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Top Ten Conservative Idiots of the Week
[font style="font-size:1.539em; text-transform:uppercase;"]The Coca Cola Edition[/font]
Life is back to normal. Republicans are back in the faux poutrage about something meaningless, this time a completely inoffensive Coca Cola Ad during the Super Bowl (1). Also, GOP Civil War (4) seems to be starting with a banging, conspiracy theorists (9) are batshit crazy and Bill O’Reilly has an epiphany (10). And as always, don't forget the key. Remember, you can run your mouse over the icon to see what it means. At the end, the writer will give a small tribute to one of the greatest men of the past 100 years.
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[font style="font-size:1.539em; text-transform:uppercase;"]Conservative Pundits[/font]
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So, it is Super Sunday and all the best ads come out for a game that, as always, was over quickly (like after the first play). This is the time where ads are the best, funniest or more intelligent.
Coca Cola decided to do a patriotic, multi-cultural ad using “America the Beautiful” as the backdrop being sung in English, Spanish and Arabic. Cue the conservative belly aching.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]Former tea party congressman Allen West even took time to write a blog post during the game to voice his displeasure. For West, the ad started out strong enough.
"Then the words went from English to languages I didn’t recognize," a troubled West wrote, calling it "a truly disturbing commercial."
"If we cannot be proud enough as a country to sing 'American (sic) the Beautiful' in English in a commercial during the Super Bowl, by a company as American as they come — doggone we are on the road to perdition," he wrote.
This asshole is still around? Doesn’t he have more self-hating to do? Or else, more war crimes to be accused of. Well, Allen West is just Uncle Ruckas anyway Maybe he’s alone.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]Michael Patrick Leahy over at Breitbart was offended, too.
Not only did Coke use "a deeply Christian patriotic anthem whose theme is unity – in several foreign languages," but Leahy noted that the "ad also prominently features a gay couple."
AHHHH!!!! HOMOS!!!! ON MY TV SCREEN!!! And they are not in a parade, on a reality show or being characters in a stupid sitcom like Will and Grace. And how dare Coca Cola use other languages of inferior people to show unity. If people wanted to be united, they should all speak English with an American accent (not British, Canadian, Aussie or New York/Bostonian accents), be wealthy and white Christians. That we we can truly become the great American melting pot.
Let’s look at Fixed Noise. They are a legitimate news agency. Maybe they have a fresh perspective.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]Fox News commentator Todd Starnes doesn't like hearing foreign languages during the Super Bowl either.
Couldn't make out that song they were singing. I only speak English.
— toddstarnes (@toddstarnes) February 3, 2014
So was Coca-Cola saying America is beautiful because new immigrants don't learn to speak English?
— toddstarnes (@toddstarnes) February 3, 2014
Coca Cola is the official soft drink of illegals crossing the border. #americaisbeautiful
— toddstarnes (@toddstarnes) February 3, 2014
Todd only speaks English, but only understands Racist Asshole. Damn Mexicans and their illegal immigrant language. And all you 6.7 billions non Americans out there. . .how dare you fucking speak your language! Especially in this country, where the official language is English and all peop. . .what? We don’t? According to wikipedia:
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]The United States does not have a national official language; nevertheless, English (specifically American English) is the primary language used for legislation, regulations, executive orders, treaties, federal court rulings, and all other official pronouncements; although there are laws requiring documents such as ballots to be printed in multiple languages when there are large numbers of non-English speakers in an area.
Yeah, so that is that! America doesn’t have an official language and America the Beautiful needs to be sung in English because that’s what Jesus would have wanted. Wait. . .Jesus didn’t speak English either? You’re shitting me!. Moses too?
Well, at least God speaks English. At least, that’s what God told me before he spoke through my dog about how aliens where sending anti-American soup recipes to lesbians through an invisible radar attached to my penis.
Rod Serling may have wrote the Twilight Zone, but we now live it. To end this, look at this twitter screencap from a twit!
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It is news to me that America the Beautiful is the national anthem. I always thought it was that warmongering Star Spangled Banner. You learn something new everyday.
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[font style="font-size:1.539em; text-transform:uppercase;"]John Boehner[/font]
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Orange Glo is back and more irrelevant than EVER! And he is working on not just being the Worst Speaker of the House ever, but the Worst Speaker of the House since the beginning of time.
Apparently not willing to play second fiddle to Cantor and Ryan, the Ohio Tearduct has decided to do something about the continuing GOP orgasm over Benghazi.
See, the way it works is four Americans died in a terrorist attack, so therefore someone’s head needs to role and because Obama is a scary black communist, fascist, muslim kenyan socialist, he must be the first. Even though there is no evidence of any wrongdoing and the fact that the GOP cut the embassy’s security budget. . .it’s all Obama’s fault. And the Ohio Tearduct will show you that opening a website. How lazy and half-assed.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]House Speaker John Boehner (R-Ohio) announced the creation Wednesday of a new page on the Republican Party Web site on which the party plans to publish information and documents related to the attacks of Sept. 11 and 12, 2012, on two U.S. compounds in Benghazi, Libya, as House Republicans continue to accuse President Obama of stonewalling their attempts to investigate the attack further.
The site -- GOP.gov/Benghazi -- contains the House and Senate committee reports of their investigations into the Benghazi attacks, which killed four Americans, including Ambassador Christopher Stevens, as well as transcripts and notes from various congressional committee hearings on the attacks. "This site brings the facts straight to the American people by way of hundreds of pages of documents and transcripts the White House doesn't want you to read," Boehner's press office wrote in a release announcing the new Web page. "The investigation is ongoing, and the search for the truth continues, so new documents will be added as they are made available."
The White House doesn’t want people to see these documents or transcripts? Couldn’t the White House should classify them? Better yet. . .since they were released to the public, maybe there is nothing there anyway, since classifying documents is usually done to protect a person’s reputation and not for national security (though national security is the overwhelmingly standard reason).
All of this leads to one question. Is this prick the worst Speaker of the House ever? Or was there one worse? I’ll let the readers decide.
In November, someone needs to get to a drug store. Johnboy’s going to need alot of issues and vodka as he realizes he will have to pass the gavel to Nancy Pelosi. Which will be fun to watch:
Worst. Speaker. Ever. Please introduce the Best Speaker Ever!
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[font style="font-size:1.539em; text-transform:uppercase;"]Republican Tricksters[/font]
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[div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Dumb"] [div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Dumb"]Let’s look at the modern Republican Party. A loose group of racists, nihilists, dominionists, sociopathic oligarchs, uneducated rabble, jingoists, nationalists, fundamentalists and corportists all working together to build an American Ayn Rand, Milton Friedman and Charles and David Koch can enjoy.
To succeed, they need to win the hearts and minds of the voters. Not only will they get their voters, but campaign donations. However, the GOP is lagging behind a bit on the money end. Nevertheless, the GOP has decided to (Again) open websites to get people to donate to Democrats(?). Well, sort of.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]If you donate to a candidate online, pay attention to the fine print to make sure your donation goes to the candidate you want and not his or her opponent.
The National Republican Congressional Committee has launched a series of websites that look like they support a Democratic candidate for Congress, but instead direct contributions to the Republican Party instead. The Tampa Bay Times interviews one donor who thought he was giving to Alex Sink's (D) congressional campaign. It even used the same blue and green color scheme as the candidate's official website. But he didn't see the small print, which said, "Make a contribution today to help defeat Alex Sink and candidates like her."
Looks legit, if you look at it without blinking. Take a second and you will see “Make a contribution today to help defeat Alex Sink and candidates like her.” It’s a GOP site made to look like a legit campaign site.
See, this is how it works. Bankrupt ideas, bankrupt ideology, bankrupt party (except for their corporate sponsors), so they resort to cheating and deception.
As always, the GOP did what it does best in response: lied!
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]The NRCC defended the sites to NBC News, and said Democrats were upset because their candidates are struggling.
But the data tells a different story. Democrats are actually raising significantly more money than Republicans.
A Wall Street Journal review of the latest campaign filings finds that the top Democratic candidates in the 52 most competitive House races reported raising $42.3 million last year, easily beating the $34.8 million for the top Republican candidates in those races.
Democrats are upset because their candidates are struggling. Wow! That Fixed Noise Channel echo chamber has completely destroyed the GOP’s ability to see beyond the dashboard.
November is beginning to look really good.
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[font style="font-size:1.539em; text-transform:uppercase;"]GOP Circular firing squad[/font]
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[div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Cheese"]
The GOP is going the way of the old Whig Party (which is the grandfather of the modern GOP). It was only a matter of time. Look at their heroes: Reagan. . .ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm! Lincoln, but that was over 150 years ago.
So, the Whigs died due to ideological purity tests and requiring members to adhere to their political dogma of the party no matter how detrimental it was. The only thing that mattered was the party.
The GOP has become that today. Any Republican Congressional Member that bucks the system will face a tea-bagging primary challenge. Even leadership. Especially leadership. Let’s let Mr. Irrelevant himself, Brent Bozell explain.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]"Time and again, year after year, the Republican leadership in the House and Senate has come to grassroots conservatives, and Tea Party supporters pleading for our money, our volunteers, our time, our energy and our votes," ForAmerica Chairman Brent Bozell said in a statement to CNN. "In return they have repeatedly promised not just to stop the liberal assault on our freedoms and our national treasury, but to advance our conservative agenda. It's been years. There is not a single conservative accomplishment this so-called 'leadership' can point to."
The group told CNN that they will run digital ads targeting House Speaker John Boehner (R-Ohio), Majority Leader Eric Cantor (R-Va.) and Majority Whip Kevin McCarthy (R-Calif.), as well as Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) and Minority Whip John Cornyn (R-Texas).
Cut that head off the snake, boys. Target those five assholes big time. Primary them! Do it! Don’t stop! Keep it going! Split the party even more.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]ForAmerica rallied against the Affordable Care Act last September along with Sens. Mike Lee (R-Utah), Ted Cruz (R-Texas) and Rand Paul (R-Ky.).The Wall Street Journal reported in December that the House's Republican leadership aims to discipline the party's more conservative members and achieve consensus on legislation ahead of this year's elections.
Please. Please. Please! More nutjobs! More people that make Allen West look like a flaming liberal! Please! More! More! Make Congress BRIGHT FUCKING BLUE!!!
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[font style="font-size:1.539em; text-transform:uppercase;"]ACA Opponents[/font]
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[div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Lame"]Nothing causes the GOP more angina and acid reflux than the ACA. That godless, communistic, liberal idea spouted by then GOP governor of Massachusets Mitt Romney has been the destruction of this great country. More than allowing two gayo-Americans to get married. Giving everyone access to medical care!?!?! HOW WRONG!!!
But, according to the CBO, there is more to this. And Republicans hate it completely.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]The idea that Obamacare could give people more freedom sure struck a nerve with those who hate the health care reform law, and apparently hate that people could choose to work less because of it.
But in a hearing Wednesday, CBO Director Douglas Elmendorf explained how that is not so: His office's report, he noted, actually says that Obamacare produces a net increase in employment, and cuts the deficit.
Let’s look at some of the tweets from the twits on twitter.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]Who pays for these newly "free" people, you fucking hack? https://t.co/fRYLKK3cRw @mmcauliff
— RB (@RBPundit) February 4, 2014
@mmcauliff Let's just all quit our jobs and write poems and shit. Hey moron, this is my face right this very moment. pic.twitter.com/gWuO0Xh59q
— Becca (@SnarkyPitBull) February 5, 2014
@mmcauliff You're a SENIOR CONGRESSIONAL REPORTER?! A SENIOR?! Are you fucking KIDDING me with this shit?
— Harry (@Tark31) February 4, 2014
Who pays for these “free people?” Their jobs, of course. But because they don’t need to have two or three of them and work 60 - 80 hours a week, they can go back to 30 - 40 and not worry about getting killed on the health costs.
Nowhere in the CBO report does it say to QUIT your job, Becca. These people are just braindead. Elmendorf went on to explain all of this in very simple words to very simple people.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]As for the idea that millions of new shirkers would join Mitt Romney's infamous 47 percent, well, the people who might work less thanks to Obamacare would actually be doing things most Americans praise. Many would be moms and dads working fewer hours to spend time with their kids. There would be older, sicker Americans who only work now because it's the only way they can get health care. People with multiple jobs could cut that number to one. And many people would be able to take advantage of the new health-care safety net to start their own businesses -- 1.5 million according to one estimate from the Urban Institute.
What? Americans don’t need to be wage slaves to medical bills and can spend more time with their families. HOW FUCKING UNAMERICAN!!! It’s every American family’s right to make their kids latchkey kids where their dominant adult influence is the T.V.
As for multiple job holding Americans, former pResident Chimpy McPlasticturkey said that’s uniquely American and good. And then asked the poor woman if she got any sleep. Hahahahahaha!!!!
Please explain, Elmendorf.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]"There is a critical difference between people who would like to work and can’t find a job, or have a job that is lost for reasons beyond their control, and people who choose not to work," Elmendorf said.
"If someone comes up to you and says, 'Well, the boss said I’m being laid off because we don’t have enough business to pay me,' that person feels bad about that and we sympathize with them for having lost their job," he continued. "If someone comes to you and says, 'I’ve decided to retire,' or 'I’ve decided to stay home and spend more time with my family,' or 'I’ve decided to spend more time doing my hobby' –- they don’t feel bad about it, they feel good about it. And we don’t sympathize, we say congratulations. And we don’t say they’ve lost their job, we say they’ve chosen to leave their job."
Elmendorf also explained that while having health care options would encourage some people to seek coverage outside their employer, it hardly means that most people would stop working altogether, since most people need a job for more than just health insurance.
"It's not that they have no incentive to work, it's that they have smaller incentive to work," he said.
Okay, issue with the last statement. Smaller incentive? Please explain. We have jobs to pay for our lives, not doctors and hospitals. A job should not be a pre-requisite for medical care.
Can you see why the ACA causes the GOP angina? Don’t worry, GOP. Poutrage and Angina are covered under Obamacare. Just go to the national exchange website and enroll.
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[font style="font-size:1.539em; text-transform:uppercase;"]Carondelet High School for Girls[/font]
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[div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Loser"] [div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Batshit Crazy"]February is Black History month. This is a time when we should be teaching the words of WEB DuBois, Booker T. Washington, Medgar Evers, Malcolm X, Freddrick Douglas, the Tulsa Race Riots of 1923 and the travesty of George Stinney. It’s a time when we as a nation need to reflect on our long, and sorry, history of racism. Maybe not just black history month, but all history month. Native Americans, Women, Homosexuals. But February is set aside to remember those who came to this land in chains.
Schools normally put on events or have workshops for students to highlight black history month. In Northern California, the Carondelet High School for Girls decided to do this for their students. What better way to honor black history month than to serve your students Fried Chicken, Watermelon and Collared Greens. What, no Kool Aid?
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]A San Francisco Bay Area private all-girl Christian high school has won the ire of parents after an ill conceived decision to put fried chicken, cornbread and watermelon on a Black History Month celebration lunch menu.
Officials at Carondelet High in Concord have had to dole out some serious apologies for the debacle, which some students actually first conceived on Friday as a way to celebrate the holiday.
But good intentions weren't enough to keep community members angry at the arguably racist menu at bay.
I wonder if they would wash it all down with a 40 of Colt 45 while playing with a 9.
Somehow, the Principal, Nancy Libby, still has her job. As do the teachers that supported this crap. They went into full damage control mode!
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]'I'd like to apologize for the announcement and any hurt this caused students, parents or community members,' Principal Libby wrote in the letter. 'Please know that at no time at Carondelet do we wish to perpetrate racial stereotypes.'
Nah. . .no one thinks that. Just tell those who were offended to go tell it to their mammy! So, what is the upshot?
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]She also said the school plans to hold a racial sensitivity assembly for both faculty and students.
This will sound racist, but I live in China and have seen this for a long time. They are doing what most Chinese employers do. See, here. . .no one gets fired. It’s about saving face. It isn’t that the person is useless, has no ability and screwed everything up. . .it’s they haven’t been given proper training. So we will train them to do a better job. No real consequences. . .just the appearance of fixing a problem.
The assembly will all be done in blackface too, speaking ebonics and pidgeon English, flashing gang signs and serving grape and orange soda.
What is sad is this school is in the San Francisco Bay Area.
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[font style="font-size:1.539em; text-transform:uppercase;"]Jim Bridenstine[/font]
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[div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Lame"] [div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Batshit Crazy"]It’s time for townhall meeting with the boobs that elect Republicans. Let’s pack the hall with racists, dumbasses, fucktards, halfwits, twits, boobs, fundamentalist yokels and tin-foil Alex Jones/Glenn Beck types.
This townhall comes to us from Oklahoma (ugh), where first term teabagger Jim Bridenstine comes from and from where he infects Congress. Everything was going well until some weird woman gets up and screeches that Obama needs to be executed. What!?!?!
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]A recent Republican town hall got thrown a little off-course with something rather outlandish proposed by a member of the crowd; this time a woman who used her opportunity to talk at Congressman Jim Bridenstine‘s town hall about why President Obama “should be executed as an enemy combatant.”
The woman called Obama “moron” and a “criminal” who is acting wholly without authority and “nobody’s doing anything” to reign him in. There was some awkward laughter as she brought up the execution of the president, and Bridenstine brushed past it to keep going after Obama on his lawlessness in bypassing Congress.
Look, news media. The meeting didn’t get thrown off course. This is normal. This happens all the time. It is as common as sunrise with teabaggers. You pricks in the media just refuse to call a spade a spade and make it sound like women like this at Republican townhalls are not the norm. They are.
But here’s the bigger problem. Instead of booing this woman, heckling her or telling her to shut up, the crowd just laughed at the idea of executing a sitting president. And the Congressman didn’t stop the woman, remove her mic to scold her for this. . .he just continued the teabagger line.
Then another woman popped up and spouted this turd of wisdom.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]He took another question from a woman who said that the Senate needs to change hands so “we can impeach the SOB.”
The Senate doesn’t impeach, asshat. It votes on conviction or acquittal. Your boy Jim Bridenstine hs the power to impeach Obama. And everyone is daring him, or another idiot to do it. But, you see, teabaggers. . .you’re being played. Your heroes of King, Bachmann, Gohmert, Kingston, Broun, Ryan, Farenthood, etc. . .they know they would get destroyed with impeachment hearings. As a result, they won’t do it, but they will keep you angry so you morons keep sending them money.
All in all, the Republican Party has become a giant ponzi scheme. And suckers are born every minute, like the ones that vote for Jim Bridenstine.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]
[font style="font-size:1.539em; text-transform:uppercase;"]Ted Nugent[/font]
[div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Lame"]
[div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Batshit Crazy"] [div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Dumb"] [div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Massive Ego"] [div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Obama Hating"]Shitboy draftdodger Ted “Cat Scratch Fever and nothing else” Nugent is back in the news. And for the same reasons. Let’s just look at what Mr. Tough Guy has to scream about this week.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]Right-wing rocker Ted Nugent is not happy with the Republican Party -- and with a flare that only the Motor City Madman could come up with, he painted an awfully graphic picture of why the GOP has left him feeling disappointed.
BigMedia.org first surfaced Nugent's comments after he was asked by Denver morning talk-radio host Peter Boyles on Monday morning, "What happened to the Republican Party?"
Oh Goody, goody. A wack-a-loon from the GOP is going to tell us what’s wrong with today’s GOP. Older, more racist demographic that is dying off. . .a party of the upper 1%. Religious fundamentalism, anti-intellectualism. Anti-science, anti-logic, anti-choice, anti-civil rights. . .are these what’s wrong, Teddy Tell us all! Enlighten us!
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]“What happened to the Republican Party?” Boyles asked Nugent. “Someone extracted their scrotum with a rusty shiv,” was Nugent’s considered reply. “They have no balls. I don’t know where this ‘Let’s be Mr. Rogers with a Lawrence Welk soundtrack tie adjusting’ mantra came from, but my god! If there’s a life-support system attached to the GOP, it’s flat-lining,” he continued.
{speechless}
Umm. . .uuuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmmmmmm.
He actually brought up the word scrotum in a political discussion.
Adjectives and nouns fail me.
Please proceed, Psycho.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]An excited Nugent also went on to say that "the country is being flushed down the toilet, certainly for the last fifteen or twenty years" and slammed the American media, saying the "media in this country is basically Joseph Goebbels' propaganda ministry."
Fifteen or twenty years? So, does that include the Bush years too? And a Nazi reference!
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]Nugent then went on to bleat like a sheep, describing the sounds as the "New American National Anthem."
So, let’s see. A sex reference, a Nazi reference and a sheep reference. Trifecta of stupid!
Next up for underage girl pervert Ted is a long diatribe on why he needs viagra just to get up in the morning.
Pete Seeger, Phil Ochs and Harry Chapin are all gone from us, and this asshole still gets a forum.
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[font style="font-size:1.539em; text-transform:uppercase;"]Blizzard Conspiracy Nuts[/font]
[div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Obama Hating"]
[div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Dumb"] [div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Dumb"] [div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Dumb"] [div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Dumb"] [div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Dumb"]If I could put that icon 10,000 times, it wouldn’t be enough for #9 this week. This is just so much stupid wrapped up in one entry. Apparently, Obama now controls the weather.
Let’s look at the bullshit.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]"I have a sample of 'snow' ... leaving the snow unmelted." (Via YouTube / sugar magnolia)
The conspiracy reasoning goes like this: the snow is unusual in Georgia and other southeast areas and doesn't melt when burned. Therefore, it must be fake snow, distributed by the government, as a diversion from big government tyranny: (Via YouTube / Div9neImages)
"You're being distracted from all fronts, you're preoccupied. They're up here signing bills, the government, to pretty much take away more of your rights and freedoms." (Via YouTube / Occult Sin)
I see. Send in the blizzards and create more government tyranny. It’s all Obama’s fault.
I get it now. Something makes you inconvenienced in a way. . .blame Obama. I have sulphur burps: Government conspiracy. My hangnail hurts. Obama made it worse! I have a fucking math test tomorrow! GOD DAMN GOVERNMENT TAKING MY RIGHT TO BE A DUMBASS!!!
The stupid doesn’t stop there.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]Some skeptics tie the fake snow to a wider, and older, conspiracy regarding "geo-engineering" and the fear that the government is manipulating weather to use as a weapon. (Via The Resistance Journals)
A weather death ray? This isn’t The Onion!!!
Not to be outdone, those science people tried to explain to asshats what happens. How much of you think entered the granite rock they call heads?
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]Science-savvy reporters and experts have been quick to point out that snow doesn't melt when exposed to open flame like this.
"When you heat something like this, it goes from a solid to a gas. It's called sublimation. It doesn't go from a solid to a liquid, i.e. melting." (Via WTVR)
Oh, and that black mark left on the snow? And the chemical smell? That's from the butane in the lighter itself when it's left so close to the snow — which, by the way, does melt when exposed to heat, like from a microwave, rather than an open flame. (Via YouTube / JediSoulfly)
Now, from a physical geography teacher. . .what is causing all this wear weather is three things:
1: Mass influx of cold, fresh water into the warm upper level ocean currents all found on the eastern side of a continent which super cools the cold, dense, deep ocean current, cutting off precipitation in the west (look at CA this year). As that water reaches the equator, the mass influx of water heats and creates more vapor which is carried by the prevailing winds and the trade winds, bringing more fierce storms.
2: With the CO2 levels rising, the albedo rate for heating and sunlight isn’t normal anymore. The heat and light gets trapped and most doesn’t reflect anymore.
3: Deforestation and exhausting non-renewable land resources causing massive desertification. Farmlands can’t be recharged because they are being intensified and Rain forests are being stripped.
Nah. . .fuck that science noise. Nothing beats a good conspiracy theory!
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]
[font style="font-size:1.539em; text-transform:uppercase;"]Bill O’Reilly[/font]
[div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Obama Hating"]
[div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Crybaby"]
[div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Dumb"] [div style="display:inline-block; padding-left:0.3077em;" title="Massive Ego"][div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]
And finally. . .well, let’s just let Bill Orally speak for himself.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]Fox News host Bill O’Reilly shot back at The Daily Show’s Jon Stewart on Wednesday, challenging Stewart to appear on his show — saying “he owes me an appearance” — and accusing Stewart of pooh-poohing legitimate concerns on his part.
“Mr. Stewart echoing what President [Barack] Obama said,” O’Reilly said. “That some of the issues I brought up have been ‘thoroughly investigated.’ Of course, that’s a farce.”
Of course isn’t farce! Jon Stewart is a fucking comedian! You are, or are supposed to be be a legitimate newshound. Jon Stewart is on Comedy Central. You’re on a channel that uses the word “News” in the title. Of course you’re going to be lampooned! Especially when you sound like a fucking doofus.
Jon Stewart owes you nothing! Deal with it. . .or did the big bad Daily Show step on your little footsies and hurt you. Don’t worry. . .all you need is your photo of Andrea Mackris and your falafel!
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]“I know — and you probably know, too — that these issues aren’t important to Jon Stewart, or even to the president,” O’Reilly said on Wednesday. “They don’t see them as vital, because they don’t pertain to social justice, or global warming. So, if I ask about those issues, I’m a doofus, a scandal-monger.”
If the shoe fits, dipshit! But he said it himself. He’s a doofus. Accepting the problem is the first step to recovery, Bill. We’re all proud of you. Now everyday, get up, look in the mirror and say “I’m Bill. . .and I’m a doofus.” Then maybe we’ll stop seeing pictures like the one below
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]
Yes, we can’t explain that. But can you explain why people think you’re a doofus? Please continue with your attack on a comedian!
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]Then, promising to “speak slowly” for Stewart’s benefit, O’Reilly repeated his assertions that there are “allegations” that Obama lied about the Benghazi assault, and that the medical law was being “forced” upon Americans. O’Reilly did not mention that several states have already exercised the option of choosing to reject the state healthcare exchanges enacted under “Obamacare.”
Who’s allegations? What evidence? Quoting some blog like Newsmax or World Nut Daily. . .or Townhall isn’t news, Bill. Maybe again, if he weren’t so up his own ass.
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]
Still waiting.
He finished off his show by saying the following!
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]“Are you hearing me out there in left-wing fantasyland?” O’Reilly said. “Good grief.”
We hear you, but we don’t care. You’re a craphead!
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]
Maybe we don’t want to. Because you are doofus. Sometime this year, Bill will go Dan Quayle and start an argument with Sheldon Cooper, Peter Griffin or Eric Cartman.
Just remember, Bill
[div class="excerpt" style="background-color:#F4E0E0; border:1px solid #E8C0C0; box-shadow:-1px -1px 3px #C66666 inset; border-radius:0.6em; margin:0.5385em 0em 0em 0.5385em;"]
Again, who needs sciencey stuff when you have Fixed Noise dogma?
See you next week.
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Even my local Prick made it, jim birdenstine
And yes I capitalized correctly 
