open letter to Brian Lederman from the woman he groped

[Liberal_in_LA]

Last edited Sat Sep 20, 2014, 02:58 PM - Edit history (1)

http://www.alternet.org/woman-writes-epic-open-letter-hedge-fund-bro-who-allegedly-groped-her

Dear Brian,

You came into the restaurant where I work and ordered a Stoli on the rocks. When I asked you and your companion if you’d be eating, or needing anything else from me, you put your hand – ever so gently – ON MY ASS and asked if you could take me “to go”. When I immediately stepped away and said “Sorry, what?” you probably gathered that I was and am not receptive of such advances from customers. We were in a family-friendly restaurant, around 6:30pm, and I was wearing a loose-fitting, long sleeve shirt, jeans, and no makeup…so I’m not sure where the confusion arose as to what kind of service you were being provided. You left soon after, leaving a signed credit card slip and a two dollar tip (see picture included!). Your name is Brian Lederman. I found you, instantly, via a quick Google search online. I looked at your face on Linked In, the World’s Largest Professional Network. You work at Swiss Performance Management and Truehand AG, in Investment Management. Of course you do.



I work as a bartender, and have for more than five years now. I graduated NYU with honors, and have at some point held down every conceivable part time type job including but not limited to food service, administration, and even temp work at firms such as yours. So far, bartending allows me the most flexibility to pursue my artistic career, while comfortably covering my basic living expenses, including my outrageously high student loan payments. I have a good job that I’m grateful for. The environment is low key, I have incredibly supportive coworkers and managers, and – in general – the clientele is nice.

But I still hate being a bartender. Over the years my knowledge and skill set have expanded, but I seem to be getting worse at tolerating the “service” part. I deal with incredible amounts of entitlement, condescension, and drunk nonsense. And at a bar, it is impossible to ignore the fact that misogyny is alive and well. I can’t tell you how many times people have treated me horribly and I’ve memorized or photographed the names from their credit cards, fantasizing about internet revenge. But every time I’ve been tempted in the past (even after verbal attacks, physical affronts, or sexual harassment) I’ve stopped myself and let it go.

So congratulations, Brian! You’ve done it! You broke this tired ass camel’s back. And though this is obviously a public shaming, I truly don’t mean this as an attack. Maybe – just maybe – via the intimately connected internet world, my post will reach you, and you’ll learn something about how hurtful and upsetting a small comment or gesture might be. Or at the very least, maybe a Facebook passerby will read this and more deeply consider how they treat women, how they treat servers, and/or how they treat other people in general. And thank you. Without your inspiration I wouldn’t be quitting my job today, and endeavoring a better chapter of my life.

[Liberal_in_LA]

1. Lederman's response rrom the same article

“I clearly remember making a joke when the girl said, ‘What would you like,’ ” he said. “I kiddingly said, ‘I would like you to go with nothing on it.’ ”

He said he was furious that she claimed he did more than spew sleaze.

“That f–king c–t, for her to do something like that is pretty ridiculous,” he told The Post.

He then threatened to make sure she doesn’t serve lunch in this town again.

“I will make sure she doesn’t get another job in New York City. I know everybody,” he raged. “The bar owners, the club owners — that’s a terrible thing to write about somebody.”

[Ken Burch]

2. UH, Brian, if you're trying to prove you're not the sort of guy who'd grope random women

Last edited Sat Sep 20, 2014, 03:12 AM - Edit history (1)

calling them "f-king c--t(s)" might NOT be the best strategy.

Just a thought, "bro".



Also, it's not as though just saying "I'd like you to go WITH NOTHING ON IT" to female strangers is cool, either.

'k?

[Ken Burch]

3. BTW, the link you provided doesn't seem to have the article there.

Found one that works, though:

http://www.alternet.org/woman-writes-epic-open-letter-hedge-fund-bro-who-allegedly-groped-her

[Liberal_in_LA]

15. thx

[NYC_SKP]

5. Your link didn't work so I found out why, and here's the link:

http://www.alternet.org/woman-writes-epic-open-letter-hedge-fund-bro-who-allegedly-groped-her

You need to hit return before going into the letter salutation "Dear Brian"

K/R

[Liberal_in_LA]

14. fixed. thx

[Ilsa]

12. Denial, extreme hostility, then threats.

Yeah, we all believe your shit now, Brian, you sociopath.

[YoungDemCA]

17. What an entitled, narcissistic piece of shit

And he makes a lot of money and is well-connected, too. Go figure.

[Ken Burch]

4. Brian doesn't exactly help himself HERE:

http://www.totpi.com/brian-lederman-hedge-funders-defense-grope-case-always-grab-women.html

(notice how he makes sure to include his chest hair in the shot, too.)

Anyone want to start a pool about how soon this ends up on LAW AND ORDER:SVU?

[mackerel]

6. He looks like he has a wedding ring on in the pick.

Typical narcissist.

[Ken Burch]

9. A MARRIED groping narcissist.

Even better.

[mackerel]

20. If he really used the "C" word he's only proving her point.

[steve2470]

7. I hope Brian gets the justice he richly deserves, namely...

a swift kick in the balls from his wife and a refusal by other female servers to deal with him. Asshole.

[Ken Burch]

10. WHAT balls? n/t.

[Helen Borg]

8. It's like in the feudal times...

When the local degenerate nobleperson would ride through the village and pick a girl for entertainment... You did well to speak up.

[NealK]

11. K&R

[mythology]

13. If true, what a boorish ass

But if what the NY Post reported him as saying is true (it isn't exactly a paper I regard highly), wow, way to keep digging that hole deeper dumbass.

[Liberal_in_LA]

16. he admits that he's an ass grabber

[YoungDemCA]

18. More of these misgonyistic creeps need to be taken down a peg

Particularly those in power.

K&R for the woman's courage.

[hifiguy]

19. So the guy is not only a pig,

he leaves just a two dollar tip?? The term that pops into my mind is "flaming shitheel."