This message was self-deleted by its author

[CaliforniaPeggy]

This message was self-deleted by its author (CaliforniaPeggy) on Mon Jun 9, 2014, 11:17 PM. When the original post in a discussion thread is self-deleted, the entire discussion thread is automatically locked so new replies cannot be posted.

[Ilsa]

1. Have a safe trip home!

So wonderful of you to visit our guy and keep us posted. Blessings to all of you!

[CaliforniaPeggy]

2. Thanks, my dear Ilsa!

I am home already...

Got in about 3:45 PM local time.

It feels good to be home.

But it was a great trip, and I'm so glad I went.

[OrwellwasRight]

3. +1

[frogmarch]

4. You're a wonderful friend to have, Peggy.

Everyone should be so lucky to have a friend like you.

Have a safe and pleasant trip home!

[CaliforniaPeggy]

5. Thank you so much, my dear frogmarch...

I appreciate your kind words so much!

And I am already home...got home late this afternoon.

It's good to be here.

[malaise]

6. +1,000

Thanks my dear California Peggy

[CaliforniaPeggy]

7. ...

[spanone]

8. k&r... beauty abounds....

[nadinbrzezinski]

9. Peggy you are an angel

I mean it

[Hepburn]

41. Ditto that for me, too! n/t

[longship]

10. Let's never forget. DUers take care of each other.

Thank you, CaliforniaPeggy, for your dedication to the cause, and for showing all of us what DU is all about... in so many ways.

[Spitfire of ATJ]

11. That's really sweet of you.

[Omaha Steve]

12. For the DUgooder you are

K&R.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

20. Aw...my dear Omaha Steve...

I'd forgotten that song, and listening to it just made me cry and feel happy all at the same time!

Thank you...

[NCarolinawoman]

13. Thank you, Peggy.

Thank you.

[WillyT]

14. Thank You Peggy !!! - K & R !!!

[calimary]

15. So cool that you did that!

You really are a great friend!

[defacto7]

16. You're very special CP.

My prayer to humanity this evening is that we all could have your generosity.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

17. Thank you, my dear defacto7...

I really feel that the reason I am so generous is because of love.

When you truly love someone, you respect them and then there are no barriers (or very few) to what you are willing to do.

[kag]

18. Peggy, I'm so glad you got to go, and I'm sure...

that you provided WCGreen some much-needed sunshine and distraction. What a generous gesture to make that trip, but I would expect nothing less from you, CP, who seem to have a place in your very big heart for all of us.

[HCE SuiGeneris]

19. An angel on earth you are, Peggy.

So lucky to know you... even at an 'online' distance.

Be well.

[BlancheSplanchnik]

21. that's a beautiful picture.

He must be a very cool guy to have become close friends with you through the innertooobz.


my wish is that everyone could have a friend like you.

I'll do my best to follow your example! (be what you admire in others, right? Right!!)

[retrogal]

22. Such a beautiful picture...

You are a special person Peggy!

[Liberal_in_LA]

23. k&r

[Hekate]

24. Blessings and safe journey to you all, Peggy

[SoapBox]

25. Wow...

Not only for being a good soul but now we have faces to go with the faceless, cold internet!

Wowsa!

[countryjake]

26. You're a beautiful person, CaliforniaPeggy!

Inside and out!

Thanks for sharing with us all.

[Uncle Joe]

27. Kicked and recommended.

Thanks for the update, CaliforniaPeggy.

[riqster]

28. Kick for kindness.

[gademocrat7]

29. Thank you, Peggy.

You are a truly compassionate and caring person.

[spooky3]

30. Heartwarming. Thank you.

[Demo_Chris]

31. There are GOOD people here, but your name might well top the list. nt

[Solly Mack]

32. K&R

(((to you both)))

[CaliforniaPeggy]

33. Thank you, everybody, for your loving and tender replies...

It was such a great week, and I'm so glad I went.

My memories will sustain me now.

[niyad]

34. good morning, peggy. thank you so much for being the wonderful, kind, caring person

you are. and thank you for keeping us updated on chris. get some rest now.

[randome]

35. You look very much like someone at my local Trader Joe's. Any relatives in St. Louis?

[hr][font color="blue"][center]I'm always right. When I'm wrong I admit it.
So then I'm right about being wrong.[/center][/font][hr]

[CaliforniaPeggy]

36. Not as far as I know, my dear randome!

Of course, you know what they say........we're all related!

[rhett o rick]

37. Great picture. Thanks for sharing. Thanks for you kindness. nm

[LoisB]

38. Wonderful picture. The best to you both.

[blm]

39. Appreciating both of you dear people.

(( ))

[PumpkinAle]

40. Safe travels

and hugs and thank you for being such a good friend to Chris and all of us on DU.

[BeachBaby]

42. I've tried to keep my thoughts to myself on what I see here, CP....

but I can't.

I have worked in home healthcare, and hospice, for almost four years now. I'm trying to remember how many people have passed away, on my watch. I believe that there have been nine, now.

None - NOT ONE - has been a big party. Granted, people came and went, saying goodbyes, and sometimes having a few laughs to make the patient feel better - but, there were never cameras around. There wasn't the posing for photos of the happy, smiling person, next to the person who is mentally dealing with the reality that each breath could be their last. What the hell is there to be happy about? There is no happiness in the death of a person who lost a fight, and is dying, way too young.

I have been friends with Chris on Facebook, for several years. He included me with several other of his FB friends, in a group that apprised us of any of his update blog/notes on his physical health. None of his notes were filled with happiness. He was fighting the fight of his life, and we all watched, fingers crossed.

It seems that he is losing his battle, and honestly? It sickens me to see him, in this condition, broadcast on the internet for the world to see. His last moments are to be as peaceful, as comfortable, as PRIVATE, as possible. What you did, here, is against EVERYTHING I was taught in hospice care.

You could have easily posted about your visit with Chris, without the photos; but, you chose to sensationalize his illness and impending death with photographic evidence. It's cruel, it's unfeeling, it's lacking empathy.....it's SICK.

His wife is a gem for putting up with any of this. I don't believe in a god, or in sainthood, for that matter - but, if it does exist, she should be canonized for tolerating such madness.

Love to Chris.

[senseandsensibility]

43. Don't you think CP got the patient's permission

before posting pics, and talked to him about how he felt about it? If I recall correctly, she is a former nurse herself. The points you made could have been raised in a PM.

[helderheid]

45. It all could have been handled privately - especially the pictures of a dying man.

Instead his last moments are plastered across the internet for all to see.

[Lionel Mandrake]

46. You recall correctly,

and yes, the pictures are okay with Chris. Since he doesn't mind, neither should anyone else.

[XemaSab]

47. His wife doesn't mind?

[Lionel Mandrake]

50. Far from it.

She and Chris both approve of the pictures.

[helderheid]

48. Ghoulish.

[helderheid]

44. This

A thousand times, this.

[Jesus Malverde]

51. The picture is rather strange.

I don't think any of us would want to be plastered on the internet in our most vulnerable moments. Especially considering the vitriol spewed at DUers from other sites.

The contrasts in expressions speaks to me about the dynamic at work. A pained expression contrasted by exuberant familiarity.

Seems like if he had wanted to post a picture like that, he would have done it himself.

I find some of the laudatory replies towards the OP equally as strange.

This seems less about the sick man and more about the healthy smiling woman.

While strange, it's not surprising in this "look at me" social media era.



Sometimes the most powerful actions are done anonymously, quietly and in tune with the moment.

[Whoa_Nelly]

49. Truth?

For those who do know Peggy's real relationship with Chris, she made damn sure she took the spotlight, all but said that he is her star-crossed lover, and most egregiously, stole his dignity as he lies dying.
Yeah, she "shared" her visit with DU, but it was more about her, than Chris.

One of my dear friends died recently, and I went to help take care of him as he suffered through his last days, cancer robbing him of the longer life he hoped to have. He asked for pictures of family and friends to be taken with him as he lay dying. I obliged him because he asked. Yet, I would not dream of posting those anywhere, and am keeping them until someday, if it happens at all, that his grieving wife (yeah..a real wife) asks for them. Until then, I gave him the moment he wanted in being with his friends one last time.

“Where is there dignity unless there is honesty?” ~ Cicero

Honesty is something Peggy will never understand, much less, dignity.

I wish Chris a gentle time now and through whatever it is one passes through onto that next plane.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

52. 0. Today I went home to California, but not before we got a picture of the two of us...

I just talked to his nurse tonight, and Chris had a quiet, good day where he slept a lot. He was in a good mood when I was there this morning before I caught my flight...