General Discussion
Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsIs there anyone in the Philidelphia area that can help a DUer find housing for her and large dog?
I started another thread with this idea but it turned into mostly a sad collection of insults and judgement.
It appears TTW and yoshi have some $$,(and many Duers would be willing to help pay more to help with 1st,last and deposit)
but it is extremely difficult to find housing for her and her dog.
I was thinking, with so many thousands?? of DUers...someone might know someone who needs a renter, has a mother in law apt to rent??
Sometimes all it takes is connections, or a lucky break....to get someone back on track.
Could DUers with compassion and suggestions please offer help?
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shenmue
(38,598 posts)I used to volunteer there. They may know something about local emergency housing.
I was also with the Red Cross, and the case workers had lists of rental housing for people who were burned out of or otherwise lost their homes through disasters (which happened multiple times every week). The Red Cross would often negotiate the deposit and sometimes pay it, though I don't think they do that for evictions. And my chapter had the attitude of "We save humans." I was part of the cadre of "Those PET People" who looked for places that would take animals, because a lot of people would rather sleep in the park than be parted from their pets, but we were very unofficial. The Humane Society works with the Red Cross; you'll sometimes see them at shelters to provide animal housing, because RC can't have animals in disaster shelters. I haven't heard of them providing lists of pet-friendly housing, though.
Mnemosyne
(21,363 posts)KamaAina
(78,249 posts)(assuming, of course, you mean Philadelphia, Pa., not Philadelphia, Miss.
)msanthrope
(37,549 posts)semi-abandonded, bill unpaid. What, exactly do you want DUers to do?
Get more involved?
Quackers
(2,256 posts)Sorry to hear this!
JI7
(93,615 posts)
PearliePoo2
(7,768 posts)How did Yoshi get back to doggie day care? (if you don't mind giving details) thanks.
AtheistCrusader
(33,982 posts)Because, I don't know about you, but I would TOTALLY take my dog back to a place that kept it in a tiny crate with no water and dehydrated, and losing hair, and yadda yadda yadda.. Right?
Someone was not exactly forthcoming with accurate details, methinks.
daredtowork
(3,732 posts)I thought that was just her shocked reaction when she found Yoshi in the shelter where she didn't want him to be.
Yoshi is seriously at the same Doggie Daycare she pleaded to take him out of? With the bill escalating? I hope the thread-starter realizes that will fritter away all her housing money.
In fact now that she's lost everything, she may even use Yoshi to keep herself in a permanent state of crisis (re: frittering away her housing money until she does become homeless). She really does need case management help there.
Yo_Mama
(8,303 posts)I am worried for TTW, and sad for all concerned.
She's not paying the bill at the daycare, so I don't think it will be a cash flow issue for her.
daredtowork
(3,732 posts)I just keep throwing it out there as what she would most benefit from in case anyone sits down with her and tries to get her hooked back into the system somehow. That would be the pivot point for a lot of things for her - perhaps even care for her dog.
pnwmom
(110,260 posts)People HAVE been trying to get her hooked into the system. That's not the problem . . . .
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10026473464
98. I just got hit with another blow that is the ruin of me. I found out today that the slumlord hired and attorney and filed a Complaint against me that of course is going to be full of outrageous lies and damand a ridiculous judgment award. I'd have to file an Answer, and I need an attorney to do that, and even if I could possibly afford one which is just laughable if it wasn't so horrible by May 10th. If I don't file an Answer it's like I agree with whatever outrageous crap is in the Complaint, I lose, and she'll get some kind of award just because I'm too poor and days away from losing my beloved Yoshi that is my only emotional support and every damn thing I own that I worked a lifetime to acquire including all those mementos from my life going back to my childhood.
I can't find a way out of this horrible mess. I've struggled so hard and went without sleep to find whatever I needed to find and did everything I could and worked with these worthless agencies that do nothing but waste your time and jerk you around, who tell you one thing or the complete opposite depending on who you talk to after finally getting someone on the phone after being put through automated phone hell that goes nowhere, give you false names so you can never find them again, and on and on and on. One of those agencies told me they could help me with utility bills, not to pay them and bring them to their intake process so they could deal with them for me, but when I did that it turned out to be some mental health clinic they expected me to pay for and had no clue what I was talking about concerning my bills or housing problem or anything. I ended up having to pay them myself almost getting thrown off the water company's poor person's plan because I didn't pay it on time, and I didn't because that agency asshole LIED to me just to get me into a mental health intake full of VERY seriously nutso people. And she won't return a single one of my many messages ever since. Then yesterday I find out that she told my one brother who has at least been trying to help me find some kind of government help that he wasn't ALLOWED to talk to me anymore at ALL utterly destroying the only contact I'd managed to build with anyone in my family that gave a smidgen of a damn.
daredtowork
(3,732 posts)had been urging TTW to call 211 and try to research various resources and been sending resources for the Philadelphia area found on the web (not the greatest resource). And TTW tried to pursue them. This is a huge hassle. From my own experience, I can tell you TTW isn't kidding about the phone trees, the holds, the wrong information, the intake processes that can be set a month down the line (and not even be what you needed). It is inefficient and frustrating. That's why I am hoping for someone to help lift the burden a bit from TTW and help find the right resources for her.
Note in regard to the mental health clinic that she had to pay for services once she got there. Wrong place to go and/or miscommunication.
pnwmom
(110,260 posts)and that her brother was somehow involved.
I'm thinking maybe she needed mental health facilities.
daredtowork
(3,732 posts)I didn't mean to sound like I was arguing otherwise.
A good case manager would include mental health services while organizing an entire repertoire of services from different agencies and sources TTW needs at this point.
If TTW needs psychiatric medication, she could get that through Medi-cal: there could be psychiatrists on staff right at a good medical clinic if TTW were enrolled there. She probably has other health concerns as well given the state of her sleep. Psychiatrist and psychologist for therapy are separate. A clinical diagnosis from a psychiatrist would be better - usually necessary - for SSI/SSDI purposes.
Anyway, when I say "case manager" or "wrap-around services", psychiatry is subsumed under that.
ladyVet
(1,587 posts)You keep saying there's more DUers need to do, or should do, but the sad, heartbreaking fact is, there isn't. People have tried and tried and tried to help TTW, a process that's been going on for months now. This is not a recent thing. It's been going on since February at least.
At this point, folks continue to contribute to her GoFundMe, and I think that just about covers all that's open to us.
Yes, she can likely get services through this, that and the other agency. But from what I've read, she doesn't want to. And until she wants to, it's not going to happen. Well, unless there's an involuntary commitment somewhere down the line.
I'm as sorry about the situation as I can be. I hate to see this happening. But I'm at a loss as to what I can do, other than giving her money, which I don't have.
daredtowork
(3,732 posts)On my own account, I don't think DUers NEED to do anything concerning TTW.
If DUers *want* to do something, I offer my own informal recommendations, based on my own knowledge of having been in a similar situation, not on any particular training or expertise.
I participate in the conversation not just because I think the advice/knowledge about wrap-around case management would be good for TTW, but in a meta way, I think its good for DU to raise it's awareness of the collapse of welfare infrastructure services and the few places people on the edge have to turn. By examining options for TTW, we examine options for other people on DU who may get into her situation as well. This is a situation very few people have true insight into, but a lot of people have big judgments about. This is a chance to dispel some of those judgments.
I apologize if you think I was urging you in particular to do something. That's not my intent at all.
Hekate
(100,133 posts)daredtowork
(3,732 posts)and legally they can't be forced upon her.
perhaps when she's ready to talk to friends, her friends can be fore-armed with some resources for her. That's all I can think of. Just to clarify - due to the misunderstanding with LadyVet - I'm not urging anyone to do anything concerning TTW. Rather, for people who continue to show concern for TTW, I'm throwing in what I think can be done for her.
Curmudgeoness
(18,219 posts)she may not be able to get Yoshi back until it is paid. And that will lead to another emergency.
msanthrope
(37,549 posts)
OneGrassRoot
(23,953 posts)I've only been checking in at DU more regularly over the last week, and I've read through the long threads to get a feel for what's going on re: TTW. You and your ex have really earned a lot of good karma points. I'm sorry you're now having to face this sort of stressor. Truly sorry. 
daredtowork
(3,732 posts)I'm so sorry that happened to you.
You are correct about people needing to help TTW (or at least get involved with her dog) from a distance. I hope people are understanding how defensive she is at this point.
You are amazingly generous for trying in the first place.
whathehell
(30,468 posts)scenario.
You have my sympathies. 
underahedgerow
(1,232 posts)officials will force her into a psych hold for evaluation and possibly state assisted mental health care.
It might not be a bad thing. Any legal/criminal efforts she makes won't get anywhere, so don't worry about that. What you've 'done' is naught but a civil issue, possibly. No crime was perpetrated and you broke no laws, so please don't worry about that. But you know, let her carry on.... hopefully the more she's exposed to law enforcement, maybe the closer she'll get to receiving the professional care that she needs.
We can only hope. You've absolutely done all you possibly can, over and far, far above the call of duty.
Freddie
(10,104 posts)The person has to threaten murder or suicide.
yardwork
(69,364 posts)I don't know PA law, but I do know that this kind of behavior can result in an arrest in NC. It has to be extreme and repeated, though. An arrest can result in a person being referred for mental health assessment. It is a round-about way for a person to get much-needed psychiatric care, but it is one avenue.
I've been following these threads on DU for a long time and I'm sad for TTW and her dog. I hope that they both get the care that they need.
Freddie
(10,104 posts)However if the alleged "crime" took place in Philly, they're a lot more worried about murders there; nothing will happen.
I only wish the best for TTW and Yoshi and that they can get the help they need.
Yo_Mama
(8,303 posts)I'm sorry to have guessed correctly.
I know you two don't need the hassles, but you still tried to do the right thing.
Habibi
(3,605 posts)I am so sorry to hear this. I don't suppose the doggie daycare can legally relinquish Yoshi to the Akita rescue, if he is semi-abandoned and the bill is unpaid? (That's just a general question; I don't expect you to know or answer, msanthrope - you and your ex are angels and don't need more to deal with.)
Starry Messenger
(32,381 posts)I haven't commented on this situation at all, but I've read threads about it--that poor dog. His human had ample opportunity to work with you to get him to a safe and stable place. I'm sorry you are being retaliated against for it.
cwydro
(51,308 posts)What is the name of this place anyway?
msanthrope
(37,549 posts)my understanding is that they only charged her $200 for the prior 3 to 4 weeks of boarding. as of my latest information that bill is currently unpaid. Yes they took Yoshi back because there was really nowhere else for him to go.
MoonRiver
(36,975 posts)TTW is an unfit human companion, imo.
catrose
(5,365 posts)but I thought they didn't have the facilities for Yoshi--crate too small, where he had to stay most of the time because he couldn't interact with the other dogs. Hot exercise yard--dog dehydrated--his hair falling out--
I feel so badly for Yoshi, you, your ex, and TTW.
REP
(21,691 posts)The same one who is trying to have Msanthrope arrested.
catrose
(5,365 posts)otherwise I'd totally agree
Boudica the Lyoness
(2,899 posts)as a "slumlord".
It makes me wonder what kind of hell that land lady went through with her former tenant.
REP
(21,691 posts)I started seeing behind the narrative very early on.
msanthrope
(37,549 posts)Apparently get much more exercise in the evening when they can be uncrated.
catrose
(5,365 posts)And I know the summer has been much hotter than the Northern states usually have to deal with; the climate control is often inadequate for all beings, and not everybody knows how to cope with the heat, sort of like Deep Southerners on icy roads. You bought him more days of life and somewhat improved conditions.
REP
(21,691 posts)As I understand it from reading all accounts, his treatment was not neglectful or cruel, but he was kept kenneled in part due to his temperament and out of concern for the safety of the other animals housed there. That this arrangement is far from ideal but the daycare is run by caring people who are trying to help, not mean-spirited people who wish to harm animals.
ETA also, if this place was really deliberately trying to kill or torture Yoshi, why was he returned there?
msanthrope
(37,549 posts)Deserved t o be slammed for their treatment of Yoshi. Without a doubt Yoshi was ill..... but I think that was to be expected given the conditions the doggie daycare was forced to keep him under. this was not a case of school P more of having limitations as to what one can provide for such a large dog over such a long time.
REP
(21,691 posts)And caring for such a large dog - especially one with aggressive tendencies or other special needs - outside the home is nearly impossible. My brother had a Saint with severe epilepsy; during her life, my brother and sister-in-law didn't leave their house together for more than a few hours.
As I said, I think the daycare is doing their best for him under very difficult circumstances that they're not set up for; not deliberately trying to hurt an animal in their care. It's very unfortunate for all concerned. I don't think they deserve to be slammed, either.
Demit
(11,238 posts)I suppose that's what TTW is doing with some of the $$ the OP says she has now, using it to pay for Yoshi's board. But how can they board the dog if it's a 'day-care'? Who is there at night?
The facility is a good 30 miles outside of Philadelphia. I forget if it was mentioned where TTW's rooming house is, and she was saying her car was a 'bucket of bolts', so using it to go back and forth to where the dog is precarious. So is paying for the gas. I remember her saying at one point she had to be careful of what she used her gas money on. Presumably now it is to get to her freelance gigs, if she is still doing that.
It sounds like she's just delaying the inevitable. The money she got here will run out. On some level she must know there isn't a realistic chance of finding a situation where she can keep the dog. She's playing out the string until the decision is taken out of her hands. Then, in her mind, it won't have been her fault.
REP
(21,691 posts)Another reason I very much doubt they have intentionally mistreated this or any dog.
Demit
(11,238 posts)I suppose they could be powerfully good-hearted, and can afford to eat the cost of his care besides. Or they know they have a backup plan if TTW stiffs them on payment--maybe they would then have a legal right to surrender him to the rescue org, the resolution that they know the dog needs most at this point?
REP
(21,691 posts)I think it's post #25 that gives the info that they haven't been paid. They're probably just very nice people trying to help someone in crisis; I just hope it doesn't come back to bite them the way Msanthrope's and her ex's extraordinary kindness did them.
greatauntoftriplets
(179,005 posts)msanthrope
(37,549 posts)To be caught up in this.....
greatauntoftriplets
(179,005 posts)You tried, but apparently no good deed does go unpunished.
msanthrope
(37,549 posts)Is convinced that x I and my dog walker had a scheme to steal yoshi and then we were going to make money on democratic Underground soliciting donations for him. Of course we asked for not a single donation and I actually ended up paying my dog walker for 2 weeks of promised work.
TTW.... according to law enforcement is currently trying to have ex and I investigated..... I am sure she will bring to the board all the dirt she finds.
greatauntoftriplets
(179,005 posts)I have every confidence that it will be determined that your intentions were nothing but altruistic. Terrible that you, the ex and the dog walker have to be subjected to this treatment.
Agschmid
(28,749 posts)alcibiades_mystery
(36,437 posts)
Sorry this is happening, but you seem to have a clear head about it. Keep on keeping on.
bettyellen
(47,209 posts)or trying to cut in on her profits from this now? This is really sad.
cwydro
(51,308 posts)I hope anyone who wants to help TTW is taking note of all this.
And thank you for the name and info of the doggie day care place.
The fact that TTW suspects you wanted to "use" DU for donations makes me even more suspicious of her motives here.
msanthrope
(37,549 posts)what type of help and what form it should take is up to each and every single individual DU member. if nothing else the experiences that I've shared over the last week I think give this board a more in-depth look At the situation.
BainsBane
(57,757 posts)and am sorry you have to deal with these problems after trying to help someone.
msanthrope
(37,549 posts)TuxedoKat
(3,843 posts)and your ex. When helpful efforts backfire on me my husband tells me, "no good deed goes unpunished."
Seriously though, bless you for your efforts.
Hekate
(100,133 posts)Projection and paranoia are not a pretty package.
Take care of yourselves, M. 
CreekDog
(46,192 posts)Why would anybody else with good intentions risk getting involved.
CreekDog
(46,192 posts)it's noteworthy only in that this is the first time I've posted that I won't be giving money to somebody.
she wants to treat someone who financially and physically helped her out?
then she shouldn't expect others to be willing to be victims in order to help her as you did.
msanthrope
(37,549 posts)Is contact with the doggie daycare I'll link which is provided in another post on here its Karen K 9 in Philadelphia.....
I've taken a very neutral position on monetary donations to TTW because I'm too close to the situation....., When she TW and I we're still speaking civilly I did suggest to her that she try to come up with manageable financial goals that she could present to the membership here. I also suggested to her that some members may wish to contribute directly to Yoshi so it might be a good idea to have targeted donations for his food and his daycare.
I think each member has to decide what they can do. The only advice I would give is that too perhaps if one is going to give Help one gives help at a distance.
Demit
(11,238 posts)I guess Phila is the closest big city, but Frazer is still a good hike from here.
Matariki
(18,775 posts)jberryhill
(62,444 posts)...the one who calls up and tells you that he hired a lawyer, and that lawyer screwed him over and was no good. So he hired another lawyer, and that lawyer screwed him over and was no good. And the third lawyer... well, THAT lawyer was so bad he hired another lawyer to sue that lawyer, and then the fourth lawyer screwed him over.
That client?
Don't engage that client.
msanthrope
(37,549 posts)Syzygy321
(583 posts)In medicine it's:
My first doctor misdiagnosed me and I nearly died,
and my second doctor was so arrogant I wouldn't send my dog to him,
and my third doctor was wonderful, or so I thought - until she suddenly turned on me, just because the second doctor told her a pack of lies.
But you - you're different! You're the only one who has ever listened to me!
LiberalElite
(14,691 posts)
EvolveOrConvolve
(6,452 posts)I'll be the first in line to donate to your bail or a retainer fee for the lawyer you'll need. I think it sucks that you were used this way and your kindness was returned with malice.
beam me up scottie
(57,349 posts)you and your ex are pretty damned awesome for trying to help Yoshi and TTW.
I am sorry for you both and also for Yoshi who is paying the price for having a selfish owner who cares more about her rights than the dog she claims to love.
I hope he goes to a rescue and gets adopted by people who will put his needs first.
I would give up my animals to caring people in a heartbeat before I would watch them suffer.
msanthrope
(37,549 posts)shot with Akita rescue.....and I truly fear for him.
beam me up scottie
(57,349 posts)Only breed specific rescues know how to properly assess and place them.
I don't want to think about what's ahead for Yoshi, he must be so terrified and confused.
bettyellen
(47,209 posts)JI7
(93,615 posts)on it but instead attacks other members including those who have actually helped .
pnwmom
(110,260 posts)Last edited Tue Aug 11, 2015, 06:14 AM - Edit history (2)
without training and careful supervision.
Here is some information she posted in April about problems with her landlord and Yoshi. The DUer who recently tried to help her would agree that she has good reason to worry about her stressed-out dog’s behavior.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10026473464
75. Update: that damn landlord is trying to come in again. . . . The first police officer I talked to about this told me that if she's crazy enough to just barge in knowing Yoshi will be loose in the house and he attacks her, that's her problem. But I don't want him to attack anyone and I'm not sure he even would though he knows that I hate her guts and her being anywhere near me now makes my anxiety go through the roof which a dog registers as fear of her. And she IS that crazy to just use her own key and come in the house whether I'm here or not. But Yoshi might also do nothing and just let her in and do whatever she wants. . . .I'm really worried for Yoshi... she could hurt him or poison him or something. And she IS that nuts!
98. I just got hit with another blow that is the ruin of me. I found out today that the slumlord hired and attorney and filed a Complaint against me that of course is going to be full of outrageous lies and damand a ridiculous judgment award. I'd have to file an Answer, and I need an attorney to do that, and even if I could possibly afford one which is just laughable if it wasn't so horrible by May 10th. If I don't file an Answer it's like I agree with whatever outrageous crap is in the Complaint, I lose, and she'll get some kind of award just because I'm too poor and days away from losing my beloved Yoshi that is my only emotional support and every damn thing I own that I worked a lifetime to acquire including all those mementos from my life going back to my childhood.
I can't find a way out of this horrible mess. I've struggled so hard and went without sleep to find whatever I needed to find and did everything I could and worked with these worthless agencies that do nothing but waste your time and jerk you around, who tell you one thing or the complete opposite depending on who you talk to after finally getting someone on the phone after being put through automated phone hell that goes nowhere, give you false names so you can never find them again, and on and on and on. One of those agencies told me they could help me with utility bills, not to pay them and bring them to their intake process so they could deal with them for me, but when I did that it turned out to be some mental health clinic they expected me to pay for and had no clue what I was talking about concerning my bills or housing problem or anything. I ended up having to pay them myself almost getting thrown off the water company's poor person's plan because I didn't pay it on time, and I didn't because that agency asshole LIED to me just to get me into a mental health intake full of VERY seriously nutso people. And she won't return a single one of my many messages ever since. Then yesterday I find out that she told my one brother who has at least been trying to help me find some kind of government help that he wasn't ALLOWED to talk to me anymore at ALL utterly destroying the only contact I'd managed to build with anyone in my family that gave a smidgen of a damn.
avebury
(11,196 posts)housing for herself and her dog? I love dogs and cats and the ones taht I have are my babies but, if I were a landlord, I would not rent to this woman. I think that there are far too many liability issues, particularly if there is a good chance that the dog will feed off of her issues. TTW has absolutely nothing to recommend her as a tenant.
Several years ago I had a stepson who had emotional and maturity issues and was totally incapable of taking care of himself, even as an adult. His Dad had a job that required him to be gone a lot of the time leaving me to watch his son - like a hawk. I cannot tell you how many times I tried to talk to his Dad about what was going on with his son and he refused to see the reality of the situation. The son needed to be in some type of residential program where he could receive ongoing therapy, monitoring, and assisted in trying to reach the point where he could be self sufficient. I found him to be a total nightmare to deal with. You would not believe the stories I could tell you of the messes he got himself into. I finally had it with the whole situation and walked and it was the best decision that I ever made.
Having dealt, for an extended period of time, with someone with mental health issues, you can throw TTW all the lifelines that you want but that is not going to accomplish anything in the long run and may end up creating liability issues for those who help her if legal issues arise should Yoshi act out. Been there, done that, won't ever do it again.
Lee-Lee
(6,324 posts)If someone local does help, do not in any way, shape or form allow yourself to be named on any lease or rental contact or be a co-signer or in any other way have your name hooked into this in any way.
The pattern developed is clear- if you do you will end up with financial burden and mess left to you to clean up and she will have every story and reason why everyone but her is to blame.
alcibiades_mystery
(36,437 posts)But there's a first time for everything.
People: Run, don't walk.
mnhtnbb
(33,348 posts)to discuss Yoshi's situation and whether a complaint might be lodged that could
result in removing Yoshi from TTW, here is their website and contact info.
I feel very badly for both TTW and Yoshi. But at this point, it would seem no one is going
to be able to do much for TTW, but maybe something can be done for Yoshi. I'm not
going to get involved, but if someone else is willing...
http://www.pspca.org/humane-law-enforcement-and-litigation/cruelty-prevention/
cwydro
(51,308 posts)we don't know the name of the doggie day care or TTW's name or any of that.
mnhtnbb
(33,348 posts)The reason I suggest going through the SPCA is that, I suspect--although I don't know for a fact--
that they will hold confidential the info on who makes the complaint to prevent retaliation.
MissB
(16,344 posts)No matter how many threads you start, folks will still point out TTW's apparent instability and Yoshi's apparent aggressiveness.
It's truly a sad situation but as so others have pointed out there is a liability associated with providing her additional help.
SheilaT
(23,156 posts)that some people cannot be rescued, not matter how hard others try. Kindheartedness and a willingness to help others are genuinely wonderful traits.
Do you know what TTW's current job situation is? Because simply giving her the cash for 1st and last month plus deposit plus whatever the landlord wants for the dog, isn't going to help much if she's not earning enough to continue paying on her own. If, indeed, a landlord would be willing to rent to her on that basis. And as someone else has already pointed out, no one should get involved in actually signing a lease or any other paperwork on her behalf.
From the beginning TTW resisted all good advice and various other efforts to help her, and has turned on the one who actually went out of her way to house the dog. I sincerely hope that her threats to sue that person can't begin to turn into reality. Meanwhile, some other useful advice has been posted, although TTW doesn't seem to have internet access herself. I hope J J is in actual contact and can pass along what is helpful.
As has already been pointed out in this thread, TTW has a large animal of a difficult breed, and there may have been problems with it attacking or at least menacing people in the past.
Anyone who wants to contribute to her can do it through her GoFundMe page. The link shows up in many earlier threads.
There comes a time when people have to admit that they have done all they can do. And some here have gone above and beyond.
I think the dog is going to have to go if she decides to get any kind of help. She has to take care of herself first before she can take care of anyone or anything else. If that sounds harsh, I'm sorry.
cwydro
(51,308 posts)I sure hope folks read some of the previous threads before they donate even a dollar to this.
pnwmom
(110,260 posts)She never indicated what her qualifications were or how she planned on making the switch.
SheilaT
(23,156 posts)I'm thinking it was a bartending job she lost because she couldn't figure out how to heat up water to wash when she was without hot water. Then she was saying how not a single bar where she was would hire anyone over 25 or so, which is why she wasn't working.
I've never worked as a bartender myself, but I go to enough bars to know that not everyone working there is real young. If you know what you're doing behind the bar, I find it hard to believe you can't get hired. Unless, of course, she was presenting so badly that no one wanted to hire her, a distinct possibility.
But your point about what qualifications she had is spot on. We only have her word to go on about most things.
Arugula Latte
(50,566 posts)He's a dangerous dog and unlikely to get a good quality of life.
KittyWampus
(55,894 posts)before you donate money.
People who are unstable due to biochemical or substance abuse issues will continue to screw over themselves, their loved ones and strangers up until they finally reach a place so bad they realize they need help and are can willingly accept it.
Until someone reaches rock bottom, they will make every excuse to continue their self-destructive behavior.
Every circumstance will be someone else's fault. Those trying to offer assistance who don't just play along and ignore the mental illness or substance abuse are pushed aside and blamed.
This is my personal experience. For some reason, in this life time, I've had to witness quite a few people self destruct and it is very difficult.
Tipperary
(6,930 posts)Agschmid
(28,749 posts)AtheistCrusader
(33,982 posts)We KNOW everything about the daycare for the dog was untrue. She wouldn't take him back there if they *actually* tried to kill Yoshi.
Her entire story relies on the same breathless 'trust me' credibility as her claims about the mean 'ol people at the daycare.
Yoshi could be safe and sound, and TTW could, right now, be free to seek housing ANYWHERE, or even intake into a mental health care system, without a worry in the world. Zero dependents.
But no, she has a huge, potentially dangerous dog that requires special care/housing, and it limits her options.
The dog is, I'm sure, wonderful, but in this case Yoshi is a boat anchor TTW insists on carrying around all the time no matter what. I suspect, whether she realizes it or not, she remains attached to Yoshi BECAUSE it guarantees she cannot get into the sort of help she requires, and rejects.
TexasMommaWithAHat
(3,212 posts)But I know my cousin would not allow Yoshi around her kids, and frankly, I would not ask her to take Yoshi in.
I don't think anyone wants to be responsible for a potentially dangerous situation.
Lee-Lee
(6,324 posts)She ends up on the street.
With no walls around Yoshi he is exposed to the public much more.
Yoshi bites somebody.
Cops are called.
Aggressive dog, unstable/irrational owner, it all goes downhill from there. Best case outcome of that scenario is they take Yoshi to the city pound and he is put down because of his aggressive temperament.
And she is the only one who has the ability to change that course. And everyone else needs to accept that until she sees that nobody else can help.
avebury
(11,196 posts)A police officer shoots Yoshi if he is deemed dangerous. Now a days, that has the greatest possibility of happening.
cwydro
(51,308 posts)Besides, Yoshi is stuck in a crate at the doggie day care wondering what he did wrong.
I guess TTW is busy with the grand she got from good hearted DUers. Msanthrope said she is not working, so she has a thousand to coast on for a bit.
I'm an animal lover, and this is all kinds of wrong.
CreekDog
(46,192 posts)and additionally, this dog himself is hurt as a result and/or euthanized as a result.
underahedgerow
(1,232 posts)In the very least, paranoid schizophrenic, or some other serious personality disorder. She's delusional, clearly, and everyone is 'out to get her'.
There is nothing anyone can do until she snaps, and then the authorities can hopefully step in.
Syzygy321
(583 posts)but as a PSA, can i vote for run-of-the-mill borderline personality disorder?
The landlady was the worst of villains, and her social worker was a rescuing hero... Until a month later when the social worker was a useless jerk, and Msanthrope was her new hero. Until the page turned,
and Msanthrope became the villain...
If you do reach out and you get the "You are the only person who has ever been nice to me!" speech - and you catch yourself feeling all warm and protective and heroic,
that's the warning sign you're being played by a veteran of the game.
Just a heads-up.
gwheezie
(3,580 posts)By the number of threads and length. Also the feeling of being sucked into a black hole.
underahedgerow
(1,232 posts)that turned out to be a mental health facility, and the case worker immediately became a very horrid person.
I don't blame TTW at all for her circumstances, any more than I blame someone for having cancer. Being mentally ill is the same as having any other disease, except what she has effects her mind. Some assholes on this board are accusing her of being a "tweaker', well they're just ignorant assholes.
Mental illness like this is really difficult to treat. The paranoia aspect of the disease makes it impossible for anyone to get through to her, to get her the proper care that she needs. It's all very sad.
Demit
(11,238 posts)And more than that, she's now actively trying to hurt them. It's such a spurious charge that I doubt the police will give her story very much credence--especially Philadelphia police--but what a lesson! No good deed goes unpunished.
Unless there is a rich angel on DU, who would be willing to subsidize TTW (and her dream to be with her dog just like before) for an open-ended period of time, regardless of her tendency to turn on people...well, I believe compassion here is still alive, but it's mixed with recognition that this has become an impossible situation.
meaculpa2011
(918 posts)and was bitten by his friend's Akita.
The dog clamped onto his inner thigh and would not let go. By the time I ran from the kitchen to the backyard he was bleeding profusely. The owner yelled out a command and the dog let go. We were frantic. They could not find the vaccination records and the ER doctor sent the police to seize the dog. In those years the dog would have been euthanized immediately and the brain examined.
They were finally able to locate the vet so my son didn't have to go through the pretty rough treatment regimen.
No more play dates at that house.
There are so many dog breeds. I don't get it.
jen63
(813 posts)At the neighbor's where he'd been a million times. Tore him up. The back of his head, neck and shoulder. I asked him how he kept the dog from his face an front of his neck. He said, "I scrunched up in a ball and put my arms over my head, like we were having a tornado drill at school." It probably saved his life.
I love big bully dogs, but they demand the correct ownership and handling.
Lordquinton
(7,886 posts)Animals can't talk, so we have to watch for other signs that they don't want to be interacted with. Kids are the worst when it comes to this, they are taught that dogs are fluffy playthings, and when the inevitable happens it's always the dog's fault, and execution is the punishment.
I have a very low opinion, lower than pimps and military recruiters, of people who insist on the death sentence when their little brat pushes a dog too far (weather that brat is 3 or 33).
jen63
(813 posts)around dogs and wasn't a "brat" and didn't think they were just "fluffy playthings." you're quite off the mark. We had a Jack Russell and a Mastiff/Boxer mix at the house. He knew what he was doing. I never DID state what happened to the dog though, did I? I think I'll just STFU now so I don't get a hide.
Lordquinton
(7,886 posts)but in far too many cases it is true. When walking my Dutch Shepherd there are far too many kids that reach out without a second thought. Even after the "Does he bite" "yes" *sticks hand out anyway*
Glad you taught your kids about dogs, that doesn't change the fact that the education in that area is greatly lacking these days.
Response to Lordquinton (Reply #79)
Name removed Message auto-removed
lumberjack_jeff
(33,224 posts)Buy a gun, at least the gun requires you to aim and pull the trigger.
Mariana
(15,624 posts)whenever someone - even a child - is attacked by a vicious dog.
My aunt and uncle had a Boston terrier that jumped up and bit me in the face for no reason. By the time I got back from the doctor's office, that dog was gone. My aunt and uncle weren't about to let it have a chance to bite a child ever again.
Person 2713
(3,263 posts)listen to what the owner tells you!
My daughter saw an adult do that without asking and asked why they were not following the rule.sigh
Cats are another issue. We have asked visitors to please leave the cat alone and tell them it bites.
They go to grab the cat. Sigh
Codeine
(25,586 posts)Or keep it away from the innocent public. Aggressive, poorly-socialized dogs do not belong in public.
It's not your dog's fault, it's not the kid's fault, it's the owner's fault.
dsc
(53,396 posts)sometime people do things which cause a dog to bite. It does happen. Honestly, people often have no clue how to approach dogs. I have always had good dogs in terms of temperment but I have seen people interact with my dogs in ways that are just bad ideas. Kids should be taught at an early age the correct way to approach animals.
cwydro
(51,308 posts)One of the vicious neighborhood kids where I lived at the time decided to crack her in the head with a baseball bat.
She lived, thank god, but she was terrified of children after that. I kept her away from kids because I'm quite sure she would have bitten one that got too close to her. Dogs who have been mistreated may react poorly to people they do not know, but that is no reason to get rid of them.
It's purely stupid for people to allow their children to approach animals without asking. I'm an adult, and I always ask if I may pet a dog before doing so.
lumberjack_jeff
(33,224 posts)If the dog bites the kid, the dog goes away with predjudice.
I have a similarly low opinion of people who knowingly keep dangerous dogs.
roody
(10,849 posts)They have my full moral support, but it takes special skills and responsibilities to house and retrain a dog aggressive dog.
Hekate
(100,133 posts)jberryhill
(62,444 posts)AtheistCrusader
(33,982 posts)Hekate
(100,133 posts)tavernier
(14,443 posts)P.T. Barnum
Tipperary
(6,930 posts)Facility Inspector
(615 posts)and everyone ragged on her, all y'all owe her an apology.
SheilaT
(23,156 posts)I doubt anyone will apologize, but that's not very important. I do wish people would look back at the old threads to get a sense of what has happened starting back in February. I have 14 threads bookmarked, counting this one. I will happily send the full list to anyone who cares to PM me. I don't have anyone at all on ignore, so even if we sparred in the past, you'll get through to me.
I find it most interesting that J J has now started two threads hoping to get some sort of help for TTW and Yoshi, and never posts again after the OP. Not sure what to make of that.
Hekate
(100,133 posts)Codeine
(25,586 posts)alphafemale
(18,497 posts)And I am sorry for the tone my language took.
But I saw this coming.
I had experienced this type of behavior and emotional blackmail since the time I was a child.
I could see the pattern. I did not want people to caught up in that malicious maelstrom and I did get frustrated.
There are people that want the drama and to portray themselves as the victims. They invent ever elaborate stories involving basically everyone in their lives.
They often lash out at people trying to help.
I would not be surprised to learn that TTW is on another site recounting how she was abused and victimized...here.
Perhaps we can put some of the ill feelings aside.
I do ultimately admire the people that tried to help. I'm sorry you were treated that way.
Facility Inspector
(615 posts)The manipulation, hustling, and bullying was a trigger event for me.
You don't have to explain yourself, but yes that emotional blackmail evil bullshit can definitely awaken some dormant memories.
Facility Inspector
(615 posts)got conned.
Straight up gaffled and grifted.
woolldog
(8,791 posts)DUers are, by in large, very kind hearted but gullible people. Make a great target for scammers like TTW. Some of the more cynical DUers spotted this a mile away.
Couple this disaster with the recent thread seeking $$ for an individual who turned out to be a felon recently convicted of unspeakable crimes and, well, there's not a good track record of this type of thing working out
Lil Missy
(17,865 posts)geek tragedy
(68,868 posts)Hekate
(100,133 posts)Sadly, she self-deleted the OP, but enough comments remain to let you know that Msanthrope and her ex bent over backwards to try to help, in person. M's ex even took Yoshi into his own home -- and Yoshi, a very large and aggressive breed, backed him into a corner and threatened him. For the sake of other pets and children, Yoshi could not stay.
The thread devolved into the usual DU infighting, but the basic info was and is there. You should take it to heart.
TTW is demonstrably unstable and unable to care for such a dog, who given his circumstances is also unstable -- and dangerous.
And now, for their pains, Msanthrope and her ex are under legal threat from TTW.
More money from DU? Not even remotely a good idea any more.
LiberalAndProud
(12,799 posts)You post one thread with a negative outcome and now here we are with another, as if you expect this one to go in a different direction. What's your deal J_J_? Because I have serious doubt that this repeat is motivated by a sincere desire to assist TTW. Color me skeptical.
AngryOldDem
(14,180 posts)People know where to go if they want to send money.
Nothing got accomplished in the thread posted over the weekend, and this one seems to be headed the same way. I know people are worried, and they care, and that's great -- but this is a situation DU can obviously no longer handle.
AtheistCrusader
(33,982 posts)Game over man, Game Over!
(quick, to the alertmobile!)
nruthie
(466 posts)But not the kind of help to be found from anyone other than professionally trained counselors. My sympathy ran out several months ago unfortunately. There is probably a good reason why even her family has washed their hands of her. I pity the dog, but this saga is getting old. We can see what happened when people tried their best to help. Some situations really are hopeless.
.
Butterbean
(1,014 posts)is doing the same thing and expecting different results. Apply that concept to helping TTW.
The Velveteen Ocelot
(130,525 posts)Last edited Tue Aug 11, 2015, 05:53 PM - Edit history (1)
has gone way beyond the ability of anyone other than a professional counselor. The people who went out of their way to try to help TTW in person are now her "enemies" and she is trying to get them in trouble with law enforcement. I really hope for a good outcome for TTW and her dog someday but there really is nothing we can do any more.
Curmudgeoness
(18,219 posts)is to hold onto the money that you can spare in case Msanthrope needs any money to help with legal issues. And I would hope that Msanthrope will come here to DU for help in covering any expenses, if they do occur.
REP
(21,691 posts)That if she cannot pay the bill for the doggie daycare that is housing her beloved dog, she will have difficulty raising enough money to pay the retainer to hire a lawyer to take on a frivolous lawsuit against two lawyers.
Curmudgeoness
(18,219 posts)even if they don't go far, it can still be a problem. But I was not aware that Msanthrope and her ex were lawyers...that helps.
pnwmom
(110,260 posts)but it could be a major annoyance to have to fight this.
REP
(21,691 posts)I've been in a similar situation (though the accusations were far more serious). I was investigated and since the accusations were groundless, I didn't need to do anything except keep living my life.
Shrike47
(6,913 posts)Nobody will ever do enough for her because she is a bottomless well of empty. Too bad about the dog but I'm glad it's not a child.
Codeine
(25,586 posts)Those experiences pretty much inform my reading of this situation.
msanthrope
(37,549 posts)cwydro
(51,308 posts)Perhaps mental illness as well, but certainly drug use. TTW refused legitimate offers of lodging, as evidence by other posters in this thread.
TTW wanted money. Period.
Demit
(11,238 posts)I wonder if that was a euphemism for something she was using to self-medicate. But I remember thinking at the time, if she's on that kind of medication (which was believable in light of the frantic, run-on tone of her writing) she's got a doctor…so she's paying for the meds & doctor visits & presumably health insurance. And an ISP to keep her internet connection. No mention of soon having to give any of those things up, however.
cwydro
(51,308 posts)and they're not cheap. I found that odd since she was also talking about how others were trying to get her mental health help.
I'm sorry, but I'm one of the skeptics...to me, there is too much that does not make sense.
Having known someone with a severe disorder who tried to self-medicate and also saw a psychiatrist, I've seen how it's like pulling teeth to get that person to get proper treatment, and once they've found a doctor, they can be very leery of "outside" mental health practioners. If a person is still competent, as seems to be the case here (and I mean in the legal sense, not in the "good at getting things done" sense"
, getting caught up in the System probably sounds like a nightmare.
The symptoms of long-time use of some substances can mimic certain psychiatric disorders, and some psychiatric disorders can be mistaken for substance abuse. I don't know what's the case here, but I do that fixing her life from afar isn't possible. Even up close would require extraordinary measures.
Codeine
(25,586 posts)People don't tend to come back from crystal meth, certainly not all the way back. Brain chemistry is haywire after that shit.
I don't know any tweakers so no experience there but I seem to hale from Disturbia.
SheilaT
(23,156 posts)reference to meds was to indicate she wouldn't take them. It's an oblique reference in one of the early threads and open to interpretation, but I think one of the basic problems with her is that she probably should be on some kind of medication and is not.
Also the various references to how a case worker could help her completely miss the point that she is not at all open to suggestions that she receive help of any kind. Again, look at the early threads, and here are links to the first four of a total of fourteen, including this one:
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10026597184 Apr 30, 2015
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10026473464 Apr 5, 2015
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10026442802 Mar 31, 2015
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10026221474 Feb 13, 2015
Demit
(11,238 posts)"I also need to get my anxiety meds but I have to do an appointment with the shrink before he can write another prescription. I do have enough for I think another week, and I'm really nervous about that because you have to be weaned on/off them, and I'm barely holding it together as it is - without them I won't be able to function."
Maybe she did mention later not wanting to take them… lol, I do NOT want to get sucked in again to those rambling, repetitive posts, with all their extravagant & gratuitous detail. Except when it came time to address a question like 'How exactly did the the water heater breaking get you fired?' As far as I remember, she kept eliding past that. Other posters would begin to surmise why and she would let them fill in the blanks.
SheilaT
(23,156 posts)If she needs her anxiety meds, why would she run the risk of not having any, by delaying the dr. appt. Yet another of the many things that don't quite add up in her lengthy and convoluted story.
yardwork
(69,364 posts)CreekDog
(46,192 posts)I'm sure most charitable givers would prefer to givd to someone who isn't doing that to someone who helped out.
Tipperary
(6,930 posts)I hope she gets the help she needs but i am disgusted by a person who would put her dog through this misery. I had to go hug and kiss my big boys just to reassure them (myself) that I would NEVER treat them this way. Shame on you TTW, shame on you.
Curmudgeoness
(18,219 posts)I think that she loves Yoshi as much as someone loves their child. But she is not mentally able to handle all that is happening and she cannot find a way to part with Yoshi. I am not defending her actions, but I will defend her attachment to her dog. She just doesn't see what the dog is going through, possibly because she is going through things that are even worse. I just wish that she could get the help she needs before things get worse.
Texasgal
(17,240 posts)TTW really does love and care for Yoshi. She has taken care of him fro a very long time before all of this happened.
We need to remember that her bottom fell out from under her, there are many on DU that are just a paycheck away from devastation! Coupled with some emotional issues things have gotten worse for her.
Please so not spread this. It is simply untrue.
redstateblues
(10,565 posts)for this person and her dog?
cwydro
(51,308 posts)You are not a fool - only a good person. But please read her previous threads before you donate again.
Something is very wrong here on many levels.
AngryOldDem
(14,180 posts)You donated from a good and generous place within yourself.
Nothing foolish about that.
Just take care going forward.
alphafemale
(18,497 posts)just remember that most people needing help are so distraugth they are only going to be able to manage a few lines or a paragraph or two,
A rambling narrative that is thousands of words and ever more complex? Especially if the writer relates that EVERYONE is against them.
Back away.
But don't let this harden your heart to helping others.
Marrah_G
(28,581 posts)I remember when I needed help I was in a total panic and could barely think straight. It was also incredibly difficult and humiliating to ask for help.
Hekate
(100,133 posts)
AtheistCrusader
(33,982 posts)cwydro
(51,308 posts)I noticed that each thread by this OP was what most of us would call a "drive by".
No subsequent post by the OP.
TBF
(36,665 posts)foo_bar
(4,193 posts)Shit stirrer's an important job from the point of view of aerobic bacteria, that's how DU compost is made. But yeah, they should try a little harder than "Hey! Maybe somebody can find a solution on the internet! I bet no one thought of that!"
SidDithers
(44,333 posts)If you know what I mean.
Sid
m-lekktor
(3,675 posts)why would anybody want to keep this up after all that has gone on with this issue thus far including the kind people who have gone out of their way to try to help and have been shat upon and abused. it's like some bizarre enabler fetish.
Corgigal
(9,298 posts)Why? I thought of it this way, son is in college and I have available space. If the crap hit the fan at my home, and I was going to be homeless but all I had was my corgi dog ( who passed 3 weeks ago), I would have actually consider it. She turned around in 15 mins, or so, and said no. Didn't PM me, nothing. So, I'm sorry I thought she was a con, with a possible borderline personality complex.
I'm not a damn serial killer, yes someone here typed that, I'm just a person who imagined what I would do. I won't give her a damn dime. I went to my local spca over the weekend. People got to assist something close to you and leave this be. You're just sweet people, you assisted me with sugarbears surgery years back, and she lived for years healthy because of that help. I will never forget that, this I dumped months ago.
Codeine
(25,586 posts)Count your stars you didn't have that basket case invade your life.
Corgigal
(9,298 posts)No good deed goes unpunished.
pecwae
(8,021 posts)hear about your sweet Sugarbears.
avebury
(11,196 posts)is that you might have a difficult getting her out again. There have been cases where people have had to go through an eviction process to get someone out of their home.
alphafemale
(18,497 posts)I would almost be willing to bet the "evil" landlord is also someone that originally gave TTW a break somehow.
Lee-Lee
(6,324 posts)Get to a call- "I want this person out of my house".
"Has the person every paid rent, paid a bill or shared expenses?"
"They helped with a power bill but we don't have a lease they are a guest this apartment is in my name and I want them out"
"Sorry, if they helped you with any bills they are a tenant under the law. Here is the address of the magistrates office you will have to do a formal eviction."
Saw that several times a week- usually an ill-advised house guest or a quick to move in boyfriend/girlfriend that went south.
alphafemale
(18,497 posts)I am beginning to doubt she ever cared about the dog.
It was just a pawn.
I hope a way can be found to save the dog but its death will be useful to her continuing drama.
She will get another animal.
Repeat.
REP
(21,691 posts)I won't bother anyone with my armchair guesses as to her diagnoses, aside from they are among the hardest to treat and tend worsen with age and stress. I will say that I believe these disorders cloud her judgment so much that she really thinks she is doing the best things to keep her dog with her.
One of the cruelest things about what I suspect may be her disorders is they often render their sufferers unhelpable. It's not really the person who is acting so outrageously; it's the disease and its trying to kill her. Unfortunately there's not a damn thing any of us can do about it.
Yo_Mama
(8,303 posts)I hate it when people call someone who is suffering like this a scammer. That she is not.
But it's also clear that this is a case where there are multiple issues and just money isn't sufficient.
Curmudgeoness
(18,219 posts)Probably more than anything else. In better times, she was always posting his pictures and videos. She was always making toys for him and they were so cute. The Pets group was full of her posts about Yoshi. I do not doubt that he means everything to her. And that makes this all the harder for her.
Curmudgeoness
(18,219 posts)if she were willing to move across the state. I figured that would be better for her than being homeless. I never heard anything from her about it. I am thankful now, but at the time it seemed like what I would be so grateful for...a place to live when I will be on the street.
I am so sorry to hear that you just lost your dog. It is never easy.
Corgigal
(9,298 posts)I am in South Carolina, however she claimed to have a car, so I thought a 7/8 hour drive is better then homeless. With you're supposed loved pet by your side. Anyone can be scammed, and not all people can be helped. We did our best, time to breathe and relax.
Curmudgeoness
(18,219 posts)I am now afraid to ever help another person who I do not know personally....and that is a sad thing.
I still don't know that this was a scam. I don't think it was. I just think that she wanted too much...to find a place where she didn't have to move, and keeps the dog, and finds the perfect job, etc. And she just wanted breathing room that suited her. She is having some real mental health issues and I wish that she would get help.
avebury
(11,196 posts)problems, no real progress can be made. As a result, she will continue to come back to DU to ask for people to bail her out - again and again.
That is like bailing out a boat with a can that has holes in it. I feel sorry for Yoshi, because as much as TTW claims to love the dog, she is putting herself above the needs of her dog. That is an accident waiting to happen
And if anybody tries to help her out with a plan that can actually help her make progress and she doesn't agree with them, there is a real risk that she will try to cause legal problems for the good samaritans. Talk about biting the hand that feeds you.
Curmudgeoness
(18,219 posts)Originally, it seemed that all she needed was a way to get on her feet and get her life back on track. And I had room. It just seemed like the right thing to do for someone in a bad situation. Who knew.
bettyellen
(47,209 posts)bettyellen
(47,209 posts)Curmudgeoness
(18,219 posts)But I do have empathy, and it just seemed like she needed to get her life back on track at the beginning of this. And I have been told that I don't do justice to my screen name more times than I can count...they just don't know me well enough. 
beam me up scottie
(57,349 posts)And I agree you dodged a bullet, Yoshi might have killed your friend.
Marrah_G
(28,581 posts)DU came to my rescue not to long ago and helped me out from a very difficult spot. I was incredibly grateful.
I hope this one episode does not stop people from helping the next time a DUer has some real needs.
foo_bar
(4,193 posts)I mean it couldn't be a scam, she was very upfront about using the money for totally quixotic purposes like fighting eviction in court from a house she couldn't stand to live in. I mean it sounds like a poor investment as charity goes, but maybe it ultimately benefits the people around TTW like her landlord and pro bono dog rescuers. Tho at this point any bucks will probably go to the Prosecute Msanthrope Fund, I sense an Orly Taitz in the making.
kdmorris
(5,649 posts)There was something too weird about this situation from the start. I never thought that TTW was a con artist or anything, but she seemed like the type of person that needed mental health help - not just money thrown her way. There was something just off...
I imagine that many felt the same way. This incident will not keep me from helping other DUers when I'm able to and I think that most people here feel the same.
(I hope anyway).
Arugula Latte
(50,566 posts)For example, there was that thread when she was asking for money and then, *poof*, nevermind, some friend from California came through with $4,000. I was left scratching my head on that one.
kdmorris
(5,649 posts)Now...those people who tried the hardest to help her are being demonized, as well.
It makes me sad, but I can't commit money to helping someone who money will not fully help.
Gormy Cuss
(30,884 posts)Lots of help offered, nothing resolved in part because nothing is ever right/good enough. I don't presume to know what the story was with either one of them but at a certain point it seemed obvious that remote offers of assistance or cash just weren't going to work. It''s frustrating.
kdmorris
(5,649 posts)It IS frustrating. I really wanted to help bobbolink, but got attacked many times by her because my help was not the right type of help. I've been homeless, and I know how humiliating it is, but to attack anyone who tries to help was definitely a mental health issue.
I hope she is well and got the help she needed, where ever she is.
Hekate
(100,133 posts)Was excoriated by her until I learned to never engage. God knows where she is now, and I hope she's doing better -- but honestly I periodically look over my shoulder to see if she's come back under another name.
mnhtnbb
(33,348 posts)to inquire whether what Yoshi has been put through--and now back at the doggie daycare/boarding
with little hope of being picked up by TTW to move into stable housing--rises to the level of neglect/
abuse of an animal under Pennsylvania law? Because if the SPCA feel they can make a case, they
would have reason to remove Yoshi and perhaps ultimately get him to the Akita rescue group.
It would really be better for someone who's had interaction with TTW--by PM, phone, or in person--
to make that call to the SPCA.
To me, it seems about the only thing anyone can do to help Yoshi at this point. I have said previously
that the kind of help that TTW needs cannot be provided by DU, because until she faces her need
for serious mental health treatment, throwing money at her unemployed/living situation is not going
to help.
CTyankee
(68,198 posts)and some others in a special place on DU. Maybe a group which besides having a place to plead one's case also lists resources such as gofundme and others. Having them in GD begets the same back and forth accusations we see time and time again and it is wearying. We have other groups/forums that have rules about what can/cannot be posted and we should have dedicated space to these appeals as well.
Just a thought...
underahedgerow
(1,232 posts)The only thing she has left in the world, take it away.
The animal is private property. Unless it's been abandoned, is being abused or badly neglected, the SPCA cannot take her dog from her by force.
cwydro
(51,308 posts)which she told Moosepoop was awful, neglectful, and Yoshi was ill.
You can't take a dog from a person who does not have the dog. The dog is spending night and day at this place from what I understand.
According to misanthrope, TTW has not paid the day care place. That sounds like abandonment to me.
I have had animals my entire life; never would I allow one to have to undergo what TTW is putting Yoshi through.
I don't think she cares about that dog except to raise money. She was able to raise $1000 on DU once she put her plight in terms of Yoshi's suffering. Once again, when someone stepped in to offer real help, she turned on them.
I find this whole episode (the sixth now, I think) to be horrific. Anyone who would allow their animal to suffer is simply unconscionable. It makes me want to cry to think of that dog alone and confused, bewildered and deserted.
underahedgerow
(1,232 posts)of water and hopefully is getting some exercise. He is hardly suffering compared to the animals that end up in the shelters due to neglect and abuse.
Do not blame this woman for the condition she is in, the state her dog is in and the state her life is in. She is mentally ill and not capable of making rational decisions. At least the dog is in a safe, warm and caring place for the time being. That's not a bad thing. There is no need to pin human sentiment onto the animal's disposition. For all we know he's glad to be rid of her, everyone else sure is. Hell, he was probably pissed when she showed up at the shelter.
When the time comes that the dog daycare can no longer look after the animal, or TTW disappears, the daycare owner can seek legal means to have the animal put into a rescue or relinquished to the shelter. For all we know, that action could already be in the works, so everyone just needs to back up and stay out of the situation from here on out.
Pisses me off that people here care more about the damn dog than the human.
cwydro
(51,308 posts)has had no choice in this entire debacle.
I won't go over all the proof in the pudding as to TTW's actions. They're clearly there for anyone to read in any of the multitude of begging threads.
I care about a helpless creature who has been put in situation, which we were led to believe by TTW was neglectful.
How do you know the dog is safe and fine? No doubt it's "warm," because it's freaking August here. Is the dog in a crate? I don't consider that a good place for a large dog.
"Hopefully getting some exercise" ???? Really?
Have you had large dogs?
How do you know TTW is mentally ill? Because of the armchair diagnoses here on DU? I see a woman who has made bad choices since the days she "wiped her ass with $10 bills." Those were her words.
She might have done better to save those bills.
underahedgerow
(1,232 posts)dogs, hunting dogs, house dogs, yard dogs. I spent more than 10 years working with Animal Control and have been around, had, handled, owned, adopted, fostered, saved, put down, rescued, re-homed, kept, and gave away allllllll types of animals from effing Wide Rhinos, Snow Leopards and penguins, to mice, cats, dogs and hissing cockroaches, tarantulas and snakes and lizards, all. my. life. since I was a little kid. I won't even bother listing the farm animals.
I know animals, and I specialize in dogs. He's fine, he's a dog. No, it's not optimal being in a crate for most of the day, but he's safe for now. He's not being abused, he has food, water and shelter. The sentiment here is the same as the people who call Animal Control when they see a homeless dude living on the street with their dog. If the animal is not being neglected or abused, there is nothing AC can do. This is the same for Yoshi, and he's in a much better place than tied to a shopping cart right now.
Of course TTW is mentally ill. Are her actions those of a rational person? Would her social worker have tried to sneak her into a mental health facility if she were a balanced and functioning person? My brother was a schizophrenic, and I've studied abnormal psychology and read enough to recognize the basic symptoms. None of her actions are those of a person 'making bad choices'. They're the actions of a person in the paranoid schizophrenic spectrum. Sane enough to know she's nuts, but nuts enough to be incapable of seeking effective treatment on her own.
Even debating the existence of her mental illness/personality disorder is ridiculous, it's so very evident.
cwydro
(51,308 posts)I'm not going to apologize for caring for the dog.
I've read her threads lately, and I've read her earlier threads. She's not someone for whom I have sympathy.
I do have sympathy for the dog.
I'm not arguing with you; I completely get your point. No, she is not rational. I have a Psych degree, but I'm not qualified to diagnose someone in person or online.
Anyway, we just have different viewpoints. I've known people like her. I recognized them in her posts. It bothers me. I have complete respect for your point of view.
I think it's time for me to trash this thread...all of us really just keep going over the same ground. No idea why the OP posted it, but I give up on threads at a certain post count.
underahedgerow
(1,232 posts)I'm not qualified but it's a pretty safe bet on the diagnosis.
I have every bit as much sympathy for her as I do any other person with a disease, mental or physical. Everyone deserves compassion.
Here we are, doing everything we can for both of them. Which is nothing, right?
So agreed, time to trash the thread!!!
Cheeeers! xoxoxo
Response to underahedgerow (Reply #200)
Tipperary This message was self-deleted by its author.
Gormy Cuss
(30,884 posts)and the dog has no right to his own say in the matter. TTW on the other hand has rights and autonomy that prevent even well-meaning interventions unless and until she is willing to accept them.
IOW, people know how to fix the dog's situation. Her situation, not so much.
Captain Stern
(2,253 posts)But, if there was, it would be this line:
Hell, he was probably pissed when she showed up at the shelter.
The picture I made in my head when I read this made me laugh. I couldn't help it.
cwydro
(51,308 posts)Many of us are curious about that.
TTW has literally bitten the hand that helped her in respect to misanthrope, as well as others who donated in good faith.
Maybe you could self-delete this and save everyone any further embarrassment.
NCTraveler
(30,481 posts)If it's too good to be true, don't contact them. If they don't have a contract, don't give them money. It is currently one of the best resources out there. Owners working on their own and Real Estate Agents alike are using it. Trulia.com can also help but they don't update often enough. It gets frustrating calling on their adds just to find out they were rented a week ago.
Recursion
(56,582 posts)(And, yes, I will periodically repeat this on these threads.)
"Misunderstanding" doesn't convey it well. It may be perfectly true, but it is not what the Vedas teach, nor what Gautama taught.
The western idea is that karma is a cosmic store of merit and demerit: virtuous actions build up a store of merit for the soul, while vicious actions build up a store of demerit. This leads to the statement "karma will make Rumsfeld be reborn as an Iraqi child."
There's nothing wrong with this idea per se, and it's quite attractive in some ways, but I think the historical teachings are probably worth considering.The historical notion of karma says something quite different. Rebirth is not a punishment or reward, but a repetition of a failed lesson. In this model, Donald Rumsfeld does not come back as an Iraqi kid, but rather as the exactly same thing he was before, over and over again, until he gets it right.
Or as Vivekananda said, "The lesson will be repeated until it is learned."
I once again offer this point on a TTW thread, deliberately with no implication as to which parties it does and doesn't apply to.
Captain Stern
(2,253 posts)I'm sorry I was wrong.
If this had been a scam (as in someone being dishonest to just make a few bucks), the worst thing that would actually be going on, is that a lot of people would have each lost a little bit of money. Far worse things happen every day.
As it is, it's a really sad situation that's probably going to get worse, before it gets better...if it ever does get better.
I wish it had just all been a scam.
ladyVet
(1,587 posts)they might consider donating to the day care where Yoshi is. It would help these folks feed him, and maybe buy a crate suitable for him.
Whatever the dog's issues, they aren't his fault. He's in a bad spot and has no resources to change anything for himself.