My Best Friend is dead...
I thought it was strange.. With the recent earthquake in Los Angeles.. I usually hear from my best friend there, so I sent her a text message. No reply. I sent an email, "you there?". So I figured she was just busy. I had computer problem, so I called her room mate Greg. By the way, I asked.. How is Jamie? She didn't respond to my emails.
"uh, Kimi, Jamie is dead"
"what??" I gasped, "how, why.." I sputtered..
"She died two weeks ago. Had a heart attack and passed in her sleep."
Funeral I asked meekly...
"There was none, she was cremated. She was an atheist so requested no ceremony."
Where were her ashes scattered?
"No idea, her sister did it."
She was only 55. Had been once in top shape with only a few medical problems. I was the one with the heart problems. Why her?
I am in shock right now.. I can't say any more. I don't know how to feel other than shock and sorrow. How is it life is so fragile? I thought this stuff only happened in Japanese drama...
But no, its painfully real.
Tonight I am listening to Japanese drama songs to help me deal with this.
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That really sucks when you miss the chance to say goodbye.
Peace...
I'll bet she lived a beautiful life and left many priceless memories with you and many others.
You have my deepest condolences, I'm sorry for your loss.
So sorry for your loss.
You have my heartfelt condolences. 
I lost my sister (in her 50s) unexpectedly a few years ago. It's very difficult. 
RIP Jamie
So sorry, Kimi
My deepest condolences to you at this terribly wrenching news, sweetie...
I've had several friends die suddenly, without warning, and it is awful.
No chance to say goodbye, to say I love you one more time, to hug or smile or anything.
Of course you're in shock. It IS shocking.
I wish my words could really help you...
Time and your good memories will help.
Be good to yourself...
Wise words from a wise woman.
I respect and care for you as well...
But I don't think she was.
She died in her sleep from a heart attack...what caused it? Well, we don't really know. I was a critical care nurse some years ago, so I may have some ideas here....
Perhaps she had a little clot of fat that dislodged and landed in a critical place in one of the blood vessels of her heart. If that happened, and the place it landed was critical for the blood flow to a major muscle of her heart, then she would have died very quickly...
Those accidents do happen, and there's really almost no way to stop them. Diet and medications can and do help.
I don't know what happened......this is just my hypothesis.
I hope I haven't overstepped my place in offering this.
If I have upset you, please tell me, and I will delete my post here.
It's pretty random, and cardiovascular fitness is in no way shape or form the same as cardiovascular health. Though it can promote health, there are no guarantees.
Anyway what an absolutely horrible way to find out! Take care of yourself.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
I think I speak for most of us on DU when I say if you need anything, even just to talk or a shoulder to cry on, we will be right here for you!
sending cyberhugs your way tonight.
I've reached the age where I'm becoming numb to the shock of losing dear friends, so I can sympathize. It's never easy for any of us.
I know that it is only a symbol, but .
My condolences
if she had something in her will...but best friends never seem to much consideration as loved ones. Oh well. 
I am so sorry to hear this, AsahinaKimi. What a shock! I would be stunned, too, and slack-jawed, and probably just trying hard to gasp for breath.
I'm so sorry you lost your best friend. I'd be lost, too, if mine made the jump to light speed with virtually no warning. It's one thing when your loved one is sick, elderly, and in serious decline. Still hard when the inevitable occurs, but when it's sudden like this - just awful.
Hugging you! She certainly would.
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What a terrible shock for you.
That was a horrible way to find out.
You are in my thoughts.
I've gone through three recent deaths, all within a year, in my family. When you lose someone unexpectedly, it hits like a ton of bricks. Even if they had health problems, unless they are in hospice you just don't expect this. I'm still reeling from my BIL who had a heart attack a year ago. The closer you were, the harder it will be, so gather your friends and family and let them help you through this. I'm sorry you didn't get to participate in whatever your friend's sister did for a "ceremony". It really helps to be with others sharing that experience, it gives you a way to say good bye. Maybe you can come up with some small way to honor your friend in a private memorial for her...something to help you have closure. Wakes are very healing for the survivors. You get together and eat and drink and laugh and share your sorrow in a good way. I'm sorry you were denied that.
Summer Snow is my favorite j-drama, it had a similar sudden outcome you never expected...
your friend would like that.
It's so unexplainable when people so young pass so unexpectedly. It's like a punch in the gut and you're just stunned. Those of us who have experienced it completely understand.
LTH
for your loss.
I know how tough it is.
My best friend died 7 years ago from ovarian cancer. She was 51. I think of her everyday.
She once told me, "Jerry (her husband) has my heart; you have my soul."
I am really sorry that you had to find out this way. I am grateful I had a chance to say good bye. Not to have had that would have been very painful.
... so it should be treated with care. You will get over the shock, but the loss will stay with you, which is as it should be. She'll live in your memories.
-- Mal
We share a very deep sorrow. My youngest son who was only 29, also recently died in his sleep from a heart attack. I understand completely your shock and disbelief over the loss of your friend.
We recently learned my son reached out for medical help when he experienced chest pains and a numb left arm, several months before he died. The hospital, and subsequently his regular doctor, dropped the ball and didn't perform the necessary tests that would have revealed he had an enlarged heart and needed treatment. He became a part of the gross statistic in this country where nearly 100,000 Americans die each year due to medical negligence. I will be posting his story soon in the hopes it will raise awareness.
Much peace to you and realize it is only time that will heal your pain. If you need an understanding ear, I am here for you.
Take good care.
So very sorry.
Reach out to friends...here and in real life. Keep them close. After the shock wears off, you'll need extra loving care on the emotional rollercoaster.
Friends grow far and few between. Its funny, In High school you may have many friends.. later in college not as many. When you get out into the working field, not as many.. when you retire they all seem to be gone, except for a sprinkle of friends. Most of my friends are on the internet..many too far away, in places like Taiwan, and Hong Kong. Those virtual hugs are all I can rely on these days.. I will be contacting a therapist, soon. They can be helpful with my grief counseling..I am sure I will need it
I've been working on doing the same....I also see a therapist. I've had many over the years; she's the best .... so please, look online on "how to find a good therapist", or even ask your Dr. for recommendations. A good therapist should not only listen and validate your grief, but give you "homework", healthier behaviors to practice, suggestions for developing friendships. If after a bit, you feel it's not a good fit or you're not getting what you need, then definitely look for someone else.
There are no words to assuage your pain, but remember that you'll always have the love and respect that you shared with you friend. That's what helps me everyday to get through the loss of my mother.
RIP
I lost a long-time friend a year ago. Even though she'd struggled with a myriad of obesity-related health problems for years, I was completely in denial that she would actually die so young. Those James Taylor lyrics kept going through my head: "But I always thought that I'd see you again."
The shock can really knock you off your feet. Please be good to yourself for the next few weeks.
It's toughest right now. One thing that does help is to write about it. Write more details about your friend, your times together, and so forth. Blog it, journal it, speak it, however you get it out, even if just privately. Expressing helps you process it.
Take care.
I hope you have friends and family you can talk to & be with.
So sorry for your loss. I had a very close friend die in her sleep from heart issues. She worked with another close friend, who called her landlord to check on her since she didn't arrive to work that morning. It was a shock to all of us and I know what you are going through.
Condolences to you, her friends and family. May you find peace in her memory.
So sorry for the loss of your best friend.
Take good care of kimi, okay?
It is hard to accept when someone is gone when you never had the opportunity to say goodbye. Do it for yourself and make time to say goodbye to your friend.
for your loss and the way you had to find out about it.
I hope you can find peace during this time.
Enjoy the music and the memories of your friend, your good times. That is where she is still alive, in that resonance. I've found that anger or grief diminished that in my case. I wish vibes from her to you, if that makes any sense.
What a sad shock.
that you have every right to feel.
I always listen to music when I am holding on or letting go and just gliding through.
If you get a chance could you share a Japanese drama song here.
Tikki
Oh my dear friend this is shocking news. I wonder if I ever met this friend of yours? Come by later if you are up for hugs, and coffee.