So you're boarding a bus and there are only 2 seats available... one is next to

[Erose999]

Mitt Romney, the other is Tom Cruise. Which batshit-crazy, multimillionaire cult member do you sit next to, and why? Discuss.

[Scuba]

1. Well, Cruise might pee on your shoes, so Rmnoney I suppose.

[rfranklin]

32. I tell Cruise I will beat his ass unless he goes and sits with Romney...

then spread out and hog the two seats I commandeered.

[Sheepshank]

36. yup...this gets my vote :)

[orwell]

2. RMoney on a bus...

...that's just crazy talk.

Thanks for the laugh...

[Mz Pip]

39. I'm sure Rmoney is friends

with a few people who own private bus campanies.

[dmallind]

3. Cruise. He's smaller and I'd have more room. nt

[badtoworse]

18. I commute on a bus. That's how I choose a seat.

[HereSince1628]

4. Neither, I recognize it's too bizarre to be real and wake-up. n/t

[JoePhilly]

48. My response was going to be "Wake up in a cold sweat".

[Poll_Blind]

5. Erose999, YOU don't know the history of buses like I do so...

...YOU can't even ask that question.

Erose....Erose....Erose- can I speak? Can I speak? You're being glib. Your question is glib. I know the history of buses and you're being glib just by asking that question.

PB

[Lawlbringer]

23. rofl

I would hate to strike up a conversation with either, but I'd think that Cruise would jump on me about everything and try preaching to me. Romney'd just talk down to me.

[hlthe2b]

6. Cruise would, at least, be interesting.... n/t

[Tierra_y_Libertad]

7. On the kind of bus either would be on, I'd be in the swimming pool sipping champagne.

[SCantiGOP]

8. It would be more fun to screw around with Romney

Ask him why these damn poor students don't just sell off some of their investments to pay for college like he and his wife had to when they were struggling justacoupleof-millioniares. Or, instead of taking food stamps ask your parents for a $200,000 loan and start a business. Then I would ask to see his magic underwear.

[goclark]

9. Tom Cruise hands down

First off~ Romney would not be in a Bus ~a bus would be too low class for the 1% idiot.

If I had to sit next to him I would ----- ( Oops! better not put my thoughts in writing)

[sinkingfeeling]

10. Tom Cruise of course. He's much cuter.

[Zalatix]

11. Tom Cruise, totally.

The man isn't 1/1000 as vile or dangerous to society as Rmoney.

[randome]

12. Cruise. Romney would be uncomfortable as hell being 'cooped up' with normal people.

[leveymg]

13. The only 'bus you might see them on would be in First Class of an A-380

or maybe a private one, like this guy's:

[Life Long Dem]

14. I'll stand,

but thanks for asking.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

15. Cruise

I have scripts I'd like to get to people, and I'm willing to be a whore if needed.

[woodsprite]

16. Rmoney. I'd use the opportunity to ask question about LDS.

That should be good for a few hundred miles.

[Lint Head]

17. I would get off and take a different bus.

[independentpiney]

19. I'll strap hang nt

[11 Bravo]

20. Cruise, in a heartbeat! Hell, Mel Gibson would rank ahead of Romney in my mind.

[obamanut2012]

21. Tom Cruise

Even though he has ruined some of my favorite movies, I could still talk to him about the making of his movies.

[gratuitous]

22. Break wind in the loudest, sourest manner I was capable of, sit down next to Tom Cruise

And say, "Hey, it looks like there's a seat open up there next to Mitt Romney."

Failing that, I'd take my bike back off the bus rack and pedal to my destination.

[hifiguy]

28. You win the thread!

[Lawlbringer]

24. I would imagine that

they both smell good. At least.


But I'm an optimist. I stand on busses and trains and just read.


Cruise would probably preach at me and keep talking in my ear. Romney would probably just talk down to me, which I can drown out. So, I'd have to actually say Romney.


Ron Paul, though, would get thrown out the emergency exit as soon as I first lay eyes on him, though.

[TlalocW]

25. Cruise and then...

I would mutter under my breath about how powerful, "my lord, Xenu," is the entire trip.

TlalocW

[Selatius]

26. +1 nt

[hifiguy]

27. Tom Cruise

in the unlikely event I'd see either on a bus. He takes up less space and would probably leave me alone after I pull my everpresent book out of my bag. Mittens would either try to gladhand me politically or start rattling on about his cult.

[krispos42]

29. Tom Cruise

It would be less awkward and be kinda cool for years.

[StopTheNeoCons]

30. I'd stand or get off the bus if being seated was mandatory..nt

[Iggo]

31. Only two seats left?

I'm able bodied, I'll stand. Plus I'd probably be giving up my seat to some old lady getting on at the next stop anyway.

[Gold Metal Flake]

33. In private life Romney would ignore me, Cruise would not.

So between the two I would pick Romney and enjoy a quiet trip.

[RebelOne]

34. Definitely Tom Cruise. n/t

[Robb]

35. Cruise. You only get one shot at a man's wallet on a crowded bus...

...and I just know Cruise has more cash on him.

[Earth_First]

37. "DRIVER! HOLD THE DOOR PLEASE!"

"Thank you, I'll walk..."

[longship]

38. Easy. Tom Cruise. Then...

I would take out my iPad and surf over to Operation Clambake and laugh and laugh and laugh. I would elbow Cruise and keep sayin', "Do you see this shit?" and laugh and laugh and laugh.

I might even have a copy of the South Park Scientology episode on my computer. And as I watch it I would laugh and laugh and laugh.

Too bad George Carlin never explicitly took down Scientology. There would be a lot more laughing in the seat next to Mr. Galactically Stupid Cruise.

[A HERETIC I AM]

40. The reason there are only two seats available....

is because the "bus" is a million dollar customized Motorcoach where the sitting area has only a couch and two swivel recliners. You just got on either Mitts or Tom's Marathon and one has to wonder....


Why?

[DutchLiberal]

41. Tom Cruise, to ask how Penelope Cruz was.

[felix_numinous]

42. Won't matter

because I'll have my headphones on listening to Ozric Tentacles.

[Bruce Wayne]

43. Romney, if he promises not to pretend I pinched him.

Actually I don't have a problem sitting next to anyone I happen to disagree with. But Romney probably takes a shower more frequently.

[surrealAmerican]

44. I have a hard time imagining Romney on a public bus.

He'd be so uncomfortable.

[rppper]

45. Tom Cruise...no doubt...

I think it would be an interesting conversation.....

I'm waaaaaay to Irish to sit next to mittens for any length of time...although he doesn't offend me nearly as much as Rove....I'd give romneys firstborn for 15 minutes in a stuck elevator with that doughy, sausage fingered douche-bag....

[Nye Bevan]

46. Romney, because religious nuts are the worst (nt)

[LiberalEsto]

47. I'd grab a couple of bean burritos, eat them

and sit down next to one guy, then the other in turns until they both got off the bus.