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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsThe Woo Boat
http://scienceblogs.com/insolence/2015/08/14/the-woo-boat/File this one under the category: You cant make stuff like this up. (At least, I cant.)
Lets say youre a die hard all-conspiracy conspiracy theorist and alternative medicine believer (a not uncommon combination). You love Alex Jones and Mike Adams and agree with their rants that there is a New World Order trying to suppress your rights. You strongly believe that vaccines not only cause autism, sudden infant death syndrome, a shaken baby-like syndrome, autoimmune diseases, sudden ovarian failure, and even outright death but are a depopulation plot hatched by Bill Gates and the Illuminati who support his agenda. Heck, you even believe that black helicopters are keeping an eye on those who have discovered this plot. To you, genetically modified organisms (GMOs) are part of the same plot, pure poison and pure evil. And, of course, you just know that there is a cure for cancernay, cures for all diseasesout there but those evil pharmaceutical companies are keeping them from the people, the better to bolster their profits, just as they are preventing Brave Maverick Doctors like Andrew Wakefield, Mark Geier, and Sherri Tenpenny from telling the world the truth about vaccines. Heck, you just know that these same nefarious forces are even going so far as to kill vaccine skeptic heroes like Jeff Bradstreet (and, of course, make it look like a suicide) and holistic pioneers like Nicholas Gonzalez (and make it look like a heart attack).
And you like cruises.
So where do you go when you want to go on a cruise? Normal cruises are filled with people who just want to have a good time and tend to roll their eyes when you regale them with your ideas about how there is a shadowy conspiracy out there that is promoting toxic pharmaceuticals and vaccines and preventing natural cures from being used by the people, while simultaneously promoting GMOs to make people sick so that they think they need more of those pharmaceuticals and vaccines and more pliable so that their New World Order agenda faces less opposition. By the time you get to how theyre also using chemtrails as another means of control, AIDS is not caused by HIV, and ebola can be cured with homeopathy, in other words, by the time youve been on the cruise a couple of days, youll find yourself basically shunned, eating alone at dinner, and drinking alone at the bar. When you sit down at a table, everyone suddenly finds a reason to be elsewhere.
Fear not! There is now a cruise for you. See the Conspira-Sea Cruise next January, embarking in Los Angeles and taking you on a cruise through the Mexican Riviera:
Lets say youre a die hard all-conspiracy conspiracy theorist and alternative medicine believer (a not uncommon combination). You love Alex Jones and Mike Adams and agree with their rants that there is a New World Order trying to suppress your rights. You strongly believe that vaccines not only cause autism, sudden infant death syndrome, a shaken baby-like syndrome, autoimmune diseases, sudden ovarian failure, and even outright death but are a depopulation plot hatched by Bill Gates and the Illuminati who support his agenda. Heck, you even believe that black helicopters are keeping an eye on those who have discovered this plot. To you, genetically modified organisms (GMOs) are part of the same plot, pure poison and pure evil. And, of course, you just know that there is a cure for cancernay, cures for all diseasesout there but those evil pharmaceutical companies are keeping them from the people, the better to bolster their profits, just as they are preventing Brave Maverick Doctors like Andrew Wakefield, Mark Geier, and Sherri Tenpenny from telling the world the truth about vaccines. Heck, you just know that these same nefarious forces are even going so far as to kill vaccine skeptic heroes like Jeff Bradstreet (and, of course, make it look like a suicide) and holistic pioneers like Nicholas Gonzalez (and make it look like a heart attack).
And you like cruises.
So where do you go when you want to go on a cruise? Normal cruises are filled with people who just want to have a good time and tend to roll their eyes when you regale them with your ideas about how there is a shadowy conspiracy out there that is promoting toxic pharmaceuticals and vaccines and preventing natural cures from being used by the people, while simultaneously promoting GMOs to make people sick so that they think they need more of those pharmaceuticals and vaccines and more pliable so that their New World Order agenda faces less opposition. By the time you get to how theyre also using chemtrails as another means of control, AIDS is not caused by HIV, and ebola can be cured with homeopathy, in other words, by the time youve been on the cruise a couple of days, youll find yourself basically shunned, eating alone at dinner, and drinking alone at the bar. When you sit down at a table, everyone suddenly finds a reason to be elsewhere.
Fear not! There is now a cruise for you. See the Conspira-Sea Cruise next January, embarking in Los Angeles and taking you on a cruise through the Mexican Riviera:
How awesome is that?
Sid
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The Woo Boat (Original Post)
SidDithers
Aug 2015
OP
Wait! Woo caused our reptilian Illuminati overlords to fail in depopulating the planet!
freshwest
Aug 2015
#4
lob1
(3,820 posts)1. Get on that cruise and they'll never let you back in the United States.
It's all a plot by the NSA, the NRA, and the PTA.
mike_c
(36,281 posts)2. I don't always agree with Sid....
?t=1439688587
Crunchy Frog
(26,579 posts)3. Some people are very skilled
At making people made out of straw.
freshwest
(53,661 posts)4. Wait! Woo caused our reptilian Illuminati overlords to fail in depopulating the planet!
We're multiplying like rabbits!
Maybe they are behind organic, non-GMO, vegan food for healthier eating. Not for our health, theirs. They take us down into underground tunnels and eat us, or so Infowars says. Consider this, too:
Maybe they are behind organic, non-GMO, vegan food for healthier eating. Not for our health, theirs. They take us down into underground tunnels and eat us, or so Infowars says. Consider this, too: