It's Been Resolved? This Week Is SI Cover, Next Week is the 50 Shades of Grey Movie?

[msanthrope]

This discussion thread was locked as off-topic by Hassin Bin Sober (a host of the General Discussion forum).

Last edited Fri Feb 6, 2015, 08:09 PM - Edit history (8)

I just wanted to get the schedule straight here, since my stores of popcorn and bourbon are running low.....

This week is the SI cover, right?

Next week is the 50 Shades of Grey Movie?

Who are we sending in as our designated "50 Shades" watcher?

I nominate malaise, but I fear we might not get more than "go to the theatre, right fuggin' now."

There's always The Magistrate. I can't even begin to imagine the awesomeness of his movie review. "Whereupon the ubiquitous Mr. Grey began to oscillate the whip....."

Sid Dithers could write a review completely in smilies.

woo me with science would just give us 17 insane blue links.

So would ProSense.

Octafish would probably demonstrate the link between JFK and Christian Grey, via crop circles.

steveleser would make us listen to his radio show.

Skittles---now there's a poster who has long been into BDSM. But the ALL CAPS would kill us.

Third-Way Manny? We'd all get alerted on if we disagreed with him.

Aerows? Somehow it would come back to the damn raccoon.

Mineral Man? Hell, if I wanted to read an appliance manual.....

Trumad? He should stick to other balls. Footballs, baseballs.....

pinboy3niner would do it all in puns.

So would pintobean.

zappaman would just turn it into an anti-Jenny McCarthy screed.

ADDED---

sabrina1 would just drone on about drones....

sheshe would post Obama pics.

(Name redacted per request), seabeyond, bostonbean, redqueen????? Not going there, folks.....

Luminous Animal would just post whatever Glenn Greenwald had to say about how we shouldn't judge 50 Shades, because Obama probably tied someone up, somewhere....

Purveyor would let us know the RT point of view on this Western decadence.

Will Pitt would post a paragraph or two, then make us click over to Truthout.....

xchrom would post a review, then never come back to the thread.

Robb would just be a dingbat about it.

Hannah Bell would link to the WSWS review, and prove that Christian Grey was allegory for the Bilderbergers. (So would her latest incarnation. We see you!!!)

Skinner would post a review in ATA, then forget to reveal the thread.

graywarrior's shown an affinity for duct tape--I wonder if it would translate.....

rhett o rick would accuse us of enabling the cryptofascistauthoritarianscorpratists. Or the Stasi.

HERETIC I AM would post a complete review in pictures taken in his kitchen.



Who would you nominate to be our designated 50 Shades watcher?

TO THE JURY----This thread is COMPLETELY IN FUN--I will remove the name of any person who is offended....they can PM me.

[HappyMe]

1. LOL!

Well done. That's hilarious!

I don't have any nominees.

[greatauntoftriplets]

2. Just so it doesn't have to be me.

Didn't read the book(s) either.

BTW...

[msanthrope]

20. In honor of Cooking and Baking....

[greatauntoftriplets]

27. Bwa ha ha ha ha!

But doesn't he know that you do BSDM with a chicken with white cotton string?

[msanthrope]

35. Too vanilla. I like the earthiness of twine, myself.....nt

[Aerows]

146. Just poke it with toothpicks

That'll work. Piercings are a part of his diet, I believe.

[msanthrope]

150. Skewer it, you mean? nt

[Aerows]

151. Oh, well

poking seems to what Grey likes to do, so I doubt skewering is something he'd object to !

[Historic NY]

85. OMG...

All trussed up an no where to go

[azurnoir]

103. ON that thought there is a DUer who could do it in the same style as he does his memerable

how to pictorials in Cooking and Baking so I'll nominate A HERETIC I AM for the honors

[msanthrope]

106. Added above....

[Nuclear Unicorn]

3. MISSING --

The link to Bain Capital and eToys (both misspelled).

[msanthrope]

16. I was afraid of the filing I would get if I included laserhaas.....nt

[Nuclear Unicorn]

43. "I was afraid of the filing I would get..."

How would you know what the complaint was actually about?

[msanthrope]

44. I'm sure there's a Random Taitz Generator out there on the web. Maybe it would work in reverse? nt

[closeupready]

4. Next week, Jenny McCarthy will have a cigarette outside Olive Garden while

breast-feeding her pitbull, posting for Sports Illustrated's Swimsuit Issue...

[Cal Carpenter]

14. Her UNVACCINATED pitbull!!1!

[Aerows]

147. Eating

chicken coated with corn flakes and ranting about drones.

[jmowreader]

37. You just motivated me to do a web search...

Women who smoke during pregnancy are more likely to have children with high-functioning autism, a new study suggests.

"It has long been known that autism is an umbrella term for a wide range of disorders that impair social and communication skills," lead researcher Professor Amy Kalkbrenner from the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee's Joseph J. Zilber School of Public Health said in a statement released on Thursday.

“What we are seeing is that some disorders on the autism spectrum, more than others, may be influenced by a factor such as whether a mother smokes during pregnancy,” she added.

http://www.medicaldaily.com/smoking-during-pregnancy-may-increase-autism-risk-children-240277

She's a known smoker. Could this have anything to do with her kid's condition?

[polly7]

5. LOL!

Last edited Fri Feb 6, 2015, 06:31 PM - Edit history (1)

I nominate Mr. Demontague. As long as he takes his sketch book with him to report back with.

I missed malaise 'get to the theatre, right fugging now'

[Aerows]

149. Missed *you* Polly

Glad you are back

[brooklynite]

6. You're completely wrong about Manny...

...he would point out that Christopher Grey was a 1%er who was likely funding Hillary Clinton's Presidential campaign, and we needed a candidate who would support Anastasia's struggling working class life.

[PeaceNikki]

10. Christian Grey.

[brooklynite]

19. Not to his 1%er friends...

[msanthrope]

24. You could have a salon about the movie!!!

[HappyMe]

31. We would end up with a long Hillary

commercial if you did it.

[Andy823]

96. Actually

Last edited Fri Feb 6, 2015, 09:11 PM - Edit history (1)

I think she is right on the money.

[pinboy3niner]

7. Kick and bind and gag and recommend!

[NYC_SKP]

15. fook. that was my first thought.

so i had to go sideways with it.

[pinboy3niner]

41. I hear graham is up 4 anything. :) nt

[msanthrope]

125. You know, I always look at your name and wonder what you did with the other 66. nt

[pinboy3niner]

131. 105?

You lost me there.

[msanthrope]

137. The first time I ever read your name, I misread it as

pinboy6niner, because you were post #6. I have dyslexia. Go from there.

[pinboy3niner]

145. Ha!

My username was my last radio callsign in Vietnam. Before that we were on the 6 system and I was Itchy Click One-Six, designating the company's 1st platoon leader. Eventually they figured out that by using the 6 system we were giving valuable intel about our units to the enemy, so they switched to random callsigns.

We knew they were monitoring our radio transmissions. The NVA once transmitted a fake order, in perfect English, supposedly from our higher HQ, ordering our company to move into their ambush.

[msanthrope]

148. I figured it was a callsign...and once I saw your name a few times, it straightened out in

my head.

Itchy Click? You know....I just googled that. I really shouldn't have.

[PeaceNikki]

8. I'll do it!!! I'm single and have no shame about my love for junk TV, books and films.

It will include a lot of fucking cursing, though.

[elehhhhna]

105. you said junktv

[

[LadyHawkAZ]

9. LOL! It ain't gonna be me

I read all three of the books.

[great white snark]

11. Holy crap, well done!

[msanthrope]

29. In context of your username, I take that as a great compliment. nt

[seveneyes]

12. The metaphysical manifestation of such a move

would simply be an allusion to reality.

[NYC_SKP]

13. NYC_SKP would promote, nay, create: "50 Shades of SI", (Spring Tapir Edition).

Since we're dreaming, and like that.

There could be like a fundraiser or a picnic, ya?

[pinboy3niner]

17. Nadin could give us the skinny AND pics with the good rig

And if there should be a fire in the theater, we know she'd be prepared.

[msanthrope]

18. Or hail....nt

[FSogol]

26. Or detached turbine blades.....

[greatauntoftriplets]

34. ...

[msanthrope]

73. That's not irradiated milk, is it? nt

[greatauntoftriplets]

77. The gods forbid!

[Phentex]

78. That would be a negative...

she insisted she never even heard of Fifty Shades! No way would she know the movie was out.

[pinboy3niner]

80. Now, now, be nice

She has her finger on the pulse.

And my comments about Nadin are intended purely as good-natured teasing, as I consider her a friend and I miss her posts here.

[Phentex]

83. Oh, I'm a fan of hers...

still don't want to think about her fingers on anything.

I was just puzzled by her oblivion to something that had been widely discussed in GD for quite some time.

[PeaceNikki]

21. Will Pitt would insist that Christian Grey was indicted on rape charges and will be in custody in 24

business hours.

WillyT's review would be no more than a simple:

[msanthrope]

36. But would Will call him a POSUCS? nt

[PeaceNikki]

47. Perhaps.

After insisting that Grey Enterprises Holdings, Inc had be HAXOR3D!!11@!

[msanthrope]

91. There's at least a book or two in that! nt

[FSogol]

22. Why watch it? We can all comment without learning anything about it, just like normal.

[jberryhill]

28. Damn straight

[FSogol]

33. It's an outrage!

Great clip, btw.

[Rex]

97. Thread win at 3:29PM!!!

[jberryhill]

23. I'll have to rest up for that one

[msanthrope]

40. Maybe you could come up with a compensatory damages amount for anyone who

watches the movie?

Start a practice based on injuries sustained by suburban white people trying the 'moves' they saw on film?

[jberryhill]

51. Hmmm....

This movie doesn't come with a prominent disclaimer, does it?

[msanthrope]

52. Could I get away with assigning law students to write a potential disclaimer for 50 Shades?

Or would the Dean want to talk to me again????

[1StrongBlackMan]

25. I nominate Morpheus ...

the review would be entirely in GIFs!

[msanthrope]

62. I can't even imagine the humorless alert messages that would generate from HOF....

It would be a HOF/GIF/MO showdown.

[pinboy3niner]

68. I still think we should close GIF/MO. nt

[msanthrope]

70. Personally, I think it's HOF that's the 8th amendment violation. nt

Last edited Fri Feb 6, 2015, 07:45 PM - Edit history (1)

[handmade34]

30. to have on hand when watching...

oh gawd... and from Vermont...

http://www.vermontteddybear.com/sellgroup/fifty-shades-of-grey-bear.aspx?bhcp=1

[pinboy3niner]

32. If only Random Thoughts were still here

He'd do it for beer and travel money and many experiences--and throw in random music videos gratis.

[msanthrope]

38. But we'd have to see that creepy-ass Burgess Meredith pic.....that gave me the willies. nt

[HappyMe]

42. Yeah.

The eyes seemed to follow you or something.

[pinboy3niner]

48. Like an evil Penguin!

[Aerows]

140. I was thinking along the lines

of an owl with a deformed beak!

[stevenleser]

39. LOL, it can't be me and you're right. I would have delivered it on my radio show!

I'm on vacay from Feb 11-26.

[msanthrope]

126. Anything for the ratings, Steve!!! Maybe you could have the Rude Pundit

read excerpts from the book next time he's on!!

[pinboy3niner]

45. AHA! I've got the PERFECT DUer for this!

Who wouldn't want to hear the 50 shades play-by-play from CaliforniaPeggy?

[msanthrope]

49. It might surpass this----

[onenote]

46. The most perfect post for a Friday afternoon in DU history

Kudos!!

[msanthrope]

50. I thank you!!! nt

[Aerows]

153. I have to agree

This is hilarious!

[HERVEPA]

53. I nominate Another Liberal, who could tell us why the Ukrainian fascists were responsible

for this movie (via an article from Russia Today, of course)

[FSogol]

117. "NATO is responsible for that insipid movie. Fearless Leader tried to warn us."

<Insert RT article that says nothing about NATO here>

[classof56]

54. Hey, this is great--Better Know Your Fellow DUers.

Very clever. Gotta love it, and will K&R just so I can keep reading the posts as they pile up. I can't be added to the list 'cause tomorrow I turn 77 and clearly, I'm WAAYY too old for that 50 Shades stuff. Never too old to laugh, though, so keep 'em comin'!

Cheers to all.

[pinboy3niner]

59. We have you in mind to review the sequel, 79 Shades of Gray, just 2 years away

Cheers!

[classof56]

75. Awesome! Can't thank you enough.

Gives me a reason to stick around another couple of years.

Cheers back atcha!

[sheshe2]

81. Happy Birthday to you Classof56

Cheers~

[msanthrope]

123. Happy Birthday!!! nt

[pinboy3niner]

55. Two words: Library Girl!

[greatauntoftriplets]

56. She'd call them shillbots for big pharma, despite a lack of any evidence...

before blaming President Obama for everything wrong in the world!

[msanthrope]

58. I'm not sure EL James isn't Library Girl---they both have the same literary merit. nt

[Warren DeMontague]

109. She'd sign up as "xenu's liliputian safeword"

[Blue_Adept]

57. I'm looking forward to the film

I suspect it may be that rare case where the film is better than the book, since they're ejecting a lot of the truly awful stuff - and the dialogue, and can make something more interesting.

The book is utter trash and a real problem with its portrayals of what it thinks BDSM is and bad power dynamics in a relationship.

But the world isn't made up of couples that are equally balanced, with many on both sides of the relationship that don't want it to be equal.

So seeing different lifestyles is interesting.

[blackspade]

60. Ha, Ha!

[BeanMusical]

61. "Sid Dithers could write a review completely in smilies."

[pinboy3niner]

63. His entire review would be a MIRT batsignal. :) nt

[msanthrope]

64. Add one or two more, and you've got the longest post Sid's ever made.

[BeanMusical]

67. Lol!

[JustAnotherGen]

65. I hope none of them are!

Sometimes we gotta have fun!

[ismnotwasm]

66. 50 shades trailer in Legos

Top that.

[msanthrope]

69. I suspect the Legos are more animated than the actors...OMG that was funny! I raise you a Gottfried:

[ismnotwasm]

71. Oh crap! No way

Too funny

[Warren DeMontague]

129. That is my all time favorite.

[msanthrope]

94. Added you above.....

[NanceGreggs]

152. Gotta hand it to you, rhett ...

Your self-deprecating comment made me LOL!

Well done, sir - extremely well done!

[hifiguy]

74. That thread will require extra

and

I can be agnostic there. I've heard the book is such a piece of ill-written shite I'd sooner read the labels of aspirin bottles on the basis of the descriptions alone. And if the book's that bad the movie will assuredly be worse. But I will bring a lawn chair and some sandwiches to go with the beer and popcorn.

[Ilsa]

76. As relevant subjects and news on DU are becoming more rare

in favor of junk entertainment and beating dead horses, I'll just skip DU next week. I have no interest in sifting through 50 threads on 50 Shades in GD to find something worth reading.

[pinboy3niner]

79. 50 Shades of GD is a movie I'd go see in a heartbeat

[FSogol]

124. I'll wait for the Mystery Science Theater 3000 version.

[Aerows]

155. I want the version

where it is silent and dubbed by Monty Python.

[msanthrope]

93. You must be so fun at parties! (Look, it's Friday afternoon---laugh a little!) nt

[Ilsa]

100. It's been a long week. No party today. nt

[Teutonic Samuel]

82. Does Anyone Here Even WANT To See That Movie?

Ugh!

[Orsino]

90. It's literally objectifying.

[Baitball Blogger]

102. You would have to tie me down to see that movie.

[sheshe2]

84. Awesome thread msantrope

well done!

[msanthrope]

122. If you can't laugh at your friends.....who can you laugh at!!! Thanks for being a good sport! nt

[sheshe2]

135. Lol~

[zappaman]

86. Well done!

But for the record, I love Dr. McCarthy!



She's so smart, she wears glasses!

[pinboy3niner]

88. I was going to make a funny comment about her husband

But apparently she has a different one now. I'm so behind on the celeb gossip!

[msanthrope]

99. Google U is giving out doctorates now? nt

[Bobbie Jo]

87. Love it!

[nxylas]

89. Damn, I need a trademark

Something that will make me famous enough to be included in a thread like this. You gotta get a gimmick if you're gonna get ahead.

Let's see...gratuitous Doctor Who references?

[pinboy3niner]

92. I think somebody's already got that one, so you're a bit tardis

[Rex]

95. I'd send YOU, because I know you are a lawyer and must make the big bucks.

Who else can afford a $20 bucket of popcorn?

[msanthrope]

98. I take my own. Rules, schmules. nt

[Rex]

101. Ah a maverick lawyer that plays by his own rules!

Now that is all kinds of awesome!

[msanthrope]

104. Her own rules, as my username would indicate.

[Rex]

114. Ha never noticed that, you are missing the I!

Excuse me, a lady lawyer that scorns modern societies rules and makes here own, better rules.

[msanthrope]

120. I unabashedly sneak in the Twizzlers from the dollar store. Screw em!! nt

[Rex]

130. Baby steps. One day the Oligarchs of Film will be brought down!

When they came for my 2 dollar bucket of popcorn...I said nothing.
When they charged 8 dollars for a medium coke...I looked the other way.

(cue movie voice man)

Now one maverick lawyer will defy the system and take on the Movie Moguls in a madcap comedy loosely based on real life events!

SEE Ms Anthrope sneak in an entire box of vanilla wafers.
SEE the Move Moguls threaten her with various villainous poses, including shaking a fist in the air and random cursing.
HEAR the popcorn melt under the intense heat of lava hot liquid butter!
FEEL the intensity as our maverick lawyer grills a custodian over flash light abuse.

They said it couldn't be made...but they were WRONG! A movie that has it all...lawyers, lawyers watching a movie, lawyers eating popcorn watching a movie...dun dun DUN...ILLEGAL POPCORN FROM WALGREENS!

[msanthrope]

136. It needs to have "I Feel Good" cue in at the end of the voiceover, as I lead a movement

of millions in my quest to freely bring in nonpareils.

I've got a cute black lab and a child....we need to get them into the feelgood movie of the year, too!

[FSogol]

110. You really want 72 billable hours for having a lawyer watch a 2 hour movie?

[Rex]

115. As long as someone else pays for it, sure why not.

ROFL! 72 billable hours!

[AngryAmish]

107. You, sir, then inserted a shoe horn into...

[msanthrope]

111. You know, you once wrote the funniest post about cow shit I ever read---

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=102&topic_id=4375219&mesg_id=4375388


Don't know what made me recall that....

[Warren DeMontague]

108. You left me out.

Hurt, I am. And not in a good, masochistic, consenting adult BDSM relationship sort of way.

[msanthrope]

118. You are mentioned upthread--we want you to go and bring your sketchbook!!!

I am sorry, and I mean that the most submissive, passive way.

[pinboy3niner]

112. graywarrior's definitely out, due to her, um, mallardy

[Paulie]

113. Thread OP survived the jury.

Back to lurking!!! Heh

[msanthrope]

116. Do you have the results??????? nt

[zappaman]

133. Uh oh

Someone doesn't have a sense of humor.
I bet I can guess...

[Paulie]

154. Yes but it doesn't add anything to this thread

Stick with fun, not drama.

Wow. Two posts in one day! The lurker Union gonna toss me out on my ass!

[Rex]

134. Well that goes to show that there is at least one person on DU without any sense of humor.

[Warren DeMontague]

119. Swamp Rat:

[msanthrope]

121. OH HELL!!!! What a blast from the past!!!! That's awesome!!! nt

[msanthrope]

127. Anybody have the jury results???? nt

[MineralMan]

128. Say now! I resemble that deeply.

Yes I do.

[msanthrope]

139. You are a very technical writer.....

[MineralMan]

143. Indeed.

That has served me well.

[Aerows]

132. A funny thing happened to Aerows on the way to the theatre

A raccoon bit her and it turned out that it was a better situation than being forced to watch 50 Shades of Grey. Aerows lucked out by only getting a shit ton of rabies shots in various painful parts of the body.

She preserved herself from mental illness.

Mental illness related to being a fan of 50 Shades of Gross.

[msanthrope]

142. You are a good sport.....nt

[Aerows]

138. NCRaleighLiberal

would be attempting to crossbreed a tomato that would leave the actors without voices and physical bodies, the director with out a soul, and the producer sitting on the toilet for so long that his body became mummified.

They would bury it in his tomb in the New Mexico desert with the ET nintendo cartridges as a fitting place for his remains.

NCRaleigh liberal would shower the people with tomatoes, peppers and great joy. All would be well as we feasted on top quality produce.

[Initech]

141. And I thought I felt unclean after watching "Gone Girl".

No way in hell will I be watching 50 Shades Of Grey.

[Aerows]

144. I still think

it should be called Fifty Shades of Cray-cray.