Message auto-removed

[Name removed]

[Le Taz Hot]

1. Talk about your First World Problems.

[Le Taz Hot]

3. You have no idea what's about to happen, do you?

I'd self-delete. Quick.

[Le Taz Hot]

6. OK, I'll stop responding.

I live to serve.

[Warpy]

11. OK, here's a serious reply: try being a server.

It's quite an education. Most of what you will learn is that having a picky customer like you is something no amount of money will compensate for.

[Codeine]

55. As you sound like a spoiled brat. A monster. nt

[hlthe2b]

58. Gee, Warpy... No TIp for YOU!

[alcibiades_mystery]

61. Ha!

LAZY!!!!!

[NightWatcher]

13. "you have no idea what's about to happen, do you?"

I almost spewed my beer all over my laptop.

This is going to be an epic thread that is talked about often.

[Le Taz Hot]

16. I'm sorely tempted to alert the Lounge.

I'm making popcorn.

[NightWatcher]

18. done...

[cali]

45. alert them. they shouldn't miss out on this.

[Arkansas Granny]

49. You and me both.

[Arkansas Granny]

37. You post a 40 page diatribe about restaurant service and

you want serious replies only? Good luck with that.

[hlthe2b]

33. Indeed... I could take a list of a dozen or so pet peeves, but I think the list would be shorter if.

the OP simply stated the few things they DID perceive as acceptable. Heaven help the waiter/waitress who gets their table...

[hlthe2b]

51. Clearly you've got one enormous chip on your shoulder... I pity anyone who tries to please you...

I hope that attitude doesn't extend to those with whom you share the road. Sounds like a recipe for an angry aggressive driver.

[PasadenaTrudy]

4. Children and babies....

They should be seen and not heard! Especially in $$$ restaurants. Leave 'em home, folks.

[PasadenaTrudy]

23. They always start screaming

Never fails. I'm glad some restaurants are starting to not allow kids.

[Warpy]

27. Those are two career yuppies

who refuse to learn how to cook and make enough to eat at good restaurants, kiddies in tow.

$$$ restaurants would do well to have divided areas, one for the family that needs to eat and one for people who came to dine.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

8. Wow. Maybe you should just eat at home.

46 complaints? I can't think of that many complaints about anything in my life.

Ever been a waiter/waitress?

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

20. And now here you are, complaining about the minor transgressions

of minimum-wage workers....

[NightWatcher]

9. Holy shit, this is quite the manifesto.

It sounds like you should prepare all of your own meals at home, because it sounds like anything shy of perfection pisses you off.

[cali]

29. I must say, I've never seen anything quite like this.

it's nutty.

[arcane1]

10. Customers with an inflated sense of entitlement are my worst restaurant peeve.

They affect everyone else, including the staff, negatively, and make the dining experience unbearable.

[DrDan]

43. there ya go . . . thanks! (was thinking the same thing)

[uppityperson]

12. Why are you posting this? This is a serious question, what is your purpose in posting this?

you do not seem to appreciate people replying, so I am wondering what is your reason for this? Thanks.

[uppityperson]

22. Why are you posting this? What is your purpose in posting this?

You do not seem to appreciate people replying, so I am wondering what is your reason for posting this? Thanks.

[cyberswede]

46. "I don't seem to be having those replies that I want."

Well, this is a discussion board - you don't really get to dictate what sort of replies you get.

[Le Taz Hot]

73. I tried to warn him/her in Post #3

but did he/she listen? Noooooooo.

[StopTheNeoCons]

15. This thread is a joke, right?...nt

[Electric Monk]

30. I'm LMAO whether that was the intent of not

[cali]

21. Eat at home. You're a server's nightmare.

Just holy shit.

[Phentex]

53. Buh bye! Oh, and here's yer tip!

You get PIZZA!

[arcane1]

57. Name-calling is not nice. Please be civil here, DU is not a restaurant.

[hlthe2b]

62. and the countdown begins...

Hurry, DUers.... while we've still got a "live" one.

[cali]

63. bwahahahaha. you're done, charming little nutwad.

go away you little blowfly. No one wants YOU here. Got it?

good.

[cyberswede]

67. You don't know anything about cali.

That takes some nerve.

Oh wait...I bet I know why you posted this OP.

[BlueJazz]

25. I've always wondered how food servers remember hardly anything. I've seem some that can...

...take care of 10 tables at a time and "do everything right".
I can get up from my chair during a commercial...go into the kitchen...and forget what the heck I wanted.

[Electric Monk]

40. "READING YOUR WRITTEN********* ORDER YOU STUPID LAZY ASS IDIOT"

Your cool is losing you...

[Codeine]

70. Wow. I'm starting to believe you're not

joking here. What a nightmare you must be irl.

[cyberswede]

26. Huh. When we go out to eat, it's to relax & have fun...

therefore, I don't even know if I've ever encountered anything like you describe...we just go with the flow. It seems like you don't even like going out to eat - why do you bother if it's such a hardship?

Relax, enjoy your food, and don't sweat the small stuff.

[arcane1]

47. Same here. If any of this stuff ever happened, it wasn't worth writing or remembering.

I couldn't come up with that many complaints if I was trying my best and being paid to do it!

[Journeyman]

28. Before this proceeds too far, tell us what work you do, so others can compile their manifesto. . .

against your particular corner of the universe.

[DrDan]

35. wow - that's quite a list - do they do anything correct in your opinion?

I guess I prefer to just relax and look for the positives than build up such a distaste for these folks

to each his own . . .

I think you would be well-advised to never send anything back to the kitchen - you might not appreciate the results (if you were to somehow become aware)

[alcibiades_mystery]

36. I skimmed through about 30 of these and I've decided

That my ignore list is too short by one. Good luck enjoying your next meal out.

Yeesh.

[Phentex]

39. You have given me a new restaurant concept!

The Psychic Garden..We Know What You Want Before You Know What You Want....free bread sticks!

Seriously, you should not eat out. You cannot be pleased.

[alphafemale]

41. Do you often sit and wonder why you don't get invited to parties?

Re-read what you posted.

You are a classic, American, self-centered, unlikable pain in the ASS.

Good lord.

Please read what she wrote if this is alerted.

She deserves every one of those adjectives.

[NightWatcher]

54. Stop it, you're killing me.

No one better alert on anything in this thread. Keep it going!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

[yeoman6987]

42. What a nightmare you would be to serve

Stay home! That poor staff doesn't have a chance. And you probably deduct the tip on every "supposed" discrepancy. I bet they run for the hills when you walk in.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

48. For another view, look here:

http://www.servernotservant.com/the-book/customer-hall-of-shame/

A whole web site devoted to the pet peeves of servers (who are not servants) who have to put up with rude, entitled customers for minimum wage and crappy tips.

[Codeine]

50. You sound like a completely horrible human being.

Please stay home to eat because no server deserves to deal with the horrorshow you clearly bring to the table.

[OhioChick]

52. Perhaps you should just eat in n/t

[tammywammy]

56. I eat out all the time

I don't have these problems, but then I'm not a self-absorbed jerk. This list is freaking ridiculous.

[Phentex]

71. You skipped my reply??????????

I would like a reply before you get pizza. Thank you.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

66. Me, too.

Once in awhile a server makes a mistake with an order, and once in awhile the service is slow, but I don't get my undies in a bunch about it. I couldn't think of 46 complaints about restaurant service if I tried, and if I found it that awful I wouldn't eat out.

[Cleita]

59. Maybe you should cook your own meals at home because no one is

going to be able to satisfy you. Much of what you are complaining about are policies from management not the server. Considering servers are waiting on several other tables than yours they don't remember everything an individual asked for so sometimes must ask questions. I doubt if you could do better.

As a former server myself, I can almost tell that you don't leave tips so are trying to justify your actions.

Next time you are dissatisfied take it up with the management. If they agree that you have a LEGITIMATE gripe, you might get a free meal.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

64. Well, it's about time

I've been saying for a long time someone needs to stick it to food servers here on DU.

Now let's get on those retail serfs. "DO YOU WORK HERE?????"

[ProdigalJunkMail]

65. sounds like you've got a pretty comprehensive list

of total bullshit. people aren't perfect... neither are you. you don't like the way they're doing their job you can talk with them about it and you have a right to raise objections but if you are bothered by all of these things, i think it would be best for you to stay in and not go out to eat... this list is bordering on a psychosis.

sP

[CBGLuthier]

68. Some folks just look for reasons to be unhappy and pissed off about everything.

Dear god so much effort for exactly zero results. imagine if someone put that much effort into writing a novel or trying to make a real difference in something that actually mattered instead of whining about the smallest tiniest little things.

I look forward to the dissertations on the sins of librarians, taxi drivers, movie theater ushers, and whoever else has the sad misfortune to interact with the author.

[KT2000]

69. You do understand that

you are not the center of their universe, right? They are tending to the "needs" of several tables, the kitchen and management.

I am still wondering if this post is really a joke. If not, maybe you should limit yourself to 4 start restaurants where they might give a crap about these silly complaints.

[Earth_First]

72. Methinks that you change these standards often...

...one day you feel one way about a certain standard only to have the complete opposite desire on another given day just for the sake of being right.