Our Aging Mothers - Call Them Today!
A sizable number of DUers are in the Baby Boomer generation. I was born a year earlier than that, in 1945, but I identify with the boomers. For far too many of us, our parents are gone. My wife and I are very, very fortunate in still having our mothers with us. My mother (father, too) is 90 years old. My wife's mother turns 87 this month. Both of them have their share of health problems, but still retain the qualities that are the reason we love them.
We live near my wife's mother, so we'll be taking her out for a simple dinner at a restaurant near the assisted living facility she's enjoying these days. My wife visits with her each day. My mom lives 2000 miles away, so I won't see her this year, but I'll be on the phone to her this afternoon. I call daily for a half-hour chat with my parents. I call at the same time each day, and they're always there to answer the phone. It's important to them, and to me. We talk about the day's events and about memories of past times. I never know where the conversation will go, but so it has been all of my life. My family talks. We always have.
Far too soon, my parents will be gone, and so will my wife's mother. I keep that in mind when I think I'm too busy to call and have a pleasant chat with her. I'm never too busy, I realize, to do that. At some point, I will no longer be able to do so. So I call.
Whatever your age, if your mother is still alive, call her today. Tell her how much you appreciate everything she has done for you. Tell her you love her. Even better, resolve to call her often. It's impossible to exaggerate how much those calls will mean to her. Ask her how she's doing. Tell her how you're doing. Reminisce a bit about the past with her. Each time you call, you'll make her day, and yours as well.
It's the least we can do, I think. Happy Mother's Day!
= new reply since forum marked as read
... she'll be 90 in a couple of days. I'll pass along your good wishes. 
Mother's Day, for a variety of reasons, has always been a prohibited topic with her. So I try to make up for that on her birthday.
-- Mal
MineralMan...
A truly perfect post for this Mother's Day.
My Mom, who lived with my partner and myself for the last 5 years, passed away January 23rd, one week shy of 94, after a fall in our house.
The woman was sharp as a tack and knew the family history better than anyone (anyone still alive) but the body wasn't so good. Macular, osteoporosis, lots of aches and pains...stuff like that.
But she LOVED visiting with relatives, friends and neighbors, going out to eat, getting her hair done, and shopping (Macy's, Target and QVC)...she had a great "fan club" but one of the biggest fans was our dog...he would wait and wait and wait for her to come out for breakfast every day and bark until he got some "toast crust" from her. I think the worst thing she ever said was "damn" once or twice...we had a running joke in the house amongst the 3 of us; if you couldn't find something just look on the floor because you had probably dropped it!
While it was SO much work (cooking, dishes, laundry, showers, pills, pills, pills and eye drops, 3 or 4 doctor appointments each month and more), the second I brought her from Portland, OR to Los Angeles, we would be happy to have her back in an instant...our house doesn't feel the same and we miss her terribly. We are still struggling trying to figure out how to put our lives back in order. And of course, there is still estate stuff to work on, not to mention her room, which is pretty much intact.
Call your mom today (and dad too), if you can...I don't think you'll ever regret it.
We Love You Mom and We Miss You So Much,
S, D and O
I have so many memories of things she has said in my head. Here's one of my favorites:
When I was about 10 years old, I caught a great big lizard in the back yard. A western alligator lizard. Thinking I'd give my mom, who was just 31 years old at the time, a charge, I took it in the house. Well, the lizard didn't enjoy being handled, and clamped down on the webbing between my thumb and forefinger.
So much the better to alarm her with, I thought, so I showed her the lizard, which had my hand in a death grip.
"That's a very nice lizard, Richard," she said. "When it lets go, go wash up for lunch."
Unshakable, she is. She never lost a beat. 
Too good
Like you I have loads of memories at my fingertips.
I was born in 54. You remind me of my dad, who until his mom passed at 93, called his mom everyday.
He is gone now and I live with my 88 year old mom. I know it's hard sometimes for everyone since she's in the beginning stages of dementia, but I tell my three sisters, one day she won't be here with us, so you have to just let it go and be glad she's here with us!
Thank you and please wish everyone a Happy Mother's Day!
Thank you for this post.
It was very frightening to me when they started to go down hill. Began to realize I was going to lose them fairly soon. (Denial is a great defense, but eventually butts up against reality.) Sadly, I was not with either one at the end. I almost made it to see daddy, but he passed an hour before I arrived.
I mean, I was only born less than 20 years ago. I called her anyways
Just uncorked the 2nd bottle of wine (at her behest). 
