Woman arrested For Biting Off Pit Bull’s Testicles

[Lancero]

Witnesses told police this week that they pleaded with Boone county resident, Audrey Ranch, 62, to stop hurting her son’s pit bull, but she refused.

“Eventually she bit Pedro’s acorns clean off right there in the front yard,” a witness said. “Pedro hightailed it screeching like a wild Indian and when I tried to subdue Audrey, she knocked me out with an old tricycle.”

Realizing the police had been called and knowing she had time to hide (it is a 45 minute drive to her house), Mrs. Ranch cut off a length of garden hose, dug a hole and had her son help bury her. She used the garden hose as a breathing apparatus.

Officers from the Boone County Sheriff’s Office arrived, unburied Ranch and arrested her without incident.

http://seriouslyforreal.com/more/woman-arrested-for-biting-off-pit-bulls-testicles-madison-west-virginia/

Guess WV is trying to make their own version of Texas Oysters.

[leftofcool]

1. Well, thank the Goddess this happened in WV and not Kentucky.

[In_The_Wind]

2. Is there a full moon?

[SoCalNative]

3. Seems to be a parody news site

[KamaAina]

6. I'm not so sure.

The story about the guy who spent $150,000 on plastic surgery to look like Kim Kardashian is the honest troof!

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018702198

[Fla Dem]

9. Some of the weird articles posted there are real events. So don't think so. nt

[stevenleser]

11. Local CBS radio affiliate seems to be carrying same story

http://kvil.cbslocal.com/2015/05/22/woman-bites-off-pit-bulls-testicles-then-buries-herself-alive-to-hide-from-cops/

Bizarre

[lpbk2713]

4. Sounds like a day in the life of the Wasilla Hillbillies.

[NYC_SKP]

5. This seems to be a trend, biting pibby balls, assault with trikes, burying with garden hose.

.

I swear, it's like every day someone somewhere does this.

[KamaAina]

7. Now that took balls.

[Fla Dem]

8. What a wacko. Glad the dog will pull through. nt

[Rex]

10. What. The. Fuck. ?.

There is nothing left to read about on the Internets...that is IT. DONE.

[smokey nj]

12. Fake or not, I just don't see the humor in this story.