If a woman is hitting me....I still won't hit her.

[trumad]

And when I mean hit her...I mean with a open hand or fist.

I'll either fend off her blows, hold her with my arms until she stopped....or ...simply get the hell out of dodge.

I can't think of any circumstances where I would hit a woman.

Nuff said.

[Recursion]

1. I don't know. I would hit anyone who hit me first.

[DemocratSinceBirth]

6. IMHO, you should use only such force as is necessary to protect yourself as you retreat./NT

[Recursion]

7. Maybe I'm unromantic

If someone starts hitting me I don't parse their capabilities or purpose.

[BlueCaliDem]

257. That's pretty much my first impulse, too. Then I get that flash of rationality and get out of dodge

as fast as my feet can take me. However, should I be slammed down to the ground, I will certainly do what I can to defend myself - and I'm quite capable of doing that - and then run out the other way as fast as I can.

[giftedgirl77]

2. As I have taught my son's & has always been my rule as

I'm a fighter by nature. If a female hits u like a dude then she damn well better expect to get hit back like one.

Now if she is just flailing her arms around and trying to slap then subdue her but if she straight up decks you like a man, well then it's on.

[trumad]

4. Nope....

If a woman gets a good one in on me...I'm still not going to hit her.

Nope... I would rather run than punch a woman.

[randome]

8. And if you can't run?

[hr][font color="blue"][center]All things in moderation, including moderation.[/center][/font][hr]

[trumad]

15. Well why can't you?

[randome]

17. Close quarters.

Another perspective: what if a woman is beating up your son or daughter or someone close to you?
[hr][font color="blue"][center]All things in moderation, including moderation.[/center][/font][hr]

[trumad]

19. I would get my son and daughter out of there...

Look..If you are going to throw....what if she has a gun...or what if she has her finger on a nuclear bomb...type scenarios. .. well ya got me.

I'm talking normal domestic type shit.

[joeglow3]

104. Normal domestic type shit involves trapping people in close quarters

It is not like these take place in a wide open field.

[giftedgirl77]

10. What if she just starts wailing on you & doesn't stop?

I'm a trained fighter & can handle my own in most situations against both males & females, I find it hilarious that because I have breasts a guy would be afraid to hit me even though I could seriously harm them.

[Jackpine Radical]

76. I wouldn't hit either, unless I saw no other way to protect myself.

For one thing, in any case where a male and female have behaved aggressively against each other, the prima facie assumption is that the male is the aggressor, and if the cops intervene, the man has a much greater likelihood of being arrested and ultimately convicted of abuse.

I will add that i wouldn't fight a male either, if I had a reasonable way to get away from him. I've never been in a serious fight. (Well, not counting military combat.)

[edgineered]

228. Most guys don't think women like you exist.

At the first sign, the slightest twitch or giveaway is going to yield three results: offense, defense, or ignore. As a trained fighter your reaction has most likely been determined before the giveaway. Generally a skilled fighter has no desire to hurt anyone and won't make the mistake of signalling. Should the skilled fighter feel the danger or get the signal the sex of the aggressor makes no difference, and being skilled goes to offense, unless the aggressor is pretty quick. I haven't hit a women because of all the women who have ranted, raved, and raged at me none were real fighters and it was either defense or retreat.

With that being said I would like to add that most men can't fight better than a woman anyway. In most cases a fight involves two stupid people.

[Xyzse]

256. I've met girls like you.

I am very very respectful, and since I know I can't fight back, I would either run or beg for forgiveness.

Close quarters, I'd be in a world of hurt.

Also, trained fighters train for endurance, not just short bursts... I do 15Ks but chances are, I don't get any of that help.
Doing the Tiger Woods (getting in a car, and driving off) would probably be the only way I could save myself.

Either way, the more obstacles I could place in between me and a person, the better.
Chair here, table there, wall partition, another person. Yeah... human shield.

[giftedgirl77]

297. I don't fight unless I have to.

I got all of that out of my system a long time ago. But I can & will if necessary. I think it's stupid for a guy to think he has to cower in the corner because he's getting his ass kicked by a female.

[Xyzse]

298. Well, for someone like me, it was ingrained from a young age.

Thankfully it hasn't really happened. Even fights with other guys, as long as I can put barriers and distance, it helps quite a bit.
I am not that big, so someone gets a hold of me, I could easily get thrown.

I don't see something like that happening with me to begin with. I try not to cause any incident where someone would wish to punch me.

Still, there is that parlor trick, that I learned to do though that I've felt bad for doing when I was younger.
I remember someone punching, and I moved forwards quickly and let them hit a hard area in my body, so that it intercepts their punch, at a shorter distance and hopefully faster pace than they are expecting(usually that is either my palm, the muscle of my upper arm)
It hurts them instead, and it is usually unexpected that it stops things from getting more violent.

[giftedgirl77]

306. I've always taught my kids that you don't swing first

regardless of gender but do what you must to finish it. It took me many, many years to learn how to deal with issues other than with a confrontation.

[Xyzse]

310. That's a good way to go about it.

I've never swung first, but I do end things.

Of course I generally never confront, since more often than not, most things are not a big deal.

[giftedgirl77]

313. Yeah, I've learned that with age.

[trumad]

12. Oh Pinto

You are consistent I have to say that. You claiming something is a sexist claptrap is about the most hilarious comment I've ever seen on this forum.

[trumad]

23. Only little boys I remember are the MRA gang

That fester here at DU.

I say I wouldn't punch a woman with a fist and you object t to that. You call that sexist claptrap.

That's some weird shit dude.

[trumad]

27. look..I say I wouldn't punch a woman with a fist

You call my comment sexist claptrap.

Again. ..that's some weird shit.

[joeglow3]

109. Would you punch a man with a closed fist?

If yes, why the distinction.

[trumad]

113. I really have to explain the distinction?

I'm laughing my ass off at all the dudes in this thread advocating that it is perfectly fine to hit a woman with a closed fist.

[seabeyond]

214. it wasnt healthy for me to walk into this thread. my eyes kinda opened in surprise, at that one. nt

[joeglow3]

235. Quit the bullshit

If I came in here and said women should be precluded from many physical labor professions, including the military, you would pounce. Why? Because you, Trumad, and many others would point out (rightly so), that many women can meet the requirements of the job.

And yet, when discussing this topic, you like to portray all women and weak and helpless. You warp your logic to fit whatever bullshit view you need to support.

Personally, I have two female friends who are huge into lifting weights and could kick the ass of 95% of the men I know. It is amazing how you will trumpet that individual when discussing career options for women, but then are ashamed of her and try to hide her in a thread like this.

You and Trumad can take your fake surprise and peddle it elsewhere.

[seabeyond]

237. quit the bullshit on expressing my experience reading your post? you are telling me

to quit the bullshit, for merely expressing my experience.

no

fuck that shit

[joeglow3]

239. Quit the bullshit logic you fail at employing

There is no consistency in how you analyze facts and form conclusions. It is CRYSTAL clear you form opinions and then warp or ignore facts to fit your conclusions. You are intellectually dishonest. But not only that, you take your dishonesty and use it to smear and bully others. In short: QUIT YOUR BULLSHIT!!!

[seabeyond]

246. Omg... Lmfao. I am so tired of you posters continually taking it to

A rant of fabricated accusations with no need what so ever to document. You sure got a lot of insults in just a few sentences.

I read you post. I had a reaction to what you wrote. I expressed. How I felt...

And you proceeding to simply insult with no need for accurecy.

[joeglow3]

247. You responded with faux outrage that would have done Fox News proud

While offering NOTHING substantive beyond bullying and implied accusations. You are not interested in having a conversation. You are not interested in explaining you views. You are ONLY interesting in applying the bullshit tactic of trying to label someone as something horrible, thereby discrediting anything they say and then being able to claim victory without ever having to explain your hypocrisy. In short: QUIT THE BULLSHIT.

[seabeyond]

266. at least here i can actually address your accusations. first. 1. faux outrage? you accuse.

what i did was read your post, and think, huh.... the answer is not obvious? see below in this subthread. i responded with a comment to trumad, expanding on my thoughts. kinda like i, a grown strong woman, does not close my fist and hit a small child.

that was my faux outrage, per you.

i think that is an inaccurate assessment. i stated why.

2.

While offering NOTHING substantive beyond bullying and implied accusations.

the substance is that i get so tired of the obvious ignore. like, why a big ole man is not gonna hit a little woman. like, how i, as a strong woman, am not gonna hit a child. (other than, i am nonvioent).

expressing my opinion is NOT being a bully. it is a differing opinion. there is NO accustion in my comment. merely MY opinion.

3. this is a conversation. you finally give me actual substance to work with. so, again, you would be wrong. i often have conversation.

4. and yet. i started with an explanation of my views, to trumad, who has the same position, so he knew what i was saying.

then later, further explained my views with the example of being a grown, strong woman not closing my fist and hitting a child.

then putting the time in to respnd to you, right now, explainging my views. see how time consuming this has become, addressing your post full of incorrect accusations. hence why, i often by pass the opportunity to waste my time in this manner.

5. wow, the long run on accusations thru out, .... i would have to start
1a
b
c.

ok. whatever.

you exhausted me.

[joeglow3]

269. And I clearly stated it is sexist to assume ALL women are weaker to ALL men

Are you saying all women are to men what all children are to women?

And FYI, Trumad is the one who attempted rationalize Hope Solo assaulting a child.

[seabeyond]

270. "Are you saying"... no. you are saying that. quit.

i do not even know what you FYI is about. i merely reacted to a comment you made. that is all i addressed in this little subthread.

[seabeyond]

271. "Would you punch a man with a closed fist? If yes, why the distinction."

109. Would you punch a man with a closed fist?

If yes, why the distinction.

this is what i read. this is what i was responding to. this is it dude. i have spent all the time addressing THIS. what i feel is pretty fuggin obvious. which was my very FIRST comment and has consistently been my comment, in all my replies.

[joeglow3]

272. Trumad made a claim that he would NEVER strike a female with a closed fist

I asked him if he would ever strike a male with a closed fist and, if so, why the distinction. Your response to that was:

"it wasnt healthy for me to walk into this thread. my eyes kinda opened in surprise, at that"

Can you elaborate on that? Why did your eyes &quot open) in surprise"?

[seabeyond]

273. "Would you punch a man with a closed fist? If yes, why the distinction."

i think the answer obvious. as again, i have stated in every post. that is why my eyes opened wider. maybe a brow drew upward.

you asked a question, i thought obvious.

size.

i am not gonna now go off and argue the rest of the crap being argued in this thread. THAT is what is unhealthy me stepping into. that i wont be doing. cause i have shit in real life i am dealing with.

the only comment to you, was a SURPRISE at the comment you made because i thought the answer obvious.

actually. the comment was not to you. it was in comradity with trumad that he was thinking the same as i.

oh. and on eidt. take note. how once again, i wasted so much time, listening, and explaing. the same shit. once again. just take note. for the future when you make accusations. cause next time? i will by pass this waste of time.

[joeglow3]

274. So, it appears the disagreement is around the fact that you like statements that are absolutes

Frankly, I would be hesitant to hit ANYONE with a closed fist. My decision to hit someone with a closed fist has NOTHING to do with my perception that I could beat the shit out of them. Quite opposite, my decision to hit someone with a closed fist would be as a last resort. As such, if I have reached the point that it was a last resort, I would not give two shits about the gender of the attacker. Yes, we all know that statistically, men are stronger than women and one would expect a much larger percentage of those able to put me in that situation to be men. However, it is extremely sexist to presume that NO woman would be capable of fitting into that group. Additionally, it is extremely sexist to think women need to be coddled and therefore, no man should ever do what was needed to protect himself if placed in a situation with said much stronger woman.

Given the individuals involved (you and Trumad) I would hope you can understand my shock at seeing such blatant sexism directed towards woman.

To look at it differently, what would your reaction be if I said there should be professions, including the military, that have closed doors towards all women because they are not strong enough?

[seabeyond]

276. "he fact that you like statements that are absolutes". no. there is no FACT in your false accusation

to ME.

right there in your title. imediately. you accuse me of something that has NO factual basis. just stop. i have been patient. i have been clear. i have pointed out, explained, and numbered.

stop

(i did not even read the rest of your post. first comment, first line, in the title. that would be the bullshit you talk about)

[joeglow3]

277. "i did not even read the rest of your post." VERY convenient...

Like I said, intellectually dishonest.

[seabeyond]

278. OMG.... omg omg. "Like I said, intellectually dishonest."

truly flabbergasted. you have gotten top prize in audacity.

[joeglow3]

280. Then read the substance of what I wrote and respond

Frankly, I would be hesitant to hit ANYONE with a closed fist. My decision to hit someone with a closed fist has NOTHING to do with my perception that I could beat the shit out of them. Quite opposite, my decision to hit someone with a closed fist would be as a last resort. As such, if I have reached the point that it was a last resort, I would not give two shits about the gender of the attacker. Yes, we all know that statistically, men are stronger than women and one would expect a much larger percentage of those able to put me in that situation to be men. However, it is extremely sexist to presume that NO woman would be capable of fitting into that group. Additionally, it is extremely sexist to think women need to be coddled and therefore, no man should ever do what was needed to protect himself if placed in a situation with said much stronger woman.

Given the individuals involved (you and Trumad) I would hope you can understand my shock at seeing such blatant sexism directed towards woman.

To look at it differently, what would your reaction be if I said there should be professions, including the military, that have closed doors towards all women because they are not strong enough?

[seabeyond]

283. no. you lose the respect of having your post read, when i immediately come up on a fabricated

accusation.

this is what i am repeatedly saying.... to YOU.

i am tired of people flinging shit to see what sticks. i do not read, if you throw shit in my face..... and then you demand i read. no.

[seabeyond]

284. "fact that you like statements that are absolutes" i call bullshit. is that clear enough?

you wnat me to, with an open mind, read your opinion and express back to you...

when i have done nothing but call out this.... crap.

no

[joeglow3]

286. Bull shit

You and I both know you read what I wrote and are now using this little diatribe to avoid discussing it. Talk about flinging shit to see if it sticks.

[seabeyond]

287. no. i did not read what you posted. and now. i am done.

btw, and an edit. you once again... fabricated an accusation. you get that. right? every single one of your post. you do not deal with fact. you make up story and apply it ot me. i do not respect that.

[joeglow3]

289. I already explained how it is not a fabrication. You just decided to not read those posts.

And yet you think you deserve respect.

[joeglow3]

236. Yes. You really have to explain the distinction.

But you and I both know why you won't.

[trumad]

241. Look---let's just put it this way

I would not hit a woman with a closed fist--- but you would.

Case closed.

[joeglow3]

245. Like I said, we both know why you wouldn't answer the question

I am intellectually honest --- you are not.

Case closed.

Another case of your intellectual dishonesty. Just like this gem you ran away from:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=5560275

[trumad]

254. Yeah--suuuuure you are.

[joeglow3]

258. Then why the refusal to answer the question?

[trumad]

259. What the distinction thing?

Well--- it's how I'm built. I was raised not to hit a woman.

For me to take the power of my 6:2--225 frame---close my fist--- and then hit a woman in the face.... well that's just something I just can't do.

Look--- if you feel there is no distinction between a man and a woman... and you want to hit a woman with a closed fist if she attacks you... hey---who is stopping you.

Hope you feel better after you do it.

[seabeyond]

262. kinda like why i do not close fist, and punch my little kid? lol. nt

[seabeyond]

263. other than being nonvioent, always, that is. nt

[joeglow3]

264. I never made that claim

As I said above, I know two women who are big into lifting weights and could kick the shit out of any man I know, including myself. If a woman like one of them came after me and I needed to fight back, I would not hesitate. I could not overpower them and probably couldn't outrun them. That leaves me one option: fight back. I will not just sit back and get my ass kicked, leading to potential permanent or fatal injuries.

Now, would I respond that way to most women? No. Would I respond that way if I could do something other than resort to punching back? Sure. But to make a blatant statement that I would not do it is either intellectually dishonest or extremely naive.

And if I was in a situation where I was facing potential permanent and/or fatal injuries, I would feel alright when looking into the eyes of my 5, 8 and 11 year old children, knowing I was still around to provide for them. Certainly a hell of a lot better than if I left them alone or financially vulnerable because of some irrational belief.

[trumad]

292. I think I mentioned that if your life depended on it...

in other words you would die if you were to fight back...or could not run...well hell yeah---survive God Damn it.

But that's not what I am talking about in this thread.

[Sheldon Cooper]

288. It's not really surprising though, is it?

Coming from the usual suspects, as it were.

[LittleBlue]

38. Little boys? oh my

Do tell.

[trumad]

56. post it...

I don't care.

[trumad]

107. Thanks for reposting that..

To anyone who is looking at Pinto's screenshot. This was a post of mine back in the day ...back in the day that I would take on the errr men's group here on DU... you know...that group who posts hottest female celeb threads.

Anyhow as you can see... it was poorly worded... funny I think..bit nonetheless. ..not written well.

Well... A couple here. ..mostly immature douchebags thought it would be funny to post the sceeenshot...nonstop...hell a few even had their posts deleted.

Ya see...This is how they roll here...like a bunch of adolescent children.

Again..thanks for posting it and reminding people about this.

[trumad]

118. Oh I see...you were watching out for me.

Got ya.

[R B Garr]

125. Another saved post from 9 months ago?! Holy crap!

And you just happened to toggle back and forth at the conservative cave within minutes of having your post hidden, did ya? To check on "the assholes", of course...

[R B Garr]

129. and the "dumb-fucks" are always in your photobucket...

don't ya' hate that?

[R B Garr]

142. ...and you saved the posts for 9 months,

just for days like this, of course. How can you keep all this organized? Sounds like a serious operation.

[R B Garr]

161. So you have files on people with those spreadsheets

that track posts like they have at the cave and then you go back and forth to the cave to see if they copied the same posts you did? Lordy!

[R B Garr]

165. Obsession has nothing to do with basic computer skills.

One would need obsession to be so invested in such a creepy pastime as that, and those cavers do seem obsessed, don't they.

[Texasgal]

190. Life of a net nanny.

Hard to defend that behavior. Pinto is the king of all that. I won't go as far as saying he's a troll because I really don't think he is, I think he's just a typical net nanny that injects himself in all the drama for fun.

Oh well... all kinds here on DU.

[R B Garr]

195. Net nanny is a very kind description.

Thanks for your observations.

I think the word in your 4th sentence might be an accurate description, though. Every thread becomes unreadable, and it's unfortunate because it was with the posters I was interested in following, so the antics become glaringly disruptive.

[Texasgal]

196. Distuptive and obvious.

Every thread, every time. Typical.

It's not gone unnoticed I've just never said anything. I guess I'll be on the "list" now. better watch myself.

[Texasgal]

203. Seems you are always involved.

I'm more of an observer now on DU because of this very issue. Not YOU per say but many like you.

Funny, I don't recall seeing Garr involved like you are in just about every dramatic situation. Sorry, laugh all you want. It's just my observation.

It's not just you either there are a dozen or so that I can always count on. Anyway, with this post I'll assume that you'll keep tabs on me. Guess 'll go back to the lurking mode.

Have a good evening.

[R B Garr]

201. Thank you! Disruptive and obvious is exactly right.

I know others have noticed it, too, but the game is to get posts hidden, so not much can be said. Not to mention -- almost everything I've learned about his obsessions with DU'ers I've learned from his own postings or links when he's stalking people from thread to thread. It's not like I've cared or sought the info out -- it just keeps getting spammed and spammed over and over. Tiresome already.

Well, I think a lot of people here are on his "list" -- a quick check of other sites confirms that. Thanks for your input!

[seabeyond]

217. i saw this the other day. i thought perfect.

[seabeyond]

211. you really are a piece of work pitobean. you have this shit you are feeding on two boards now.

quite an obsession you have going here. what has ANYONE done to you, to make you so fuggin in our face obsessed with us?

[seaglass]

117. It's pretty obvious what you were posting about, not sure why pintobean thinks he's scoring

points, it's really kind of juvenile.

[trumad]

119. Oh but he was watching out for me.

[seaglass]

166. Hmmm I knew I had seen that screenshot recently...

http://www.discussionist.com/?com=view_post&forum=1024&pid=15230

[seabeyond]

218. oh my fuggin' god. really? and he is all innocent about it when shown the ridiculousness

of that screenshot. geez.

really?

he has this shit going on two boards now

[sheshe2]

227. That's ...

Ooooops almost said her DU name...

Lol, so this is posted at Superfuz Bigmuffs Pity Party. Not surprised in the least, sea.

[JTFrog]

281. Yep.

Can't wait to see how his being flagged for review is handled. It will be interesting indeed.

[JTFrog]

327. Well, the admins may have turned a blind eye to that crap,

but as I anticipated, a forced vacation was inevitable.

[Rex]

213. Really?

I thought he was your personal stalker.

[R B Garr]

120. True. And what's also revealing is how much the post he stored for 9 months

and just posted again now looks like the stalking and categoizing of DU'ers posts that one website does. Who keeps someone's posts for 9 months (they do...) Really odd.

[Kingofalldems]

151. They do that at the cave?

Now that is very interesting.

[R B Garr]

162. pintobean's posts reveal all.

In this thread, even.

[Rex]

219. Is that what the self-delete campaign is all about?

[Kingofalldems]

221. Well damn, looks like he just self deleted everything.

I wonder what that's all about.

[DeadLetterOffice]

222. Methinks someone was avoiding more hidden posts...

There was some not-very-nice stuff in those deletions...

[seabeyond]

216. thanks for taking the time to clearly express what i feel about that. over and over and over. nt

[Logical]

18. "I'm a fighter by nature." Says all I need to know about you! LOL. Really?? nt

[randome]

22. Ummm...huh?

[hr][font color="blue"][center]All things in moderation, including moderation.[/center][/font][hr]

[giftedgirl77]

50. Yeah really. I can win fights both verbally & physically.

I thrive in environments that involve challenge whether mentally or physically & don't take any bullshit from anyone. Now, did you have anything of value to add to this conversation?

[Logical]

81. LOL, I love internet toughies! Sounds like a SNL skit. nt

[giftedgirl77]

207. Except I grew up on the streets of Miami, joined

the Army in my 20's, have several years of MMA training & have done multiple combat tours. Not everyone on this site it a treehugging hippie.

[Logical]

212. Only you think they are all hippies apparently. nt

[giftedgirl77]

305. Are u fuckin serious?

What RW smear, I'm not a pacifist so I must be RW? Bullshit, i stand up for myself & don't take shit from anyone regardless of their gender. That doesn't make me RW.

[RedCappedBandit]

3. Meh. There are women who can fight.

Theoretically there are definitely situations where fighting back would be appropriate.

Normally though I'd agree.

[trumad]

16. Well of course there are women who can kick ass..

But so what...I'm still not going to hit them.

[meti57b]

31. If some guy punched me, ... it isn't his ass that I would kick.

[RedCappedBandit]

51. I would if I had to, is what I'm saying.

But yeah, I'd be much more inclined simply to run away.

[yeoman6987]

54. Why this OP?

Congratulations? Slap on the back? Better then everyone? It is easy to brag about stuff without being in the position. Good intentions are wonderful until reality gives you a broken nose or worse.

[ripcord]

102. Women can hurt and even kill men physically

I'm just happy I have never had to make that choice but there are some women who are just as abusive as men.

[trumad]

13. again..your faux concern for teh women's is hilarious.

Me saying I would not punch a woman is bad?

Really...

[DemocratSinceBirth]

11. See my initial post -#6

I am beginning to rethink my position. If I truly am committed to equality isn't it incumbent upon me to treat a woman who is battering me the same way I treat a man who is battering me.

I think I should use as much force as necessary to extricate myself from the situation.

[alp227]

175. I wonder what's with the concern about the right to hit others?

A frequent so-called argument (in what is known as having as opposed to making an argument] by trolls I see online (not calling you one specifically) "hurr durr if a woman wants equality they should be able to be hit like a man". No one is saying that self-defense is wrong when they condemn domestic violence.

[HereSince1628]

14. But you -can- think of a circumstance where a woman would hit you?

I mean what is unspoken is required.

Sleep with one eye open, buddy!

[99Forever]

21. Far too broad of a statement fo rme to agree with.

No person should ever assault another person, but to say that one should NEVER defend themselves is simply ridiculous.

[trumad]

24. You can punch all you want. ..

I'm just saying I won't do it.

[99Forever]

25. Is that what I said?

WTF?

Martyr much?

[rogerashton]

28. I think --

if I were hit by a woman who is a dangerous trained fighter, I would run like hell.

[randome]

29. A dangerous, trained fighter would catch you.

[hr][font color="blue"][center]"If you're bored then you're boring." -Harvey Danger[/center][/font][hr]

[rogerashton]

64. Probably!

Hell, a lame goat could probably catch me, but I'm running anyway. Maybe she won't bother. Maybe she will trip. Maybe the horse will sing.

[seaglass]

180. I like the way you think :-) n/t

[freshwest]

232. My Sensei taught us to not give chase. And it wouldn't be wise legally to pursue.

The local police registered our hands as weapons when we signed up at the dojo. Maybe they were messing with us. But it did make us think.

Said if we hit anyonw using hands or feet offensively, we'd be charged. We had to be responsible, as if we had a gun. Weird.

We went for self-defense and discipline, and frankly, to work out a few anger issues, but not for offense.

We were taught a series of steps to take if threatened:

1) Don't get in a situation where you'll be assaulted.

2) Nothing that is said to you matters. It's about them, not about you.

3) If things look like they're going to get violent, look for an exit.

4) Walk away, you got nothing to prove.

5) If that fails, run until you're out of reach.

6) If that fails, use the minimum force to get free.

7) Then go far enough to be safe. No ego involved.

8) Follow the list every single time.

On a more practical level, though, a person with a firearm could take one out from a distance. If they were close enough, one could escape being stabbed or shot or overpowered by using techniques.

But you don't start anything with anyone. You never know what advantage the other person has.

But I love your:

'Maybe she won't bother. Maybe she will trip. Maybe the horse will sing.'

You have a good sense of humor, there.

[Schema Thing]

30. I assume you hold the same standards if a man is hitting you?

If not, don't claim to be for equality of the sexes.

[trumad]

32. Oh so equity means punching a woman with a fist

Ok..I'll remember that.

[Schema Thing]

35. well, yeah, if you would do the same with a man

I assume you knew that already, in spite of your snark? You do know what the word "equal" means, don't you?

[Man from Pickens]

33. agreed

I always reserve the right to defend myself AND other people against anyone who is violent, and as I've seen women floor a man with a single blow, assuming a woman's violence will not do injury is not a safe bet.

[randome]

36. Why did you self-delete, Islandurp? That was the funniest post in this thread!

[hr][font color="blue"][center]You have to play the game to find out why you're playing the game. -Existenz[/center][/font][hr]

[Islandurp]

37. Had a list of scenarios in my head that went all the way up to a her setting off nuclear bomb...

unless only he could stop it, but he already answered that.

[Dirty Socialist]

40. I Would Call The Cops

[randome]

45. "Excuse me a moment, can you stop beating me so I can call the police?"

[hr][font color="blue"][center]Everything is a satellite to some other thing.[/center][/font][hr]

[Dirty Socialist]

87. Touche!

[Dirty Socialist]

90. I guess I would have to wrestle her to the ground

[randome]

123. Sounds sexy.

[hr][font color="blue"][center]“If you're not committed to anything, you're just taking up space.”
Gregory Peck, Mirage (1965)[/center][/font][hr]

[Threedifferentones]

41. I just don't see why this can't be framed as "much smaller and weaker person" instead of "woman"

How is this not "benevolent sexism?" And what if the woman in question is more physically powerful than myself, ie Hope Solo?

Why would it be okay to deck a little old man who has gone off his rocker, but not Hope Solo? Because one has a penis? How last century of you...

[socialist_n_TN]

53. I agree...........

This SHOULD be framed that way. Kudos for picking up that nuance.

[m-lekktor]

92. benevolent sexism is the first thing that popped into my head as well. nt

[arcane1]

152. Because otherwise it wouldn't be flame-bait, and would be devoid of strawman replies by the OP.

[socialist_n_TN]

42. Sorry I can't agree that I would do the same....

I'm also a trained fighter and I don't discriminate if someone is trying to hurt me or anyone else in my vicinity . But being a trained fighter also means I am trained to use only enough force to defuse a situation and get away. But if that force involves a punch that ALLOWS me to get away, then so be it no matter who the aggressor is.

[deutsey]

282. I've practiced a martial art for over a decade

that stresses only using it when there's no way to avoid doing so.

There are no gender restrictions, though, so I have to say I'd do the same as you.

[socialist_n_TN]

317. Yep. Graduated response. I was taught that way from the very first class I took.......

Use only enough force to defuse the situation and protect yourself or others, then get the Hell out of Dodge. Although, my instructor's instructor used to say that, "Fighting is dangerous work. You should get paid for it, so when you've subdued your opponent, take the cash out of his wallet."

He was joking. I think.

BTW, what style? Wing Chun for me.

[deutsey]

318. Shotokan, supplemented with some very basic Hapkido and Krav Maga techniques

I have a friend who also likes Wing Chun.

LOL about taking the cash. I'll have to remember that when I'm teaching class.

[Dr. Strange]

43. I don't think anyone disagrees with this.

Most DUers seem to believe that if a woman is hitting trumad, then they wouldn't hit her either.

[randome]

44. Another DUzy!

[hr][font color="blue"][center]You have to play the game to find out why you're playing the game. -Existenz[/center][/font][hr]

[Quackers]

49. Lmao!

In before the hide.

[trumad]

55. That is funny

No reason for a hide... funny is funny

[randome]

62. And that is expected of you, trumad. Go with the flow!

[hr][font color="blue"][center]No squirrels were harmed in the making of this post. Yet.[/center][/font][hr]

[lumberjack_jeff]

70. Heh. n/t

[Liberal_in_LA]

99. lol

[randome]

47. White knight?

[hr][font color="blue"][center]Everything is a satellite to some other thing.[/center][/font][hr]

[Puglover]

48. I was thinking more on the lines of...

Last edited Sun Sep 28, 2014, 02:26 PM - Edit history (1)

I'll alert the media. Maybe "60 Minutes" has an open slot tonight.

[trumad]

63. again. You are bent out of shape because I won't hit a woman.

[randome]

131. You're just bent.

[hr][font color="blue"][center]“If you're not committed to anything, you're just taking up space.”
Gregory Peck, Mirage (1965)[/center][/font][hr]

[Union Scribe]

84. I know right?

Why the hell did the OP need to declare this? It sounds a lot like benevolent sexism, as well. The whole premise is that women are weak and fragile and he's a big tough man.

[Doctor_J]

89. a fauxminist

Bizarre op.

[Rex]

52. That's great.

[notadmblnd]

57. Personally, I wouldn't hit, nor would I associate with another who has a tendency towards physical

aggression. I don't engage in it and I don't allow it in my home.

[Scootaloo]

58. "And when I mean hit her...I mean with a open hand or fist."

i like that you leave the option open for headbutting.

[Jamaal510]

223. +1

[TheKentuckian]

275. Gotta have room for an Austin Powers style judo chop, baby. That is how a gentleman settles a

violent woman.

[trumad]

59. an observation

I noted in my Op that I would not hit a woman with a fist for any reason.

Ok...so some said...what if the woman does this or that..... ok...I get that. If a woman had a knife to my throat...or a loved ones throat...

Ya got me there.

I'm talking where the threat of someone or me is in no danger of dying.

I WOULD NOT HIT A WOMAN WITH A CLOSED FIST OR MY HAND.

The big word there is "I"....meaning I would not do it.

I have learned that they're are plenty of men in this thread that would.

OK then...nothing I can do about that.

[randome]

61. But would you, could you, in a box?

Or with a mace! You didn't rule that out, didja??

[hr][font color="blue"][center]No squirrels were harmed in the making of this post. Yet.[/center][/font][hr]

[moriah]

65. Would you, could you, give a guy a break?

I mean, it's true, that many man's a rake
But there's simply no excuse for a body slam
No one asks for it. -- Woman, I Am

-----

Maybe I'm a bad feminist, but the only advice I have to men who refuse to hit a woman is..... just don't let her break plates over your head or crap like that.

Yes, abusive women exist -- both emotionally, verbally, and physically abusive. But the best thing to do in that situation is exactly what advice we give battered women -- get the hell out of dodge. I'm not saying it's easy to do, logistically or emotionally. It took a firearm to get one person I know out, and many go back because they think they're still in love, or worse, that their abuser really loves them. No one deserves to be abused, man or woman.

But I'm not going to come down on a guy for refusing to hit back. I honestly wouldn't recommend anyone who is alone with their abuser to do so unless it's at the last defense of their life. It just makes things worse. And if the man who was hit by the woman and decided to just turn around and walk out really had a shiner like they would from a solid-landed punch, well, they'll at least have evidence to use when they're getting the restraining order. And since it's much harder for a man who is being abused by a woman to get taken seriously by the police, it could be very helpful physical evidence that could be misconstrued if he hit back and left similar marks on her -- who started the fight?

I would only resort to physical violence of any kind if I felt my life was in peril and either it was my only chance and I had no hope (final defense of life -- if I knew I was going to die I know I would not go down easily), or knew I had at least a decent chance of surviving by using it. Most times, unless you're sure you can get the upper hand, it's best for a person who has been abducted or the other situations other people threw at Trumad for saying he wouldn't deck a woman back to be passive and submissive until they see a chance to get that upper hand. No need to escalate a bad situation that you might get out of without fighting.

[randome]

68. Oh, I'm not arguing against anyone's personal choices.

But there's only one reason to share this information on DU: trying to promote it to others.

I mean, I might say I would never drive a white car because I hate white cars. What would your response be to that?

Probably this, right?
[hr][font color="blue"][center]No squirrels were harmed in the making of this post. Yet.[/center][/font][hr]

[TexasMommaWithAHat]

299. I wish my father had beat the shit out of my mother.

I grew up lower middle class, raised by a mother was one of the meanest people I've ever met. We were spanked with belts that left welts. Daddy knew mom spanked us, but I don't think he ever realized how hard she hit us.

My dad would have never left her because they could barely support us in one household on two paychecks, and in those days he would have probably never gotten custody. Besides, who had money for attorneys.

She sent him to the hospital once, but in a police car, of course, because he was the male and must have been the aggressor. She was just plain shit mean and abusive.

He wasn't going to report her. He wasn't going to leave her. And if he had fought back, he most likely would have been jailed.

It was a sucky situation all around, but to this day I wish that just once he could have beaten the crap out of her.

Yeah...that kind of childhood leaves emotional scars, even if I did avoid the physical kind.

[99Forever]

69. Excuse me?

You said that you wouldn't do so under ANY circumstance (paraphrased) and gave holier-than-thou grief to those who said it was unrealistic, and now you are back-peddling?

What the hell is your problem?

[trumad]

78. Come on now...

Use some common sense.

[99Forever]

95. There is nothing common about sense.

Words have meanings and you jumped on me for taking you at yours.

Some people might have apologized and explained themselves. Apparently not you, instead, you double down.

[Nye Bevan]

60. I could not bring myself to take a swing at a woman, either.

I also do not swear when ladies are present.

[randome]

73. I hear that ladies swear a lot in your presence, though.

"Well, that's what I heard!"
[hr][font color="blue"][center]If you don't give yourself the same benefit of a doubt you'd give anyone else, you're cheating someone.[/center][/font][hr]

[bigwillq]

66. If my life is in danger, I'm hitting him, her, it (nt)

[lumberjack_jeff]

67. If a woman is hitting me, I will call the cops.

Getting out of dodge is the secondary action.

Half of all domestic violence is non-reciprocal, and 70% of that is exactly the scenario you describe; she's hitting him.

The other half of all violence is hitting that has escalated to reciprocal violence and is responsible for the vast majority of injury to women.

Doing nothing does her future partners and her eventual children - and even her - no favors.

[randome]

71. What if it's a woman cop who is beating you? What then, smart guy?

OTOH, if you're really a lumberjack, maybe you keep a spare ax with you at all times.
[hr][font color="blue"][center]No squirrels were harmed in the making of this post. Yet.[/center][/font][hr]

[lumberjack_jeff]

72. Well, that's a good point.

A good troll would be to post a "F tha pigs" article accompanied by a photo of a female cop. Heads would explode.

[randome]

80. Indeed.

[hr][font color="blue"][center]If you don't give yourself the same benefit of a doubt you'd give anyone else, you're cheating someone.[/center][/font][hr]

[irisblue]

110. need a clarification please

did you mean lumberjack_jeff that 70% of domestic violence is female partner abusing male partner?

[Prophet 451]

143. The way I read it

Was that he was claiming that 70% of a half was female-on-male, so 35% of the total. I don't know if that figure is accurate (although it sounds questionable to me) but that's what I think he was saying.

[lumberjack_jeff]

249. Yes. 50% is reciprocal, 35% is female on male.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1854883/
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2663360/

[lumberjack_jeff]

242. 70 percent of nonreciprocal.

Half of ipv is reciprocal.

[RoccoR5955]

74. If ANYONE was hitting me, I still wouldn't hit them.

I would use defensive moves, but would inflict no "hits" on the other person, male, female, or otherwise, on them.
It's just the way I was raised.
I was not raised to fight.
I have had to fend off people hitting me when I was a kid, but I have not had the occasion to cause anyone to hit me in over 40 years.
I will turn and run away, and I will fend off blows, but I will never ever strike another person, because violence never ends violence. It only brings more violence.
This has been my philosophy all of my 59 years on this Earth, and I shall stand by it.
I have also explained myself out of having people think that they want to hit me, and I have felt like hitting someone, but I have never, ever hit anyone.

Just my way.

[seaglass]

188. I'm with you. n/t

[randome]

75. WWSD?

[hr][font color="blue"][center]If you don't give yourself the same benefit of a doubt you'd give anyone else, you're cheating someone.[/center][/font][hr]

[cherokeeprogressive]

77. Male or female; ya get what ya give. If that's too brutal for ya?

Then maybe you should think about keeping your fucking hands to yourself and next time remember that there are consequences to your actions.

[trumad]

79. Well that's fine by your standards.

Not mine

[cherokeeprogressive]

85. If there is one standard for everyone, then everyone knows what to expect.

And what is expected of them. When you're around me, I expect you to keep your hands to yourself. No exceptions. Break that rule and pay the consequence.

Cannot get more equal than that.

[treestar]

83. These things are a matter of relative size and strength

If she is bigger and taller than you or stronger, that is different from if she is smaller and lighter.

A small child might hit you and you take it for what it is, you don't have to defend yourself from that as you can't be harmed. Same considerations.

[Doctor_J]

88. has this happened to you often?

This seems like a strange post, even from you.

[Rex]

93. I always wonder why people feel the need to make claims such as the OPs.

Why are they telling us again? Is there some kind of chart I am supposed to be keeping on fellow DUers?

Trumad - won't hit a woman.

Doctor_J - likes Bernie Sanders.

Rex - Still likes Rocky Road ice cream.

[AngryAmish]

98. Position good.

[Doctor_J]

147. I like Rocky road

I don't usually try to hijack threads, but this one needs it bad.

[ProfessorGAC]

279. Well That's A Thread Killer!

Rocky Road? Really?

[randome]

285. I know. Founder's Favorite is the only one worth the time!

[hr][font color="blue"][center]The truth doesn’t always set you free.
Sometimes it builds a bigger cage around the one you’re already in.[/center][/font][hr]

[libodem]

91. Good on ya old boy

First, I'd like to offer you an apology. You don't have to accept it. I haven't been very nice to you sometimes.
But I'm glad you won't hit back even if hit. Backing off and leaving if you can sounds like a plan.

I had to learn self defense in the 1970's because I worked at a State Hospital for the mentally ill. We couldn't hit back either. Sometimes we had to break up fights between persons. You have to know what you are doing or you will get hurt or cause someone else to get hurt. I saw less experienced staff grab the non-aggressor and hold their arms to their sides while the aggressor continued to pummel the victim. But I digress.

There are ways to block blows. And you don't have to cover your head and hide your eyes. Keep your head up and your eyes open. When the fist comes flying, you don't dodge you grab that wrist. And move in close. It stops the swinging.

Unfortunately, my ex got the jump on me, when I was pregnant with our third child. I was working and going to school. It wasn't enough apparently. He had Lupus. He thought working was a social outing because I had adult conversation. I wanted to be home with the kids. It was all so stressful. In the end I could not stay. I went to a battered women's shelter with the kids in 1984.

I had our 3rd child and finished nursing school on my own a couple of years later.

But nobody here believes I''m good enough to call myself a Feminist. (Maybe I'm a Humanist)



THANK THE GODDESS YOU ARE!!!!

[Xithras]

94. The gender of an attacker is irrelevant to me.

If someone is hitting me, I'm going to hit them back hard enough to stop the attack. No more force, and no less force. If a woman is slapping me, I'll slap her back hard enough to make her stop. I'm not going to punch her with my fist because that's probably more force than is called for. If a stronger woman is coming at me with closed fists and is actually doing harm, I'm going to respond in kind, up to and including the point of injuring her. The other person chooses the level of violence and force involved, not me.

Violence is always wrong, but the right to self defense is absolute. If someone is assaulting you, the right to fight off that attacker and defend yourself shouldn't be open to question. If a woman does not want to be struck, then she should not be initiating a violent physical confrontation. It is no more acceptable for a woman to hit a man than it is for a man to hit a woman, or a man to hit another man...and neither gender should have to suffer physical abuse because of societal expectations.

[The Straight Story]

96. Sounds benovolently sexist (nt)

[trumad]

97. It only sounds that way to the MRA gang.

[DeadLetterOffice]

204. I have to disagree with you there.

I am female, feminist, very confused why you posted this OP in the first place, and in agreement that there is a 'benevolent sexism' vibe to your statement.

[trumad]

208. well... domestic violence is big news lately. ..

And me saying I would not hit a woman who is attacking me ain't no vibe.

[DeadLetterOffice]

215. As you wish.

But dude, there is a difference between saying "domestic violence is wrong and awful and I would never engage in it" (still not really clear why you'd feel a need to post it as an OP with no context, but whatever) and implying that women deserve special status by reason of their gender. You acknowledged you might defend yourself against a man but never under any circumstances would you do so against a woman. My gender would thus be more important to you in that circumstance than my height, weight, age, fitness level, fighting skill, foul mouth, or ability to be a nasty-ass person. That means you see my gender before you see me as a person, and that, my dear Trumad, is sexism. Benevolent though it may be, it is still sexism.

[Vattel]

220. well-said

[WestSideStory]

100. This is a very sexist and also contradictory post

Fending off her blows and holding her arms IS hitting. True self defense is a natural right for anybody.

[trumad]

103. really?

How so?

[WestSideStory]

105. Reasons

It's contradictory because if you committed those defensive actions without provocation, it would be considered physical assault. It's sexist because it presumes a man should not hit a woman in self defense because he is stronger than her.

[trumad]

112. Nice try

What. ..you think I'd just grab a woman for nothing? You didn't read my Op to we'll did you. Of course I'd have to be provoked.

I'm going to say this again.... I...meaning me...would not hit a woman with my fist or open hand...period.

Unreal that some here make me out to be sexist because I won't do that.

[freshwest]

233. So many deletions and accusations. IDK why a simple OP is trashed. This pegs the:

[trumad]

234. Oh I know why...

It's all about power and some here get frightened when they get threatened with losing it.

[Iggo]

101. .

[Warpy]

106. Thank you. Unless she's got a weapon, she's not going to do a lot of damage

unless she's trained in martial arts or a nurse who knows how to hurt a guy. We have pathetically weak upper bodies, a source of extreme frustration in daily life.

However, no one of either sex should ever feel afraid in their own homes. While women don't do much damage with their fists, it's still highly unpleasant when it happens. Living with someone who periodically explodes into physical violence is about the most stressful situation there is.

Violence is wrong. Knock it off.

[trumad]

116. I've made it perfectly clear in this thread

That it's something I would not do.

I'm 6:2....225 pounds. I use to Box in the Army and can certainly defend myself quite well.

Yes...There are women who can hit pretty darn hard...yes there are women who can be violent. Yes there are small men who may not be able to repel an attack and may have to fight back. I get that.

Not me.

I am being called sexist because I won't take a fist to a woman. I would call this bizarre...but I know the usual characters hopping in this thread to come after me...and I'm not surprised at all.

[LiberalFighter]

108. I sure as hell ain't going to do like some cops.

Shoot to kill without considering better options that are non-lethal.

[DesertFlower]

111. my late husband's first wife used to hit and scratch him. he

would never hit back. one time he jumped out the window trying to get away from her. she's now 65 -- never re-married. i understand that many of her relationships involved violence. i guess some men hit back.

[LiberalArkie]

114. I was raised to be a gentleman and paid for it in the last year of middle school.

A rough girl wanted my lunch money. She beat me senseless, took my money and watch. I spent a couple of weeks in the hospital with a broken jaw and some cracked ribs, but I did not lay a finger on her. I was the typical 97 pound boy with 6% body fat. I could not even swim since I had no flotation. The ribbing I took in school didn't matter since I had very few friends since I wasn't a jock and was a book geek. I know that if I had fought back it would not have made any difference as she had the weight and strength advantage. Southern girls are a tough bread and generally get what they want. I stopped bringing money to school and just would not eat anything at school. After a few more beatings and being stripped naked by her and her friends, they eventually gave up me as they did not anything to gain.

As far as the school was concerned it was always my fault for what ever happened. You know, the South and chilvary and all that.

I don't know if I could have done anything different though.

[RiffRandell]

122. So I can gladly kick your ass?

Just kidding. I like a fair fight.

[trumad]

124. Well I wouldn't let you...

Last edited Sun Sep 28, 2014, 05:36 PM - Edit history (1)

I'd run before you did.

[RiffRandell]

153. That's probably wise.

I do have some battle scars, but only lost one time against a guy with a broken glass that insulted me and my friend.

22 stiches later I was good to go.

Must be that damn punk attitude in me.

[RiffRandell]

154. Tempting, but I don't think admins will go for it.

DU Fight Club! Don't we already have one?

[RiffRandell]

159. Well that sucks.

I got a pretty good record yo.

[steve2470]

127. I'm the same way

A woman has never hit me. Of course, I never have been a horribly sexist ******* and am not one now. That probably has something to do with it (being hit for being a jerk such as touching buttocks, etc), as well as not associating with violent people, period.

[madinmaryland]

130. Paging DUer, Skittles. Ordering up an ass kicking for trumad...

Yes, indeed!!!

Haven't seen her around recently.

[DemocratSinceBirth]

133. I really am of two minds about this.

On one hand my moral compass informs me not to hit a woman under any circumstance. On the other hand my moral compass informs me women are equal to men. If I would use force to defend myself from a man why wouldn't I use force to defend myself from a woman?

[trumad]

134. That's your call

Mine is different.

[DemocratSinceBirth]

135. You were in the armed forces I believe and I respect that.

Right now women are prohibited from serving in the infantry. Would you support removing that prohibition? If your answer is yes aren't you putting women in a situation where they do direct battle with men.


i don't think this is an easy question. Are women equal to men or not? Are they a little equal? Are they almost equal?

[trumad]

137. Again I'm fascinated by some here...

Who are urging me to reconsider my decision not to use a fist on a woman if I'm being attacked by the woman.

Of course I think women should serve side by side with men. Will they start attacking men if they do?

[DemocratSinceBirth]

139. I don't know what I would do in that situation

But this is a teachable moment.

Do we believe women are exactly equal to men , almost equal to men, or a little equal to men. If we believe women are exactly equal to men shouldn't we treat them exactly the same?

[trumad]

140. sure

But I won't hit a woman with my fist.

[ZombieHorde]

138. Years ago a woman at a gas station approached me and kept punching my face.

I put my hands up to deflect her blows, but I never hit her. She was clearly mentally ill. The cashier came out and said he called the cops, and then she quickly left. He apologized to me and said they have been having trouble with her. I took off before the cops showed up, so I don't know what happened.

I got a bloody lip, but nothing broken.

[steve2470]

167. wow, I admire your self-restraint

[Prophet 451]

141. I disagree

If someone is actively trying to do you serious harm, then it's acceptable to defend yourself with reasonable force. For myself, running away is not an option (due to my disability) but training in wrestling (with a smattering of various martial arts so I could incorporate those techniques into my wrestling) taught me how to immobolise someone without seriously hurting them. I have hit several women in the process of teaching them self-defence.

[Wolf Frankula]

144. If ANYONE Lays Hands on Me

I will lay hands on them. Self defense is the MOST BASIC human right.

Wolf

[Adrahil]

148. I would, under the right circumstances.

I wouldn't strike ANYONE without a reason. But in a situation where I would have struck a man, I would strike a woman as well.

[Kaleva]

149. Would you do the same if a man was hitting you?

[randome]

150. What if she had one of these on her face? Would you hit her then?

[hr][font color="blue"][center]A 90% chance of rain means the same as a 10% chance:
It might rain and it might not.[/center][/font][hr]

[AngryAmish]

155. It appears, for some, a supinistic masochistic experience is worth it.

For others, not so much.

Kink is interesting.

[BlueJazz]

156. I just saw/read this post and I've learned one thing.: If you say it's wrong to hit a woman,...

...and you say, "I Won't hit a woman", a lot of people will hate your guts.

[closeupready]

157. Suit yourself. I defend myself.

Different strokes, I guess.

[NaturalHigh]

163. What's the point of this OP?

I probably wouldn't either, but I certainly wouldn't condemn someone who did. Would you condemn someone who refused to get his ass kicked and defended himself physically.

[Bonobo]

169. It's one in a long line of "look at me" posts.

Who else posts in GD to say it's his birthday?

[NaturalHigh]

171. Yes, I've noticed that.

I am generally suspicious of people who spend a lot of time telling us how good they are.

[trumad]

173. Oh lookie..

The gang is all here... A trifecta of brilliance.

[trumad]

177. check your archive..

[R B Garr]

178. Missed a day on your spreadsheets?

Oh, dear!

[R B Garr]

197. I was busy in real life when you made your post. You know...real life.

LOL @ the riduculous accusation -- of ridiculous accusations. You have saved posts from 9 months ago. You put them somewhere. Holy crap! How ridiculous is that.

[R B Garr]

176. Say, what are the odds

of you keeping track of the exact same DU'ers as the caver's keep track of? Wow, that's such a coincidence.

Seriously, though, thanks for all the info.

[Rex]

182. A learning experience.

As in 'I just learned something new today on DU'.

[R B Garr]

194. I see. So he toggles back and forth from DU

to caver to "learn something new today." U betcha.

[Rex]

205. I see in my minds eye, someone hitting the alert button over and over again.

[Bonobo]

191. Wrong place nt

[dionysus]

202. it's always cheap attention seeking with that guy.

[cherokeeprogressive]

189. How am I better than thee? Let me count the ways... That's the point.

That, and the fact we haven't had a good flypaper thread here lately.

[hunter]

168. I always wear shoes I can run in. I have a few sordid stories too.

Me, my wife and kids, we were at Disneyland when we happened upon a couple who were not happy in the "Happiest Place on Earth."

The woman was beating up on the guy, his lip and nose were bleeding, and he was just standing there taking it "like a man."

Then she bit a large chunk of meat out of his arm, arterial blood spurting, just before the Disneyland Secret Police arrived and dragged the unhappy couple backstage.

He ought to have run away long before that. He had longer legs.

I'm a committed pacifist. I have to be. The berserker genes are strong in me. My mom and many of her ancestors were berserkers. My mom's dad was a World War II conscientious objector. He probably could have killed dozens of Nazis before he fell. Instead he chose to build Liberty and Victory ships. They gave him a choice -- building ships or prison. He and my grandma were both welders.

I've run away from many potentially violent situations before the berserker in me comes out.

I once jumped out of a girlfriend's moving car. I could show you the scars. She sent my stuff back to me, UPS, in a big cardboard box, no note, nothing, and we've avoided one another ever since, about thirty years now, even crossing paths in the trades. The conflict began when she sold some of my software to the military. Then it got worse. She handcuffed her girlfriend's pimp/boyfriend to a urinal and was beating the crap out of him, and I was standing outside the men's room explaining "rough sex."

I decided then I didn't want to live like that.

[U4ikLefty]

170. What if "a woman" pulled a weapon on you?

My ex-fiancée (ugh! It was the 80's) cornered me in the kitchen (I was making dinner) with a stun gun in her hand. As she was raging about a flirty waitress from the night before, she came at me & I kicked it out of her hand. I pushed her to the ground & gathered the stun gun...threat over.

...but wait!!! The cops were called, guess who they wanted to arrest?

Thank God for the elderly next-door neighbors who came out & defended me because they heard everything.

Sometimes women are the assholes.

[ismnotwasm]

183. Fascinating thread

Good job.

[KentuckyWoman]

185. I am short, very obese and just enough of a bitch. If I were to hit you - you would not hit back.

Trumad, I've read a lot of your posts. You would never give a woman just cause to defend herself or a vulnerable person with violence. But I'm pretty sure if I was mad enough and popped you then you'd either have to hit back in defense or else you'd be laying on the ground.

I'm not proud of it but I downed a 6'6" marine one time. The whole town knew he was abusive to his family already. He was smacking around his 7 yr old son in the middle of the grocery store. I walked up and told him to quit. He told me to mind my own fucking business and physically pushed me. I decked his ass just about the time the Kroger manager appeared. Spent a few hours in jail - never charged. Decline to press charges because he didn't want the town men to know some 5' tall old lady knocked him out even if she does have 200 pounds to put behind it.

Of course the whole town knew within 10 minutes.... men were tipping there ball caps to me for months. Enough people came to the aid of the wife and kids she was able to leave him for good and that made it worth it. Not proud that I hit someone one but I don't regret it.

[trumad]

186. I promise you I would not hit you back.

I believe you can kick ass...

Sorry but I'm not just not built that way. It is so against my nature that I would not be able to do it.

[Bonobo]

192. I wouldn't either. Not even a smaller man.

I'm 6'10, 300 pounds, served a stint in the Marines, and can bake an awesome quiche.

If a man or woman that's smaller than me were hitting me, I would defend myself with a modified crab defense ala Joe Frazier, taking most of the blows on my arms and shoulders. Then I would begin a rendition of Unchained Melody, hopefully appealing to my assailant's romantic side thus softening their heart.

Failing this, I would whip up a quick cocktail with some gin, cranberry juice and a sprig of thyme (did I mention I was a mixologist who worked for the Queen once?) and try to pour it into their mouth while they are screaming profanities at me.

If they still attacked, I would just run away (I used to run the 40 in 5.5 flat, but alas it's probably more like 5.8 now that I'm 50).

See how easy?

It's just the way I am.

[NaturalHigh]

224. Frazier's style wasn't effective against tall power hitters.

Look what happened against Foreman. I think Frazier might have been a little overconfident in the first fight, but he wanted revenge in the second fight. The result was the same, though, except it lasted five rounds instead of two.

You would put thyme in a gin and juice? I've never heard of doing that.

[Bonobo]

229. True, but against shorter women, it would be perfect.

Thyme in gin and juice? I just made that up. Tee hee.

[elias7]

193. Would you hit a man back?

If so, what's the difference?

[Dreamer Tatum]

198. Well then grab yourself a cookie, there, son. nt

[gaspee]

200. I don't get

Why people are being so obtuse about this. The AVERAGE woman is much smaller than the AVERAGE man. The average woman is about the size of a 12 year old. What grown man would fight, rather than restrain, a 12 year old.

It's not about chivalry, it's not about so-called white knighting (I hate that fucking term) and it's not about being sexist. It's about the fact that the average woman is not going to inflict serious damage on the average man.

[DeadLetterOffice]

209. Excuse me.

The average woman is NOT the size of a 12 year old. Good lord.

Since the average 12 year old girl is both taller and heavier than the average 12 year old boy, you are managing to suggest that women basically stop growing at age 12. Which is clearly ridiculous.

According to the CDC, the "average" woman in the US over age 20 is just shy of 5'4" and weighs about 166 pounds.
The average 12 year old girl is 4'11" and weighs 93 pounds.

Minor difference there, yeah?
Oy.

[gaspee]

307. More deliberate obtuseness

I was talking about 12 year old males, obviously. The lack of logical thinking is astounding.

[DeadLetterOffice]

308. Are you having comprehension problems today?

As I mentioned above: 12 year old males are, on average, smaller than 12 year old females.

Women are not the size of 12 year old boys.
The average 12 year old boy is 4'10" and weighs 90 pounds.
The average adult woman over the age of 20 is half a foot taller and nearly 70 pounds heavier.

Get your facts straight before you start mocking other people.

[trumad]

210. I would like to say I'm stunned by the comments in this thread

But I am not.... I've been here a long time and know the players who come out of the woodwork when an Op like mine is posted. Everyone of those players are in this thread and everyone of them has stated that they would punch the lights out of a woman if she was attacking them.

I'm the bad sexist guy because I said I would not.

Go figure.

[LostInAnomie]

225. I probably wouldn't either. Not for any noble reasons though.

Last edited Mon Sep 29, 2014, 01:02 AM - Edit history (1)

Personally, I think if a woman thinks she's tough enough to hit a man, she deserves whatever she gets. But, the reality of it is that if a man hits a woman back he is taking a huge legal risk.

Most cops are predisposed to think men are at fault for physical violence between men and women. If you hit her back and the cops show up, you're probably going to jail.

[NaturalHigh]

226. You have a good point there.

Yes, unless there's video, the guy is going to jail.

[closeupready]

248. Yup. Look what happened to Alan Grayson on DU.

He later was exonerated by the police department, but initially, he was arrested.

[joshcryer]

230. For me it's about proportion.

Women don't hit that hard at all. Easier to deflect than to risk actually damaging them. Men have 40% more muscle than women. And pound for pound are 10% stronger.

But if I am met with a woman of my stature and she's hurting me, I'd defend myself. I've never encountered such a situation and think it's unlikely it would happen.

[nolabels]

238. I am kind of fearful for one of the smaller guys at work

His wife is about six inches taller and outweighs him by at least 75 lbs. I don't know him that well but some of the stories from others that do make me think that gender has not much to do with it.

Many years ago, i had an ex who was almost matched me by weight and height, she would come home on some nights drunk. Often on those drunk nights she would want to fight. I would be sound asleep, she would run over, jump on the bed and start punching me. Mostly it was an effort to restrain her and calm her down but i was able to manage it

[valerief]

231. If I were a male and a female was hitting me and the female was a

chimpanzee, I'd be dead, so I couldn't hit back even if I wanted.

[randome]

250. Ah, but some chimpanzees can be reasoned with.

[hr][font color="blue"][center]I'm always right. When I'm wrong I admit it.
So then I'm right about being wrong.[/center][/font][hr]

[valerief]

295. It wouldn't appear so.

[Orsino]

240. When fleeing violence is an option, I recommend it.

When there is only one injured party, that party's legal woes should be minimal. Proving who hit whom first can be complicated or impossible.

[NCTraveler]

243. Really shocked at so many of the replies.

I would never hit a man or a woman. Some serious "stand your grounders" in the comments here.

[Mr Dixon]

244. IMO

My childhood best friend beat-up his girlfriend and her mother, when he told me that I was like dude WTF then he explained that the mother came at his with a claw hammer……….so that was that.

[Xyzse]

251. Same here... Though there are some circumstances where I would run the f... away

[Enrique]

252. what about a guy with glasses?

I forgot the grade school rules about punching people

[randome]

253. What about a rock star with glasses?

It gets complicated, right?


[hr][font color="blue"][center]The truth doesn’t always set you free.
Sometimes it builds a bigger cage around the one you’re already in.[/center][/font][hr]

[Enrique]

260. fair game

[JonLP24]

255. I've been in that situation

I shielded myself and went head first into the bead. Both times she stopped herself not very long into it.

In her case, she is tougher than a lot men physically. As far as people I met that stand up for themselves, she is the best at it. I remember she called while my roommate at-the-time was home and she wasn't, when I came home and called her she started going off about him to me and he yells, "Tell her I was kidding!" Later on, he told me that she scared him.

I didn't fear her but I certainly could see why people did.

[trumad]

261. I get that there are crazy ass females out there who can scare the shit out of you.

and maybe it's just easier for me to extricate myself from the situation because I'm a big guy.

I just won't use my fists to strike back.

[JonLP24]

265. She isn't crazy as far as I would say

She is one of the more sane people I've met. She just has a quick temper and won't take being disrespected. In the case of my friend I think he joked that I was out w/ another woman (wasn't true, I was at extra duty and she knew that but didn't appreciate it).

I worry though her anger could get in her trouble which it has in some cases but more often than not she'll address concerns they way you're supposed to.

I don't want to really pour out why, but the times she did swing on me I don't blame her. When I shielded myself protecting the front by laying head first into the bed she stopped.

My ex-wife is who I'm talking about, I sure do miss her.

[TheKentuckian]

267. What noble gender bias you have.

[DemocratSinceBirth]

268. If a child hits me there is no way I am hitting him or her back, no way...

If I apply that rule to a woman does that mean I'm reducing her to a child?

[joeglow3]

290. Define child

I just saw a story on a 15 year old that could bench in excess of 300 pounds and was a freight train. If he was attacking you, you would just take the pummeling because he is a child? For your sake, I would hope not. We just had a story of a 16 year old killing a 17 year old with a punch here.

[closeupready]

291. Yes, of course. That's applying logic which is 100% consistent

with the logic in the opening post.

Having said that, on balance, I believe females are definitely hated in our patriarchal culture, so I'm not sure I'd want to take my objections to this thread all that far - I did say what I wanted to say upthread, but pretty much have left everyone else to bicker over this sexist OP.

[seabeyond]

293. no. it means you understand the difference in size and strength.

[dilby]

294. Depends on the severity of the blows.

If a woman is swinging a weapon, bottle or throwing haymakers then yeah I will knock her out. But if it's like those petty blows that Ray Rices girlfriend was throwing I would ignore them and tell her to sleep it off.

[LanternWaste]

296. This has been a fun thread.

This has been a fun thread! A little too much drinking methinks, compelled one to delete all traces of his words, while the Usual Sub-Literate Suspects show up to inform us that *not* hitting a female is sexist.

Comedy gold by the posters I like to call Curly-Joe, Joe-DiRita and Shemp (none as good as the original, but still pretty half-witted in their own right).

[trumad]

300. Actually hitting teh womens is considered "equality" to some

[demmiblue]

316. The deletions crack me up!

I don't think drinking is the problem, though. I think it is just his natural state of being.

[Mojo Electro]

301. This is smart.

Because even if she was beating you to a pulp, or she had a weapon, chances are she could still have you thrown in jail.

[trumad]

302. Yeah us poor men.

[ginnyinWI]

304. What I taught my son

When he was maybe ten and his little sister was seven and they would get into a tussle. I said he is bigger and stronger and has to learn, now that he was getting bigger, not to ever fight with girls. I said he could hold her by the wrists until she stopped, but not hurt her in any way. He didn't have to let himself be pounded on.

And it worked. He'd grab her wrists and hold her and made her mad enough to stop fighting. Every time she'd try it again, he'd hold her wrists. It helped them learn to get along better, I think.

[GummyBearz]

309. Question

If a woman was shooting at you with a hand gun would you hit her?

[trumad]

312. No I'd be dead.

[GummyBearz]

315. Get less myopic

Nice dodge. Try to answer this one directly... would you hit a woman who had a gun that was shooting at you, but not hitting you, while you were in an elevator with her and its only the two of you (so, no, you can't run away).

[MannyGoldstein]

311. How about, in any #%^*ty situation

We remedy it in the least-damaging way? Regardless of the gender of the #%^*-causer?

That's usually by walking away.

Sometimes a knock on the head.

[Iggo]

314. So, did this thread devolve into looking for an excuse to hit a woman?

[LanternWaste]

319. Eight rationalizations to strike a female in this thread by my count.

Eight rationalizations to strike a female in this thread by my count.

[Iggo]

321. Never fails.

[Iggo]

325. Now it's nine.

[mythology]

324. That happened after the sanctimonious proclamation

That somebody wouldn't ever hit a woman under any circumstances. Personally I see nothing wrong if you either can't get away or need to use force to create the space necessary to get away, using reasonable force against any attacker.

It's not an excuse to hit women, or anybody else. It's a way to keep myself safe. Frankly it's inaccurate of you to say that anybody in this thread has said they were looking for an excuse to hit women.

[Iggo]

326. But it did happen.

[brooklynite]

320. If someone is posting a "look at me" holier-than=thou thread.....I still won't read it.

[LanternWaste]

323. May one safely presume you read this OP, then?

May one safely presume you read this OP, then?

[skypilot]

322. I've hit a woman once in my life.

I was 14 years old and she was my foster mother. This happened after YEARS of abuse at her hands from the time I was 3 up until the day I hit her. If any of you has ever seen the movie "Precious", the mother in that movie was my foster mother to a tee. The only difference was that I didn't suffer any sexual abuse and she didn't make me cook. Actually, I didn't just hit her...I wailed on her. She had just punched me in the back. The fact that she was a woman just didn't factor in, she was simply the person who'd been making my life miserable for years. I barely considered her a human let alone a woman. She was THAT awful. When I was 3 she once kicked me in the head, when I was 9 she once told me that she wouldn't care if I dropped dead and on April 11, 1979 she punched me. I was determined to make sure that it was the last time--and it was. I was removed from her home that night and that chapter of my life was finally over. Hitting her is not something that I'm proud of but it is also not something that I regret.

I've never hit another woman in my life but no force on earth could have stopped me from hitting that particular woman on that particular night after all I'd been through at her hands.