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[TorchTheWitch]

This message was self-deleted by its author (TorchTheWitch) on Mon Jun 1, 2015, 10:34 AM. When the original post in a discussion thread is self-deleted, the entire discussion thread is automatically locked so new replies cannot be posted.

[phil89]

1. Still scamming? What about all that money your

friend in CA sent you to magically save you last time??

[alphafemale]

27. Yep. Kills me that some good people here love to be scammed.

Some people love to live off creating sob stories and taking money.

This person is probably doing this same scam on several sites and is raking in the cash.

[morningfog]

51. It's getting old to see the poster keep coming back.

[bettyellen]

52. And blaming every single person that she had made no progress at all.

It appears she has not been able to actually get herself to a single job interview yet. Or find a single food bank even though there are quite a few in her area. Or get on a list for housing. Three months of desperation with not a single concrete action to improve the situation is beyond me. I certainly would not be blaming others - I'd at least learn to google and pound the pavement every fucking day.

[alphafemale]

155. These sob stories should be delegated to a DU sub-basement.

So the DUlusional that want to coddle this shit and feed it are the only ones that have to see it.

[polly7]

159. I'd rather 'coddle' someone in trouble than post cruel shit that just

might drive them over the edge.

DUlusional is believing you know anything about what this person is actually able to do on her own. I don't get this need to be nasty. If you don't want to help, don't. Calling those of us who do care silly names just says much about you.

[alphafemale]

160. You are being conned. Period.

A more elaborate tale every damn month.

[polly7]

162. You don't know that.

You're not in her shoes, neither am I. I've been in a similar situation however, and I know how paralyzing fear, being alone, lack of sleep d/t worrying, anxiety can be. It messes with your mind. She needs help in the form of real human support and interaction - it doesn't sound like she's getting it at the moment. Don't judge if you haven't been there, and there's absolutely no need to be cruel about it.

[alphafemale]

164. lol. She'll be back with another contrived sob story in about 4 weeks.

If it were real the same imagination in improving her situation would be a fine thing.

[polly7]

170. If she's back in 4 weeks asking for help, I'll believe she still hasn't gotten the

support she needs. I don't know what she's had to go through in her life, but it sounds to me she's had things rough. Isn't it easier to support someone than tear them down?

[Tree-Hugger]

227. I think

It probably has more to do with name recognition than anything else. GFM seems to be the most popular model and people are just more familiar with it than other sites.

[ScreamingMeemie]

167. Apparently, there is a need to be cruel.

It is typically the loudest, most vocal of angry DUers, and I keep telling myself it is not indicative of DU as a whole. I believe, like you, there are psychological issues at play here. I haven't done it to this extent, but I am a "hole in the ground" ostrich at times when it comes to difficult financial issues, and the cruelty for the sake of being cruel is sickening here.

While TTW isn't doing the best of jobs in handling this, many of us wouldn't. But the need to post vitriol goes beyond. It can push someone over the edge.

[polly7]

177. Well said ...

I really don't think she's managing well at all, but for some in very difficult situations, asking them to do all the things, or even the first thing they need to to improve their own life is like asking an amputee to enter and win the 400m dash. She needs help. I had to see a psychologist to finally realize I was throwing my life away doing nothing, to get out of the trap I was in. Again, we're lucky here to have free and accessible mental health services, I don't know what is available for her.

[Jamastiene]

261. That is the key to me.

You never know what a person is really going through until you have walked a mile in their shoes. Scam or not, I'd rather see people who can help, help and see less of this vitriol. Bullying, which I think those types of posts are, is the very thing that can push someone over the edge. I'd rather not be part of that group that joins in on the bullying. I feel for TTW, whatever they are or not going through. I'd rather not say mean things when I don't know their situation. I've "been there" psychologically" as far as not knowing what to do and being at the end of my rope. Hearing hateful stuff like a lot of the stuff in this thread can't be good for someone going through a rough time.

[Texasgal]

166. Conned?

Out of what? five or ten bucks here and there? It's not like she's fucking DU over with millions.... hell, even thousands!

[Lilith Rising]

181. Whether it's a 'con' or not I don't know but

I will say that 'conning' people is work too. I mean a person actually has to work at it.

[trumad]

2. try a pawn shop.

[alphafemale]

31. This is a scammer. Period.

Grifter.

[cwydro]

36. A couple of weeks ago, I predicted

that we'd see another of these before the end of the month!

[KittyWampus]

75. weird thing is the same username has posted on other DU topics since then-

and those posts don't jive with these.

It's almost as if there are two people using the same DU account.

[betsuni]

93. About every 28 days or so -- like menstruation. nt

[alphafemale]

112. Some people have no shame in scamming people.

They prefer it to actually working and supporting themselves.

I would guess this person does this on a number of sites and lives quite well.

[cwydro]

129. I'm afraid I agree.

There're just too many inconsistencies and contradictions.

[NEVER SUMMER]

3. If you have TV and BlueRay player

Take it to a pawn shop, sell it, and you'll get about 50% of its original value or a bit more if it's newer.

You can easily pay the water bill with the sales of both and more gas money.

Do you have a cell with Internet service plan?

[cheapdate]

107. Pawn shops will give you 30% of what they estimate the item's resale value to be. n/t.

[TorchTheWitch]

117. oh dear, that's even worse that I thought

Is that for if you want to get an item back or get rid of it forever or does it matter?

[Tree-Hugger]

121. But it is better than 0%

You might do better on Craigslist. If not, a pawn shop is better than nothing.

[cheapdate]

136. It doesn't matter.

You can repay the loan with interest in a certain time period (usually 30 to 60 days) and reclaim the item. Or you can leave the item. Doesn't matter.

[JI7]

216. you said you don't use or need the items anyways so better to get something for it

than to just have it lying around. plus you said they were gifts so it's not like you are losing your own money on it.

[840high]

4. You have a decent amount in gofundme.

[TorchTheWitch]

73. it's not in there

Cripes, if only I DID have that money! Gofundme doesn't take into account what monies you've taken out at all. They only keep track of how much you have been donated over all since you started your "campaign", and it's THAT amount that is posted on your account page publically. I particularly don't like that at ALL because it makes people believe that that amount of money the public can see is there and available when it may or may not be depending on whether or not the person with the account has already taken it out to use it. Almost every bit of that money I already took out and used way back when I first was told here to set up a gofundme site so that people here could donate.

And once you first remove any of the money you're donated, gofundme continues to automatically send you whatever donation money you continue to get immediately though it sits pending somewhere in nowheresville until at some point between 5 - 7 days it lands in your bank account though the last time any gofundme donated money and sent it to me it only sat for 3 days in the "pending" nowheresville though my own bank sat on it for another 24 hours before I had access to it.

[trumad]

5. Dude you got 1211.00 in your Gofundme account.

[OKNancy]

6. I'm pretty sure if you withdraw the money, it still shows the total

.. I looked it up... That's what I get from the site.
( never donated, and won't, but was curious)

[trumad]

7. For how long does it show?

On edit...you're right.

[Omaha Steve]

22. Almost 8% of that went to gofundme & wepay even though it shows in her total

http://www.gofundme.com/pricing

Gofundme takes 5%. Wepay gets 2.9% plus .30 per donation.

Almost $100 when you round up.

Several people would not donate when TTW only had paypal which also has fees. And transfers are not done instantly. It takes a few days to get to her. When your broke, waiting can seem like forever.

OS

[trumad]

23. Thanks Steve...

[catrose]

219. Does anyone know why GoFundMe is preferred over YouCaring?

I chose YouCaring.com, which has no fees (unless you accept their "suggested" donation), when I started one for a friend. YC seemed to have all the linky goodness and stuff that you'd want from such a site. And you can use Paypal.

[NightWatcher]

8. I am not a fan of these panhandling posts.

I think these posts have gone way too far and that there are too many of them.

Please be careful when you donate and do not give more than you can afford to lose.

[roody]

26. Ignore is your friend. You can also not click.

[pintobean]

30. Or, one can just state their opinion

because it's a discussion forum.

[Omaha Steve]

9. I have verified TTW's ID, location, and circumstances!

I asked her to do that in a post back in April. Had I know she was going to post today I would have mentioned this early in the replies.

Marta and I are headed out to dinner. I will be back in a couple hours.

OS

[Omaha Steve]

57. I think I've made my point now

Last edited Sat May 30, 2015, 08:31 PM - Edit history (1)

I was nasty to TTW back in early April. It is in that OP several times. Things like move out and it isn't pretty.

Then somebody jumps me today. I wanted s/he to go back and read what I said in early April including asking TTW to let me verify some items. She trusted me. I verified enough to change my attitude and it shows.

She is down on her luck and in a bad place. Part of life.

Marta and I helped her the first time she asked for it. We have helped since I verified her situation.

Need I say more?

OS

[bettyellen]

58. Steve please delete the address. That is a shitty thing to do....

Last edited Sun May 31, 2015, 10:37 AM - Edit history (1)

By her own admission TTW has made approximately just 3 contacts looking for work in more than a year. It appears all of this was over the phone. No housing search, not even a single successful Google search for a food bank or any attempt to provide for Yoshi should she find herself on the street soon.

Unless she has severe cognitive issues, it is hard to reconcile his behavior with that of someone who is actually desperately needy. She refuses to help herself.

DUers have exhausted themselves finding her resources that she summarily rejects or ignores.
The situation- and help needed- is probably a lot different than what we are being presented with.

[Omaha Steve]

59. Fork in the Road address?

It doesn't exist.

[bettyellen]

60. Okay. Sorry.

[Omaha Steve]

62. IF that is the worst thing to happen to me it is a great day

[bettyellen]

115. Ha ha, great attitude, Steve!

[Texasgal]

76. It's Yoshi

not MOSHI.

If you cannot even get the dogs name right right why are you flipping about her not being legit?

[JI7]

80. are you serious ?

[Texasgal]

82. Yes. I am.

TTW has been on this board for over ten years, her dogs name is WELL known.

[JI7]

83. lol

[Texasgal]

85. What's funny?

Have you personally been fucked over by this poster?

[JI7]

90. i think it's funny you expect people to know the dog's name

[snooper2]

274. I've been here over ten years, I've posted my cats name

You get 2 guesses or searches


One hint, it starts with "S"

[bettyellen]

120. Corrected, thanks. Moshi is another animal I've met.

And not flipping out at all. I hope for Yoshis sake that TTW does a 180 and starts making a genuine effort to find employment. by her own words that really has not been happening, has it?

[treestar]

264. Some people's particular mental issues

Make them very hard to help. They muddle through on their own, then ask for advice and don't take it.

[cwydro]

63. Hey wow Steve,

Thanks so much for putting my pm out there without even asking first.

Real gentlemanly of you there buddy.

I would have given permission, but hey who cares right?

Wow. I sure hate when I have to totally revise my opinion of someone.

[Sheldon Cooper]

64. Those are PMs? They look like posts to me, with post numbers and everything.

[JI7]

10. can the people who gave you new tv and blue ray player help you out ?

also you should take it to a pawn shop to get some money.

[TorchTheWitch]

13. unfortunately not

I don't even know where that person is anymore. It was someone I sort of dated very briefly... actually it was more like he wanted me but I didn't want him. He was married besides, so it was a very icky situation I wanted nothing to do with. These gifts were essentially bribes that he wanted "payback" for.

I'd take all kinds of stuff to a pawn shop if I had gas to get to one. Do you have any experience with them at all? I thought people put their stuff in hock that they wanted back or something. I just don't know anything at all about them.

[JI7]

14. there are a few different ways, i was assuming you didn't want them back

which means they will just pay you for them . but if you want them back i think they will give you a little less for it and they will keep it on hold for some time period so you can pay back for it. i'm sure there are some terms , conditions etc where if you don't get it back within a certain time they can sell it .

on edit i think you can try to sell it directly using craigslist but just make sure you arrange any meeting with the person who wants to buy in a public place with lots of people around.

[TorchTheWitch]

20. I wouldn't want them back

Unless maybe I couldn't get a decent price for them by selling them outright. At this point I don't even know about that though. Is there any way to know if certain places only deal in certain kinds of items or if they're legitimate? I always just had a very sour feeling about pawn shops though I don't know why (movies probably). Still there's the issue of gas for the car. I've been hoarding every drop of it I can get just for job related stuff. Hell, I've been hoarding damn near everything including each and every square of toilet paper.

Craigslist really scares me. I'm just a little bitty person and the perfect mark for some nut to steal from me or kill me. I'm very doubtful I could even handle the anxiety over it even if I could convince someone to come with me. I'm already way overloaded with that as it is despite my meds. What I wouldn't give for medication to be a magic cure-all.

[PasadenaTrudy]

47. CraigsList?

Put up a free ad, meet them somewhere in public with lots of people around. Good luck!

Edit: I see that you are wary of CL. I'm a small female, I've bought and sold cars, etc. on CL in big ol' bad Los Angeles. No problems ever. Just meet in public and use some common sense.

[shrike]

11. I would go to a food pantry, pronto

Many churches have them. Most of the mainstream ones will not proselytize or judge. You'll be able to get food, probably toiletries, and they may know of where you can get dog food.

I've had luck selling items on Craig's List. (I don't need anything you're trying to sell, unfortunately.) Just meet the person in a public place and you shouldn't have much of a problems.

I also second the idea of a pawn shop. Might be easiest thing.

And your dog is gorgeous, btw.

[TorchTheWitch]

17. without gas though I can't go anywhere

I do get food stamps now, but they don't pay anything for stuff like toilet paper, soap, shampoo detergents, paper towels, etc. There's a food bank that's not in the city but it's still pretty far away that I'd have to have gas to drive to, but I don't know if they have anything other than food. This was something else that my case worker was supposed to do for me that she never did. I still haven't found out from her if there's anywhere if not that place that I can get non-food items. Just trying to get her on the phone is a nightmare. I can walk to the Giant across the street for any food with my access card, but it doesn't pay for any non-edible things or pet food. I don't even think that it pays for any over-the-counter medications and highly doubt it. I don't get much money with the food stamps though since I'm only one person. I've still had to REALLY scrimp on food and I'm getting very close to using up all the money they supply on the card for the month. I get that money again for next month on the 9th, and I might still have to go to the food bank for just food before then.

I REALLY hate to use what tiny bit of money I have for gas for anything else other than seeing about a job or getting to a job to work until I get a paycheck. I already had to turn down a one gig job offer because I had no money for gas to get there and no money to buy the two pieces for the uniform I'm required to wear. I HOPE they will still give me other opportunities for work that I could do if I can somehow find that money. I wouldn't even be paid for it for two weeks at least either since the people at the event don't tip, and th company pays the workers with regular paychecks. It's VERY different than the usual kind of bartending job that way.

The whole process of getting that kind of work has turned out to be vastly different than I'd been told. I'd been told that it was just a matter of "signing up" buying the tuxedo outfit and that I'd have all the work I could want. I'd also been led to believe that you got paid in cash after each one night gig. Nope. Most of them told me they already had all the staff they needed for at least the summer. Only two places had any interest in me at all, I had to fill out the usual paperwork and then wait for X many days for an interview, and one of them never got back about that. The other one was also the one I wanted to work with the most, and they did do an interview with me where I found out they only pay every two weeks in a regular paycheck though the pay is good, and you don't get any tips from the people that are at the event since they're open bar. Had I any money to live off of until I got paid I wouldn't care - most people get paid in regular paychecks anyway.

I live in a very middle/upper middle class area where there just aren't anything like soup kitchens or food banks or anything like that for poor people. The religous organizations in this area don't even know anything about soup kitchens or food banks or anything like that. I've called or been to so many of them already. If there's any poor people around here they're still driving nice cars and living in nice places or they're living with family or friends that are helping them. I don't know. Even public transportation barely exists around here. I'm lucky as hell that someone decided to build a Giant supermarket across the street or I'd not even have any way to get to the next nearest one without having to drive (and that one is grossly expensive). Welcome to "Pleasant Valley" suburbia. For people like me in this horrific situation it absolutely sucks.

[shrike]

19. Are you in Havertown, Pa.?

I seem to remember you are. Here's a website http://stjamesucc.org/Food_Pantry.php

They're in Havertown, and have a food pantry complete with toiletries. Their hours are limited, though. OTOH, you'd probably also have to drive there, which wouldn't be useful considering your situation.

That's a shame about the bartending gigs. I used to know someone who did something similar, but this was 20 years ago.

There's a post down thread about freelance work you can do at home. I also know people who take surveys on-line, earn a few bucks or something per survey. Something you can do at your leisure.

If I think of anything else I'll post it. Good luck.

[TorchTheWitch]

21. Yes!

I never heard of this place! Cripes, I could have gone there when I was practically eating cardboard waiting on my food stamps access card. I'll have to figure out where exactly they are though. And yeah, I'll have to drive there. Have to drive damn near anywhere in this town.

There are some things though I'm likely still going to have to buy like the stuff I need for my dentures both to clean them and since I still have the temporary denture (I was never able to afford getting the permanant one) I have to use this stuff called Comfort Grip so that it fits without just dropping out of my mouth. The temporary one is the one you get right after they yank what's left of your teeth out when the gums haven't had months to shrink and readjust. Even just a teeny bit of not having it fit perfectly can cause horrible constant gagging or not being able to keep it in your mouth at all. Even though I only had to have like 5 teeth pulled under my old bridgework my gums collapsed so much that without the Comfort Grip stuff my denture would just plop right out.... it's almost like it was made for someone else that has a mouth twice the size of mine.

I really don't know if this one catering company is just unusual in how they pay their workers or what. Could be that other places pay per gig, I have no idea. This one pays REALLY well though since most of their clients are the wealthiest of Main Liners. Even the places they have their events are just incredible. Hell, just the giant tents they use are incredible! I could happily live in just a portion of one of those tents all set up with giant balloons and special lighting and all that. They also said that most of their clients give the company a fat check as a tip for all the workers anyway. The company splits that money evenly between all the workers and adds it to the regular paychecks. Even though they only do events normally on Friday, Saturday and Sunday (and I would think all the catering companies are normally that way) people still work at these jobs as all the work that they do. One of the instructors at the bartending school said her mom has been doing nothing but catering bartending for years and years since it supposedly pays better than the average bartending job and she just likes the clients and atmosphere better. And yee haw, this particular company doesn't make anyone wear a bowtie! I was a bit worried about that since with my anxiety disorder I feel like I'm choking if something is snug around my neck. If I ever have to wear one I'm hoping that at least I could do it more loosely though I'm afraid I'd be tugging at it all the time. Maybe it would be something I could just eventually get used to wearing, I don't know. Just as long as it's not really snug.

I saw that post about doing some kind of work online. I'll look into that in the morning since I don't think I can consentrate well enough for doing whatever the tests are tonight. I got only a few hours of sleep last night, and after doing battle with the welfare office yesterday and the water company today along with so much other stuff I've been doing I'm soooo drained.

I think I should take Yoshi out for his nightly walk now that it's much cooler out, make him a hot dog or two, try to eat something myself and hit the bed. Actually, Yoshi isn't looking like he's very keen on even standing up right now, lazy bum. Once I start moving around he might decide differently.

Thanks!

[shrike]

24. Location

135 Myrtle Ave., Havertown.

Open every Wednesday 9 a.m.-12 p.m. No need to call ahead, just show up.

Here's something that could be important to you. From the website:

In addition to getting three bags of groceries (canned and boxed items, bread, baked desserts, fresh fruit, toiletries and household products such as laundry detergent, toilet paper and paper towels), a $15 Giant card is given (for the purchase of produce, dairy, meat or gas) each calendar month.

You could use the Giant card to either buy gas or dog food for Yoshi.

[inanna]

74. Shrike, what an excellent and helpful post!

+ a gazillion to you.

Looks like an awesome food pantry. I might even want to donate ($$) to them though I'm far, far away.

Also from the link you posted:

Anyone who has a child under 18 years old living with them who is celebrating a birthday is given the opportunity to create a birthday bag which consists of a cake mix, icing, candles, and a gift for the birthday that will be celebrated during the month.

Very, very thoughtful of this food bank. Ours are wonderful around here also, and I donate when I can. But when I see new ideas (like the above) it gives me the notion to mention it to volunteers at our local food pantries...

Here, sometimes the local bakeries donate pastries and cakes to food banks, and I know the volunteers mostly try to distribute those to families with young children, or for birthdays.

I really hope TTW utilises this service.

[Tree-Hugger]

99. +1

Great information for her.

[cwydro]

189. I wonder

if she made contact with this resource.

[Texasgal]

197. Well, considering it says it's open

on Wednesdays and this post was made on friday I don't see how she could have.

[cwydro]

198. Oh, my bad.

Poor reading comprehension and a lack of knowledge as to the day of the week lol.

[forthemiddle]

25. If you sell the stuff on Craigslist

Meet them at a gas station close to you (just don't tell them it's close) then sell the items, and fill your gas tank at the same time.

[bettyellen]

33. All food pantries have dry goods and personal care items.

It's been months and you haven't even googled food pantries in your area? Jeeze you could have got a bicycle from your local freecycle and saved months worth of food costs already. You should really go back to your old threads because there was lots of great advice and resources given that was also ignored.

[Fla Dem]

127. I volunteer at a food pantry, and while we do have some hygiene products, we only have them when

they are donated. We use whatever funds we have to purchase food. By the way, we were overwhelmed with the amount of food we received through the USPS Food Drive. Thank you all who donated.

[Tree-Hugger]

210. Same here

The one food pantry I used didn't have hygiene items for those who were not homeless. It was food only. There is another pantry about 15 minutes away that does have some hygiene items, but you can't utilize both places I am told. I'm not sure that is accurate. I had toiletries donated to me, so I never followed up on finding them at a food pantry.

A lot of donation drives I have seen focus primarily on food and not toiletries.

[TorchTheWitch]

145. of course - did that months ago

I have no experience whatsoever in that kind of work, and I've never seen anyone in there that works there that's older than their 20's. I think all the workers there are really nice and really helpful, but for whatever reason they aren't interested in hiring me for anything. I would love love love to work at the bar/restaurant across the street and applied there 2 years ago, but same problem with my age. EVERY bartending job I went after whether a dump or all the way up to the fancy places wuldn't give me the time of day because of my age, and all the workers are all kids. I've filled out applications that say right on them that they only hire part time workers and though they have no problem with scheduling arrangements because of a worker having school they don't ALLOW any workers to have any other job either part time or full time. What does that tell you? they won't hire any worker that needs to work for a living, and that's going to be kids. I can't even count how many places told me right to my face I was "too old". WTF???

In desperation and royally pissed off about this blatant discrimination I couldn't do anything about I called the guy that runs the bartending school to ask if he knw of any places that had very recently called looking for bartenders and told him about why I wasn't getting a job. That's when he told me about the catering bartending and emailed me the list he had of loads of those places. He told me just to "sign up" with a few of them and buy the tuxedo outfit and I'd have more work than I could do since their busy season was just starting. That was in March, and only a couple of days later I got the eviction hearing noticed taped on my door and had to drop everything to deal with just that. Nevermind that the scumlord never served me a Notice to Quit beforehand which is absolutely required by PA law, and nevermind that at the hearing I brought that up, the ass of a judge asked her if she served a Notice to Quit (which was right on the damn form she had to submit to get the hearing in the first place) and she said she didn't, and instead of canceling the hearing right then which he had to do by law and the hearing not allowed to have even been scheduled at ALL by law he just ignored that and went ahead with the hearing.

I explained all that before here along with excrutiating detail about the rest of it with the appeal of the eviction judgment and the whole reason for it and what I had to find out the hard way yet I was accused of lying and trying to scam people and Lord knows what other shit since I never read any more of that sick crap once it started. That on the heals of being utterly abandoned by my own family got me a hair away from jumping off a bridge. I hope they're proud of themselves.

The month I have now that I was able to buy with a miracle in the the 11th hour thanks to an old friend and roommate in San Diego from 25 years ago (1987 and '88, so whatever the math is), and thanks to the lawsuit the scumlord filed against me that I had no other choice but to file an Answer on my own and FINALLY finished with that whole mess just the Friday before this last one due to the mess with having to file as a pauper again, wait for that petition to be granted again and then go back to the court to pick up the timestamped copy of my Answer/New Matter/Counterclaim to serve on the scumlord's attorney. I also had to do battle with the welfare office just to get food stamps and medical insurance that my family talked me into along with all the other government services that turned out to be false promises and shit anyway before they bothered to let me in on they're not wanting to do a damn thing for me that I was STUPID STUPID STUPID to ever have listened to in the first place. But what else do people do in an epic crisis and needing help do but turn to their family they THOUGHT they had. For weeks now they've believed that I'm already on the street after losing everything I have but the shirt on my back, and have a single one of them bothered to try to contact me in any way? No. They must be relieved they don't have to bother thinking about me for any reason. Technically I have a family, but all they really are are people that are related to me by blood. That's it.

There just isn't anything left I can do anymore that's going to stop my being thrown out on the street with nothing. I don't even know why I'm still fighting anymore. Even getting a job isn't going to do much of anything since how does one KEEP a job when they're on the street with nothing? I won't even have a place to go to the bathroom. I just can't face the reality of that without having to make the mad sprint to the toilet I still have for a little longer and turn myself inside out. I've lost so much weight in just two months the my jeans I wore in February that were so snug I often had to undo the top button fall straight down to my knees now, and I have to keep them up with my underwear straps wrapped over the waist... well lower hips actually now since even my underpants are getting too loose. Anything I eat usually goes flying to the other end or comes back from wence it came. But I force myself to eat every day anyway and hope for the best especially after a few weeks ago when I got dizzy and face planted into the kitchen trash can, and blood all over. I still think I hadn't actually broken my nose and the blood was from having some little bits of skin just inside one nostril get scraped out. In any case, for now I'm just trying to deal with just the day that it is at the time.

[riderinthestorm]

171. TTW, 8 years ago you were a stripper. Now you're too old for bartending jobs??!!

TorchTheWitch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu May-18-06 12:23 AM
Response to Reply #436
498. TEN dollars?
TEN whole U.S. dollars???

Honey, you're talking to a stripper... I wipe my ass with ten dollars.

Ten dollars... geeezzz, it's an insult.

You know this doesn't compute right?!

[cwydro]

195. Thanks rider.

This is one of the inconsistencies that are so obvious.

The posting style is so radically different as well.

[Texasgal]

205. Is it at all possible

that someones emotional health has maybe declined over the years?

[betsuni]

202. And in 2012.

There was a HOF post about a feminist stripper, "Is This Wrong" and TTW says she's a stripper.

[polly7]

204. So??? nt.

[Texasgal]

206. Right?

Digging up shit from 8 years ago or even three is really desperate and ridiculous!

I've changed over the past eight years, who hasn't?

[polly7]

209. I don't even understand why her history is important at all.

I worked many different jobs .... I was in a horrible situation during all of them though. I've definitely changed in the last few years - probably not for the better (I happily don't care anymore!). I understand that some doubt her, but digging up anything from the past is strange. She needs help now.

[Texasgal]

214. Exactly.

I'm really confused as to why anyone would pull up shit from years ago. Shit happens, things change! Jaysus!

[polly7]

217. You said it waaaay better than me! nt.

[riderinthestorm]

231. Now her story is she can't get a job bartending because she's too old

This constant shifting of the goalposts isn't helping her "win" over others to help her and its contributing to the suspicion.

She was fit and beautiful enough 8 years ago to brag that she wiped her ass with $10 bills and now she's too old for a bartending job so yeah, send more $$.

This just does not compute and its not helping her here...

[betsuni]

211. So to go from a physically demanding job a few years ago

to saying that people are telling you that you are too old to hire now seems odd.

[Texasgal]

212. That's not odd at all.

My husband worked an extremely physically demanding job for years until he was getting to old too be climbing ladders and getting underneath houses.

What's so weird about that?

[riderinthestorm]

233. A bartender works harder than a stripper. It's heavy labor

and her explanation is she's considered too old by other employers not that SHE can't handle the job.

It's just another excuse to not be employed and it doesn't particularly pass the smell test, especially in light of her fairly recent past.

She's not helping herself by now claiming age discrimination.

[polly7]

213. I don't think most people understand how anxiety, insomnia, constant worry, depression, etc,

are physically exhausting to the point you can't focus or concentrate, or even think normally, let alone make life-altering decisions. You feel exhausted, all the time. You don't see yourself as able to do the things you once could - whether it's reality or not. Quite possibly when she was in a physically demanding occupation she wasn't so far down that black hole. Even during my worst times at home I still played hockey and ball, coached it, worked full-time jobs - until the point came I couldn't even leave the yard anymore. I was still more than physically able to do it all - obviously, as I continued on after I started getting well, but I'd lost every bit of confidence in myself. It's very hard to explain.

[Tree-Hugger]

225. Giant

I would give Giant another try. It certainly couldn't hurt anything.

Giant doesn't have a policy of hiring only teens and college kids. I am very familiar with the company from an employment standpoint and there are people of all ages that are hired within all departments.

Give it another go. The company routinely cycles management staff, plus each store has several managers. Your next application may end up in better hands.

[Fla Dem]

130. Seeing there is a Giant store across the street from you, have you applied for a job there? Would

seem pretty logical. If high school kids, moms and retirees can work a register, staff the bakery and deli counter or stack shelves, I would think you would be able to as well. It's convenient, even if you have to work late shifts. You can walk and you may even get a discount on your purchases. Please tell me you have applied for a job there! If you haven't, I would question your desire to work.

[cwydro]

132. This is a great post.

I don't think the op is looking for work.

[snooper2]

277. That would be impossible since there is NO Giant located in Havertown PA

http://giantfood.com/store/locator/?_DARGS=/WEB-INF/jsp/store/locator/store-locator-form.jsp.refine-search-results

[Fla Dem]

278. According to TTW: " I can walk to the Giant across the street for any food with my access card, but

it doesn't pay for any non-edible things or pet food. "

http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=6749273

[shenmue]

12. Shared

Hang in there.

[ScreamingMeemie]

15. Go to these two sites...

www.crowdsource.com
www.eZdia.com

Register, and then read and take the writing/data tagging/etc. tests. It's freelance work, but CS pays daily for work that clears before 5 p.m. directly into your PayPal account. eZdia pays weekly. You don't have to interview; you just have to pass the tests. If you can't write, there's data tagging, labeling and whatnot. If you don't game the system, you can make a good deal of money to get you over $48 bills, dog food needs, etc.

[TorchTheWitch]

18. will do

I'll try damn near anything.

Thanks!

[underahedgerow]

32. I agree with the Craigslist angle on selling your goodies. Just only accept cash, don't send

anything in the mail, meet only in person, and as the other poster suggested, at a gas station.

Google your item first and see how much it's going for used, etc. Short, simple descriptions, no rambling, no story, no history, just sweet and simple.

"BLU RAY BRAND for sale for X dollars. Never used, new in box (unwanted gift). Cash only, no mail or shipping, in person sale only please. Haverton area."

Etc.


You'll be ok, good luck with that food pantry!!! You're getting there!!!!

[Lilith Rising]

41. Off topic, but thanks for the leads to

those 2 sites!

I just submitted my writing assessment to crowdsource (2 of the other categories I was interested in weren't 'hiring' at the moment) but it takes 2-3 business days for them to decide...

And just for general information - it took me all together (including reviewing AP writing style guidelines) a few hours to complete the assessment as there is research to be done, etc.

[TorchTheWitch]

69. what sort of writing is it that they're looking for?

All they have left that's available no is the writing. All the other things you can't even take the test for since it says they're full and need no one else now. For the writing though it says they want 3 writing samples of 100 words each, but I have no idea what sort of "writing" they want, and they don't say. I have no idea what a writing "sample" would consist of, and whether or not I already have something I could submit or if I have to write something from scratch now.

For the future if there is any way in the world that I won't be on the street which I don't think I have a prayer of now this would be really great as something I could do for extra money, but for the short term I don't know. It says once you submit these writing samples it will take them 2-3 business days to decide whether or not they approve of them, too. As of now I can't even say I'd still have internet service at all then since I don't yet know for certain when my ISP will be taking the money out of my account, and as of now my account is nearly entirely empty. This is for the crowdsurfing site anyway. Since the other one wouldn't pay for a week anyway for the immediate future it can't really do anything, but I still need to look at that one anyway.

What is "tagging" and "labeling" or anything else they do? I did find out I can't do the transcribing because I don't have transcribing equipment. And I used to to sooo much of that all those years I worked in offices.

[Joe the Revelator]

71. Your service provider will not shut you off for one missed payment.

You have at least 60 days.

[TorchTheWitch]

72. I do?

That's a huge relief! Wouldn't I get a fine from the bank for a bounced check though if they go to my account to take out the money for the bill and I don't have it in there?

Verizon doesn't let you pay for FIOS without this automatic payment they do through my bank debit card since I don't have a credit card at all. And right now I've never wanted a credit card so much since I might be able to get the cash to save my life in time.

[Carewfan]

86. Can't you downgrade your FIOS?

to maybe something with DSL if you can live with just streaming.

FIOS is fiber optics and is usually pretty pricey. How much are you paying per month?

[Tree-Hugger]

100. Agreed

Downgrading to DSL would be the cheaper option. Sometimes, even just calling and asking for a downgrade will get you a discount.

If you switch to DSL, they provide the modem. I do believe all the newer modems have wireless capabilities. Bonus of you have an internet phone.

[Carewfan]

110. Yes, they provide the modem, but they also charge the lease costs of the modem

I am more than willing to send TTW a new, easy-to-configure DSL modem that is capable of doing the job.

I do this for a living, and I don't mind sending TTW the DSL modem for free.

[Tree-Hugger]

118. I have never been charged

Is the charge part of their DSL charge? There is nothing on my bills about a lease fee. I have been through 3 modems over 8 years with Verizon at no extra charge.

[Carewfan]

119. Yeah, Centurylink does..

But we bought our modem, got rid of the $10 lease charge.

I do know Comcast also does this, and you can opt out of that too with a DOCSIS3.0 compatible cable modem.

[Tree-Hugger]

122. So far, Verizon hasn't.

I got my first modem with them 8 years ago, so maybe there was an additional set up charge then that I don't remember. My last two modems were replacements through them at no extra charge.

[TorchTheWitch]

111. we don't have DSL in this area

I don't know why because aparently we used to. I went from having dial-up to FIOS since other than that all that was left at least at the time was Comcast and I'd already heard so much about how bad they were. When I first went to upgrade from dial-up I wanted DSL but found out there isn't any DSL in my area anymore. Since at the time I'd already gotten all kinds of junk mail from Verizon that they had put in the fiber optic cables all over the area so people could get FIOS that's what I got. Their customer service utterly sucks though, but it's only crapped out a very few times and except for one time not for very long. I don't find it to be very fast at all though.

I don't get any pay tv or have a landline since I got rid of dial-up, and just getting rid of the landline all by itself was most of the FIOS bill. Ever since I got a cellphone I don't need or want a landline and only still had it just for dial-up internet until FIOS came to town.

In any case, I think I'm pretty sure I'm already at the bare bones of what FIOS offers since I know I went with the bare bones when I first got it. I've never upgraded anything in the years I've had it though they plague me with emails and junk snail mail about upgrading or getting FIOS tv and all that other crap. I've always been at the bare bones with my cellphone, too.

Off the top of my head I can't even think what the hell Verizon charges me every month... I'm just so used to the payment automatically coming out of my account. And I REALLY hate that they make you do that. All my other bills I get a paper bill in the mail for and have to pay it by mail or by phone and always know that a bill is going to be due soon after I get it in the mail. I HATE it that Verizon has just been hitting my account on random dates almost all over the damn month. I had gotten accustomed to them doing that somewhere between the 20th and 30th of the month, but last month they didn't hit my account until something like the 5th of the month when I'd thought they'd surely already done it. It's only been lately that I've ever done online banking at all since I've gotten so low on money that I need to check my account all the time to check what's in there, what bills are due, etc.

Ok, I just found an old bill floating around my desk area, and the monthly bill at least for that month was $75.99. That's pretty much what I agreed to pay per month when I first signed up and the same amount that I know they hit my bank account for the beginning of May when I thought that they already had. I remember just to have my old landline the bill without any additional calls I would have had to have paid more for was somewhere between $55 and $56. Having the FIOS was a lot cheaper than paying for the landline plus the dial-up internet service.

Is this a huge amount for "high speed" internet? All the junk mail I always get from Comcast gives "huge discount" offers that are $80 something or more. I know my next door neighbors had first gotten FIOS when it was available here, thought they didn't like it and switched to Comcast, but immediately switched back to FIOS again and still curse Comcast all the time though that was years ago.

Everything is expensive in this area though. Gas, food, electricity, rents, real estate for buyers, the lousy public transportation we barely have at all... just everything. I just never knew that it was since I've always lived in this area. I've lived in a lot of different towns or other counties but never all that far from Philly.

Does FIOS even do anything that isn't just streaming? Any video I watch is all streaming anyway whether it's a YouTube video or a news site's video or whatever. I thought all of that streamed for everyone anyway. I always get a lot of buffering crap, too. I'm a total boob when it comes to this kind of stuff. I know how to do the things I use the computer for, but other than that I'm lost.

[Tree-Hugger]

123. I suggest

....always being aware of how much your bills are. Automatic debit is easy, but staying on top of your budget is extremely important. It is good to go over each bill as they come in every month. I have caught errors on a couple of bills.

Edit: I am in the next county. I don't pay anywhere near $70 for a landline and DSL. Our area is FIOS loaded as well, but DSL is still an option especially since the modems have the wireless router as well.

[TorchTheWitch]

250. what do you use?

I mean what DSL company? I've not been very keen on FIOS and I've never felt that I've gotten anywhere near the service I should for the fat price tag. It seems to get slower and slower as well.

The customer service is absolute HELL. I wasn't until finally a little over a year ago that I could even get a bill in any shape or form or even an account number! It made me so crazy. How in the world can a company charge you for a service and not give you a monthly bill is SOME form? For the first year that I had it I would get a bill through email but the formatting was completely messed up so you could hardly read it, and I STILL had no account number! It's only been a little over a year that after many many many calls over the years telling them to send me a paper bill every month in the regular postal mail that anyone finally did it. Ove the years I was given a different set of numbers as my account number every single time I called that was anywhere between 10 and 19 digits. It wasn't until I finally got that first paper bill in the mail that I finally found out what my account number was.

That and they're taking the money for each month out of my account totally willy nilly as to what date that occurred has been a HUGE problem. If the bill is having to be paid automatically on my debit card then how the hell am I supposed to know what that money is taken out of my account?

As for the landline, I live in a specific area with just how Verizon maps out what is considered local calls and what areas are toll calls that make no sense at all. With just the local only according to their map I could call places twice as far away but couldn't call those places 5 minutes away just because the towns included in my local range were all in one direction into places I had no reason to call and those places I did and that were much closer like Ardmore that's right the hell next door to my town and I can walk into was not consider my local area and would be a toll call. So I had to upgrade my free call range just to be able to include Ardmore where the only dial-up number for my internet provider was located so I wouldn't be charged a toll call by connecting to the internet when I had dial-up. Where I live Verizon and Comcast was just all there was for high speed internet and neither one provided DSL anymore for this area. I think this was the first area that got Verizon's FIOS cables - fiber optic thingies.

I searched for any company here that provided DSL because I didn't even know what FIOS was, and with all the junk mail we got bombarded with I didn't like the prices especially since having FIOS internet and tv and just internet were practically the same damn price. But I wasn't going to pay one damn dime for tv I don't even want. I don't watch tv and haven't for longer than I can remember. I've never gotten cable ever in my life, and if reception on my tv with just those few channels that were free I just didn't watch any of them. Since I've had a computer anything I would use regular tv for was already on the computer. Yet EVERY DAY I still get junk mail from Verizon trying to convince me to get FIOS tv or FIOS tv, internet and phone. If I even had a landline I wouldn't plug a phone into it. I love it that the only calls I get are calls that I want on my cell. Even with the no call list I still got bombarded with sales and other junk calls on my landline and it's all the calls I got. I was never so happy to get rid of the landline, and if I needed one for DSL that's all I'd use it for just as I did when I had dial-up.

Just about a week or so ago I got a piece of junk mail for some internet provider I think may have been call Exfinity or something like that which was way cheaper than FIOS, but since I'm not seeing any way I'm not about to be thrown out of here, what do I care about internet access to this house once I'm not in it?

[Tree-Hugger]

271. I have Verizon

Your account number is your phone number plus a couple of digits.

I'd suggest ending auto debit payments and switch to sending in a check each month. That way, you can send it close to the due date.

[Joe the Revelator]

101. Yes you'll get a fine, but you'll have 60 days to use the internet to make some cash

Post your stuff on Craigslist
Check out 'The Mechanical Turk' on Amazon
Spend 20 minutes making a writing sample and get some temporary transcription jobs (use google if you need examples of a writing sample)

[ScreamingMeemie]

77. A lot of people transcribe without it.

As for the samples, I thought they gave you prompts. I've not seen the new test. I've been freelancing for them for over 6 years, and when I started with the company (under a different name) I was grandfathered in to writing. You might want to ask the other DUer who has responded to this post. She/he doesn't seem to have had a lot of issues.

Lots of the people who do work for them work from Starbucks/McDonalds/the library because Internet is a luxury, or they like to get away from the family.

[Joe the Revelator]

102. This. There is so much free wifi out there.nt

[Ms. Toad]

104. They give you prompts for the writing.

Just start the application process, and the prompts will show up when you get to the right screen.

[Lilith Rising]

141. I went through the process myself Saturday morning.

Friday night I simply clicked through as if I was going to take the assessment and all of the instructions are right there complete with links to examples and the AP writing style guide. Decided to get a good nights sleep and went through the process in the morning.

It did take a little while - there is research to do - and I'm not used to 'sales' type writing but it's not difficult at all.

[ScreamingMeemie]

147. As long as you tie a benefit to a feature, I'll fall immediately in love with you.

You've got this.

[Lilith Rising]

149. I'm pretty sure I did but...

it felt so corny and over the top! Lol

Actually it was a lot of fun going through the mental database of adjectives

[Tree-Hugger]

168. Thanks for this information

Every little bit helps and I am going to look into this for myself and a couple of friends who are struggling. Thanks for sharing the links.

[ScreamingMeemie]

169. If I can help you in any way, please let me know.

I've done work for CrowdSource (when it was CloudCrowd) for about 6 years now. It pays the mortgage, my health insurance and it keeps food on the table.

[Tree-Hugger]

208. Thank you

I am definitely going to check it out this week and do their required writing tests. I am fairly good with writing so I am hopeful. I will definitely give you a scream if I need more information.

[renate]

255. good to know

Thanks!

[ScreamingMeemie]

268. You're welcome!

Good to see you!

[PowerToThePeople]

16. ..

[IVoteDFL]

28. Can you apply at a temporary agency?

I'm in a pretty similar situation and they've saved me quite a few times. I normally call 3-4 of them and get to work within a day or two. The great thing about temp services is that they usually pay every week. That can be a lifesaver if you don't have 2-3 weeks to wait for your check. I temped the last six months or so and it saved my apartment. Anyway good luck. I'd give if I could.

[TorchTheWitch]

88. I tried that but still trying

That was the first thing I thought of since it saved me MANY times in the past between jobs, and I got a couple of permanent jobs out of it. The first thing I did was go straight to the three agencies I used to get plenty of work from and immediate work from and found out they no longer exist especially the one that I always got the best temp work through and did it as fast as I called. Actually, two of those places technically still exist though they've had name changes and don't do anything with office work anymore. One only hires "technical" staff, and the other only hires medical staff.

I did find about 10 other places outside the city though that do office temp placements, but every one of them told me that because I've not worked in an office environment for about a dozen years now they wouldn't be able to find anything for me, which I think is nuts... I can type, answer phones, file, etc. and back when I didn't know anything about anything when I was young I started working in office work through temp agencies to begin with. Some of them also insisted that I had to know Excel and Powerpoint or they couldn't do anything for me, which is also nuts since I've NEVER used either though ages ago I piddled with them a bit just so I had an excuse to put that on my resume.

Though I know the best places to get immediate work with an office temp placement agency is one of them that are in the city though I don't know who they are anymore since those would more likely be the ones that fill law office temp jobs which is what my resume is more geared toward anyway and where I wouldn't need Excel or Powerpoint anyway (and why I likely never used either in the past). I also couldn't even go to any of the city agencies since though at the time I probably could have afforded the gas to get there and back I couldn't possibly afford the astronomical parking fees. I don't even know how much that would cost now since I haven't had to do that for over a dozen years. Back than it was at LEAST $20 to park even 10 blocks away from the building you were going to for just an hour.

I've called some of the city agencies and emailed my resume to a couple of them but so far I still haven't been able to discover who the hell the agencies are now that supply most of the temp work force for the law firms both in and out of the city. Back when I did it, there was really just two agencies that they normally used, and one of them only supplied temp workers that were attorneys or paralegals but not any of the lower office staff. I've been trying to find a law firm locally that still gets a physical copy of the Legal Intelligencer newspaper since whoever these agencies are now would have prominent ads in it, but so far nowhere I've asked still gets the physical paper since the Legal Intelligencer is online EXCEPT for being able to see the ads. Just going through their classified section for available jobs (which is how I got permanent jobs almost exclusively back then when it wasn't another firm that wanted to steal me) I've not been able to figure out who these agencies are now as pretty much all of the help wanted ads are from the law firms wanting to hire their own selves.

I suddently just finally got the idea to just call one of the law firms I know of and even worked at before and ask what agency they use for temp placements. Monday that's another thing I need to do, but now I still don't have the money to go to them and fill out paperwork and be interviewed even if they have any interest in me at all since I've not worked in an office for so long just for the gas and that evil parking money I'll have to spend, and it just has to be a LOT hire now than when I used to have to do that.

Geez, I don't even know why I'm still looking for a job now at all since I can't see how I could keep one once I get thrown out onto the street. How do I keep going to a job with no way to go to the bathroom or shower or have a place to sleep or ANYTHING? All I know is that despite what's coming I still have to keep fighting.

This is the whole reason why I did the eviction appeal in the first place - so I could still have a roof over my head for however long I could while I got a job and earned the money to hopefully be ABLE to move somewhere else. It was either that or be physically thrown out and everything I have taken by I think the sheriff's office (everyone keeps saying the "constable" but neither the township nor the county has anyone by that title) who then sells it all at auction and KEEPS whatever money they get from my own stuff since once I'm thrown out anything left on the premises is legally considered no longer mine though at least the scumlord doesn't get it, but she could still bid on anything at the auction.

Had I not done the appeal that would have happened in roughly 15 days. It depends on how fast my scumlord ran to court and filed to have it done, and I KNOW she's likely long since already had any paperwork to file already done and with her attorney who is right around the corner from the courthouse and will immediately dispatch someone to file it. ALL she wants is to get me out of here and put some other tenant in here paying the rent so she can pay the mortgage for the house she lives in herself. That's ALL a tenant here is FOR to her. And since the amount of the rent miraculously is almost exactly what the amount of her mortgage for the house she lives in is it's no wonder why she has never spent a penny to fix a damn thing in here either ignoring problems entirely or having incompetant family members she didn't have to pay "fix" things. The more I find out about this women the more of an utterly heartless completely evil viper I find out she is. And of course, the only way I had to find out was after she already filed the eviction, and a whole lot more I never knew until after I'd already filed the appeal.

Once Wednesday, June 3rd passes without me paying the court again which I have just no more hope left to be able to do just to buy a single month to work and use whatever money I get to rent some other place and move out of here it's going to be only about 10 days or so that I'll be thrown out physically, everything I have confiscated since everything in here is considered no longer mine at that time, and I'll be on the street with nothing and nowhere to go. I'd have to use that 10 days to find a place for Yoshi if I can so he won't have to suffer being on the street with me. And I just don't have the strength to do that. He's all I have, and it would be like giving away my own child, my own body guard, my meds, my mind, my heart and my soul all rolled into one, and I just can't do it. But I'll have to somehow. Excapt that I can't even think about it without being physically sick and entirely losing my mind, so I have to stop thinking about that now.

All I can do now is just to try to keep fighting though I don't see how it will do any good anyway and try to deal with just the day to day needs to do that. It's either that or just drop dead. Ironically I'd far rather just be dead rather than keep waking up every day still stuck in this absolute hell.

[bettyellen]

125. If you have less than two weeks before they take a your shit, sell what you can next weekend ready.

Put ads up for Craiglist and clear it out. You know you can't take it with you, and youre desperate for the cash. You'll get better prices than you will with a pawn shop too.

[Joe the Revelator]

34. Not to be that guy.....but aren't posts requesting money from the user base at DU...

required to have Admin approval?

[etherealtruth]

37. No

Here's a link to an ATA response by Skinner

http://www.democraticunderground.com/12597822

[Joe the Revelator]

39. Got it.

Maybe the rule changed, or maybe i was just wrong.

[etherealtruth]

40. I think "back in the day" you needed permission

Not sure ... I just remembered reading this

[Joe the Revelator]

42. OG 4 Lyfe

Thanks for the link.

[CTyankee]

35. are you strong enough to work for a group like "companions and homemakers"?

You could sign on to work at homes where there are elderly people who need a little help but want to stay in their homes. It would be light housekeeping and cooking and driving them to doctor's appointments. I so appreciated the help my elderly mother received when she was really too old to handle a microwave, or even a coffeemaker.

You could explain your situation to them on the phone and see if they could arrange transportation or interview you on the phone and see how it goes. Something is better than nothing at this point.

[TorchTheWitch]

191. as I am now I'm not so sure

I've had so much trouble with my whole digestive system that I've lost a ton of weight I can't afford to lose. After that dizzy spell I got weeks ago and face planted into the kitchen trash can I'm already worried about any more. I've always had super low blood pressure and normally can't just jump up from, say, a squating position when you have to read a label of something in a store on a bottom shelf or I get really dizzy when I stand up and have to hang onto the shelf and hang my head down until my blood pressure catches up. Evevators are a nightmare for me unless they go fairly slow and stop at almost every floor. If I get in one that zooms up many floors I'm already in a heap on the floor. I'm always having to hang onto the those railings in an elevator since you never know what it's going to do. Normally, as long as I'm moving around I'm ok.

I've always been hopeless around little kids, or old people or ill or infirm people. I always have a weird feeling that I'll do something accidently that would hurt them or something. It's a bit like the same feeling of being the bull in a china shop that I'm about to break something or knock over a whole shelf or something. I can't think of a way to describe it, but it makes me tense and that I'm somehow in the way or taking up too much space or something. Is that actually a phobia?

I know I have to do some kind of job that occupies my mind even if it's just drone work. So long as I'm sticking papers in a copy machine or whatever I'm good. The worst of the worst jobs I've ever had to endure were the temp jobs where I had absolutely NOTHING to do. I'd be begging people to give me ANYTHING just to be doing something. The busier I am the happier I am. I'd FAR rather be rushing around crazy with a million things to do rather than twiddling my thumbs staring at a phone that doesn't ring and making paper airplanes just to have something to do with my hands.

[Lilith Rising]

196. Dizzy spells like that can be indicative of anemia.

I had the same thing going on a few years ago and it nearly killed me.

Anemia can be easily remedied (assuming no serious underlying causes) with a vitamin supplement. Just something to think about...

[TorchTheWitch]

234. nah, it's my crazy low blood pressure

Both me and my sister have always been like this. Hers went away after she had her first baby and got really heavy.

I was in high school before I finally figured out that not the whole human race went through what I did. I thought I was just really unlucky to do my passing out and big dizzy spells in public. My meds actually help to raise my blood pressure a bit so it can actually be found. All my life doctors and nurses have gotten that puzzled look on their face taking my blood pressure and the mercury was going waaaaaay down yet they still didn't get anything yet. They think it's funny to tell me I'm a corpse. Mostly it's that issue of changing positions too fast. And the damn elevators.

I probably am anemic now though with with the sudden big drop in weight and lately with all the massive digestive issues. And there's Yoshi making perfect doo-doo like clockwork every time and rubbing it in strutting the yard or even doing a victory lap after yet another perfect poop. I'm so envious.

[REP]

238. No, it's pretty normal with hypOtension

I'm pretty sure my BP is lower than the OP's and has been all my life. Headaches, syncope, etc are pretty par for the course.

[Lilith Rising]

240. Just mentioning it because

my bp was always normal until the anemia became apparent and at the same time my bp dropped into super dangerous territory.

[REP]

241. My normal is shock for anyone else

It's about 80/40, and I'm in Stage 3 kidney failure - and I'm not a "tiny little thing" like the OP. (People in kidney failure usually have super high BP.)

[CTyankee]

201. You need an ENT to get to the bottom of your dizziness. I am going to one tomorrow

for my own dizziness spells. My pcp lowered the dosage on my bp meds as my blood work was showing too much sodium was being washed out of my body by the diuretic. My dizziness is better, but not gone. Since dizziness is an inner ear problem I got the referral to the ENT.

I've had dizziness from drugs I've had prescribed to me. You might want to take a look at yours, if you have any, and ask a doctor about how they may or may not interact. You can't really work if you are dizzy so your health and well being are pretty much basic to your getting a job.

[CTyankee]

207. another thought: volunteer to do some office work in a charity you like. You will get

out and be useful which is what you want to be. The more people see you interacting with other staff and doing helpful, productive work the more they will valuable in your job search. It will add to your resume also, so places you apply to can see you have been busy and keeping up your skills.

Also, go back to the family members you think are approachable and offer to pay back every dime of what you borrow to get you at least started. My daughter did that when she was desperate for her mortgage payment or would lose her home. Of course, I waived any repayment because I'm OK, but still, if I hadn't been OK it would have been a good thing.

I really think you should reconsider your family members at this point. Something is better than nothing.

[TorchTheWitch]

249. Jesus, what my family has put me through is already bad enough

They don't believe a singe word I tell them. They just think I'm nuts, that I'm somehow too crazy to hold a job and this whole situation has been my own fault. They still truly believe that government services are magic that does everything, and the only people on the street are really crazy or on drugs/alcohol.

They already believe I've been thrown on the street weeks ago, and not a one of them has tried to contact me in any way. I've gotten screamed at that how dare I make them worry, and two of them have not ever said a single word. They've been talking about me behind my back since the whole eviction issue first came up and repeatedly have told me that the best thing for me is to lose everything I have and go to the poxy shelter that even giving them website links still didn't convince them that it is continually full with a long waiting list. I can't believe they ever looked at those links. How the hell anyone could imagine that would be best for anyone I can't fathom and have argued with them about that endlessly feeling like I'm talking to someone with no brain cells. Of course, if it was any of them it would be the world's worst disaster.

Fuck them. They've caused me more agony and mental torture than anyone else other than the scumlord yet they also keep telling me that they're biggest concern is my mental health. I've not even seen any of them for seven years. I wasted more time and all to my mental and emotional detriment trying to keep them updated with everything that was going on and that who the hell did they think was taking care of me other than my own self for all these decades. I only wish I'd known a long time ago that I have no idea who the hell these people are and that they haven't ever given one flying fart in the wind about me. I have no doubt they're relieved that they no longer need to remember me.

Even my case worker begged them for just a loan for one single month, and they didn't even believe her. They harped endlessly that only my getting a case worker could possibly do anything at all for me, and once I told them what she wanted to do (this was after the first time I met her and thought she was great) they suddenly decided that she was full of it yet out of the other sides of their mouths insisted that my case worker was all I had and that I had to trust and rely on her. It was like an on going argument with the most obvious dipshit trolls on DU. Ignoring them entirely was the best thing I did for my mental and emotional health, and I kick myself for all the time I wasted on them. Were I dying in the middle of the street they'd either step over me or kick me out the their way. Had I only known years and years ago they thought of me as a thorn in their side, and I've never asked anything from any of them.

I don't have a family, I have several people that are just related to me by blood. Should I somehow survive this I will never acknowledge them ever again. They're dead to me.

I need to get to bed. I have a ton of things to do tomorrow. I just have no idea why I'm still doing them when I already know it won't do a damn thing. The only thing I can possibly think of is making Yoshi a legal and registered ESA and get some kind of reasonable accommodation to keep us from being thrown onto the street.

[CTyankee]

265. But is volunteering to do some office work at a nonprofit organization impossible ?

They might be able to "ride share" you to work. You'd be at least doing what you can do and being more connected with others who might be able to help you further, i.e., get you a paying job down the line...

[zappaman]

38. I donated to this charity in your name...http://www.changelives.org

http://www.changelives.org

It's a great group that I work with helping the homeless get jobs.

You're welcome!

[bettyellen]

45. Interesting group! I try to keep my donations as local

As possible. Luckily a lot of groups collect groceries in front of the supermarket nearby, which is awesome. Otherwise I'd have to look up where they are on the net or something!

[zappaman]

50. Thought something positive could come off this monthly thread.

[Pooka Fey]

43. Contact Info for your local Feeding America Food Bank

Feeding America is a really good organization, really serious. They might have other services to help you get back on your feet, besides the food banks. I would give them a call.

http://www.feedingamerica.org/find-your-local-foodbank/

On edit: I saw that you're in Havertown PA, here's the website for your local Feeding America Food bank "Philabundance" at 1-800-319-FOOD (3663)

http://www.philabundance.org/

Good luck to you.

[Pooka Fey]

44. 14 week culinary arts training program at Philabundance, 81% job placement rate

The career-targeted 14-week program provides nearly 500 hours of culinary arts training and also offers exposure to guest chefs, catering opportunities and off-site internships. The result is an 81 percent job placement in the food service industry. In addition, retention services are offered for two full years to ensure that students maximize their training and maintain positive work ethics. - See more at: http://www.philabundance.org/programs-2/philabundance-community-kitchen/#sthash.VzgTNxAz.dpuf

I was checking out the Philabundance website, it's really well done.

[Tree-Hugger]

103. Philabundance

They are an AMAZING organization.

[bettyellen]

46. Are you thinking having Moschi declared medically necessary will somehow help you find housing?

I don't get how the two are connected? how is that going to help your housing issue?

[ScreamingMeemie]

49. This gives me pause as well. An emotional support dog is not the same as a service dog.

And only true service dogs trained to perform an identifiable service can't be denied access to a homeless shelter.

[bettyellen]

53. I feel like this is another distraction when a daily job and housing search

Should be the focus, and it definitely is not.

[840high]

56. Probably the only thing in her

life that she loves and loves her.

[polly7]

48. I hope things get better for you soon.

I lived out of my car off and on after leaving a very abusive long-term situation - it wasn't fun, but it was summer, thank goodness! and I found a place that let me shower any time I wanted. I did it while finishing off my EMS courses - it was costing me so much to drive back and forth every day - I'd sold my horses and limited myself to one meal a day - not driving so much was the only way I could manage it. I could have asked my parents for help, but I wanted to do it on my own, and I did. I was lucky though that I could have gotten help from family - I'm sorry you don't have that option. I sent you a bit to your email account, sorry it's not much at all and I wish I could do more.

Please take some of the really good advice from people here - your life can change. It can be terrifying not knowing which direction it might take, but you have to jump in the water or you'll never know. Best of luck!!!!

[NaturalHigh]

66. Wow, I never knew you had to go through that.

[polly7]

68. When I look back, except for having to sell my horses :(

, the only things I owned that I really, really cared about ..... it wasn't that bad, and actually kind of fun at times. Much, much better than what I'd just left.

If you've reached your absolute bottom, like I had, you have to do whatever you can to change ..... being stuck in the same place is slowly dying.

[DawgHouse]

92. I'm sorry about your horses.

That would be really hard. I'm glad you are doing better.

[polly7]

137. Thank you DawgHouse.

My horses were rescue babies I'd saved from the meat truck at various auction-marts. I'd trained them for a few years, so they were able to be sold to good homes and I knew the people I sold them to would take good care of them. I saw one a few months ago - his owner is a 14 y/o girl using him in barrels with her 4-H club. They looked great together.

I was much luckier than TTW however, the money I got from them helped put me through my courses.

[beaglelover]

61. AGAIN!! JESUS CHRIST!!

[alphafemale]

151. So long as the gravy train pays the rats will return. nt

[stage left]

65. Hi TTW

I just sent you a little. Hope it helps. --Jay

[NaturalHigh]

67. For anyone who doesn't want to donate...

Maybe just avoid hurtful comments toward anyone. Grown-ups can donate or not if they choose. There's no need for some of the nastiness we've seen in this situation from time to time.

[stage left]

70. +1

[TDale313]

78. Couldn't agree more.

[marle35]

84. Agreed

I can understand being tired of reading these posts. But the outright nastiness and insults are uncalled for.

[MrMickeysMom]

87. Absolutely right NH...

Some of these comments are too critical. Jeebus...

[840high]

96. ...^ that

[H2O Man]

79. pitiful

[JI7]

81. what happened with the offer of help from msanthrope ?

[Boudica the Lyoness]

97. Was that the person offering TTW a free place to live?

Or was that the person who lives in California, the old friend, who send her that large sum of money?

[JI7]

98. i think the offer of a free place was a totally different offer

the person in california is something else also.

here is the last thread

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10026621811

[riderinthestorm]

124. Yes DUer Corgigal offered TTW a place for her AND Yoshi in Charleston

supposedly TTW's Dream location, for a year while her son was away.

Star Member Corgigal (3,604 posts)
125. Do you have to stay in Phili?

If you want a change of location, I have a bedroom available. I live with plenty of cats and doggies. My son is away at college, so he won't be using it for over a year.

I live In S.C., near Charleston.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10026621811#top

But alas...there aren't any bartending jobs there doncha know.



Instead of using the windfall $ from the old friend in CA to get herself out and to a safe location like Corgigal offered, TTW stayed put in the crap house with the slumlord and is now back again hunting $$ and turning down every suggestion less than a month later.

After 3 months of this, I'll admit, it's getting hard to give this any credibility anymore.

[polly7]

131. You know what?

As kind as some people have been, and so generous with various offers ... when you're facing having to leave your only safe haven, as bad as it might be, the environment one has gotten used to, for some, it can be terrifying. The stress, anxiety, fear - often hopelessness - can literally leave you feeling paralyzed. Your non-decisions and actions may seem 'crazy' to someone else, but they come from a place that very few really know unless they've walked in that person's shoes. I choose to give credibility to anyone brave enough to ask for help - the alternative and possible consequences are frightening and sad. I believe this poster may be very depressed, and things that may seem easy to you or I (at this time ... once, I felt exactly the same) may seem to her like mountains to cross.

No one has to give a cent, but tearing down someone's spirit is cruel and unnecessary - especially if they are in need. You don't know. I don't know. It doesn't hurt to be kind. Your post just might be the inspiration that strikes enough of a chord in that person to really help.

[riderinthestorm]

133. You are 100% correct.

i haven't written off TTW...yet.

But after 3 months of "paralysis" without seemingly utilizing a single suggestion, I think DUers are probably growing weary of the drama. If you look at my posting history on this with TTW I've been one of her supporters.

With this latest OP however, I'm less worried and more skeptical.

She's in trouble. No doubt. But these OPs aren't going to help her moving forward any more imo. She's doing more damage to her position here and in RL it seems.

[polly7]

134. That's the thing with feeling afraid to the point you can't do what you need to.

Everything does get worse. It's a vicious circle and you're trapped in it. Asking online and getting all of this great advice is one thing, she needs real-life emotional support to do it though. If she doesn't have family/friends nearby to get her to see that she does need to push herself out of this, she needs a therapist/psychologist/professional who can get her to see how self-defeating inaction is. We're very lucky here, mental health help is available and free ... I'm not sure about resources there.

I just feel so bad for anyone trapped like this, and I don't believe it's being done intentionally.

[riderinthestorm]

140. You are a kind soul Polly!

[polly7]

142. TY, I'm just someone who's gone through sort of the same thing.

I think most here are kind souls, including yourself ..... it's just hard to understand the decisions and non-decisions of others unless you've really been there.

[polly7]

163. You're so right.

It's easy to post and post online, that is something manageable for almost anyone. Doing the things you need to in real life however can seem almost impossible alone.

[catrose]

194. Thank you, Polly. The paralyzing terror of doing ANYTHING!

I've been there, and I know that doing anything--washing one dish, walking around the block--can break the chain, but doing that one thing can be so hard when everything seems overwhelming, when you've been beaten down so far that you can't imagine anything working out ever again. And then getting the courage to do another thing! Especially if the first one didn't work out!

I hope TTW can find someone close by, at least by phone, to provide support in those kind of tiny baby steps. One phone call, one application, one walk, one anything, until there's a body of work to change the situation.

I wish you'd make your posts an OP. Then I'd be sad that I could recommend it only once. Even sadder, not everybody wants to learn (either compassion or recovery), but if only one person did, it would be grand.

[polly7]

200. THIS post should be an OP.

You've described exactly what it feels like ....... and I'm really sorry you've been through it. In my case, it was do something or possibly die, yet I still couldn't take the steps I needed to. I needed help to figure it out, as strange as that may sound to anyone else. You're so right about being beaten so far down that you can't even see a future, let alone make one happen.

My heart goes out to TTW, and I hope the same for her as you do - very good advice, and exactly what the doctor I finally went to told me. Eventually everything becomes clearer and you realize the life you've been living is not normal, good, enjoyable or anything 'normal' people have, and you start to want it bad enough that you take those steps. But it's so hard to do alone, definitely, she needs real support and I too hope she can find it - there are so many good links posted here that may possibly be a life-line for her.

Such a good post, catrose.

[catrose]

218. Thanks, Polly

I hadn't thought of making it my own OP--it sounds obviously responsive to me; so if you want to quote and cite, that's fine. I'll be thinking of ways to make it an OP.

[SheilaT]

91. Really?

No fast food places, no retail establishments in your area?

Oh, and I didn't find it all that hard to find employment after I'd been out of the workforce for 25 years raising kids. I had basic office skills, took all the stupid tests I had to at the employment agencies, and, how bizarre is this? There were temp jobs available.

Also, your emotional support dog is NOT the same as a trained service dog, and I seem to recall that in one of your threads a few months ago you mentioned Yoshi would attack strangers who came into your house. That is NOT a dog that should be around other humans. Period.

You have shown up again right about when I expected you would.

How about you actually do something realistic about a job. There are jobs out there, unless you live in the middle of the Sahara desert, but you don't. Get retail, get fast food, get something entry level, and stop trying to scam us.

Oh, and bite the bullet about your precious dog and turn him in to a shelter. Yeah, that sounds harsh, but this crap about all of a sudden he's your emotional support dog is brand new, and I'm not buying it. Oh, and sell your stuff on Craigs List or do a garage sale. It's cash in hand.

[KittyWampus]

128. There are rescue groups for her breed of dog. Several in her state, in fact.

[Butterbean]

245. I'm just squinting so hard at this whole thread.

I really can't believe this is going on again, although I shouldn't be too shocked. It's the same m.o. as all the others: helpful suggestions offered by the pantload, excuse after excuse after excuse and "yes, but..." ad nauseum as to why all those helpful things won't work. I wondered what would happen after her miracle friend from California swooped in and saved the day last time, and now I guess I have my answer. Kitty Wampus has told her about a rescue group for her dog no less than 3 times, and has been ignored every time. It's like she's talking to thin air.

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Seems to me that we have that going on here with both the OP and with people donating to her. Enabling isn't healthy for anyone, and it's a shame to see people enabling this behavior, but we're all adults here and are free to do as we choose. Extremely frustrating all around, though.

[Puzzledtraveller]

95. I was a social service caseworker in Kentucky

from 2008-2014. I left to go back to school. I know how hard it can be but you have to really want to help yourself. I know you have heard that enough times but it's a reality you cannot escape. I was in a similar situation about 7 years ago. I had my identity stolen by who I thought was a friend, fraudulent credit was spent, they filed a bogus tax return that netted them 5k on my name, had me so depressed I turned to drugs and was living in a basement covered in dog excrement while they lived it up upstairs. Eventually they had no use for me the threatened me to leave, too embarrassed and no place to go I finally went home. I cleaned up, got myself together and went out and got a job as a family support caseworker, filed the reports involving theft of my ID, the report with the IRS, was able to get a one bedroom apartment. I had to ask for help, like you, and it was given by many people, but I had to really want to get out of that hole because I began to fear that this was it, that it will be the rest of my life. Since then I met my wife, had my first child at 41 and am in school for computer programming. It took me this long to find out what I wanted to do. In my time as a caseworker I was able to see many who came from the same place I had come, some from places far worse. Some of my clients, with help, and compassion were able to go that extra mile on their own to get what needed to get done. Some of them through no fault of their could not and some did not try at all, how do I know, because some would tell me so. Bottom line,if you can get up and get on, you need to get up and get on it. If I were close to you I would help drive you to appointments or interviews, anyway I could but coming here will not get it done for you.

[Tree-Hugger]

105. Mturk

Go to www.mturk.com

It's called Mechanical Turk and it's run by Amazon. Don't turn away and get discouraged in the beginning. You have to do some crappy work (like transcribe receipts) for pennies when you start, but once you build up experience there you will have a lot more offered. It"s good for weekly gas money. They can pay you direct to your bank account.

Craigslist is scary, but another poster recommended meeting up at a gas station. You get cashvfor your stuff, you fill your tank. A lot of people do meetups in police department parking lots.

Use the $23 left for gas. If no gas is preventing you from job searching, then investing that money into your gas tank can help you get to interviews.

Sign up for Indeed.com and similar job sites. You just need to enter your application information once and then you can apply for a whole bunch of jobs.

Saint Vincent de Paul Society. Every Catholic Church has info on it.

If there is a YMCA near you, you can apply for financial information for a membership. You mentioned upthread that you worry about having a job if you can't shower. The Y has showers. In your situation, you would qualify for an extremely discounted, or free, membership. I am quite poor myself, but both me and my husband work and have income. Our monthly fee for a family membership is $7.00 via their financial assistance program. It's worth looking into.

I have been in hopeless places and have had many doors slammed in my face. I know the frustration of not being able to find work despite everything, but you have to keep fighting. I know what it's like to say, "yes, but..." When people give advice or try to help because it's something I have already tried and failed. It is frustrating and demoralizing, but you have to keep the chin up and keep fighting. Don't give up.

You may want to look into animal shelters and rescues to see if they have any resources for providing pet food to low income people.

[catrose]

152. Good ideas. And for Yoshi

Our local Meals on Wheels provides pet food too.

[Tree-Hugger]

106. oDesk is another one

odesk.com is another get paid to write site.

You write well. Crowd source and oDesk may be options. Give them a try. The worst that happens is that they reject your writing and you are still in the same place. Buuut, you may end up with some gigs. Don't worry of you will be paid soon enough because potential money is still better than no money.

[Katashi_itto]

108. How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.

This to the people that have behaved poorly here.

[sketchy]

139. Amen to this

And some of them are longtime members, and should know better.

[pintobean]

150. I won't pass judgement on who "should know better"

because there are years of history involved, as well as the last three months.

[catrose]

192. There's a Jewish version of that too

Something along the lines of giving when you're asked--that's between you and g-d--and what the recipients do with it is between them and g-d.

Sorry I don't remember the pithy saying, if there is one. The writer of the book that I found it in was very proud of his daughter because she thought of a solution to the problem of street people asking them for money when they walked to synagogue. Instead of rejoicing that she couldn't carry money on the sabbath and so could turn down these beggars, she began carrying bags of chips and the like so that she'd have something to give when asked. I'd rather be that girl.

[justamama83]

109. What about applying at Wawa?

They are practically on every major street corner- and a lot of times within walking distance. They are always hiring.

[Recursion]

113. There's a common Western misunderstanding of the concept of "Karma"

Last edited Sun May 31, 2015, 02:32 PM - Edit history (1)

People talk about "good karma" and "bad karma", with the idea that meritorious actions bring some sort of "good credit" to one's soul, while shameful actions bring a "bad credit" to one's soul.

The result of this idea (and I've seen it many times here) is a hope that "karma" will have Donald Rumsfeld re-incarnated as an Iraqi child (or the equivalent on the right).

But, in the vedas, that is entirely not how karma works. There is no good or bad karma; karma is simply attachment. Donald Rumsfeld is not "punished" in the next life; he comes back as literally the same thing he is now, over and over and over again, until he learns and gets it right.

By Western standards this is intolerable, but it is the basis of Hindu metempsychosis. One faces the same situation, over and over again, until one learns and is ready to move on.

Vivekananda perhaps said it best: "Life is a lesson. The lesson will be repeated until it is learned."

I offer this statement gratis on this thread, with no implication of to whom it does or doesn't apply.

[DawgHouse]

114. Thank you for the explanation.

[Depaysement]

158. +1

Interesting and educational.

[SheilaT]

135. Notice

how TTW almost never responds to genuinely useful suggestions.

She apparently has a lot of posters on Ignore. I'm one of them, according to something she said in her earlier thread. And once a month she comes back, freaking out that she and her dog are going to be homeless, and there's always an excuse for why she has done nothing to get a job. Or move from a slum that is apparently located in a relatively affluent area and yet has no DSL. She's been holding some brand new electronics (double tape deck? Really?) that she could pawn or sell on Craigs List and somehow hasn't a clue how to do that.

I'd suggest she be banned from DU, but I'm beginning to look forward to these monthly threads as pure entertainment.

[MoonRiver]

138. What's sad is how many people have been conned out of their hard earned money.

[MineralMan]

146. Please stop calling the OP a con artist.

That's overwhelmingly rude, and I'm quite sure you do not know that person. If you don't wish to donate, don't donate. There is no excuse for attacking her in this way. Please think before replying to requests for help. If you can't or won't help, leave it alone, please.

Thanks.

[alphafemale]

154. OK a grifter then.

A person with no sense of shame that lives off the sweat of others.

[MineralMan]

173. Personal attacks on other DUers are just plain wrong.

You have no way of knowing whether this request for help is legitimate or not, so to attack the poster by calling her a grifter is based on zero information. Please don't do that on DU.

[alphafemale]

175. You'll see another elaborate beg in about 4 weeks.

No shame in that one.

[MineralMan]

176. So? Don't donate, then.

There is no excuse for rudely calling that DUer names. None. Do you somehow feel that it is your responsibility to notify DU of your suspicions? Why? You directly call the poster ugly names. Why not just hide the thread or put the poster on Ignore?

One other poster in this thread has had a post hidden for insulting name-calling. Personal attacks are not in any way in keeping with DU's community standards. Yet, you've come back into this thread again and again to make them. You even replied to a post of mine that was not directed at you with yet another attack.

[alphafemale]

180. You are not at all bothered that you are giving money to someone with a nicer car than you?

That lives in a nicer house than you.

That is laughing at you?

[Texasgal]

182. Ermm..

have you seen that house?

Pay attention to the links before making a wildly incorrect statement please!

[MineralMan]

183. Who did I give money to?

I did not say I sent any money. I said that it's rude and offensive to call people names on DU. That is a fact.

Whether or not I gave is none of your business, frankly.

[ScreamingMeemie]

185. ^This.

I don't often agree with you, but when I do, it's epic.

[ScreamingMeemie]

143. She responded to mine. What I have noticed...

The absolute inability for people to trash a thread they don't like. Everyone here is a grownup. The fake "I'm worried about people being scammed out of their hard-earned money" doesn't play with me.

I am not generally in agreement with TTW on all manners of issues here at DU, but this pile-on is insane and not something I'd ever thought I would see on DU. It's schoolyard mentality against someone I've suspected for quite some time has issues with coping. As you've stated, I'm guessing she has a lot of the people she hasn't replied to on ignore.

For the love of Dog, people, hide the fucking thread and move on.

[SheilaT]

248. Are you kidding?

Hide this thread, or put TTW on ignore and miss all this entertainment? Not on your life!

[CTyankee]

144. as a follow up to my earlier post, it occurred to me that you might try being a live-in

helper to an elderly person. You would have use of their car and you wouldn't be on the streets. They might even be ok with the dog. You might get some part time work during this transition, but at least you would have an address.

Once you get some work, look for ride share opportunities. I was in a car pool down in the DC area before the Metro was built out further from the district. It was actually a good experience. We had great conversations, including those "how to handle the boss/coworker" chats (we all worked in different places and one person had a parking space benefit where she worked). We got to use the car pool lane on the highway going in so it was a short trip. We all saved money, too.

I'm just thinking you'd be better off not trying to go it alone. Think in terms of networking your way into some better situations. More contact with others can help you.

[Nye Bevan]

153. The only positive is that she has not been spamming folks' DU mail like "Stewert" (nt)

[Loryn]

156. I hope TTW can find what she needs.

There is a lot of information here that can help. There are also a lot people here who feel this is a scam. I don't know.

I have always felt if someone asks for help, and I have something to give, it's my job to help.

[ScreamingMeemie]

165. .

The world needs more people like you. Everyone is a grownup here and can make their own decisions. If I don't want to or can't help someone, I don't. A few have taken this as an opportunity to be cruel, and that is unfortunate, but I don't think it's indicative of DU as a whole. At least, I hope not.

[suffragette]

172. Have you tried contacting the Women's Resource Center yet?

I agree with CTYankee's post that networking could help you. It's hard when you feel alone and stuck. The local connection alone could be positive for you.

This Center looks like it provides services and referral as well as support groups.

From what i can tell, it's in your area.

They list low and no cost assistance for many services that would be helpful to you. Usually that means sliding scale, so it's likely no cost to those in serious need.

Their calendar has meetings for career counseling and groups such as women in transition in career.

http://womensresourcecenter.net/

http://womensresourcecenter.net/programs/career-services/

http://womensresourcecenter.net/calendar/

NEED HELP?
Contact our Helpline at [phone].

The Information and Referral Helpline is the gateway to all of Women's Resource Center's programs and services. In addition to information about our programs, you can call for access to help in your area for a wide range of issues, including legal issues, employment, mental health, parenting, relationship issues, health care, addiction, reproductive health, financial assistance, housing, and personal development.

We are here to answer your calls.

Monday - Friday 9:00 a.m. - 4:30 p.m.

To get connected, call [phone]

MISSION
Women's Resource Center (WRC) is a registered 501©3 nonprofit that supports women, strengthens families and builds communities through information, referral, counseling, legal, and educational services.
PROGRAMS
The WRC offers programs based on needs it identifies in the community. Our current programs include:

Information & Referral
Legal Services
Counseling
Career Services
Girls' Leadership
Parenting Support
Women Veterans Initiative
LOCATION
The WRC serves Southeastern, PA including Philadelphia, Montgomery, Chester, Bucks, and Delaware counties.

Many of our programs are offered at our Wayne location - 113 W. Wayne Avenue, Wayne, PA. We also partner with local businesses and organizations to hold our events at their location.

[Texasgal]

174. This is EXCELLENT!

What a great post!

[polly7]

178. +1,000,000 .... nt.

[suffragette]

184. I posted the link in a previous thread, but maybe it didn't stand out enough

or was buried by so many posts.

So I thought I'd post again and add more specific info and links.

I'm job hunting myself right now and it can be isolating and discouraging.

[polly7]

186. Such great resources, I really hope she looks into them.

It was so kind of you to do all that research.

Best of luck with your job hunt! You sound like a good, intelligent soul any employer would be lucky to have. The right one will come along.

[suffragette]

187. Research and writing are two of my stronger skills

I plan to look into some of the online free lance writing opportunities that have been posted in this thread.

Thank you for the encouraging words and the hug!

[Lilith Rising]

193. If you hadn't noticed upthread...

I submitted my assessment to crowdsource yesterday morning. It took me a couple/few hours but I wanted to do the best job possible so I took my time about it.

It was very self-explanatory and kind of fun too

Good luck with your job search and thanks for reminding us about local women's resource centers!

[suffragette]

226. Thanks for the info Lilith

Welcome to DU!

I will be looking into this more. Let me know how it goes for you.

Love your user name

[Lilith Rising]

235. You're welcome and

thank you for your welcome to me

I think I did well on the assessment but one never knows. I've checked out (and have bookmarked) the other sourcing sites that have been mentioned in this thread and so far I like the feel of crowdsource the best.

I'm in a transitional period right now wherein I can't really commit to a 'regular' job, and I'm planning on going back to school too, so this is the sort of thing that will work for me perfectly now and in the future.

My evaluation/acceptance (?!) should come through by Wednesday...

--- your user name is nice too ---

[CTyankee]

188. That is wonderful of you. I hope TTW just starts calling/contacting and continually

following up all leads. My stepdaughter is a reform rabbi and I just read the monthly column she writes for her congregation and talks about the old Jewish tradition of helping those coming to you for food and assistance. She might try a local reform temple as well as Catholic Charities. You never know where your next helping hand will come from.

[suffragette]

190. I share your hope that TTW follows up on resource leads.

I agree with you about helping hands. You don't know where they will come from or when you might need one yourself in the future.

Your stepdaughter sounds wonderful.

Nice to chat with you for a moment. I used to post to some of your Friday Challenge threads and
I so miss those.

[CTyankee]

199. My stepdaughter is great. Altho I am not Jewish I think I love its rituals better than

any others. Jessica really gets to the heart of the matter with her commentary. Her ordination ceremony was very moving and had me in tears of joy.

And thanks for the kind words about my challenges. I do have another art thread for this Friday around 5 pm EDT if you'd like to drop by...

[suffragette]

230. As a lapsed Catholic, I have a soft spot for rituals as well.

The scent of incense always transports me to a soothing and calmer space.

I'll be seeking out your Friday thread.

[Tree-Hugger]

232. Stupid question

Do temples typically have food banks and such? I am Catholic (ish) and often refer people to Catholic Charities/St. Vinny de Paul. I am ashamed to admit that I have never thought to tell someone to reach out to a local temple. I think I am so used to my own faith's efforts that I had blinders on.

[CTyankee]

267. well, I'm not sure in my stepdaughter's case but knowing of her strong support of

social justice, I'm sure she's actively involved in Interfaith efforts on behalf of the poor and needy. Her article spoke to the biblical imperative for Jews to participate in such efforts, and spoke of the ancient Israelites in the desert for whom food and water would be an absolute necessity. It is the religious definition of hospitality, also quite important in the Benedictine Order (I make reference to it here http://www.democraticunderground.com/10026713029 in my essay on the painting of the wedding feast at Cana by Veronese).

[Tree-Hugger]

269. Thanks for the info

I was educated primarily by Fransiscans and their offshoot O.F.M. order. The subject of social justice was woven into our daily education and faith formation quite strongly.

By the way, I have always LOVED your posts. They are fun and informative and I look forward to them.

[CTyankee]

270. Thank you! I'll be doing another art post this coming Friday at 5 pm EDT...

please drop by if you have a chance...

[Tree-Hugger]

273. Absolutely :) nt

[TorchTheWitch]

203. yes

I grew up in Wayne and already knew about it. There isn't really anything much that they do. Their legal services are only for divorse or custody issues, and all the career services are helping people write a resume or do an interview which is not something I need any help with though I can certainly see why there would be people that do particularly women who've raised families and weren't in much of any position before to need to work and take care of themselves and/or their kids.

Regardless, I'm still going to be thrown out very soon and lose everything I own though for some reason I'm still fighting to not have that happen and just trying to deal with each day that is and the VERY short term needs. I mean days. The only possibility that MIGHT keep me from ending up on the street is Yoshi being made a legal medically necessary emotional support animal (an ESA) though I still can't find any legal information about that pertaining to this particular circumstance. I know now what me and my shrink need to do to get that done which isn't much and easily can be before they come to throw me out, but I have not been able to find out anything at all if it CAN keep us from being thrown out of the street with absolutely nowhere to go. Logically, from just what the basics of the Federal law say it should keep us from that happening and my still having him, but I don't actually know for certain.

[PasadenaTrudy]

220. Call them anyways

it can't hurt. Maybe they've added more services than the ones you are familiar with.

[ScreamingMeemie]

221. Emotional support dogs aren't the same as trained service dogs, and I fear

you are relying too much on that being so. If Yoshi was a trained service dog, a shelter couldn't turn you away, but service dogs cannot keep a person from being evicted from privately held property. Emotional support dogs have no protections like that.

[TorchTheWitch]

222. I know the difference between an emotional support animal

and a trained service animal and a therapy animal.

It isn't a matter of not being evicted but of being thrown on the street. I haven't BEEN evicted since the eviction judgment allowed me to stay here as long as I paid the scumlord X amount of money in just a few days I had no hope of paying. If I didn't pay it in time or file an appeal then I would have been thrown out of here on the street in just about 10 days from the last day I had to pay her the money and didn't.

The ONLY reason I did the appeal at all was to keep from being thrown out onto the street losing everything I have. The appeal hearing isn't until November, so if I could afford to I could continue to pay the rent to the court that they put into escrow until the appeal hearing. NEVER. The longer I'm stuck here the more physically sick from the stress of being stuck in this situation I get. My whole plan was to get a job immediately and make as much money as I could with one single month before I'd have to pay the court again and move somewhere else and just default on the appeal. The appeal has never been anything else but the only option there was to just buy a little time to get out of here with somewhere to go TO. I don't care how small a place it is or how dangerous a neighborhood. I don't even care anymore about most of my things though I'd like to get the basics out and be able to store some stuff somewhere so at least the township won't get it. Most of the stuff I've accumulated for the years I've been here they can have and do whatever the hell they want with it.

Being stuck here means still being stuck in this utter hell of a situation. I want OUT of here and have wanted out of here for several years but never had the money to do it. Renting another place means having to pay the first and probably last month's rent as well as the equivelent of a month's rent just to sign a lease. I'd still need a job and at least probably about $2100 just to sign a lease unless maybe I can find something even cheaper in a crappy neighborhood. I've already LIVED in a crappy neighborhood since I moved in here over 10 years ago though it's gotten a good deal better. Unfortunately, the worst people live next door to me. Over the years I just got numb to how bad this street was though it's significantly improved than what it was like when I first moved in. The shit I've had to put up with with just my next door neighbors alone has made me barking nuts and would have made anyone nuts. At least the cops aren't here every couple of days for one or the other or both anymore.

It's just that nothing worked out they way I'd hoped, and giant obstacles were constantly put in my path. I made the epic mistake of listening to my family that I HAD to get help from government services when I should have given them all the finger and kept looking for work. Of course, that wouldn't have done a thing about the lawsuit I had to Answer myself or the scumlord harrassing me and sabotaging my car. I KNOW her only point to the lawsuit at all was to force me to spend my time on it so I couldn't spend it looking for a job or working at one. SHE believes that I want to stay here indefinitely though I have no idea why after the shit she's put me through and I'm still stuck with as long as I'm stuck here. Had I had just a piece of floor somewhere with Yoshi and a bathroom to use and somewhere for most of my stuff to go other than the vital essentials I would have BEEN out of here already. But I DON'T have anywhere to go since my family abandoned me and won't even hold on to my computer or personal papers, none of my neighbors can take me in since they either are living on the thin edge themselves and/or haven't anywhere to put me living in homes that are packed already with people. I don't know anyone else since the friends I have live in other states and my social life has always been through my work which suited me just fine.

As for what I've learned about an ESA that's legal and registered they are legally just as medically necessary as medication, a prosthetic limb or whatever else is medically necessary for a person and can't be forced into a situation where they can no longer have that medically necessary thing because that medically necessary thing can't survive. My having a legal and register ESA would be just as medically necessary as my meds, and I can't be forced into a situation where I can't have my meds as the animal is prescribed just as meds or anything else that's prescribed. So, if I can't legally be forced into any situation where I can't have my meds, how can I be forced into a situation where I can't have my ESA or that situation is one he can't survive? What his being my ESA means is that it's likely that a reasonable accomodation would have to be made so that I can still have him and that he can be reasonably taken care of. What that reasonable accomodation might consist of I don't know. But I'm not seeing how I could be thrown out onto the street in a situation that I couldn't have him since he'd be medically necessary and that he couldn't survive. I jut can't find anything in the Federal or PA law or any case law that comes anywhere near what my particular situation is. I haven't been able to even figure out what area of law this would fall under, so don't have any idea what sort of attorney to ask that would know.

I already knew that shelters are exempt from having to accept ESA's. That actually works in my favor not that it matters since my useless case worker never bothered to get me on the waiting list for one, and now it's WAY to late. Not that I could cope with that situation anyway. What I've already read about the shelter scares the shit out of me.

Other than that I'm out of ideas. This one is my only possible hope left to not be thrown out on the street without some kind of reasonable accomodation being made to keep that from happening. If I get to a point where I know there isn't a damn thing left that can be done I'll be back to thinking about how to get out of this horror the only other way there is. There's no way on earth I can lose my entire world and have to live somehow on the street. I never understood how anyone did it. That isn't life it's torture. I can't even THINK about having to do that without completely breaking down. I don't know how anyone wouldn't.

Ironically my scumlord and I want the same thing - she wants me out and I want to get out as long as I have somewhere to GO where I can still hold a job and not lose the most important things I have. Had she just been reasonable and made a reasonable accomodation with me so that I COULD get out with somewhere to go and still have a life she would have gotten her house back just as she wanted to rent to some other poor soul, and I'd finally be out of here and away from her and able to just continue having my life.

[ScreamingMeemie]

223. What I'm trying to say is that there are no legal protections for emotional support dogs

the way there are for service dogs.

[TorchTheWitch]

236. that I know

I learned more about service animals, therapy animals and ESA's then I could have dreamed of. And there are some very strange animals used for all three. I would like to have a therapy buffalo, and a service turtle.

[Tree-Hugger]

224. Not to be a dick, but....

It is perfectly legal and accepted to evict families with children without regard to where they get their next shelter. It is legal to evict people with medical issues.

My family has been in eviction court a couple of times. The landlord gave zero fucks about my children becoming homeless or my well-known medical issues (I, too, have a condition that causes fainting and a bad digestive condition among other things, plus PTSD). I was told, "it's nothing personal, just business." I have kids, one of whom has mild special needs, and pets. I could have been legally evicted.

I am just saying, don't hang your hat on an ESA. It is good to have Yoshi registered as such.......but I think the reason you cannot find federal or PA statutes that would deem an ESA as a way to febd off eviction is because none exists.

[TorchTheWitch]

247. I haven't been evicted

There was no judgment that I had to leave at all. The judgment was that I could remain on the property as long as I paid X amount of money to the landlord in just a few days that I couldn't possibly do and continue paying the rent unless I wanted to move... and of COURSE I want to get the hell out of here and have wanted to for years but didn't ever have the money to do it. It costs a LOT of money to rent another place and that can't be done without a job and without that money to pay at the time of signing a lease.

I've known for years I was never going to get my security deposit back, and thanks to that shitbag of a district judge he never let me refute her saying that I didn't pay her a security deposit or last month's rent and I had that document with me that I certainly did. The second I opened my mouth he shut me down immediately as he did whenever I tried to refute anything she said by interrupting me immediately and asking me stupid questions about something else. He never should have been having the hearing in the first place since I was never served a Notice to Quit which is mandatory by PA law before a landlord can file an eviction. I brought that up first thing, he questioned her about that and she admitted she didn't serve one. At that point by law he had to stop the hearing yet he continued with it anyway. I got utterly railroaded by that asshole.

The clerks in his court do nothing but generate paper and schedule hearings. He reads nor signs anything, and they just rubber stamp his signature on everything. They don't KNOW anything about what's on their own forms. And right on their own form that the landlord had to use to file the eviction it says right on it to check the box if you served a Notice to Quit and that it had run it's course according to PA law, and she didn't check that box, but the clerks had no idea what that meant and just went ahead and let her file the eviction that they scheduled the hearing for. ALL the district judge does is show up for hearings every Tuesday morning. ALL the rest of his time he spends working in his own law firm as a partner. He's THE judge of the district court, and there is no one higher than him... it's HIS court. The single fact alone that no Notice to Quit was ever served on me all by itself would appeal his ruling since that's PA law, and he wiped his ass with it.

A Notice to Quit is a tenant's legal rights. It notifies the tenant that they have 10 days (in PA) to either pay the rent in arrears or move out and that by the end of that 10 days if the tenant does neither ONLY THEN can the landlord file an eviction proceeding. My legal rights by that one thing all by itself would overturn his ruling on appeal. I just never cared about that. ALL I ever wanted to do was get the hell out TO somewhere.

That was the only reason a did the appeal - just to buy time so I wasn't thrown out the door with nothing and could have a small window of time to get a job and make as much money as I possibly could before I had to pay the court again, move out TO somewhere and default on the appeal. I HATE it that all that money I've had to pay the court goes into escrow that she gets as soon as I default on the appeal. I just wanted one month where I didn't have to pay anything to anyone and use every penny to get out and rent some bitty little place in a bad neighborhood if that's all I could afford to do in one month and be done with the situation and with her.

That one month was this month and thanks to her suing me, I had to spend almost all of it writing and filing the nearly two inch thick Answer/New Matter/Counterclaim myself, and once again file it with a pauper's petition that I had to wait to be granted. I even had to file an Entry of Appearance for my own self the court also charged a fee for though the fees were all waived by my pauper's petition being granted. Then it was back to the court to pick up the timestamped copy to be sent to the scumlord's attorney. That I finally got done the Friday before last. On top of all that I had to do battle with the welfare office getting approved for food stamps and medical insurance that was all I could get. Still, I made some time to work on getting a job and got an offer from the best catering company that does most of the rich Main Liner's events that pays very well but couldn't take because by then I couldn't put gas in the car to get to that one event nor buy the few pieces of the uniform I had to have. I came up with an excuse as to why I couldn't take just that one event which wasn't so far from the truth - I was sick as a dog. Thankfully, they still want me for other events, but they sure aren't going to if I'm on the street and they don't even have a way to contact me anymore.

I know I can't hang my hat on anything which is why I spend so much time turning myself inside out in the bathroom and trying every minute of every day to find some way out of this horror. I've never had the enormous luxury to hang my hat on a damn thing. Constant giant obstacles get put in my path, and just last week with the dingbats at the welfare office scaring the shit out of me threating to take away my food stamps and medical insurance after all the time and hoops I had to jump through just to do that wasting a day I needed to go to an audition to go to their office and spend hours in the waiting room only to find out that someone screwed up and there's nothing wrong with my benefits. Then the very next day similar hell with the water company that took all day to find out that no, their automated message threatening to shut off my water in two days if I didn't immediately pay the bill was also a screw up by someone that scared the shit out of me and once again cost me another day. Every day for two months I expect some fresh hell, and very often I get one - or more than one. I didn't expect the worst to come from my own case worker that did not one single thing she said she would do never told me she wasn't so that I could and wasted days of my time with meeting she only bothered to show up for for one of them when there was no reason anything we did or talked about couldn't have just been done on the phone. She was on vacation all the week before last and never bothered to tell me, nor did she tell me that she was also taking vacation time last Thursday and Friday.

I'm not trying to use an ESA as a way to not be evicted, I'm hoping that a reasonable accommodation has to be made because of him so we aren't thrown out on the street. Given with what the Federal law says about an ESA being just as medically necessary as any other prescription that is medically necessary I can't be put into a situation where I can't have my medical necessity or that would be detrimental to my medical necessity. Clearly, being thrown out on the street would either force me to be without my medical necessity or cause serious detriment to my medical necessity. Therefore, logically I'm not seeing how I could be forced into any position like being forced to live on the street as I would either have to choose between doing without my medical necessity for his well being or force my medical necessity into a position he couldn't survive. Thus, I'm not seeing how I can be forced into having to either lose him for his sake or have to put him in an environment that no question would be detrimental to him, so I'm not seeing how no reasonable accommodation in that particular situation wouldn't have to be made. Shelters being legally exempt from having to accommodate an ESA works in my favor... if I could go to a shelter still losing everything else I own but still have him with me than no reasonable accommodation would need to be made. But seeing as my useless case worker never bothered to get me on the waiting list for the shelter it's WAY too late for me to get in it even without having my ESA at all.

All of my dogs have always been medical necessities for me anyway and was the biggest reason I got my first one and part of why I chose the particular breed. Due to past traumas I'm way over-paranoid about my personal safety particularly in my home. Without my dog I'm panic stricken feeling extremely unsafe. Even WITH my dog I'm still over-paranoid about all windows and doors being secured. Once I got my first dog I also found out that he more than even my meds can break the panic cycle because of forcing me to have to focus my mind on him and his needs or wants. Even the nightly walks with all the dogs I have had are my biggest therapy.

This both me and my shrink have always known since I got my first dog in 1993, but neither one of us knew there was any laws about ESA's, so it never occurred to either one of us to legally make any of my dogs a legal and registered ESA. This was something one of my brothers brought up that he knew a lot more about than I've been able to find out myself and that I told my case worker the first time I met her was my biggest priority other than my getting a job. She told me that she would deal with looking into the ESA thing and find out what it all meant and how it was done, but she never did, and I never found out she never did until very recently along with finding out she never got me on the waiting list for the shelter or did a single damn THING she said she would do. When I first met her I thought she was the bees knees and she's dropped the ball on me with EVERYTHING. I got more actual help in one phone call with the case worker that was covering for her on Friday then I ever got from her for over a month. He found out right away while we were on the phone as I was explaining the ESA thing how to go about it, what exactly I needed from my shrink with just a letter and the website to register my dog online as soon as I got it. It took him only 5 minutes. Had my own case worker done that 5 minutes that she said she would and that I was not to worry about myself and to deal with other things Yoshi would have already been legal and registered for over a month. Instead, I have to deal with this myself in the 11th hour. Like I need more stress piled on. I could gouge out her eyes.

[Tree-Hugger]

229. Do you actually hear yourself?

I have been offering resources throughout this and other threads. She hasn't responded.

Yes, I have been in the same situation and have received support. So?

Thanks for the kickback to my blog and the AdSense hits.

Have YOU offered a solution or a place to stay?

[TeeYiYi]

237. Why dig your heels in?…

It seems that you should've used your court ordered reprieve, and financial donations from friends, to get your ducks in a row and move forward from a clearly negative situation.

At this point, it seems like you're trying to exercise squatter's rights. That can never be a good thing… for you or for anyone.

You don't own the house, your landlord does. You've already received legal remedy to extend your eviction deadline. What do you possibly hope to gain by refusing to move out of someone else's home?

You're creating your own stress and drama, and the law is not going to ultimately side with you against the legal owner of the property that you're attempting to commandeer.

I suggest that you put your shit into an inexpensive storage unit and move on to the next chapter in your life. That might mean living in your car until you figure it out but at least you'll be out from under the exponential accrual of $1200+ per month in rental debt.

You've been given every opportunity to move forward with your life, including the advice of friends, financial donations and food stamps. This standoff with the owner of your residence is not going to end well for you.

Take the energy you've been expending on shadow boxing and channel it in a different, more productive direction.

I wish you well.

TYY

[suffragette]

242. WRC and ESA

Last edited Mon Jun 1, 2015, 01:46 AM - Edit history (1)

It still might be helpful for you to contact the WRC, since they might be able to connect you to local resources that can help for your long term goals, including housing. Also, the support groups might help you with the understandable stress you are experiencing.

Am I understanding correctly that you hope having Yoshi documented as an ESA would keep you from being evicted from your current rental?

Some basic info (with the disclaimer that I am not a lawyer and aspects of this can change based on state and case law):

The key aspects of having an ESA are being a person with a disability and documenting a nexus between the impact of the disability and the support from your ESA.

The rights are for the person with the disability not to be discriminated against. There aren't additional rights granted to the animal, only to the person with the disability.

The information about this can be found in the Fair Housing Act, since this is what applies in seeking a reasonable accommodation in housing for an ESA. (FHA based this on the parts of Section 504 which apply to housing. This is different than the ADA rules on service animals or the FAA rules on assistive animals on flights).

This will be very helpful for you when you move, since you may be able to have an accommodation of having Yoshi with you in a rental with a no pets policy. You might also be able to have a pet deposit waived, since documented ESA's in housing are not regarded as pets. These are examples of reasonable accommodations. As you know, you will need a letter from your Psychiatrist to document this. There are sometimes state limits in terms of types of rentals.

Eviction could fall in this area if it was directly related to eviction because a person with a disability has an ESA in housing, has followed the process for requesting and documenting this and there have been no behavior issues or other aspects of creating undue burden.

I see the philosophical points you are making about this, but I think the legal issue is more narrow and that's why you can't find a precedent.


For more info, go to http://www.pittsburghfairhousing.org/fair_housing_laws.asp

[Lilith Rising]

246. Nice research - thank you.

[Tree-Hugger]

215. Excellent resource!!! nt

[onecaliberal]

179. I gave a bit. I do hope things change soon for you and Yoshi.

[jcboon]

239. The woman needs money--not scolding

Torch, go to the Episcopal Church, I think it's St. George's, and tell the priest that an Episcopalian told you to go there for help. Tell him/her you need some gas money. Most priests have a discretionary fund for this very purpose.
I'll put a little more in GoFund Me too.
Democrats are generous in theory but there are a lot of them who think like Republicans.

[840high]

243. I hope by now she has enough to

put gas in her car and buy some food.

[riderinthestorm]

244. That's shitty to ASSume none of us have helped her

Or that we're like Republicans.

Ive given 6x the first two months of this drama. Now we're on month 3. And yes, now I'm getting more skeptical.

It's the same old, same old story - none of the suggestions or help offered is sufficient or is rejected outright including free housing for her and Yoshi for the next year by DUer Corgigal.

[akbacchus_BC]

251. Can't you get any social assistance if your are in such

need. I helped out before but unfortunately, I can't this time. Was slapped with a levy for my condo in the tune of $7+.

Hope you are able to manage this time around!

[TorchTheWitch]

254. I've wasted far too much time on social assistance that doesn't exist

When you have no kids, aren't pregnant or have a drug or alcohol problem tough shit for you. My county has NEVER had much of anything in the way of social assistance, and every person is forced to deal with the county of where they reside. Had I happened to live in Philadelphia County there is a lot more in teh way of social assistance, but since I don't it's not available to me.

This is exactly the kind of crap I had to find out the hard way and never WANTED to do, but my family convinced me it was my only hope... that was before they told me they would do nothing else for me. I didn't want to waste one minute of m time with any social services and just get a damn job. The Community Action Agency USED to have a program that helped only employed persons with re-housing due to eviction with help for finding a place, help paying security deposit and first month's rent as well as moving expenses, but they ran out of money and are scrambling to just continue to help those peopel that were already in the program. There is no service that helps keep anyone off the street other than the shelter that is woefully inadeqite and why it is continually full with a long waiting list. Other people considered more "needy" than me get bumped ahead of me for the shelter... people with children, that are pregnant, have drug or alcohol problems, AIDS, brian injury or other debilitating mental condition, elderly, etc.

The shelter itself is terrible. They lock the doors every night at 8pm, so you can't have an evening or night job. They serve one meal a day that is open to the homeless and is whatever it is that's been donated. Too bad for me with my food allergies and food restrictions because of my medication. For other meals you're on your own. There is no kitchen or laundry facilities. You can only have a shower twice a week using a community bar of soap provided no one has stolen it. There is no way to secure any of your possessions, nor to even secure your own person when you sleep. There are no guards. Theft and other violence is rampant, and you are stuck in there with alcoholics, drug addicts, mental incompetants, and all other "dregs". It houses both sexes. I'm sure we've all been long familiar with the horrors of homeless shelters and why so many homeless prefer to live on the street because they feel safer. I'd rather be dead than lose everything and have to face existing in it even if I could get in since my case worker never put me on the waiting list as my family insisted. They imagine that it's Disneyland even after I gave them the link to the shelter's own website that spells out many of these things though of course it doesn't mention how vulnerable you and whatever you bring with you are. Like hell I'd go there. I'd rather be dead.

There is also a women's shelter, but it's only for women with kids, pregnant women and victims of domestic violence. Just being female can't get you in it. At 50 years old I should try to get myself knocked up just so I could get in there? The fertility ship sailed over a year or two ago. I'd never do it anyway. Pregnancy is nothing I've ever wanted, and dangerous with my medication. How in the world could anyone willfully bring a child into the world they can't care for and when they can't even care for themselves anymore? Women do it all the time though.

My neighbors have swam the gauntlet of social services from physical or mental complete inability to function as a normal person, domestic abuse, child services, welfare, NHS and Community Action which is all there is. There is no more Section 8 housing available in this county anymore either as some time ago they filled the quota whatever that is. That was something else my case worker was supposed to do is get me on the list for Section 8. She didn't.

We've all beefed here about how crappy social services are in this country. You have NO idea just how bad they are until you try to get what puny services there are. That all by itself is terrifying to discover. Worse than that, it's impossible to just get someone on the phone. When you finally do they tell you certain things but the next person you talk to tells you different, and on and on until you have no idea what information is correct or if any of it is. How do you trust any social service agency that does that? And they ALL do it inclduing legal aid that is one of the worst. If you don't ASK them something specific they won't tell you what things you can do that you don't know about. NO ONE at legal aid told me about the pauper petition, and I only found out about it by accident though I didn't know what all it did and had to find that out the hard way. Sooooo many things I've thought were a certain way that turned out not to be later. The pauper petition was the ONLY way I've been able to file ANYTHING with the court because the court fees are enormous and normally paid by law firms with plenty of money. Just to file the appeal I was expected to be able to pay a fee of $285.50. Had I not found out about it that legal aid didn't tell me about though I TOLD them I couldn't possibly afford the filing fees I never would have tried to file the appeal and would have been on the street back in March when it was still as cold as it was during the winter. I would have been thrown out of here in that weather. The court clerks aren't ALLOWED to tell you a lot of things because it's considered giving legal advise and they get fired for that. They do at least hint in such a way that you can figure out things yourself sometimes.

Everything I've had to do I had to do myself while finding things out the hard way. I had to spend more time researching things and burning my phone up making continual calls that I couldn't trust what I was being told, and just get scammed and run in circles. Every one of my neighbors that have had to deal with all these same and much more services have said the same, but they only ever told me these things long after the fact.

The ship sailed a while ago. I don't even know why I'm still fighting other than if I stop then what do I do? Just sit and wait till they come to throw me out and take everything I have and everything that means anything to me?

I would not even wish this on my scumlord. Though if she was standing on the sidewalk while a giant bus was headed her way, I'd give her a shove.

[ohheckyeah]

252. I haven't helped

financially since a stroke left me unable to work and I'm getting help from my family with medical bills. There was a time they might not have helped because frankly, much to my embarrassment, I was a pain to deal with.

I find it incredible that your family won't even hold on to your computer - why is that? Be honest. Is it possible you have been so wrapped up in your problems that you wear everyone around you out with them and never ask how they are?

Your attitude towards everybody seems to be they are scum, assholes, idiots, etc. The clerks lied, the judge was unfair, and on and on. I would suggest (from my own experience) that you take a hard look in the mirror and ask what you have contributed to all these relationships, even if nothing more than bad expectations.

I truly wish you the best but your attitude would drive me away.

PS when people ask what time it is they don't want to know how to make a watch.

Good luck.

[Jesus Malverde]

253. 11K Views

Curious who is linking to this.

Almost as many views as Skinners sticky post.

[Hekate]

262. The conservative sites are not our problem; they can go pound sand.....

OTOH, as people here are beginning to notice, there is some sort of help she needs that DUers cannot provide, and it goes way beyond money and advice. As one person (a former donor now ill himself) up thread pointed out, when absolutely every single person around you is at fault, it's time to look in the mirror.

I think it's to people's credit that they want to be kind, and even though I've been skeptical for months, they each individually have to decide what they want to do about it.

[Dorian Gray]

263. I agree with you

I just read this whole thread this morning, and I'm at a loss.

I don't give a shit what the conservative sites are doing. They're mocking is pointless.

But reading excuse after excuse and blaming everything and everyone but herself, I think TTW needs help that nobody here can give. It's how addicts think. Not saying she abuses, or even uses, substance. I have had experience with severe substance abuse in the past, and it's a similar line of blame. The result in our case was death of our loved one bc she never got her shit together.

I hope that's not the case with TTW. And I would love to see her get her life in order here.

[KittyWampus]

266. be careful. I had a post hidden for politely mentioning she might have a substance abuse

problem in her last thread. Note- having a substance abuse issue doesn't make you a bad person.

[Tree-Hugger]

276. I agree

Other websites can suck it. There will always be sites for counter opinions, to mock others, to play (and often fail) detective. That's the internet. It can be maddening and annoying, but sometimes you have to ignore it.

I agree she needs different support. I don't know if she's telling the truth. Having been accused of being a scammer myself, I am reluctant to point fingers at people. I try to help point out resources and such. I figure it can't hurt. I think the internet can be a valuable place to find support, especially when one is alone, but I agree she may need personal help offline that could make a positive difference.

[DemocratSinceBirth]

275. My two cents

On many political ideological surveys there is a question:


"Should those who refuse to work be denied government assistance?"


I have thought long and hard about that question and my answer is reluctantly no.

First of all we can never truly know what goes on in other people's heads and what demons reside there and second I would rather see ten grifters get help than one truly needy person be denied assistance.


There is always the problem of the culture of dependency. That's not good for anybody...But that's a discussion for another day...

If folks don't like TTW's story just leave her alone.

[KittyWampus]

279. Some of us have family and friends who are mentally ill and/or abusing drugs-

it's not being nasty or insulting to comment that there may be underlying issues.

And my posts in all 3 TTW threads have stemmed from the compassion born of having to deal with close relatives who have serious problems that a couple of bucks won't fix.

If this post in anyway resonates with any other DU'ers, then it's worth it to post. Even if it gets hidden too.

I have made no bones on DU about the fact I have two mentally ill brothers.

Board nannies… blech.