10 truly bizarre Tea Party bills: From nipples to militias to religious zealotry

[DonViejo]

The Montana Legislature is now controlled by some far-right loons. You won't believe what they're trying to pass

ERIC STERN

Here are the 10 most bizarre Tea Party bills currently being debated in the Montana Legislature, which is now controlled by the right wing of the Republican Party. Some of these bills, believe it or not, have a chance of making it to the governor’s desk.

1) Prepare for National Ammunition shortage (SB 122). When Obama comes to get our guns and bullets, Montana will be ready. This bill cites the “serious risk” that America might run out of ammunition and exempts Montana’s ammo manufacturers from paying any taxes at all, as an incentive to produce more bullets so we can survive the Obama gun rapture. Its author, Matt Rosendale, was an unsuccessful congressional candidate in 2014 whose campaign ads featured him shooting drones out of the air with a rifle.

2) Establish Armed Militias in Every Town (SB 130).

-snip-

3) Require that nipples and areolae be fully concealed; prohibit “simulated genitalia” (HB 365). Our state already has a general law against indecent exposure but Montana’s social conservatives feel it isn’t enough. The new proposal lists body parts. Specifically, it would prohibit “exposing the anus, areola or nipple with anything less than a fully opaque covering.” Better yet, it would forbid the wearing of “any costume or covering that gives the appearance of, or simulates, the genitals, nipple or areola.” So much for my Halloween idea.

4) Montana Legislative Dress Code. A young conservative ascended to speaker of the House this year, and his first order of business was to propose a new dress code that advised women “to be mindful of necklines and skirt lengths” and also to wear only “dress blouses or suit-like dresses,” and never “jersey or fleece material” or leggings. Areolae and nipples were not mentioned.

5) “Encourage Critical Thinking in the Classroom” is the title of HB 321. The preamble of this legislation says, “The scientific community has not resolved or answered the questions related to the origins of all life or the origin of our universe.” It would give public school teachers legal immunity if they want to teach “alternative” theories.

6) Allow Concealed Weapons in Bars, Banks, and on Campuses

-snip-

7) Ban “Foreign or Religious Law” From American Courts (SB 199).

-snip-

8) Return All Federal Lands to State Ownership (LC 1758 et al).

-snip-

9) Nullify All Federal Gun Laws (HB 203).

-snip-

10) Allow Hunting With Silencers (HB 250).

full article:
http://www.salon.com/2015/02/17/10_truly_bizarre_tea_party_bills_from_nipples_to_militias_to_religious_zealotry/

[spanone]

1. a small slice of their ignorant agendas, proudly on display.

[guillaumeb]

2. how to respond?

1) Why do they not secede? Oh yes, that has been done before.
2) Was the movie Red Dawn based in Montana? Do Montanans know it was a movie?
3)Would all the mountains have to be covered? (mountains look a lot like breasts you know) Good thing the Grand Tetons are not in Montana. (French language joke)Grand Tetons means large breasts in French
4) Sounds like they want to hire Barbie and Ken. No sex area problem there.
5) This one is a joke, right?
6) obvious
7) If the American Constitution was inspired by the Bible does this revoke the Constitution
8-10) expected

[hollysmom]

3. hunting with silencers? what a bunch of widdle bitty babies these e hunters are

they probably take part in the huts where animals are tied into place so they can't run. I think they missed the whole idea of what Hunting is - forget the idea of fair play and letting the strong survive.

I don't think anyone who supports this should be allowed a gun - they are brain damaged lazy bastards. any offense to truly out of wedlock children is not meant,

bas·tard
ˈbastərd/Submit
noun
1.
archaicderogatory
a person born of parents not married to each other.
synonyms: illegitimate child, child born out of wedlock; More
2.
informal
an unpleasant or despicable person.
"he lied to me, the bastard!"
synonyms: scoundrel, villain, rogue, rascal, weasel, snake, snake in the grass, miscreant, good-for-nothing, reprobate; More

I am using the second definition.

[dilby]

24. If you have ever lived in an area where hunting takes place you probably would support this.

When I lived in northern Arizona during hunting season you would hear rifle fire all day long.

[Glassunion]

29. Agreed.

IIRC it is a requirement in France.

Edit: not required. Just frowned upon. Apparently piercing the surrounding countryside with the report of an un-suppressed firearm makes you an obnoxiously loud shit-head.

[hollysmom]

30. nope, I don't live in a hunting area

I was under the impression that few people live around hunting areas - isn't it in a forest or the mountains, unless you are in a cabin in the woods, I thought the idea was to put a distance between housing and hunting - if people live near hunters, I would want to know when to duck.

[dilby]

32. Generally it's 500 feet from housing but in rural areas noise travels for miles. n/t

[dhol82]

34. Yeah, I live on a bay

During duck hunting season I get woken up by gun fire from the water.

I can see the duck blind boat (don't know the correct term) from my window. Not sure how far away it is but always worry about bullets going where they shouldn't.

Strangely enough, just to north there is a protected nature preserve where they can't shoot. Not sure how they figure out how to manage the boundaries.

Also have a gun club about 4-5 miles away. Sunday mornings are fun.

[Thor_MN]

4. Lots of crazy, but Number 2 has merit

Wanna be a Gunz,Gunz, Gunz person? Join your local militia. And by the way, accept that it will have lots and lots of regulations, like training, insurance, mandatory drills, etc.

[Panich52]

5. Even close to T Jefferson's preference - he was against a standing peacetime army

[Panich52]

6. Rather typical TP laws, but don't they realize #7 would void their 'social' laws?

From anti-gay to anti-choice to their own anti-science (#5) would be counter to #7 since they are all religion-based. Even Sunday 'blue laws' would be void. Go for it!

[Fred Sanders]

7. Mainly guns and naughty bits? Hunting with a silencer.....the crazy is so crazy the media refuses to

belief it even when it is written up?

But hey, what about that snow storm and scary ISIS.....and Obama is pretty scary too, right?

[Major Nikon]

10. Montana has like 11.5 months of winter

So they are only really cancelling the two weeks of man nipple exposure window.

[onehandle]

8. Gratuitous Nipples --->

[img][/img]

[FSogol]

9. It's times like this that DU misses the Nipple Alerter!

[Rex]

11. “exposing the anus, areola or nipple with anything less than a fully opaque covering.”

BUT those are my best features!

[Major Nikon]

12. Imagine how mad you'd be if you just had your asshole surgically enhanced

[Rex]

14. We would be going to court to expose my beautiful new butt!

"Hey judge, you have Prince Albert in a can? Well you better let him out before he suffocates! I kid, I kid...seriously...LOOK AT MY ASSHOLE!"

[Major Nikon]

15. You'd definitely need before and after pics

My starfish was missing a leg!

[onehandle]

13. I like the ring around your anus.

Hold on while I spellcheck my reply title...

[img][/img]

[Rex]

16. They are icy rings...brrrr...

Taint a good thing no sir!

[AtomicKitten]

17. More guns, less nipples.

Beekeeper or Montana dress code?

[yellowcanine]

36. Those burkas could be jersey material. Might not pass muster.

And they don't look like a "suitlike" dress either.

[irisblue]

18. wouldn't critical thinking mean the other proposals be overturned?

Critical thinking is a problem for Teapartiers.

[hifiguy]

19. That is a "special" kind of stupid.

That there is so much of it truly makes me despair for the future of humanity.

[dixiegrrrrl]

20. I want them to pass THIS one:

7) Ban “Foreign or Religious Law” From American Courts (SB 199).

They appear to have no idea of the kerfuffle that will stir up.

[yonder]

21. Sounds like my home state of......

.....Idaho! This years legislative session may not turn out to be as bad as last year, but you can never tell until its over. Some similarities here:

#6) Allow concealed carry without permit.

#8) Still studying returning federal lands to the state.

#9) Nullify federal clean water/scenic river protections to keep them suction dredge miners happy. After all, disturbing river beds is good for the environment. Huh???

Hold on folks, it ain't over yet.

[samsingh]

22. these people don't believe in small government

btw - if some of these passed, these morons would be severely hurt by their impact.

[OldRedneck]

23. **** DU SHOULD NOT HAVE PUBLISHED THIS DIARY *****

This is a dangerous diary that should not have been published.

It'll give Tea Party loons in other states too damn many ideas!!!

I can see some of our Virginia Teabaggers introducing identical legislation in our next General Assembly session.

[Jamastiene]

25. "exposing the anus"

Well, then, put all of the Teabaggers in jail now along with most of the Republican Party. They show their asses routinely. Every time one of those assholes opens their mouth, they are exposing their anus.

[Tierra_y_Libertad]

26. How do they sign those bills when wearing straitjackets? Do they sign them with drool?

[underpants]

27. #1 did it ever cross their mind that ammo producers are keeping production lower on purpose?

I know that every once in a while the ammo marketing association (NRA) comes out with a HE'S TAKING OUR GUNS! Or AMMO SHORTAGE! campaign but nothing has really changed.

[Ikonoklast]

28. Actually, hoarding by these morons is the biggest reason some rounds are hard to find.

The manufacturers are running flat-out in order to keep up with certain calibers, but overall there is no real shortage.

[Glassunion]

31. Google image search "Montana State Legislature"

I didn't get no nipples... But I did get guns, tights and weed.

Screen cap of my search:

[Beartracks]

33. "Ban religious law" -- and then propose THIS kind of legislation?

Making sure there's room for religion in the science classroom.

Making sure women don't accidentally excite their poor male colleagues. (They could require burkas, I suppose, just to be extra sure.)

Making sure there are a shitload of guns and ammo to exert your righteousness and defend against the heathens in the event that, for some strange reason, the rapture doesn't take you.


There are LOTS of ways to make religious law without specifically citing religion; you just have to couch it in the right kind of secular-sounding language. Like a wolf dressed in sheep's clothing, or creationism dressed as science.

Ignorant hypocrisy, thy name is Tea Party.

=====================

[yellowcanine]

35. I want to know if there is an exception to the fleece ban if it covers the nipples?

If a woman has a flimsy blouse the fleece might be necessary to prevent the nipples from showing. Just sayin.'

[Initech]

37. Shortage of ammunition? What the fuck are they smoking?