An all-American ass-whoopin’ - By Mark Morford

[madokie]

America! You know what you need? Besides better bourbon, less Jesus and fewer conservatives? That’s right: A good whoopin’. A serious spanking. Maybe even one of those terrifying, NFL-grade spankings so vicious it raises welts and yelps and not a little blood, all administered with a belt, or a tree branch, or the backhand of wrathful ol’ Almighty himself.

But don’t worry! It’s all out of love. Isn’t it always?

Besides! Americans love spankings. We relish inducing fear, pain, smacking each other around to impart some sort of life lesson. Especially foreigners, or gays, or women, or dogs or nature or, well, pretty much anything we can get away with, really.

But the creature we love to hit most of all? Those small, defenseless humans, the ones who weigh less than 50 pounds and have barely learned to walk or form complete sentences, much less understand that smacking each other out of some warped concept of “love” is, you know, just what we do.

http://blog.sfgate.com/morford/2014/09/16/an-all-american-ass-whoopin/

[Coventina]

1. On target, but will be ignored by the spankers.

They think it's just A-OK to hit children, because "it works."

And "pain is an effective tool."