Greatest Pharmacist Ever Prescribes Anti-Monster Spray for 6-Year-Old

[onehandle]

If there's an award for the most adorable prescription of the year, pharmacist Jeff Dodds of Watford City, North Dakota has this year's title on lockdown. And all it took was some creative labeling and a very sleepy six-year-old girl with a monster problem.

While at the local Barrett Pharmacy & Variety, a little girl approached Dodds with a not-entirely-medical condition; all those monsters under her bed were keeping her up at night. And being the resourceful pharmacist that he is, Dodds decided to whip up a cure of his own concoction, ultimately producing the holy grail for frightened children everywhere—100% pharmacist-certified anti-monster spray.

The instructions are simple enough: "Spray around the room at night before bed, repeat if necessary." But this one simple, kind act has likely done loads for the girl's own peace of mind. Not to mention what it's done to restore our faith in humanity. The world could definitely use a few more Jeff Dodds.

http://gizmodo.com/greatest-pharmacist-ever-prescribes-anti-monster-spray-1541252081

[randome]

1. Awesome!

[hr][font color="blue"][center]I'm always right. When I'm wrong I admit it.
So then I'm right about being wrong.[/center][/font][hr]

[MineralMan]

2. Nice. I'll bet it works really well, too.

K&R

[Orrex]

3. Stupid.

This is going to result in an explosion of anti-monster-spray-resistant monsters.

[OKNancy]

5. ROFL - good one

[JimDandy]

6. LOL! n/t

[okaawhatever]

12. ROFL. thanks, I needed a laugh. nt

[FSogol]

16. Plus, she only has one refill. Monster are good at waiting it out.

[KittyWampus]

31. hence the logic of the older, tried and true method of leaving a few cookies out to appease

the monsters rather than trying to kill them off.

[Orrex]

34. Finally!

A voice of reason!

[cui bono]

52. But then they tell all their monster friends and they all come over for cookie parties.

The little girl is still scared of them but keeps feeding them so they'll be nice and eventually they eat the family out of house and home. So the monsters take over the house and become squatters. But since there are no more cookies coming they get very angry. They go out and storm the neighborhood, demanding cookies. Everyone calls the police about these cookie monsters and the story gets on the news that the cookie monsters are very irate and are breaking into all the houses. Mothers Against Cookie Monsters start protesting and picketing Sesame Street. The show's ratings go way down and they have to kill off the Cookie Monster to try and save it. I mean he was nice and everything but the people have seen REAL cookie monsters now and are mad that Sesame Street makes their kids think they are friendly. This causes even more psychological trauma to kids. The original little girl who left the cookies out sees this episode on a TV in the window of the store in whose doorway she is standing, begging for change in her now tattered clothing since her family has now been homeless a while. She sees what her actions have caused and starts to cry, then she yells "what have I done?" and commits suicide by running out in front of a bus.

So you see, that won't work.

[RVN VET]

72. You nailed it.

This pharmacist has saved not just one little girl, but an entire nation!

[rhett o rick]

75. Yes but on the other hand, she will get "hooked" on the monster spray. The pharmacist isnt no fool.

The next bottle will me more expensive and so on. Betty Ford has a special wing for "monster-spray" addicts.

[ChazII]

68. and if you give monsters cookies then they will

want a glass of milk.

[NuclearDem]

43. Don't worry, there's a safeguard against that.

You can't use a REPEL while the effects of an earlier REPEL still linger.

[greiner3]

58. "This is going to result in an explosion of anti-monster-spray-resistant monsters. "

And the big corps will come in with all of their even bigger ad budgets and soon there will be the 'New and Improved' anti-monster-spray resistant products.

The cost will go from $0 to whatever the market will bear.

[lady lib]

59. Ha ha, that's great!

n/t

[JHB]

4. Does it work on closets?

[SomethingFishy]

8. Wow.. Haven't seen a Bloom County in awhile...

I know people think the comics heyday was Pogo, Peanuts, and Blondie but I'm here to say the 80's and 90's when we got Bloom County, Foxtrot, Zits, and the nothing short of awe inspiring Calvin and Hobbes was the real heyday of the comic strip...

[rwsanders]

18. Berke is still around...

hiding in the children's book section. Check out either "Pete and Pickles" or "Flawed dogs"

[SomethingFishy]

21. He's also in the "Dear Mr Watterson" movie about the Calvin and Hobbes creator

and he's really funny.... Apparently they were friends and Watterson used to harass him about merchandising...

[rwsanders]

83. I didn't know that was out yet, I'm going to have to find it...

my wife bought me the whole Calvin and Hobbes anthology at Costco (3 massive books), but I've never even seen Watterson's face. I did know he hated the idea of marketing his characters.

[SomethingFishy]

84. Came out in November to a limited release..

Not on Disc yet but Amazon has it on demand and I think some cable companies as well..

Fair warning, You don't see him in the movie either. Apparently he's our generations J.D. Salinger.. There is some great stuff in there though...

[CherokeeDem]

27. Couldn't agee more....

Calvin and Hobbes, Bloom Country... my two faves but the others were amazing as well. Don't forget Farside.... love it!

I miss Calvin an Hobbs...

[catbyte]

29. The vanity plate on my car is OOP ACK

[phantom power]

13. I think I *still* have an MX missile in my closet

[KittyWampus]

33. great addition to the thread

[oldandhappy]

7. Nice Person!

Gets my award for the day for humanity and creativity and care. Good job.

[PumpkinAle]

9. Could he concoct an anti-Koch spray?

n/t

[okaawhatever]

14. Yes, but sadly it costs $500 million in campaign donations to the opposing party. nt

[Thor_MN]

61. Any of the numerous Polar Plunges will do that.

Wait, Koch with a K? Oh. Nevermind.

[PumpkinAle]

77. :) n/t

[jwirr]

10. Thanks for the idea. I have a 2 year old greatgrandchild who has monsters in her room.

[Enrique]

11. and it only cost her $85.00

just kidding!

[FSogol]

15. Yeah, but before Obamacare it was $259.

[jtuck004]

20. But now the out-of-pocket is $75 vs the old $5. So there are tradeoffs... n/t

[freebrew]

17. Cool! It comes with a refill.

Just don't let anyone else use it, the DEA will bust you.

[cali]

19. what a lovely guy. and creative too!

[hedgehog]

22. My husband write up a lockout tag for my youngest and posted it on her bed

to keep the monsters away!

[CherokeeDem]

30. That's sweet....

Good daddy...

[JoeyT]

32. That would definitely do the trick for OSHA compliant monsters. n/t

[winter is coming]

73. LOL, we pretended to round them up and put them in an invisible cage,

to be banished to the garage, where the poor monsters would get lots of itchy mosquito bites.

[KamaAina]

23. Is it a generic?

Or is the girl getting ripped off by Big Pharma?

[rurallib]

35. next thing you know, merck will grab it, file a patent

and it will cost a thousand dollars for a small bottle

[Hekate]

42. He's obviously a compounding pharmacist, able to do it to order.

What a great guy.

[cherokeeprogressive]

24. WARNING: May cause drowsiness. n/t

[tclambert]

25. What does the FDA say?

Don't we need double-blind studies to determine effectiveness and potential side effects?

[AnneD]

28. The DEA is working with the FDA.....

what with Easter bearing down on them....

www.peepresearch.org

[ohheckyeah]

66. Somebody somewhere will be allergic to it. n/t

[kracer20]

26. Does this mean that monsters are real?

Last edited Tue Mar 11, 2014, 02:04 PM - Edit history (1)

Will the little girl come to the conclusion that since the doctor gave her this spray, that it proves monsters are real?

Every time my son asks me to close his closet door I close the door and remind him that monsters can probably operate door knobs. I know I should simply close the door and remind that monsters aren't real, but I like to mess with him that way.

[shanti]

36. hah!

i used to do this with my kids. hey, it seemed to work, no monsters

[tridim]

37. An obvious gateway drug...

Alcohol makes monsters go away too, for awhile at least.

[Diclotican]

38. onehandle

onehandle

Dam - I wish I have had something near this - when I was a little kid, with monster under my bed.... (Yeah I know - it is some year ago and I do also know monster doesn't exist - but even then, if you are a kid, you do believe in the imposible)... And I had a monster under my bed, who really did scared me....Specially when I was 3-4 year, the only way to get me to sleep was to take a raid in my fathers truck - I often was going to sleep because of the humming of the engine... And of course next day it was no monster under the bed...

Later I was told to just get in the ***** bed to sleep - monster or no monster.... And after a while the monster was going away - making fuzz with other childrne...

Diclotican

[Jackpine Radical]

55. In Norway, wouldn't those monsters be trolls?

[Diclotican]

67. Jackpine Radical

Last edited Wed Mar 12, 2014, 03:22 AM - Edit history (1)

Jackpine Radical

Yeah - well, a sort of - as trolls come sin many ways - some is in fact rather comical than dangerous - others is less friendly than others... It all depend I guess who they are, and if they are in a faul mood or not, if they are in a good mode, they can be rather good for some - but you should never really trust them, as they could play faul with you - and they was also extremely greedy, always happy after gold... In the wally I was grown up in, we had two "trolls" who in ancient times had have a fight over territory - a hill in the middle of the "fighting area" was created when one of the trolls was trowing a big stone - to hit the other troll - he was not able to trow the whole stone all the way - and as an result - a hill was made... Of course it have a whole different history but for our ancestors it was a way to explain "varingen" as the hill is called (yeah we even have names for the hills in Norway - we are indeed a weird nation. In reality the hill was made when a Vulkan was made in ancient times - 200 mill year ago - when the land was a lot different than it is now. iN fact the area who are now part of Norway and "Oslo-feltet) was 200-400 million year ago - a desert with all the trimmings, and it is even today seen in the bedrock that in the past it have been far dryer and hoter around the Oslo fjord than it is today. And the whole area around the Oslo fjord, are some of the most interesting places to wisit for people who do this type of things - because it exist so many different types of bedrock going back more than 200 mill year - just in one place.. In the summer you can get to know people from all over the world - Japan, China! USA, and so one, who are there just for the bedrock....

And for the record, my older Sister told me that in the attic of my grand parents house - it was a troll, with a tricycle - and in my imagination I do believed he was cycling there in the attic - In fact my sisters effort to not get me up in the attic was so successfully - that when I was a grown man - 25 year old - and was allowed up in the attic - my body kind of "freezes" at the top of the stairs - because in my mind it was still a troll there, who on his bicycle was cycling around.... Of course it was no troll there, in fact it was just a empty room.. But she scared me rather well I suspect...

Diclotican

[Gothmog]

39. This makes me smile

Thank you for posting

[TxDemChem]

40. Wonderful! Genius!

Way to go.

[SoapBox]

41. Excellent

Can he make me an Anti-TeaBagger spray?

I have a great fear of them

[Locrian]

44. wait - repeat as necessary?! wtf?! :)

[N_E_1 for Tennis]

45. I used to have a one man...

carpet cleaning company. One of my clients kids when he was just little, called me "the monster sucker- upper guy". He's in his 20's now and we still laugh about it when we see each other.

[matt819]

46. You do realize, however. . .

that in 21st century America this is as likely as not to get this pharmacist sued. Sad, really.

[Dorian Gray]

47. Hah

Before I had a three year old, I would have said... "He's just perpetuating in her mind that there is monsters! Don't do that!"

But after having a three year old who is continuously insistent that the bugs are going to get her in her bedroom. Every night she insists that I spray her bedroom with bug spray so that they don't crawl all over her when she's sleeping. After weeks of denying that there were going to be bugs, I finally gave in and started spraying. Just one quick little squirt with a water bottle, and she's no longer fearful. Before that? Every night she'd cry and wail out of fear of the bugs.

Some fears are totally irrational and if some placebo gives her peace, then I'm going to go for peace!

[FailureToCommunicate]

74. "Don't worry about that bug, it has no mouth parts" my father used to say, when there was some

scary looking insect on us. He had always been interested in entomology and knew better, but he was wiser in the ways of fatherly comfort for an alarmed kid. His tactic nearly fell apart, though, one night in Tunisia when three of us awoke with giant cockroaches crawling on us: we kids could clearly see their 'mouth parts' inches from our frightened faces!!

Years later, I tried that on my own kids several times, and they just said "Yeah, right, Dad"

[Dorian Gray]

76. Hah!

Though I'd freak if a huge Tunisian cockroach was crawling on me. Aren't they the hissing ones, too? YUCK!

[FailureToCommunicate]

78. I don't recall if those giant roaches DID hiss...we kids were yelling too loud to hear 'em if they

did. (There were LOTS of them too!)

[Dorian Gray]

79. My mom

insists that Palmetto Bugs are NOT roaches! (Going to Florida at Easter, and bracing myself for potential encounters!)

(Um... i have no idea where my daughter gets her fear of bugs from!)

[FailureToCommunicate]

80. My advice is maybe just learn to live with 'em...

[JVS]

48. Is there a $80 copay?

[TRoN33]

49. Priceless!

Nice to know that there is truly compassionate person out there.

[eggplant]

50. Can't they just leave some of these around?

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10024645577

[phil89]

51. Why not just teach him rational thought?

Seems like a weird premise to set.

[JackBoik]

53. Does anyone know if this is a broad-spectrum anti-monster spray and if so,...

how effective is it against repugs and the more deleterious variant, tea baggers?

[phylny]

54. Reminds me of my favorite Gary Larson comic:

[link:|

[bleedinglib]

56. repellent sprays!!

Wonder if i could get a Pepug spray? Large economy size?

[DeSwiss]

57. TOTAL WIN!

- K&R

[Crunchy Frog]

60. More pseudoscientific woo. Shoulda just given her Ambien.

[Cha]

62. Kindness!

[bkanderson76]

63. And Senator McCain just ordered three boxes....damn Putin

[npk]

64. Does it work on republicans?

If it does a case should be good enough to get rid of Ted Cruz.

[Diclotican]

69. npk

npk

Im afraid nothing works on Republicans - they are beyound any medical need whatever small it might be

Diclotican

[treestar]

82. Of course, as they are monsters!

Very scary ones.

[texanwitch]

70. I had the same monster problem when I was little.

My Aunt gave me a magic teddy bear. The bear chased away the monsters. The bear really was magic. The monsters went away. I still have the magic teddy bear.

[gerogie2]

71. Does it work on heartless republicans?

Maybe we could give a few bottles to Democrats in Congress?

[treestar]

81. Oh that's sweet!