There's a National Clown Shortage (No congress content)

[Bennyboy]

EXCLUSIVE: National clown shortage may be approaching, trade organizations fear
As the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus returns to Brooklyn Thursday, membership at the country's largest clown organizations has plunged over the past decade amid declining interest, old age and higher standards for the jokesters.
By Natalie Musumeci / NEW YORK DAILY NEWS



http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/exclusive-national-clown-shortage-approaching-article-1.1616801

[Earth_First]

1. Portlandia claims that clowning is still a popular career path in Portland, Oregon.

They may want to check there...

[1000words]

2. That's it! You people have held me back long enough ...

I'm going to Clown College!

[shenmue]

3. What will this do to the water-spurting flower industry?

[pscot]

4. Some guy recently shot

the last one. He said he was real sorry he done it, too.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

5. Good. They're creepy.

[LumosMaxima]

6. I never saw the point of clowns.

Even as a kid, I thought they were just kind of stupid.

[scarletwoman]

7. Good. I can't stand clowns.

I abhored them as a young child, and nothing has changed my mind since.

[lpbk2713]

8. Well, there's hope for Mitch McConnell after the next election after all.

It must be a comfort to him to know there is a field he can get into.

[Tree-Hugger]

9. Because they are under beds

Waiting to snatch children during thunderstorms. Haven't the Ringling Bros watched Poltergeist?

Fucking evil clowns. Now I won't be able to fall asleep.

[Warren DeMontague]

10. Don't we have a national helium reserve? Can't we do the same thing with clowns?

You know, just keep them all in some giant, supercooled metal tank.

[okaawhatever]

11. Years ago I wrote a loan for a guy who had graduated clown college, yes it's a thing, was working

part-time as a clown and was going back to school for.....mortuary science. I didn't ask.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

12. A perfect setup for an undertaker.

Evil clown kills, then does the funeral.