HomeLatest ThreadsGreatest ThreadsForums & GroupsMy SubscriptionsMy Posts
DU Home » Latest Threads » Forums & Groups » Main » General Discussion (Forum) » Heres the thing....

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 06:56 PM

Heres the thing....

A friend of mine was recently asked to cook a dish for a party for someone we both know. I was asked but i declined cause I just don't like the person. So my friend decided she was going to make the dish and take it to the party. The hostess asked her to make 2 large pans of lasagne and she did. She went to the party and brought the food. Upon arrival the hostess told her she could not stay cause she was not invited. she told her she was just to bring the food. she said it is not her fault she assumed she was invited. So my friend said okay and took her two pans of lasagna back home. The hostess was livid. Who was right and who was wrong? i think my friend was right. what do you think?

36 replies, 2308 views

Reply to this thread

Back to top Alert abuse

Always highlight: 10 newest replies | Replies posted after I mark a forum
Replies to this discussion thread
Arrow 36 replies Author Time Post
Reply Heres the thing.... (Original post)
SummerSnow Aug 2013 OP
burnodo Aug 2013 #1
The Philosopher Aug 2013 #2
SummerSnow Aug 2013 #4
The Philosopher Aug 2013 #27
orpupilofnature57 Aug 2013 #33
The Philosopher Aug 2013 #35
LumosMaxima Aug 2013 #3
LeftofObama Aug 2013 #5
mucifer Aug 2013 #6
Oakenshield Aug 2013 #7
SummerSnow Aug 2013 #10
Iggo Aug 2013 #13
sufrommich Aug 2013 #21
Oakenshield Aug 2013 #26
smirkymonkey Aug 2013 #36
LumosMaxima Aug 2013 #14
boston bean Aug 2013 #8
ZombieHorde Aug 2013 #30
Rex Aug 2013 #9
ohheckyeah Aug 2013 #16
sufrommich Aug 2013 #24
aikoaiko Aug 2013 #11
jberryhill Aug 2013 #12
steve2470 Aug 2013 #15
rrneck Aug 2013 #17
xfundy Aug 2013 #18
MerryBlooms Aug 2013 #19
sufrommich Aug 2013 #20
malaise Aug 2013 #22
orpupilofnature57 Aug 2013 #23
olddots Aug 2013 #25
bravenak Aug 2013 #28
PDJane Aug 2013 #29
ZombieHorde Aug 2013 #31
LiberalEsto Aug 2013 #32
Egalitarian Thug Aug 2013 #34

Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 06:59 PM

1. ohmigod

 

She was asked to cook the dish but wasn't invited? She should have said "Okay! That'll be $50 bucks for the food."

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:01 PM

2. Unless

it was explained beforehand why she wasn't invited and was reasonable, I would have taken the food back with me. When you ask for food to be made, but don't include the person in a social setting, that's work, not friendship. So it better be a good reason and be told beforehand, like a dinner with a boss or client and someone can't cook a dish impressively. But you do not spring it right at the door when the food is presented. That's bad form.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to The Philosopher (Reply #2)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:05 PM

4. When she called her........

She said I'm having a party i need you to bring a dish if you don't mind. I would think that sounded like a invite.She never paid her for it. She should have told her beforehand as you said

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Reply #4)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 08:05 PM

27. It could be a mistake of clarity

but that doesn't give her the right to be upset at your friend's reaction. It's her responsibility when making a request to make sure everything is clear.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to The Philosopher (Reply #27)

Mon Aug 12, 2013, 06:23 PM

33. Who invites people to make food ,for a party their not invited to ?

 

A charitable organization raising money, is the only answer I can come up with , You ?

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to orpupilofnature57 (Reply #33)

Mon Aug 12, 2013, 07:29 PM

35. Like I said

an example might be where the person doesn't cook well and wants to impress the guest. If everything is explained beforehand when the request is made, it can be an act of friendship. Your friend does something for you, you pay the kindness back later. That didn't happen in this case, so the food stays with the appropriate party.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:05 PM

5. Holy crap!

That is just wrong on SO many levels! Your friend was right and if I were your friend I would have told the "hostess" to go to hell.

What the hell has happened to common courtesy and manners anymore?

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:05 PM

6. That's some bizarre mind games going on there.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:08 PM

7. I think...

I think I can all too easily understand why you don't like the woman who hosted the party. No doubt your friend better understands your feelings as well after this unpleasant incident.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Oakenshield (Reply #7)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:18 PM

10. This is why I dont like her....

When my daughter was 8 years old she was going to get some major surgery that changed the quality of her for the better. So a friend of mine wanted to throw her a party before the surgery to show that everyone was thinking of her. It was a very nice party by the way and very moving. This woman was invited to the party. She came in fixed a plate and walked out the door with it. the hostess' husband got up and took the plate from her and told her this isn't a buffet style party what are you doing. So she go mad and argued with them and decided to leave cause she didn't want to be bothered with people that day. what the heck. Oh yeah and she said my daughters oxygen tank was too noisy for her to enjoy her meal.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Reply #10)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:29 PM

13. How does that lady not get punched in the face every day?

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Iggo (Reply #13)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:45 PM

21. lol. nt

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Iggo (Reply #13)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 08:01 PM

26. Excellent question.

Can't say I have any clue myself.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Iggo (Reply #13)

Mon Aug 12, 2013, 08:15 PM

36. +10.000

Where does the line start? I would like to queue up.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Reply #10)


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:11 PM

8. WTF, the host should be happy the lasagne wasn't dumped on her carpet. nt

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to boston bean (Reply #8)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 08:18 PM

30. No shit. nt

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:15 PM

9. Not really a right or wrong thingy imo.

 

That is the wrong conclusion to try and draw. The hostess is unusual and not very good at their job. Your friend did not get all the information and that is both of their faults.

Assumptions can cause these kind of problems. Both parties assumed the wrong thing.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Rex (Reply #9)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:36 PM

16. Who in their right mind asks someone to make a dish

for a party and bring it to the party but then tells the person they aren't invited to the party and to leave? Of course, any reasonable human being would equate being asked to bring a dish to a party with an invitation to the party.

You must know some really weird people if you don't think it is a right or wrong thingy.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Rex (Reply #9)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:50 PM

24. Seriously? Who thinks they have to ask if they're invited

when someone asks you to bring food to a party ? "Hey Rex , I'm having a party,could you bring some lasagne and then go away?"

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:18 PM

11. sounds like the adult version of Mean Girls.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:26 PM

12. I really don't understand this

 

Is there any planet on which one calls someone up and says, "Can you make food for my party?" and expects this to be a catering arrangement?

I mean, WHY would the hostess think she could just get this person to make food, deliver it, and leave? Is there some reason to believe your friend just felt like making two dishes of lasagne and dropping them off?

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:33 PM

15. I think the hostess needs Human Relations 101

What was she thinking ? How rude.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:39 PM

17. I would have only taken one dish home.

The hostess would have been left wearing the other one.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:40 PM

18. The hostess is a sociopath

and very likely a cancervative.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:41 PM

19. $35 per lasagna for catering... your friend was right to walk. n/t

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:42 PM

20. Seriously? You have to ask who was right?

If I were your friend I would have told her the pans of lasagne are $40.00 each as soon as she told me I wasn't invited,then I would erase her from my life.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:45 PM

22. Your friend was right

Thankfully we have no such friends. I know no one rude enough to ask us to bring food to a party when we're not invited. Damn! How rude are people these days.
That is brazen stuff.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:47 PM

23. Tacky hostess, I can see why you don't like her .

 

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 07:58 PM

25. After I pushed the retch's face in the lasagne

 

I would have told her that any decent human wouldn't associate with her then I would have shit in the punch bowl .( is that kinda over doing it ? )

In other words with friends like that who needs enemas ....is the hostess a repukian by any chance ???????

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 08:06 PM

28. I think I know why you don't like her.

 

Wow. I am amazed at the gall of that woman.
" please stop by my party and bring two huge trays of free food, you can't stay though. You are not invited."
She should have her own show on fox.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 08:07 PM

29. Your friend was quite right, and far more polite than the hostess warranted.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 08:19 PM

31. The hostess was crack.

Your friend did the right thing, in my opinion.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Sun Aug 11, 2013, 09:06 PM

32. I would have been SORELY tempted to dump the lasagna on her head

 

Congratulations to your friend on her self-control.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to SummerSnow (Original post)

Mon Aug 12, 2013, 06:31 PM

34. I don't understand how you can even ask the question. Your friend is right and the hostess is

 

very likely a sociopath because that is the only scenario I can imagine where a nominal human could even imagine that such effrontery would be acceptable under any circumstance.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink

Reply to this thread