Family disputes gay server's story

[cali]

After a gay server at a New Jersey restaurant said a customer denied her a tip and wrote her a hateful note on the receipt, a local family contacted NBC 4 New York and said their receipt shows they paid a tip and didn't write any such note.

Dayna Morales, a former Marine and a server at Gallop Asian Bistro in Bridgewater, posted a photo on Facebook earlier this month, showing the bill with a line through the space for a tip. The photo of the receipt showed someone had written, "I'm sorry but I cannot tip because I do not agree with your lifestyle."

Morales indicated in her Facebook post, and in subsequent media interviews -- including with NBC 4 New York -- that the customer wrote that line.

But a family contacted NBC 4 New York claiming their receipt from the restaurant shows they did leave a tip, and provided what they said was a credit card statement as proof.

The husband and wife, who asked to remain anonymous, showed NBC 4 New York a receipt that appeared to be printed at the same minute, on the same date, for the same $93.55 total, except with an $18 tip.

<snip>

http://usnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2013/11/26/21625339-family-disputes-gay-servers-story?lite

[cali]

1. I'm kicking this because there's clearly reasonable doubt here

and these people may well have been falsely accused.

[el_bryanto]

2. I think the larger point is that it could have happened

Even if it didn't happen in this case.

Bryant

[B2G]

4. what?

[el_bryanto]

6. Sorry - should have put the sarcasm thingy.

[B2G]

7. Lol...I was hoping that's what you were going for

[Hassin Bin Sober]

3. How can they be falsely accused if they are anonymous?

[B2G]

5. again, what?

[NewJeffCT]

8. You'd need to see the credit card statement

to see if the amount charged was 93.55 or 111.55. The family could have written in the $18 afterwards to get back at the young woman and try to make people think she's lying. (I do that sometimes when leaving restaurant - I write in the tip on the copy I hand to the restaurant, and then don't on my copy until I get back home...)

[hrmjustin]

11. The credit card statement shows it was a $111 bill.

[HappyMe]

21. Uh oh.

Good grief, as if the lgbt community doesn't have a hard enough time with ..... everything.. as it is.

This is just not cool for her to have done, especially since she had to know that it could be disproved.

[Jeff In Milwaukee]

9. Are they serious?

All they had to do was save their copy of the receipt (which typically has nothing written on it) and then add a bogus tip and total after-the-fact. People have being doing this to inflate their expense accounts for years.

[hrmjustin]

12. The credit card statement shows it was a $111 bill.

[Jeff In Milwaukee]

37. My bad...

Didn't read the story the whole way through.

It really does seem a little peculiar.

[hrmjustin]

38. that ok. I was heartbroken when I heard it this morning.

[Jeff In Milwaukee]

47. I hear you...

It's really unfortunate. This stuff happens, but now everybody on Fox News will says that it's always a hoax.

[snooper2]

15. Um, there are videos from reporters with them showing their credit card statement

research topic-

form opinions-

Then share

[Ranchemp.]

18. The credit card statement proves their story.

Methinks that this waitress has some splaining to do.

[former9thward]

10. There have been several of these stories posted over the last couple years.

Almost everyone of them has turned out to be false or photoshopped. I'll bet that is the case here.

[Nye Bevan]

30. My problem with the story from the beginning was, how did they know she was a lesbian?

I can't imagine that she got into that kind of detail in conversation her customers. I don't typically have any idea of the sexual orientation of the server when I dine out.

[cbdo2007]

13. figures!

[last1standing]

14. Based on the Merchant Copy of the receipt, there was no tip.

Leaving aside the comment, which could have been easily written in after the fact, there is no tip listed on the Merchant Copy of the receipt. This is rather problematic as it means one of two things:

1). The customer wrote the tip on only the Customer Copy. While this is the easiest answer, it doesn't account for the billing statement showing an $18.00 tip.

2). The waitress, or someone else in the restaurant, created a new copy of the receipt which was then filled in with homophobic comments to create this stir.

I haven't seen proof that a tip was actually left but if the customer is willing to show the CC statement, which it sounds like they have done, things begin to point to a manipulation of the receipt.

So the final question becomes whether the waitress did it looking for attention or whether a co-worker did it as a way to harass the waitress?

I won't make any guesses as to what happened till the proof comes out but it does appear that someone has manipulated a document or two.

[B2G]

16. Well she certainly gained a lot finanacially as a result nt

[last1standing]

19. She claims she is donating the money and I have no reason to doubt that, yet.

It certainly wouldn't be the first time someone has pulled this kind of stunt for fame and money (see balloon boy scandal) but I'll wait to see the facts before judging.

[seveneyes]

22. No reason to doubt?

Assuming she is guilty of faking the note, that would be a reason to doubt her honesty. This whole episode could cause a lot more harm than good.

[last1standing]

24. That is "assuming she is guilty." I'm not assuming that.

If it is found that she, versus a co-worker or the customer, is the guilty party, then I will be willing to assume she did it for the money or attention.

The problem I see is that if it's found that she's an innocent party here, most of those "assuming" her guilt will fade away and never admit they were wrong. They'll merely move on to the next issue and restart the "assuming she's guilty" bit.

Personally, I'd like to wait till all the facts come out.

[cali]

27. I think there's reasonable doubt. and btw, the same thing about "melting away"

holds true for all those that made assumptions about the guilt of the patrons.

[last1standing]

34. It does. Fortunately, I haven't made assumptions either way.

Also, "reasonable doubt" is best decided after all the fact are presented, not before.

[Glassunion]

41. Actually she claimed that she was going to donate a "portion" of the money.

"Morales said she plans to send a portion of her new tips to the Wounded Warriors Project."

http://www.nbcnewyork.com/news/local/Gay-Restaurant-Server-Stiffed-Tip-Customer-Do-Not-Agree-Lifestyle-231998211.html

[blogslut]

23. I'm kind of wondering if that too.

That perhaps the waitress has an enemy coworker. Maybe a cashier?

[last1standing]

25. It happens.

I really don't know the facts yet, and neither do those rushing to condemn this woman. She may be guilty but no one here knows that.

[NYC_SKP]

42. ALLOW ME TO EXPLAIN:

This story prompted me to check some receipts I was just going through for my monthly expense report.

The slips they bring you back to sign and insert a tip come to you AFTER they've run your card. So, the approval for the base amount is on there as is an approval code.

BUT NOT THE TIP.

In the end, the customer billing statement is good evidence, but the vendor also has access to evidence in their transaction records.

Also, I've often been given three slips, not sure why, but I suspect SOMEONE doctored one of the merchant slips or printed a second one.

[last1standing]

43. If that's the case, this issue should be easily solved by checking the signature.

As I suggested above, this may end up being another balloon boy scandal. Personally, I don't know whether I hope someone forged the receipt or whether I hope the family stiffed the waitress. Both possibilities are rather sad.

[Trekologer]

44. Actually the amount that is pre-approved is typically the base plus 18-20% for a tip

The reason being you don't want to have the pre-tip amount approved but with tip declined. Similarly, gas stations will pre-approve around $50 and hotels will pre-approve the room rate plus an additional amount for incidental expenses, which is why most post a warning about using a debit card.

Many credit card online account portals will list these pending transactions. However, the image of the account statement appears to be a finalized one.

[tammywammy]

17. That's just a nasty false accusation.

I don't know what the server's motivation would be, since the family could just show the credit card statement and disprove the accusation. But then again, the clarification and truth won't get nearly as much media attention as the original false accusation.

Also, I've noticed with a lot of these restaurant receipt stories, people send in donations, I wonder if the server wanted to just cash in.

[JVS]

36. Motivation

I think a possible motivation for this would be that similar instances have resulted in the story going viral and small donations from the internet adding up into thousands of dollars.

[BlueCheese]

46. If (a big if) this was fabricated...

... my guess would be the server assumed that with the receipt blurred out, the actual customers wouldn't ever figure out it was their receipt.

[Dash87]

20. This could also be a scam, if even by the restaurant.

I'm not saying this isn't real, but it's not unthinkable that someone would take advantage of others' kindness. It's well known that stories like this cause a lot of donations from around the world.

[Skip Intro]

26. Always two sides to every story.

Accusations do not equal proof.

[Nye Bevan]

28. A Red Lobster waitress got a donation of over $10,000 when the n-word was supposedly written

on her receipt by a customer.

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/red-lobster-waitress-10-000-donation-racist-fiasco-article-1.1482113

But subsequent handwriting analysis suggested that the racial slur was not in the handwriting of either the customer or his wife.

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/red-lobster-customer-claims-racist-bad-tipper-article-1.1490962

I'm not accusing anyone of anything but in these days of sympathetic folks donating thousands of dollars to apparent victims of prejudice there is certainly an incentive for shenanigans.

[cali]

29. I don't any problem saying this: Bigotry is horrible. So are false accusations of bigotry

I don't see that one is any morally superior than the other.

The evidence leads me to believe the patrons did not write the note and did leave a tip. Also, in this day and age of instant backlash, who the hell leaves a bigoted note with their personal information and a signature? Why not just post a bulls eye on your back?

[Nye Bevan]

31. Yeah, the more I think about it, the fishier it seems (nt)

[Marr]

32. How were they even supposed to have known she was gay? /nt

[Ranchemp.]

35. I seriously doubt that her being gay came up in conversation.

"Good evening, I'll be your gay waitress, may I take your order?"

Somehow, I just don't see this happening.

[Chan790]

39. I'm not sure it has to come up in conversation.

I've had customers assume, to the extent that they felt comfortable commenting on it...on account of my speech impediment (I'm hard-of-hearing and slightly stutter and trip/lisp over words.) and the fact that I'm effete in mannerisms. I've been called f*gg*t before by customers too. I've also been called a {black person, except they used a word beginning with n and ending with r.}...which is strange because I'm Scottish, Native American and Syrian: I don't even look black...possibly Hispanic, but not black. I'm categorically beige...most often people think I'm Mediterranean of some sort: Spanish, Italian, Greek, Moroccan, etc.

You have clearly never worked in a public-facing position if you think clients and customers never make assumptions on your sexuality or other personal traits based on observation and intuition, faulty or otherwise. They don't have to know you're gay...to "know" you're gay. You don't have to be *anything* to draw the attentions, ire and invective of morons for that matter.

[Skip Intro]

33. And another fake: "Get a Real Job:"

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/trending-now/banker-1-tip-hoax-real-receipt-obtained-195827093.html

[Glassunion]

40. It's just shitty and just as offensive either way.

I'm leaning towards the feeling that the waitress hoaxed this.

That said, if the couple did say and write that on the receipt, it is absolutely horrible of them. If they did no such thing and the receipt was faked, that is absolutely horrible of the waitress.

Why I feel that the waitress faked it.
1. The handwriting on the receipts is different. In fact the merchant copy with the offensive message on it was written by a right handed person. The customer copy was written by a left handed person. You can tell by the slash where the tip should be, and the tops of the 5's on the merchant copy. They go left to right, however the tops of the 5's on the customer copy head in the other direction.

2. They did supply their credit card receipt, and their card was charged an additional 19.24% or an even $18.00.

I hope the truth comes out either way, as whoever was falsely accused should be vindicated.

[BlueCheese]

45. This might turn out to be like that finger-in-the-chili incident...

... where the customer stuck a severed finger into the chili at a restaurant and looked to cash in.

If so, I guess I'll be relieved that there wasn't really a hateful customer out there who wrote the note. On the other hand, if it turns out to be a bid for sympathy and money, well, it's not good to play with serious issues of prejudice and give the genuinely bigoted any ammunition.