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Mira

(22,386 posts)
Thu Oct 16, 2014, 10:08 AM Oct 2014

Some Fear Ebola Outbreak Could Make Nation Turn to Science - Andy Borowitz (cowering)




NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—There is a deep-seated fear among some Americans that an Ebola outbreak could make the country turn to science.

In interviews conducted across the nation, leading anti-science activists expressed their concern that the American people, wracked with anxiety over the possible spread of the virus, might desperately look to science to save the day.

“It’s a very human reaction,” said Harland Dorrinson, a prominent anti-science activist from Springfield, Missouri. “If you put them under enough stress, perfectly rational people will panic and start believing in science.”

Additionally, he worries about a “slippery slope” situation, “in which a belief in science leads to a belief in math, which in turn fosters a dangerous dependence on facts.”

At the end of the day, though, Dorrinson hopes that such a doomsday scenario will not come to pass. “Time and time again through history, Americans have been exposed to science and refused to accept it,” he said. “I pray that this time will be no different.”



www.borowitzreport.com




21 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
Some Fear Ebola Outbreak Could Make Nation Turn to Science - Andy Borowitz (cowering) (Original Post) Mira Oct 2014 OP
Where are the coal-rollers on this one? randome Oct 2014 #1
I was driving behind one of those assholes the other day. longship Oct 2014 #4
"which in turn fosters a dangerous dependence on facts.” FSogol Oct 2014 #2
Wonderful! Baitball Blogger Oct 2014 #3
“I pray that this time will be no different.” FourScore Oct 2014 #5
It's sadly funny, because it's true. KittyWampus Oct 2014 #6
Super ditto. SoapBox Oct 2014 #10
This is funny treestar Oct 2014 #7
It is Gods judgement on Texas for denying birth control and not expanding medicaid LiberalArkie Oct 2014 #16
Televangelist John Hagee, who claims the protection of Jehovah, who step forward NCjack Oct 2014 #18
I like it! treestar Oct 2014 #19
... littlemissmartypants Oct 2014 #8
It sounds like science is just a gateway topic and not harmless at all world wide wally Oct 2014 #9
No kidding, it could lead to (gasp) fact based reasoning. Spitfire of ATJ Oct 2014 #15
Ain't THIS the truth? kestrel91316 Oct 2014 #11
Borowitz earns a DUZY Demeter Oct 2014 #12
a wonderful time to be a satirist…. dhill926 Oct 2014 #13
only too true treestar Oct 2014 #20
Belief in math would destroy the entire Republican economic model. Spitfire of ATJ Oct 2014 #14
I love you, Andy!!! valerief Oct 2014 #17
And if we don't do something soon ThoughtCriminal Oct 2014 #21
 

randome

(34,845 posts)
1. Where are the coal-rollers on this one?
Thu Oct 16, 2014, 10:11 AM
Oct 2014

[hr][font color="blue"][center]"If you're bored then you're boring." -Harvey Danger[/center][/font][hr]

longship

(40,416 posts)
4. I was driving behind one of those assholes the other day.
Thu Oct 16, 2014, 10:30 AM
Oct 2014

And that was in a small town rural west Michigan.

An idiot belching black.

FourScore

(9,704 posts)
5. “I pray that this time will be no different.”
Thu Oct 16, 2014, 10:59 AM
Oct 2014

HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!

treestar

(82,383 posts)
7. This is funny
Thu Oct 16, 2014, 11:03 AM
Oct 2014

How long before one of them talks in terms of gods judgement and praying as the way to cure the disease?

NCjack

(10,280 posts)
18. Televangelist John Hagee, who claims the protection of Jehovah, who step forward
Thu Oct 16, 2014, 01:15 PM
Oct 2014

and work some shifts for the beleagared Texas nurses caring for the ebola patients.

littlemissmartypants

(23,459 posts)
8. ...
Thu Oct 16, 2014, 11:08 AM
Oct 2014

Sometimes it is necessary to go a long distance out of your way, to come back a short distance, correctly.

~ Lmsp 🙌

 

kestrel91316

(51,666 posts)
11. Ain't THIS the truth?
Thu Oct 16, 2014, 12:11 PM
Oct 2014

“Time and time again through history, Americans have been exposed to science and refused to accept it,” he said.

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