I’m a graduate of camp Wellstone – a highly worthy cause) and I make one mean roast leg of lamb.

I’ve been diving, mountain climbing, mountain biking, camping, hiking, skiing, and so many other things. I’ve had great friends and I’ve had an impact on my world. My life, although shorter than I wanted it to be and missing a few adventures, has been good. I am content except for my worry about my wife.

Someone once said that we all live the same amount of time. We are born and then we die. What happens in the middle is what counts. My life has been full. My life counted. I just wish it could have counted for a little while longer.

But that isn’t what I wanted to talk about. What I want to talk about it is why we tolerate this.

It has been estimated that about 100,000 people die in the USA a year from lack of proper care. That is more people every 2 weeks than died on 9-11. We spent about a trillion in response to that event. So why aren’t we responding to this with the same passion and strength?

More importantly, what are we going to do about it? Well, not we, but you. I won’t be around for the rest of this fight. So it’s up to all of you.

I want to ask that question to every politician, media person, lobbyist and advocate in the country; “what are we going to do about this?” But I’m out of time.

Farewell DU. This will be my last post and with the exception of answering questions on this post for the next day or so, I’m done. I probably have about another month or 2 and I’d rather spend them not worrying about the state of things. I plan on spending as much time with family and friends as possible. There are still a few books I haven’t gotten to and a few songs still un-played.

In my opinion, progressives are the last, best hope for America. Don’t give up the fight. Too many lives depend on what you do and the opinions you influence. Don’t stop taking the fight to the enemies of democracy. Don’t just stay on DU. This place is a store-house of knowledge and help and vision. Use that. Then go out into the world and make a difference. And then get up tomorrow and do it again. Be the difference you want to see in the world.

In closing I would like to apologize for every mean word, turn of phrase, misunderstanding, or slight that I have delivered to anyone here. I wanted to be a better person and I failed in that, so I hope you will forgive me. My mom used to say that those who were the hardest to love probably needed love the most. Be good to each other and respect and honor our differences, as they are our greatest strength. Thank you, DU, for giving me a home these past few years.

Good luck everyone. May your road home be filled with sunshine, gentle slopes, green grass and many a glass of fine beer on warm summer nights.




on edit - the title of the essay does NOT refer to me. I could be called many things, but innocent isnt one of them.

[WingDinger]

1. The reason we tolerate this is, human nature.

Bad things happen to others. And if they do, it is likely something they did, that caused it, or they pissed God off. It is the flip side of so many believing that God wants them to win the lottery.

Add to that, those doing well, think they deserve to do lots better. And if it is them or you, YOU LOSE.

I too am in your boat, but havent been given the word yet on when is the end. Likely cuz I cant afford checkups either.

Know that your journey will eclipse this one. Even if it is no more than a wisp of everything that is. The lessons you learned, make you a far better person than one that got what you expected to come.

Also, know there is a whole world fillled with decent people that will lose till they are dead.

Being dependent on others, is the lesson noone wants, but teaches more than any other. This would be a far better world, if everyone experienced this with a loved one. But, it didnt seem to teach Santorum anything.

Go in peace. You are beautiful.

[MedicalAdmin]

2. Thank you.

I think you make some very good points, but I also think that this is something that can be turned around and corrected. The tide is turning. We all need to get out our spoons and start bailing. If we all get busy moving our little bit of the water, then eventually we can correct the course of the ship of state.

My thoughts go with you as well. Good luck. As for me, as I said, I am content.

[bvar22]

26. I disagree. This is NOT simply "Human Nature".

If it were "Human Nature", then it would apply across the whole Human Spectrum,
and it doesn't.
In ANY other Civilized Country, and in many 3rd World countries,
this situation does NOT occur.
It IS Unique to the USA among developed countries.

[WingDinger]

28. There is a difference between why this happens, and why we tolerate it.

[MedicalAdmin]

43. Good point Bvar22.

As always you have cut to the heart of the matter.

[anneboleyn]

124. I agree. This country has the most punitive, cruel attitude concerning the ill and illness.

I never knew myself until I was exposed to it directly. Everything in the OP's post has truth in it. Americans for the most part (excluding the few) are not compassionate or even wise about illness and its real effects (expense, time and suffering, lack of care, lack of help) on individuals, families, and communities.

[catbyte]

3. Wow

This country is barbaric. I'll keep you in my thoughts and will continue fighting for Single Payer.

Take care,

Diane
Anishinaabe in MI

[MedicalAdmin]

6. Thank you Diane.

I have always enjoyed your fire and passion, even when I've disagreed with you of a few subjects. This issue is in good hands.

[MineralMan]

4. I wish there was something I could say that would help.

I'll keep you in my thoughts.

[MedicalAdmin]

7. MM - I'm actually pretty cool with things now.

2 months ago I was seriously deranged about this, but I'm better now. Just promise to keep pushing for the right things and all will be well.

Love your posts.

[LiberalLoner]

5. I'm so sorry.

I don't know what to say except that, and I'm crying.

I had a white light dream/vision once. I know where you are going is so much better than this earth that you won't hardly even believe it. Pure love, joy, safety, happiness.

I will see you there when it's my time to go.

I've seen your posts here and have always liked and admired you. I am so sorry for how our nation is.

[MedicalAdmin]

8. Thanks for your kind words.

Finish your cry and then get mad and then get busy.

My dream is that what is happening to me doesn't happen to anyone else ever again. It's gonna take a fight, but I know that all y'all are up to it.

Thanks for your prediction. I guess I'll find out. If you're right I'll save you a beer or the local equivalent. (question: can heaven actually be heavenly if beer isn't there?)

[pacalo]

66. LiberalLoner described that white light the way my mom did

when she almost died after a chemo treatment eleven years ago. My mom said after experiencing it, she'll never be afraid of dying again. That was comforting to hear.

[ashling]

9. I don't know what to say, except to say: every word is true and

I am so sad that this has happened to you and your family.

[MedicalAdmin]

10. I'm pretty bummed about my family.

My birth family gets to bury their youngest child. My wife gets to bury her husband. My friends get to say goodbye.

On the other hand, there is a settlement coming eventually (after I'm gone), but my lawyer says that he should be able to get a good settlement out of the bastards (all of them) for my wife and he will push to have the insurance companies pick up all legal expenses so my wife will get the total settlements free and clear. I'm hoping that this cushion will allow her some measure of security and sanity in what is going to be a very difficult time. Luckily she has many good friends who are already circling the wagons for her. She's in good hands.

I worry about my dad tho'. He's not good with death and is still mourning my mom's passing.

... Life, as they say, goes on. Make this one count.

[Odin2005]

57. I hope your lawyer bankrupts those goddamn bastards!!!

[MedicalAdmin]

82. I don't go that far although I respect the feeling.

I hope that it will be enough to buy my wife her freedom and give her the space and time she will need to go on living with joy.

[barbtries]

116. i hope your lawyer

makes it a wrongful death lawsuit if nothing has come through by the time you pass on MA. you're clearly too young to die and those callous motherfuckers ... okay i'll be pissed for you. YOU definitely do not need to be expending any energy in a negative way. peace.

[DLevine]

11. I am so sorry

My heart goes out to you. There is no excuse for this to happen in what should be a civilized country.

[MedicalAdmin]

14. As Ghandi said when asked what he thought of western civilization....

... " I think it would be a good idea."


Bwahahahahaha.

[PA Democrat]

12. I'm so sorry. What a disgrace that a story like yours is possible

here in the "richest" country in the world. We aren't very "rich" when we allow corporate profits to take priority over the life of a friend, a neighbor, a loved one. It is a moral disgrace. Sometimes it gets so discouraging that a lot us think, why bother? I guess as long as there are stories like yours, the rest of us have to contnue to fight the good fight, to try to make people see what is happening all around them.

Surround yourself with the people you love the most, the things that bring you the most joy.

I wish you comforting words, gentle hands, peace and love, MedicalAdmin.

[MedicalAdmin]

15. Thank you.

Don't give up hope. As long as we keep our hope, then the future is assured. We can win this if we get ready to stay in for the long haul.

“Most people want to see immediate results from our work. At the Institute, we like to joke with each other: ‘If you’re working on something you can finish in your lifetime, you’re not asking the right questions.'" - Wes Jackson

http://www.yesmagazine.org/issues/the-yes-breakthrough-15/wes-jackson-a-perennial-revolution-in-agriculture

[renate]

13. I wish there were words....

I'm so sorry--as you so eloquently put it, a clerical snit between insurance companies is responsible for your death. It's not even that a lack of insurance made your life fall apart, which would be bad enough--you are dying because the insurance companies were refusing responsibility and pointing fingers at each other like a couple of schoolchildren. The current state of health care really, literally, is a slaughter of innocents. It is so frustrating that so many people refuse, or choose not, to see this fact.

As sad and angry as I am by what has happened to you, I'm also very touched by the way you chose to list all the way your life has been full, even though you wish it had been longer. Like yours, my thoughts are very much with your wife. The absolute randomness and unfairness of this situation is breaking my heart.

Nobody who read your story will ever forget it. In fact, I hope you will send it to your senator or representative, if you think they would have a sympathetic ear; perhaps it will affect an important vote someday.

And please, please, please keep this powerful essay somewhere safe so it can speak for you if you are gone by the time your case comes to court. Victory in court may come too late to help you, but it would be a big help to your wife. You are both in my heart.

[MedicalAdmin]

17. Thank you.

As I prepare for my next journey (be it long or short, harsh or joyous, real or imaginary) I also keep this entire community in my thoughts. DU is a gather point for progressives. Use and support each other. Perhaps it's time for us all to start thinking about political office.

It occurs to me that I have contributed to no small amount of insurance company hate. And that is appropriate, but please make sure that you don't make the mistake I made once and equate the workers at insurance companies with the companies themselves. They are as much victims of the system as any of us. We need to reach out to them too. They are also one of us.




On edit. It wasn't JUST a clerical snit. Cancer does have "something" to do with it, but my doctor and I strongly feel that the immoral and illegal denial of service has directly contributed to my earlier than desired demise.

[jsmirman]

16. Pretty strong argument for single payer

why is it wrong to promote the overall health of our country by allowing free access to preventative medical services? Why?

And there is nothing I can say about what you are dealing with other than express every sympathy that can be mustered.

I think this is a powerful telling of your story that people should hear when thinking Ayn Rand is anything other than a dimwhitted asshatted monster.

[MedicalAdmin]

18. You are too kind.

Really. Your post is an insult to the dimwitted asshatted monster community.

[jsmirman]

25. Ha

too true, too true.

It is remarkable that you retain your sense of humor through such a difficult ordeal. I can't know what you are going through, but I was very close to what the fight looks like, as I watched my father die last April after three years of noble perseverance against the cancer in his body. I know how admirable it is to be strong in such times, and I'd imagine we all greatly admire you.

[MedicalAdmin]

27. My mom, more than anyone, taught me how to live with dignity in the face of adversity.

Dignity is too precious a commodity to be thrown away on a whim. They can have my twisted sense of humor when they pry it from my cold dead fingers.

Stay strong and stay true to yourself.

[jsmirman]

32. I will try

I confess that in watching my father, I feared I could not possibly have the same strength - but I will try when my time comes.

[MedicalAdmin]

33. It is in struggle that we find success.

You will find your way. One way or another we all do.

[jsmirman]

70. Well, my God, enjoy yourself in every way possible

without question, you've earned it.

You will be in all of our thoughts.

[jsmirman]

71. And I think you've done one more great thing by writing this post

These are words to be passed around and carried forward. It was worth the time you devoted to it, and I know that every moment counts.

[redqueen]

19. I'm so sorry...

don't know what else to say... except we'll keep fighting.

You will be missed around here. Believe that.

[MedicalAdmin]

21. Thank you, redqueen.

I have always loved your posts on gender and feminism. You've made me smile, growl, snarl, and most importantly THINK.

I'll miss being here.

[redqueen]

22. This is a big, giant hug.

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((MedicalAdmin))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

A really, really long one that you kinda want to break free of but you feel kinda guilty so you let the person hug you anyway and feel kinda good about that. I hope.


And another one just because.

[The Doctor.]

20. No Fears. I'm in this fight.

You've earned a good rest. I'll miss you around here, but I'll be catching up soon enough. I just hope I have enough time left to take a real stab at the worst in humanity that is threatening this nation even now.

You'll be missed very much. Relax, love, smile, and godspeed.

[MedicalAdmin]

23. If the doctor is in this fight .. then there is hope.

Go Time Lord, GO.

[The Doctor.]

30. Check PMs.

Okay, I know that looks a little like 'PMS', but I try to avoid using an apostrophe where it might indicate a possessive rather than a plural.

Cheers!

[Cleita]

24. And you were insured.

I am so sorry that our "best health care system in the world" couldn't do for you what you needed done. I have spent half a lifetime trying to get them out of health care. I am now of the opinion that we don't need insurance at all for anything. They are a diabolical industry concocted in Hell as far as I'm concerned. We should have disaster funds where everyone contributes and everyone takes when they need it and, of course, we should have Medicare for All to cover all health needs for everyone.

God speed and I hope you will be well and quite honestly there is no reason why we can't hope for a miracle for you.

[MedicalAdmin]

29. I think we do need insurance.

We just need a rational system of it. Medicare, for example, is insurance. So is tricare. Both are pretty good at the basics. And it's what we all deserve to have as citizens of the richest country on the planet.

Keep demanding. Keep talking. Keep fighting. And for Dogs' sake, keep smiling.

ANd if someone throws me a hail mary pass, I'm ready to catch it. I'm resigned, but I'm also still in this fight. Thanks for the encouraging words.

[Cleita]

37. I really don't consider Medicare or Tricare insurance. They are health plans that everyone partakes

in and that most pay into. I still hate insurance in all its evil permutations and think we need something different. But that's just me and we can disagree.

[MedicalAdmin]

44. Nonetheless, they are insurance.

They are just insurance done correctly - or at least more correctly.

Insurance is, at it's base, shared risk. And that is what the medicare and tricare programs are. Everyone who qualifies participates and everyone who participates benefits when they need to. And not everyone needs to at once or even at all and that is why it works.

I'm holding out for single payer. Think it'll happen, er, soon.

[Cleita]

52. It could have happened in California and four Democrats blew it by not voting for it.

All it needed was two votes in the Senate and the Governors signature, but they couldn't get those two votes from four Democrats. It can't be reintroduced until 2013 now.

[MedicalAdmin]

55. That suck, doesn't it?

It was very bad news. However now is the time to press the advantage and push hard. If the politicians who did this have to live in fear of their careers from now on, then come the next vote they will more likely do the right thing. The one thing most politicians fear is actually having to work and answer their constituent.

Good luck.

[WingDinger]

36. Correction, refused to do what it is mandated to do.

[Starry Messenger]

31. ((hugs))

It's been an honor to have met you, MA. Peace and hugs to you and your family.

[MedicalAdmin]

45. And to yours.

[freedom fighter jh]

34. And may your last days too, Medical Admin,

be filled with sunshine, gentle slopes, green grass and many a glass of fine beer on warm summer nights.

I wish I had done in my life 1/10 of what you have done in yours.

[MedicalAdmin]

46. I've been very fortunate.

I was lucky for most of my life.

Don't say no too often and take advantage of every opportunity that comes your way. I hope you find time to live out some of your dreams like I did.

[Brickbat]

35. You're in my thoughts. In the meantime, send this to the Minnesota delegation.

[MedicalAdmin]

47. Feel free to forward it.

I'm not sure, at this point, that I want to do anything else besides spend time with my family and friends.

But if you feel it would do good, then please PM me an address and I'll send it on.

[dana_b]

38. we will keep up the fight

and will also keep you and your wife in our thoughts.

[kickysnana]

42. +1

[Earth_First]

39. I have no words for what I have just read...

[MedicalAdmin]

48. Your tag line says it all.

Think globally. Act locally. --- it's a good philosophy.


You are the future. We all are.

[Zebedeo]

40. What a well written essay

I am very sorry for everything you have gone through. May God bless you and your family.

[MedicalAdmin]

53. Thanks.

I'm a pseudo athiest, so I have no idea what happens, you know, after, but should I meet God (or not, or whatever) then I put in a good word. Or not....

Hmmmmm. Crap. Now I'm thinking about this.... perhaps a beer would help....

[bawieland]

41. Heartbreak

The story of your life breaks my heart. It is so unjust, so wrong - yet ultimately, so very believable. The way we treat people in our country who are vulnerable is criminal. There is no excuse for it. Worse, there is no reason for it - we have the means to make sure each one of us has access to the basic needs of life, but we as a society have put our priorities elsewhere.

From your writing, I gather you know this, but I feel it still needs saying: You are every bit as worthy of a good life as any of us. You have done great things, helped so many, seen and done so much. Your life has touched so many others, and that is something that will endure no matter what. I know it must be easy to feel beat down because of all that's been done to you, but you didn't deserve any of that. You were cheated. And I am so angry on your behalf.

Please know that I am fighting. I'm doing all I know to do. And stories like yours are why. People like you are why.

[MedicalAdmin]

50. Thank you for your dedication and passion.

But please don't let your anger control you or dominate you. If you must feel anger on my behalf, don't let it turn inward. Always keep it focused outward to those who deserve it.

If I may suggest, those who work for these companies feel as trapped by the system as we do. Be kind to them as they are your brothers and sisters. Reserve your antipathy for those who are truly in control. And then at the end of the day keep hope alive in your life. I still do (OK - so I still wallow in pity every tuesday afternoon between 1:16 and 2:03 - so sue me).

"The people are not your enemy, the system is."

[bawieland]

79. Yes

I totally agree. It's not the people who just scrape to get by that I'm angry with. It's those who profit most from the hardship and suffering of everyone around them. I try to remember that a lot of people who try to shout us down are actually in the same boat we are, and we're actually fighting on their behalf. They just don't see it. Yet.

And I am hopeful. Because the alternative is too horrible to accept.

[Capn Sunshine]

49. My heart goes out to you

I hate to politicize this very personal ordeal and as God is my witness I wish things were different for you. This is just such a statement of what we are fighting for - a little equality would have gone a long way in your case. I would like your permission to use this letter in a political venue. I want the President to read this. I'm pretty sure I can get it to him.

Drop me a line via DU mail.

God Bless.

[MedicalAdmin]

51. Permission granted. I hope it helps: it's why I wrote it.

After tomorrow I'm going to be officially signing off of DU to focus on enjoying life for a while. Do with my modest essay whatever you want. I give complete and total permission for anyone to use my essay in any way they would like.

[Capn Sunshine]

54. I need some contact info

PM Me

[MedicalAdmin]

133. My wife has asked me to keep my identity, for the moment, sub rosa.

And I will honor that. She may, at some time in the future, decide otherwise. But in either case I will leave that decision up to her.

[BlancheSplanchnik]

84. I am speechless, as I usually am in response to something like this.

I wish I had the eloquence of many who've posted here. Please know I do, I just can't put it into words too well.

BUT I AM glad to see that CapnSunshine can help your story be seen by the President. This is the one good for everyone that could possibly come from this.

Perhaps you even agreed, in some prior Time, to make your appearance at this time, in this nation which sorely needs a smack in the face, so that you could contribute to pushing the system to change? Perhaps?

This is your victory....
I hope your loved ones find the strength and support in love and friends that they will need.


nam myoho renge kyo
nam myoho renge kyo
nam myoho renge kyo

[Odin2005]

56. My God, In Minnesota of all places!!! :-(

I'm lucky that I qualify for Minnesota Medical Assistance because of my Asperger's. I think all Americans deserve the coverage I get.

[MedicalAdmin]

134. There was a time when MN could have been considered populist and progressive.

That time is long, long past.

Thank you for being the voice of asbergers. I have learned much reading your posts.

[Odin2005]

170. The populist spirit is still here.

The problem is really more mundane, the Independence Party usually steals more votes from DFL candidates than it does from the GOP candidates, and so the Pukes tend to win elections because of that. The 2010 gubernatorial race was an exception because the IP nominated a conservative (Tom Horner) who mostly stole votes from Tom Emmer. We need to neutralize the IP if we want to keep the Pukes out of power in Minnesota.

[MedicalAdmin]

175. If you want to neutralize the IP, then you need to help radicalize them to the right.

That way they become a pain in the ass of the GOP.

[mrs_p]

58. So much grace in the light of your suffering

I am so sorry for you and your family. This is heart-breaking. I'm sending as much positive energy your way as I can muster up. Peace and Love...

[MedicalAdmin]

135. Thank you for that generous offer.

But I believe that your energy should go to those who are still in this fight. There is no lack of them to choose from.

[Sheepshank]

59. What an emotional read....and what tragedy

I am heartbroken over every word I read. I am dismayed, disappointed and gobsmacked at what I have heard about in theory so many times, is now a reality for someone I "know".

How anyone could read this and not think there is something seriously wrong with the US healthcare and insurance system....how could they? But they will and they will justify, until it happens to them, or their mom or child...then it will be too late...again.

Despite those that fight and rail against liberal bleeding heart, socialst programs the fight will go on and forward.

[hlthe2b]

60. Thank you for sharing your story. I can only hope through your tragedy

that there is at least one among us (hopefully many more) who will take the baton and run with it. We simply can not let this happen to more people. That must be your legacy. May you find peace with your family and friends knowing that you've done good--just by sharing your story.

I can only say that you deserved so much better. And, I am very sorry.

[MedicalAdmin]

136. We all deserve better.

The problem with taking these situations on a case by case basis is that it allows the enemy to frame the problem as a once in a life time tragedy, must like they do with so called "rogue" actions of disturbed individuals.

This is all of our problem. If you are alive and have people that you love in your life then THAT is who you are fighting for.

[KatyaR]

61. I'm so very, very sorry, MedicalAdmin.

I'm so tired of seeing people who deserve the best in life dying needlessly because we won't take care of our own.

Peace be to you and your wife.

PS--your wife should send a copy of this post to the President, every freaking person in Congress, and all of the Supreme Court. Also the NY Times, Washington Post, NPR, and the BBC. Your story deserves to be told.

[MedicalAdmin]

137. If my wife chooses to share this story, then she will.

But that will be her decision.

[eridani]

62. Don't mourn--organize!

Well, I'm mourning the loss of your life. Thank you for all you have done for people in your life. Those who want to do something in honor of MedicalAdmin, check out--

http://www.pnhp.org/
http://www.healthcare-now.org/

There are links to state groups working on single payer at the state level.

[MedicalAdmin]

139. Thank you for those links.

We have donated to both and they are organization who are doing the right thing. I hope everyone considers sending them a buck or 2.

[riderinthestorm]

63. Aww dammit! Your story is uniquely "American" in a bad way...

... and that must change.

Thank you so much for taking even one second of your last days thinking of the rest of us. Please know that you have handed over the banner and we won't let it fall. I have no words of wisdom for you here at the end except to go in peace, hopefully wringing every last bit of joy and laughter out of life, without worrying that your life and words have made no difference. You will be missed and your inspirational leadership for health care reform for this country will live on.

(((hugs Medical Admin)))

[MedicalAdmin]

140. A most gracious statement.

Eloquent even. Have you considered writing and influencing opinion?

[pacalo]

64. I'm just incredibly sad about your situation.

Your words are so eloquent and full of wisdom. Please send this to President Obama with your real name & address, plus the names of all parties involved. It really cuts to the core & nothing provides an impact more than hearing about a personal nightmare such as yours.

I'm including you & your wife in my prayers. I hope the coming months will bring whatever comfort & inner strength you'll need in gathering a peace of mind.

As for the insurance companies involved, I believe your lawsuit will lead to your wife being taken care of financially for the rest of her life.

[denbot]

65. Thank you for your post.

Peace to you and yours.

[glinda]

67. This leaves me speechless. Love and take care......

[Angry Dragon]

76. glinda, do you live in backmann's district??

I copied and sent to Kline and I think backmann should get to read this
I would but she will not let me e-mail her

[glinda]

87. Nope. Chipped Craack's District. Blech*

[graywarrior]

68. Holy shit!

I have no words. I cannot imagine the anger, pain, and fear you are experiencing. I just got diagnosed with a chronic illness that has stopped me in my tracks, but I am not dying and, because I live in MA, I have health coverage. And that enrages me more because EVERYONE should have what I have.

I wish the hell there was something I could do for you, MedicalAdmin. I wish that more than anything tonight.

[MedicalAdmin]

141. Keep in the game Gray.

It is people just like you who will make the difference in the coming years.


You bet your life.

[graywarrior]

143. .

I'll continue to fight for you and others like you.

[EvolveOrConvolve]

69. ...

[MedicalAdmin]

142. That was lovely.

I think I'm going to program that piece for my funeral reception.

[ScreamingMeemie]

72. Nothing can be said that will make sense of this.

Know that I will hold you close in thought.
We work through these things but we never get over them.

[cbrer]

73. Does this, in any FUCKING way

Indicate the need to take our country back from greedy lying bastard capitalists?

This poor soul is, as he poignantly points out, one of hundreds of thousands facing death. The ultimate sentence. The final stare.

Health care is only one of the dysfunctional systems in our country. As the finest social experiment in the history of mankind, is this the best we can do?

[MedicalAdmin]

144. NO! It isn't the best we can do.

We can and will do better. I know that in the depths of my heart.

America will do the right thing. Just remember what Winston Churchill said, "America will always come up with the best solution for a problem possible, ... after trying every other solution first."

We'll get there. Keep the pressure on and don't give up hope.

[handmade34]

74. thank you MedicalAdmin

we will fight!!

go smile and let the breeze hug you tightly...


my husband died a few years back and I can say there is a bittersweetness to life but there is a contentedness with a life lived fully...

[MedicalAdmin]

145. Thank you for that.

My one big worry was my family. Your words have given me a measure of peace.

[unkachuck]

75. K&R....this is one shitty country we live in....n/t

[MedicalAdmin]

146. But this could be such a good country.

We just have to remind her of her potential.

[unkachuck]

171. "But this could be such a good country."

....it could be, but I doubt it will ever be....

[MedicalAdmin]

176. I've had dark days too.

Try to keep your hope alive.

[burrowowl]

77. Love to you and your family

[Kali]

78. I am so sorry this has happened to you. To anyone.

We should be so much better than this.

[undeterred]

80. Thanks for sharing your story here.

I've lost a handful of friends to a lack of insurance over the last 10 years and I am without it myself right now. You and they inspire me to keep fighting for something better for all of us.

[MedicalAdmin]

147. Private insurance is NOT the answer.

Thanks for having walked beside me on this journey to fight for health care for all.

I may not live to see the finish line, but I had a good run. Bon chance, mon ami.

[babylonsister]

81. What a fantastic post. I am so

sad you had to write it, I am jealous of the life you have lived!, and I wish you'd get this published far and wide to open some eyes and hearts, and maybe wallets? Love to you and yours.

[1620rock]

83. Godspeed on your final journey. We love you, thank you for sharing.

[RainDog]

85. Please share your story with your local news network

I wish there was more I could offer, or say. This breaks my heart because I know this is reality for many people for a variety of reasons.

hugs to you and yours. I'm so sorry you have had to live in a nation that is so hateful toward its citizens. I wish you and all of us had better governance.

[RainDog]

86. why don't you contact these people

just because - because what would you have to lose by doing so in the current situation.

maybe someone can help you.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1170201

[MedicalAdmin]

149. Alas I have a genetic anomoly and do not produce the enzyme that breaks down THC.

It is, thus, a poison for me.

Thanks for posting the link though. It might help someone and that is a good thing.

[EastTennesseeDem]

88. Wow.

After reading this I was kind of just...overwhelmed? Stunned? There really is nothing to say. I was, however, left without movement in my seat.

I'm not even out of college yet, and given my school's self-righteous, entitled populace, but mainly thanks to my age in general, I don't ever really encounter this kind of thing in real life.

I don't know you MedicalAdmin, and I am fairly aimless at this juncture, but I'm going to fight like hell. I am so very sorry about what you have gone through, but if it's any consolation, I'm going to remember this post (it really is an unforgettable one) whenever I feel like the social and political climate is too overburdening.

[sabrina 1]

89. This is so sad. I am so sorry to hear this.

I will keep hoping for a miracle

[MedicalAdmin]

150. Me too.

In the meantime, dance on, dear one.

[sabrina 1]

173. Okay!

[fizzgig]

90. love and light to you and yours

[MedicalAdmin]

151. I love, love, love that GIF.

I am smiling like a fool right now.

Joy to you.

[kimi]

91. I am continually amazed and humbled

by people - like you - who in the midst of their own tragedy, still reach out to others and urge them to be advocates for those less fortunate than themselves. I've seen it before, and it is truly inspiring. That said, I am so sorry for what's happened to you and your family. I will also keep you, your wife, your dad, and other family and friends in my thoughts and prayers.

You've certainly inspired me. I'd already decided to get involved in some kind of campaign work over the summer, before I start back to school in the fall. Don't think I'll wait till summer now, though.

Peace. And thank you.

[EastTennesseeDem]

92. Likewise.

I graduate in May, and MedicalAdmin has completely changed what I'm motivated to do and why I'm motivated to do it.

[MedicalAdmin]

152. Kimi and ETD,

I am assuming that you are both younger than me. It lightens my load to know that there are young energetic and smart people like you in this fight.

Good luck in your life and my joy and hope walk with you on your journey.

[webDude]

93. God bless you, MedicalAdmin! May your remaining days here be as long and as pleasant as you have...

...ever had!!!

[MedicalAdmin]

153. Thank you.

So far they are going better than I expected. I'm talking walks, spending lots of time with my wife, and calling friends and family when energy allows it. It hasn't been so bad.

Don't wait so long like I did. Call someone you love today and let them know.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

94. You've been a valuable member of DU, and I'll miss you

Go in peace.

[MedicalAdmin]

154. You have been a beacon in the night for me.

You are, in many ways, my jiminy cricket on DU. Best wishes to you and your family.

[Stuart G]

95. k & r Thank you for you, and for sharing this with us.

[MedicalAdmin]

155. IT was, in some ways, my pleasure.

[UnrepentantLiberal]

96. That sucks.

Evil bastards.

[myrna minx]

97. Oh my god - I don't know what to say.

to you and your wife.

[MedicalAdmin]

156. You said it so well....

... I think you knew exactly what to say.

[progressoid]

98. ...

[MedicalAdmin]

157. Thank you. I feel better already.

[eyewall]

99. you tell your story eloquently

I understand what you are saying. I know most of the people here understand what you are saying. I wish more Americans understood. I will share your words with as many as I can.

May the long time sun
shine upon you
all love surround you
and the pure light within you
guide your way on.

[lunatica]

100. Will finish reading later

I have to go to work now.

[marmar]

101. A heartfelt 'Thank You' for posting this.....

Upsetting and motivating at the same time.......Only the best to you.

[MedicalAdmin]

158. I love your quote.

Wise words. We all need a helping hand every now and again. We just have to remember to give one when it is needed.

I remember a story I once heard Jack Lemmon tell about why he donated time every summer to theater camps for young actors. The way he figured it was that life and acting had been very good, that the only reason he had opportunity when he was younger was because someone had generously given it to him and that it was his responsibility to send the elevator down to the ground floor for the next person so that they could move up too.

I always like that story.

[seabeyond]

102. we have insurance. we have money in the bank. i am so fearful of exactly what you describe. it is

such a reality.

you leave a lot for people to think about. it is disgusting as we pay out tons in insurance, to know that will not be good enough.

i am so sorry

[MedicalAdmin]

159. It is my most fervent wish...

that your insurance will work as needed when needed.

[muriel_volestrangler]

103. Good luck, MedicalAdmin

I hope you have as much pleasure as possible from the rest of you life - and may it be longer than now seems likely.

Thank you for an excellent thread showing the multiple problems of insurance and US healthcare, in such a tragic way.

[gateley]

104. K&R. nt

[hay rick]

105. Thank you for sharing your story.

I bookmarked it so I can link to it in future discussions of the subject. America's for-profit healthcare system is one of the great evils of our time and well worth fighting.

Best wishes for your remaining days, condolences to your wife, and congratulations on a life well-lived.

[SunsetDreams]

106. Wow, your story is powerful

So touching in every way. Thank you for taking the time to share your story with us, it was an honor reading it. I wish you nothing but the best in your remaining time here on this earth.

[KamaAina]

107. My dear friend Suz on insurance: "You've got peace of mind."

"Of course, if anything bad happens to you, we aren't actually going to pay you anything, but in the meantime, you've got peace of mind!"



This ought to be shared around widely, perhaps with Will Pitt at Truthout.

[MedicalAdmin]

160. Your dear friend is wise.

Insurance, like rights, are never really there, if they can be removed at a whim.

[AnneD]

108. Oh. Med Admin...

I always remember your posts with kindness. This Nurse thinks you're the greatest. I am sad beyond belief. I hope you get good Nurses. If they knew what a friend you have been to us....
Our health care may be great but the delivery sucks. If I had a nickle for every story like yours, I could pay your bills.

My step dad is just now recovering from a near fatal t-bone, but he will never drive again. We are grateful for the PT that only charged us what the InsCo would pay. He does PT for very famous sports people and he charges a mint, but thanks to his kindness dad can walk again. It is a small thing but it means mom can care for him.

Every American should has the basics and preventitive. Instead we get the Dept of No...and we pay too much for that.

Hugs and my love to you and your bride. I don't know what else to say.

[MedicalAdmin]

161. I have nothing but admiration for every nurse I have ever met.

Florence Nightengale aint' got nothing on you.

Keep telling the stories that you know Anne. There is great power in narrative.

[ceile]

109. no words

[MedicalAdmin]

110. Thanks everyone for your thoughts and wishes.

I feel good reading the comments and knowing that this issue is in good hands. I trust DU and I trust the posters here to go out and do the right thing. Day in. Day out. Without fail.

Remember that every movement needs an MLK and a Malcolm X. We all bring different strengths and weaknesses to the table. Honor those and honor each other. It's been a honor and privilege for me to be a part of this place.

Have a good life everyone.

[LiberalEsto]

111. Safe journey, MA

wherever you may travel...
and may the Goddess hold you in her loving hands

I've never been brought to tears like this by a DU post before.
Thank you, MA, for reminding us of what the 1%, the corporations and their lobbyists have done, and continue doing to the U.S.

I shared part of your post on my Facebook page, with a link to it on DU so my friends can read it too.

[geardaddy]

112. I'm so sorry MA

[backtoblue]

113. I've read some of your past posts and you've been in my thoughts ever since.

I hope you find some peace and are able to enjoy the time you have. Your story is heart-wrenching and no one should endure what you have.

Here's to you MedicalAdmin. Thank you for sharing with us.

[madamesilverspurs]

114. I'm putting this in my pocket and taking it with me

to all the healthcare discussions I'll continue to attend. You and I 'conversed' on these boards a couple of times, I do wish we could have talked over coffee. Know that I'm thinking of you, thankful for your life and your words.

[MedicalAdmin]

162. Oooooo. Coffee.

That would be nice.


Another time, perhaps?

[barbtries]

115. medicalAdmin

is there anything i can do?
is there any way we can keep up with you? miracles have been known.
clinical trials?
i feel so helpless. please take care. love, light and peace be upon you.

[MedicalAdmin]

163. Helpless is OK. Mostly because it is a transient condition. It passes.

But hang onto your hope. It is the fuel of dreams.

[TuxedoKat]

117. MA my friend

I wish there was something more I could do for you. I will definitely continue the fight. Praying for a miracle for you MA. (((HUGS)))

[Brigid]

118. This country is barbaric. Just barbaric.

What else can you call it, when tragedies like this occur routinely, and there are those in power who are OK with that? Your story should be all over every media outlet in the country. I could just hear Reverend Al, Big Ed, and Rachel now. Maybe that moron Boehner could cry over something real for a change. Farewell, MedicalAdmin.

Hail Mary, full of grace,
The Lord is with thee,
Blessed art thou among women,
And blessed is the fruit of they womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God,
Pray for us sinners,
Now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.

[MedicalAdmin]

164. Peace be unto you.

[BlueCheese]

119. What a terrible and tragic story.

What happened to you should not happen in any country as prosperous as this one.

I admire that you have found peace with your situation. Best wishes, and hopefully what seem like the final few months stretch out longer than you expect.

--------

On a more practical note, short of setting up a real national health care system, which isn't happening any time soon, what else can we do? It seems wrong that your health insurance company can deny payment even when they acknowledge you need treatment, just because they think someone else should foot the bill. Maybe a simple law requiring health insurance companies to cover their customers' treatment (I mean, isn't that what they're ostensibly for?). The company can always sue the other insurance companies later.

[MedicalAdmin]

166. We have a start with the HCR bills.

Keep pushing for improvement. You just have to believe that it can and will happen and convince others that it must.

You will get there. ANd in the meantime some progress is being made.

[lunatica]

120. Based on this OP alone I love you

I hope I have the grace you have when my time comes.

[MedicalAdmin]

167. YOu will.

It's not that hard actually. Just be who you are. And who your dog knows you to be.

[irisblue]

121. i thank you for teaching me how to die

i read some of your posts and this one has for me thaught me a lesson that i will keep close to my heart. i'm living with the love of my life, in our small house with a fur posse, all of which gives me much of the daily-day joy. i like my job and the work (the coworkers....ehhh) i am aware of and deeply greatful for those big gifts. as you say "My life has been full. My life counted." " ... go out into the world and make a difference." i will. and when/if some one asks me about this, i will credit you as a teacher and example. rest well, as you pass thru the rainbow bridge, tell alex and duke, i miss them, and i love them.

[MedicalAdmin]

168. Higher and truer praise I have never received

Thank you for that.

Be true to who you are and leave things a little better. What else can anyone expect out of life?

[OneGrassRoot]

122. You are an inspiration...

In SO MANY WAYS.

I'll be keeping you in my thoughts, and your words and message at the ready.

[flying rabbit]

123. Peace.

Last edited Fri Feb 3, 2012, 03:13 PM - Edit history (1)

[cate94]

125. There are no words to express

how sorry I am for what you are going through. You deserve better, as do all the people who suffer as a result of our broken system.

Sometimes people get miracles. I hope for one for you.

Thanks for all the good you have done.

[Tumbulu]

126. beautifully written and outrageously sad and frustrating

sending appreciation for taking the time and making the effort to write to us. I know that I need encouragement to keep up the fight for single payer.....I am so sorry that we have not gotten farther than we have.

[MedicalAdmin]

131. "We" have done just fine.

"We" just aren't finished yet.

And we must keep counting on each other; the working class.

[libodem]

127. Your story is so moving

It should not be happening in this country. We are an uncivilized nation of heartless greed. Money should not trump health.

[MedicalAdmin]

129. Money, in my mind, doesn't trump health.

But greed does.

[Delphinus]

128. Oh my god.

I am stunned. I don't know what to say --- words seem so inadequate. Hugs and saying I'll send you prayers or energy just don't cut it.

Thank you for writing your story so eloquently. May your days be filled with love and joy and may your death be as painless as possible. I hope your story is share far and wide --- I will do my part in that.

[MedicalAdmin]

132. Thank you.

No one could ask for more.

[lonestarnot]

130. Sadness.

[dembotoz]

138. k and r

[G_j]

148. wow, thanks for sharing

such a personal story. And yes indeed, there is a store-house of knowledge in DU and it's archives, you have added to that. All the very best to you fellow traveller.

[TheKentuckian]

165. All I know how to say right now is thank you for all you are and have contributed.

[MedicalAdmin]

169. This is my final post. I'm off to see the wizard and, who knows, maybe I'll beat this thing yet.

If I do, I'll be back.

But if not thank you everyone for making my stay here on DU and on planet earth, a good one. I have enjoyed the shared laughs, tragedies and arguments.

"Shared pain is lessened. Shared joy is multiplied." -Spider Robinson.

[Tsiyu]

172. Well that kicked my ass

Just found this. I wish all the musicians on DU could head over for a jam, and all the cooks come over to make a big feast.

As a person without insurance, I understand some of what you're facing.

The big stuff I cannot imagine.

Live well.

[shanti]

174. k&r

a message that needs to be shouted to the nation! peace be with you...

[mikekohr]

177. Thank you for sharing and may God Bless You

I'll keep fighting and I know there are others that because of this post will not quit either.

Mike Kohr
Bureau County Democrats, "Mike's Corner" http://bureaucountydems.blogspot.com/

[pitohui]

178. as far as pertaining to solutions

i am sorry to hear your story and don't know what to say, as far as i understood, it is much too late for you

as far as others in your situation, who don't have time to wait decades or maybe centuries, for universal health care that may never come in time for them...let me point out that it took MORE than just some insurance companies to murder this man

i have a friend who was years ago in a similar situation (serious, potentially paralyzing accident followed by cancer while workman's comp and insurance co. argued who would pay)...my friend gained his ability to walk and his cancer was placed in remission and the difference is not that the insurance or workmen's comp settled, because this is a process that takes years -- you can be insured or not insured, the insurer is not going to pay expensive claims without a fight, and often the fight takes years, because they do realize that if you die, the settlement/reward is going to be reduced (juries are not necessarily interested in helping someone who wasn't the sick/injured person get rich off the real victim's death, you know)

the difference is some of the doctors went ahead and treated him and agreed to fight about the money later (instead of making excuses and pretending the hospital could have stopped them from treating a patient) AND the lawyer, who was confident that he would eventually win the settlement, actually loaned my friend a lot of money up front, which would only be re-payable when/if he won the settlement (also my friend's lawyer realized a wife is unlikely to get the same settlement as an actual living in-pain victim who can look a jury or a judge in the eye so he did have a smart financial incentive to make the loan)

my friend still had to declare bankruptcy while awaiting a settlement...but my friend can walk and my friend will live (supposedly according to his oncologist) a normal lifespan...he even kept his house under our state's bankruptcy laws

my point is that an insurance company ALONE can't kill anyone, what kills is when the so-called professionals look you in the eye and give some excuse to refuse you help because you don't have upfront money -- the insurance company fight COULDN'T have killed if the doctors and the hospitals hadn't then said, "oh no, we're in it for the money, no money, we don't lift a finger," instead of treating the guy and then worrying about payment

in medicaladmin's case, the doctor who gave the excuses is just as much a murderer as is the insurance company, if not more so, the insurers saw a piece of paper, the doctor looked him in the eye and refused him, that's a pretty hands-on manslaughter if not legal murder -- he seems to hold no grudges but his refusal to hold grudges may make him feel better about himself and his soul, it doesn't do much to change the cruelty of these doctors who are not held to normal standards of human decency

if i see someone dying and there's something i can do to stop it, i don't put my hand out first and say, "gimme" -- why is the doctor being held to a different standard?

insurance companies, hospitals, and doctors WORK TOGETHER to create this situation where people are extorted for their life's earnings or billed for more than they have ever earned in a lifetime of work, insurance companies COULDN'T do this if hospitals and doctors didn't have unfair, too high prices and unfair billing practices

ask me upfront for the money if i'm buying a sofa, not when i'm buying my life

[sabrina 1]

179. Excellent post, thank you. And I agree, your friend was lucky to meet a doctor who understood

what his oath is all about and I am very glad he did.

There was a doctor on Long Island who quit his job at the local hospital because he could no longer watch people being turned down for treatment and in many cases left to die. He set up his own practice mostly for people without insurance and charged people what they could afford. He is from S. America and he told me that when it comes to life, there is simply no choice but to give someone the treatment they need. He is an angel. We found out about him when my SO had a life-threatening illness but no coverage, and was earning too much to get Medicaid.

There are good people in the world, I am only sad that Medical Administrator did not meet such people.

[MedicalAdmin]

181. I have met several of good doctors. .

But spinal surgery and other very expensive treatments like cancer treatments are not cheap. Even if my surgeon had wanted to donate his time or let me pay over time when I could afford it, the hospital, support staff, etc would all need to be paid. My surgeon would have helped me, but he would have had to pay 70,000 out of his own pocket to do the surgery that would have fixed my spine. That is unreasonable.

And I made too much on paper as an independent contractor to qualify for any programs that fund treatment for those who are poor. I don't actually have any money, but my gross income was too high to qualify.

I'm past being angry about this. In some cases life actually is too short. But I am sad about it and I hope that others will keep pushing single payer or some other form or rational universal coverage so this doesn't happen again.

[sabrina 1]

189. Yes, I know how that works, regarding making too much on paper. I discovered

it when someone very close to me, also working as an independent contractor with his own business, but could not afford HC, became seriously ill. He was not eligible for Medicaid. I was truly shocked as that was when I fully understood how the system works. I asked the nurse 'but what do people do'? Her response I will never forget 'they die'. She said it as if it was normal.

The only option was to stop working for three months, show earnings of less than a few hundred dollars a month and then reapply. It is shameful.

I wish, wish you could have received the care you deserved. I am heart-broken over all of this.

[MedicalAdmin]

191. Dear Sabrina.

Don't be heartbroken. I am OK with this. Best guesses are that I have somewhere between a few days to a few months left.

As my mom used to say, "doctors are just a high opinion of themselves wrapped up in a white jacket." Who knows. I haven't given up and I'm trying alternative therapies that may or may not work (I think that these lifestyle medicine areas need more research conducted by people who actually understand how to do them and not flunkies of pharma companies). But in the meantime I've had a good time reconnecting with friends and family. It's been an enriching experience in some good ways.

Keep the faith and keep your hope and joy.

Peace.

[sabrina 1]

194. I am glad to hear you have not given up.

Also happy you are enjoying connecting with friends and family.

Your mom had a point about doctors, not all of course, but I definitely have met one or two like that.

[SammyWinstonJack]

185. +1000000.

[grantcart]

180. Deeply saddened by your story and wish that I could do something.

I also worked in various countries and had doctors from various countries on our staff. Almost all of the doctors were politically conservative however none of them understood the American stance on access to health care and thought it was immoral.

There is a simple legal remedy that would solve most of the problems like yours.

let me repeat that

There is a simple legal remedy that would solve most of the problems like yours.

Recently my daughter was hit by a driver and her head hit the window sideways. She didn't appear to have a serious injury but with constant headaches the doctor felt an MRI was called for.

The other guy was clearly at fault and supported by the police report from the scene, they never contested their responsibility.

When we went to the MRI facility they would not perform the procedure with a 'lien' (meaning they would get paid first from a settlement). With two brothers who are lawyers I had a referral for an attorney in 5 minutes. He took the case. He told us that the settlement would be within $ 15,000 and $ 19,000. Six months later my daughter settled for $ 18,000 and got about $ 9,000 in her pocket.

What most people dont understand is that decades ago there used to be a law regarding 'frivolous denial of claim'.

What is a frivolous denial of a claim

Simply put it is whenever a jury decides that an insurance company has delayed making a reasonable offer withing 4 months of a claim.

If they are found guilty then all of the reasonable claims, as determined by the jury, are quadrupled as a penalty to the insurance company.

Decades ago insurance adjusters raced to get claims solved so that they wouldn't have to pay a 4X of the original cost. If the insurance company thought that they were right they would hold off and fight it in court, and the opposing attorney got nothing.

It was very self regulating.

In your instance the two insurance companies wouldn't have worried about getting hung with the cost of your care but 4 times the cost of your care. The bigger the claim the greater the pressure on the insurance companies to settle.

Also it makes it easier for doctors and clinics to take claimants on the basis of a lien because if the lawsuit is decided by the jury in favor of the plaintiff then those providing services would be paid 4 times their fee.




This doesn't require an elaborate change in the health care industry.

In fact it could be done state by state.

But the people would have to turn off the TV and give a damn and demand change.

[MedicalAdmin]

182. Currently insurance companies have ZERO incentive to rush through payment.

NONE. I know many doctors who are still waiting to get paid a pittance of a percentage for services that performed 3 years ago. How can any company run like that.

It's so fucked up.

I think your idea is a great one. Thanks for bringing it up. It's simple, time tested, and easy to implement. Which is, or course, 3 political strikes against it.

[grantcart]

183. and ironically in the insurance industry's interest

It would create a level playing field so that insurance companies could compete on efficiency of service rather than trying to game cost reduction by guessing how many folks will launch lawsuits.

It would reduce attorney's fees, and the need for advertising.

A level playing field would then allow the market to help reward the better companies and punish the bad ones.

[MedicalAdmin]

186. Have you considered that an aversion to a level playing field

... is exactly why many of the players aren't interested in it. There has to be a reason that the big players aren't interested in that law, and one reason might be that they stand to lose profit if the field is leveled and stabilized. And if that is so, then one must speculate that those who oppose a simple regulation like that ARE profiting from denying treatment to patients and payment to doctors (et.al.). They don't want a level playing field and they don't want regulations because they ARE thieves and scoundrels.

When everyone around you is acting like they are criminals, isn't it rational to suppose that they are?

[unapatriciated]

184. My heart goes out to you and yours.

Last edited Fri Feb 10, 2012, 01:37 PM - Edit history (1)

In my long struggle with my insurance company relating to my son's illness, I encountered much the same as you. Delays and denials just because they could by law. This resulted in the unnecessary crippling of my son. Many have asked why I did not pursue a lawsuit against the insurance companies involved. Short answer they can legally delay treatment and it is hard to prove that the delay and not the disease caused the crippling of my son. The Insurance Industry knows this going in and they also know that the monies they saved during their delays and denials (of many policy holders) will be greater than any fines or penalties that they may have to pay at a later date (of the few policy holders who win a lawsuit).

My outcome was better than yours and I am grateful to still have my son with us. During the most active stages of his illness we were not sure if he would survive and have been told he is very lucky to see his 30th birthday. Because of the preventable damage during the active stages (due to interruptions and denials of care) his life will be shorter than mine and that is something a parent does not want to face. So I will send positive thoughts to your father.

I have been fighting for single payor since the early 90's and will continue to do so.

Thank you for your story, I know this was probably very difficult for you to do since it meant acceptance of something that didn't need to be.

[MedicalAdmin]

187. But once I accepted it, it became very easy.

Almost like an exercise in Zen: breath and accept, breath and accept. It's been very peaceful really. Last week sucked, but I am feeling relatively frisky today so I logged back to see if there were any more posts and low and behold, here you are.

Sorry about your son. I have a hard time fathoming your grief. I missed out on being a parent, although it was in the original plan.

Please try to find joy in your life. You never know when your last day might be. Make it count.

PS - thanks for being in the fight. There were times I thought I was alone. Feel free to share my story if you think it will help.

[unapatriciated]

190. I admire you and your grace.

I wanted to let you know, that I do find joy in my life on a daily basis. I think many who have dealt with long a illness and despair learn that gem of wisdom. I learned it from my son and his will to enjoy life no matter what it throws at him. I am his biggest fan.

I would like to share your story with my son, he has had some recent setbacks that have left him questioning his reason for being. I know this will pass for him and once again I will see his joy for life.

Thank you for who you are and the love and compassion you have brought to all of us in this thread.

[MedicalAdmin]

193. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

I hope this story can help your son in some way. And I'm honored to have been a small part of your life.

Namaste.

[renie408]

188. I will fight for universal health care in your honor.

I cannot express how I feel right now. I want to tell you I love you. I want to bring you something to help you feel, somehow, a little better. I want to hug you and your wife and I want to scream and hit somebody.

Peace be with you and your family. Me and mine will fight in your memory.

[MedicalAdmin]

192. I'm honored Renie.

Truly.

Please keep up the fight but don't lose yourself in negative emotions. As I've mentioned elsewhere I am OK with this. This is my life and right now it is pretty good, all things considered. Sure there is that terminal diagnosis, and that kinda sucks, but things could change. I'm working to live and maybe I will.

I'll take the hugs though.

If you are going to fight this fight, fight it for your family and every other family that is out there. If I live then I will rejoin the fight. If I don't, then keep focused on the living. Keep the hope and joy alive in your life.

Look to the future. This is a fight we can win and then we will all benefit. Imagine a country where medical bills and worries are removed. Imagine how much positive potential will be released into the world. Now THAT dream is worth living and fighting for.

Namaste.

[MedicalAdmin]

195. This is it.

I don't think it will be long now. Things are going downhill fast.

Thank you all for being my friend over the years. For the arguments, for the laughs, for the stimulation, and for the joy you have brought into my life.

I wish you the best luck in the future, each and every one of you.

Keep hope alive in your life.

[jsmirman]

196. My God, should you or your loved ones read this

please know that you mattered.

[ScreamingMeemie]

197. I missed this post, this update... You are in my thoughts MA.

Always.

[uppityperson]

198. I missed all this and am sorry. Hoping for peace for you and yours.

[Ecumenist]

202. MA, I don't know if you;re still here but I won't you to know that I, for one, am fighting

the same beast and you will NEVER have passed from this world in vain and for no good reason. The very fact that someone so earnest and injured by not one but two accidents and then passed over like so much refuse INFURIATES ME. You have my prayers and thoughts for as long as I live. God bless you and may your family be blessed and comforted.

[Xyzse]

199. I

I regret not getting to know you. This was posted before I became active in this site.

[Evasporque]

200. I don't know you and wish you could be here with us...so i could.

Farewell....

[mahina]

201. aloha brother, peace to you and your family.

I wish I'd seen this earlier. I will work to change this system. This is a horrendous and unspeakable injustice.

ALOHA

[ScreamingMeemie]

203. You are remembered still.

[MedicalAdmin]

204. I thought you all should know that Medical Admin has passed on

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1002632763

[JNelson6563]

206. No words right now.

[Vanje]

205. K, R and Farewell, MA

[wendylaroux]

207. Love to you medicalAdmin

If only faces could be be put to the deaths of all the people who did not have access to medical care,--needless,preventable deaths.------:: -I'll not forget your story,ever. I am sorry.---

[Blue_Tires]

208. kick for truth

r.i.p.

[NC_Nurse]

209. Much love to you my friend. I hope that you send this eloquent piece to your local paper and

a few choice congress folks. But I understand if you don't. You deserve to enjoy your last time with your loved ones. I for one, completely agree with your assessment of the gross injustice that is our healthcare system. I am saddened and outraged that this is what people in this country accept as normal. The only people I know that say the cliche about "America has the greatest healthcare in the world" are either rich, on a government program (the VA, Medicare or federal govt employee), or have NEVER used it. It's a crying shame that anyone listens to this shit anymore.

I have only the best wishes for you and your family. You have lived a full and admirable life. If I was religious I'd make predictions about your great destinations in the hereafter. Let's just say, if anyone should go to heaven, you should!

[Duppers]

210. MedicalAmin passed more than a month ago. Please read his dear wife's post...

This link was also posted upthread:
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1002632763

[calimary]

212. Dayum. No words.

Except for whatever might urge America toward a different, improved, and more compassionate response. For all our sakes.

[Atticus]

211. I read every word of your post.

I cried for you---and your wife and father.

And, now, I am done with tears. I know that whatever years I have left must be spent continuing "the good fight".

I wish you peace and love.