13 year old boy faces assault charges for kiss made on a dare at Md. middle school

[philosslayer]

Baltimore County Police and Baltimore County school officials responded to a report of assault involving two eighth-grade students at Pikesville Middle School on Wednesday.

School officials took a report regarding a 13-year-old boy who kissed a 14-year-old girl during school hours. The unwanted kiss was allegedly the result of a dare made by students.

Police confirm that the boy is now facing a second-degree assault charge as a juvenile. No one was injured during the incident, police say, and disciplinary actions related to suspension or expulsion will be handled by the school system.

http://wjla.com/news/nation-world/boy-faces-assault-charges-for-kiss-made-on-a-dare-at-md-middle-school

[RKP5637]

1. I often wonder where I live anymore. When I was a kid, this would have been handled by a teacher

and over and done with. Worse, would be a march to the principals office. Now, a potential second-degree assault charge as a juvenile. Oh, I live in such a WTF world anymore.

[Matariki]

22. When I was a kid it wouldn't have been handled at all

and people would have said "boys will be boys" an put the blame on the girl.

So while it's very very bad that police are getting involved in school disciplinary stuff I am heartened that that kind of behavior is taken much more seriously than it was in the past.

[RadiationTherapy]

2. It's not ok to touch someone's body with your body without permission.

A point that a 13 year old can write a report about rather than be charged with a crime.

[Initech]

5. But second degree assault? Isn't that going a bit too far?

Fuck the prison system in this country. They're the real criminals in all of this.

[yeoman6987]

26. For years girls have been thought hell and back

This is great news. Might make other boys think twice about assaulting the next girl. Things are slowly improving in this country.

[CC]

54. No it is not.

By 8th grade boys/teens should know it is not ok to force yourself on another. If his parents didn't bother teaching him by now someone has too. BTW per the local news, "Police say they interviewed a 14-year-old girl, an 8th grader at the school, who says her 13-year-old classmate grabbed her shirt near her stomach and “open mouth kissed her with his tongue.” http://baltimore.cbslocal.com/2015/09/12/boy-facing-assault-charge-for-kissing-classmate-at-pikesville-middle-school/

It is in juvenile court, he has already been released to his mother. With luck he will get punished, hopefully some training what consent is and how to control himself, even when dared. If he learns and stays out of trouble he can get his record cleared. That is if they don't give him PBJ from the start. May even save him a rape charge one day when his friends dare him to take a turn after a night of binge drinking.

[gollygee]

62. He's being charged as a juvenile so he couldn't go to prison

And what he did is indeed 2nd degree assault. I would not support him being charged as an adult, but I don't see why he shouldn't be charged for exactly what he did.

[Blue_Adept]

63. Because these are teachable moments

Not charge him as a criminal moment.

It's like people here can't remember what it's like to be a teenager

To deal with peer pressure

It's in no way excusing what he did, but it's a situation that should be handled entirely within the school system itself and not through the police or the courts.

[gollygee]

64. Yeah it's a teachable moment

For him and the kids who dared him. They need to be taught that this is assault, and that assault is a crime and a big deal. Juvenile court is where that's taught.

[Kotya]

6. Zero tolerance policies

Have pretty much tied the hands of school administration to mete out appropriate punishments.

A butter knife is the same as a switchblade. Midol is the same as Oxy. A kiss on a dare is the same as an unwanted groping.

Easier (and safer for your career) to just treat them all the same than it is to make a judgment call that may come back to bite you in the ass later.

[DirkGently]

13. That is it, exactly.

Add to that a view that public schools should either be profit centers for private companies or pre-prison for the poor, and it only gets worse.

[Eleanors38]

41. Zero Tolerance, courtesy of the WOD.

[damnedifIknow]

3. Well I feel safer now that the bandit kisser was apprehended

This is ludicrous.

[Initech]

4. So an innocent prank introduces a 13 year old to the American prison system.

Welcome to the United Police State Of America. Go directly to jail. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. Fuck this shit.

[cantbeserious]

29. Enslavement Of The Mind Must Start Early - Else Non Conformance Becomes Rampant

eom

[exboyfil]

60. I don't consider grabbing someone and open mouth kissing them

to be a prank. That is assault. I would pursue it if it was my child that had been forced upon.

This stuff stays with children. I know. The assaulter had a choice and choose unwisely.

[Juicy_Bellows]

7. Some educational video just because it made me think of it:

[yuiyoshida]

44. Love that accent he has

You don't get to hear it to often... I guess we can't refer to this affair as the Kiss of Death, but damn, it sure comes close.

[Johnyawl]

8. How is this not a part of the rape culture?

Where do you think 20 year old frat boys get the idea it's okay to date rape drunken coeds? Do you think they wait until college to start ignoring the concept of consent?

And no, I don't think he should go to jail but I'm fine with him being charged with juvenile assault, so that every boy in that middle school - hell, every boy in that school district - learns that even a simple kiss between adolescents REQUIRES CONSENT.

[Snobblevitch]

9. Are you for real?

[Johnyawl]

10. Are you?

You tell me how this doesn't teach boys that consent means nothing. This is exactly the age that the lesson needs to be taught if we're ever going to change the culture.

If you have something intelligent to add to the conversation, weight in.

[Snobblevitch]

12. The boy should be told that he cannot kiss a classmate without her consent.

He should not be charged with assault. He did not take off her pants and pebetrate her for crying out loud. He simply gave her a kiss on a dare. Don't make a 13 year old a registered sex offender because of a kiss.

[Kotya]

17. I guess it's fair to ask what kind of kiss this was.

Did he run up and give her a peck on the cheek? Or did he hold her down and try to stick his tongue down her mouth?

Maybe there's more to the story.

[CC]

55. Actually per local news he grabbed her shirt

and open mouth kissed her and using his tongue. Shame they suspend both students for fighting because when I was 14 I would of beat the living shit out of any boy that forced himself on me. Then again my mother wouldn't of punished me for defending my personal space either.

[Matariki]

65. Yep, that's assault all right.

Interesting how most people picture a peck on the cheek and argue from that false conclusion.

Do you have a link to the local news?

[CC]

81. Not much more info in

the local but here it is. http://baltimore.cbslocal.com/2015/09/12/boy-facing-assault-charge-for-kissing-classmate-at-pikesville-middle-school/

I'm hoping his "punishment" is along the lines of behavior counseling and probation before judgment. Without more info it is hard to say he should have much more than that.

[treestar]

68. Poor girl

and people are calling him "innocent."

[treestar]

37. What about her?

that would be pretty disgusting. What if you were forced into a kiss with someone you didn't like/know? Seems people are minimizing how that must have been for the 14 year old girl.

[Snobblevitch]

46. He should apologize to her and he should be punished, by the school system, not the courts.

[treestar]

47. It's an unpermitted touching

which falls under criminal law. The most minor charge there is, Offensive Touching. The line starts there. He needs to learn that before he's an adult.

[Snobblevitch]

49. I would agree with you if he groped her.

It was a kiss. I don't believe the right thing to do is to ruin the life of a 13 year old boy because of a kiss. I wonder what the girl believes should have to him?

[treestar]

66. A kiss is an unpermitted touching

why is it any different from "groping?" In a way it is worse as she can come into contact with bodily fluids. It makes no sense to dismiss this. And as I said, he better learn before he is an adult he can't do this. His life is not "ruined." It will be ruined by people playing it down so that he ends up in real legal trouble as an adult, not having learned.

And again, no concern for her at all. Imagine being a 14 year old girl and subjected to that. You seem to think she is a non-entity.

[Scootaloo]

76. I would say shoving your tongue into someone's mouth is on par with "groping"

And it's not going to ruin his life. he's being charged as a minor, won't face prison time, and will have the record expunged when he turns 18.

[Nuclear Unicorn]

18. "If you have something intelligent to add to the conversation, weight in."

The expression is, "weigh in."

You tell me how this doesn't teach boys that consent means nothing.

Which can be done without resorting to charges of sexual assault -- which it wasn't.

[Sheldon Cooper]

20. Thanks for speaking out. I wish more folks would.

[hifiguy]

30. Put down the crack pipe.

Seriously.

[davidn3600]

11. More waste of resources

The school couldnt handle this themselves? Now we have to get the police, the courts, lawyers, judges, and corrections involved because of a stupid kiss on a dare?

This country is a joke.

[B Calm]

14. I had a girl in the 7th grade do that to me in the hallway. But, I liked it!

That's the difference. Actually it built up my ego and made me less afraid of girls. Assault charges is ridiculous!

[MineralMan]

15. As a teenager, I never kissed a girl without her permission.

I went to a small school, and my high school graduating class only had 104 students. During those four years, I probably kissed half of the girls in my class, and many others in other classes. Some, I asked, "Could I kiss you?" Others turned up their faces and closed their eyes at some point, offering open permission.

Simple.

[Daninmo]

16. So what happens to the boy?

Since he is a 13 year old juvenile, won't it disappear when he turns 18 or so and becomes an adult? I seriously doubt any judge will put this boy in jail for an unauthorized kiss, especially a first offense.

[tavernier]

19. There are a couple of TV advertisements

that show a scenario of a young nerdish looking boy getting up the guts to go in for a kiss from the pretty girl. I suppose a good lawyer could argue that our young Lothario was brainwashed by Madison Ave (or whatever it is called these days).

We have lost our common sense.

[dsc]

21. 13 is definitely not too young to learn that no means no

including kisses. That said, I can't imagine that this couldn't have been handled short of a criminal case unless this was a very forceful kiss. I could see a multi day suspension for example as being reasonable.

[BlueJazz]

23. Something needs to be done about this freak. Period.

[Jim Beard]

34. thats not enough

more!!!

[Eleanors38]

42. Yes, bring on the diarrhetic draft horse!

[yuiyoshida]

45. Isis has the ANSWER!!!

BUT hey, they are barbaric..

[Jesus Malverde]

75. Jury Results

Isis has the ANSWER!!!
http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=7164757

REASON FOR ALERT

This post is disruptive, hurtful, rude, insensitive, over-the-top, or otherwise inappropriate.

ALERTER'S COMMENTS

This is really offensively sick. A thirteen year old boy grabs a girls shirt, kisses her against her wil, open tongue and we have half the board with boys will be boys mentality. But to minimize this intrusion on the girl, to put up an ISIS beheading is disgusting.

You served on a randomly-selected Jury of DU members which reviewed this post. The review was completed at Sun Sep 13, 2015, 12:32 AM, and the Jury voted 2-5 to LEAVE IT.

Juror #1 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: No explanation given
Juror #2 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: I understand (and agree with) the alerter's disgust, but it is sarcasm. And if the fundies get their way, that's our future.
Juror #3 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: Yeah, what the alerter said.
Juror #4 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: Alerter is utterly mistaken about the point of this post. Leave it.
Juror #5 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: I'm voting to hide because using a pic of a beheading to make a joke is really offensive.
Juror #6 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: No explanation given
Juror #7 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: No explanation given

Thank you very much for participating in our Jury system, and we hope you will be able to participate again in the future.

[yuiyoshida]

85. Thank you Mr. and Ms members of the jury..

I was debating whether to put one or many...glad i went with Many ..Du IS so sensitive lately..its like walking on egg shells around here!

[Scootaloo]

77. Can't tell if serious or facetious

[BlueJazz]

84. Geez...Scootaloo...I've read perhaps a thousand of your posts. I'd know when you were being..

...facetious or not.
The kid should have a 10-15 minute talk about the subject explaining why it's not socially acceptable to force someone to have physical contact with you and...etc...etc..

[ScreamingMeemie]

24. Without knowing the entire story, it's impossible to conclude anything.

Was this girl unpopular? The fact that the kiss was made on a "dare" lends itself to both the popular girl and unpopular girl scenarios. What seems harmless might not have been. 40 years later, I still cringe when I think of all of the horrible (sometimes sexual) things said/done to our "class unpopular girl" and how no one came to her aid.

That said, it could very well be the "class popular girl," which still doesn't make it right.

As to punishment: I'm on the side of suspension. A criminal charge for being a little shit with no respect for women at 13 seems heavy (unless it truly is warranted–we don't know). I hope he learned his lesson: Hands Off unless invited.

[Android3.14]

28. That's the ticket

We won't see further information, but there certainly seems to be more here that is pertinent than the article reveals. I hope the kid learned a lesson, and I hope the authorities transform this situation, from a process to crank out yet another woman-hating ass, into a sincere learning opportunity for respect for another person's body and gender.

[daleanime]

31. Or he might have simply been sat down next to her in class....

or he might of actually liked her, etc... No way of telling from that report, but I doubt that he throw her down or anything of that nature. Something of that nature would, I hope, be included in the story.

[Jim Beard]

25. I remember several years ago when this was a very hot issue

A young but very cute preschooler whith big thick glasses kissed a girl. 5 or 6 years old. It was big news and people were not taking his side but rather saying he should not be punished but corrected.

I was absolutely floored when my nemisis at the time, the National Organization of Women was ask their opinion by a news reporter. Their reply was, "Sometimes a kiss is just a kiss". I was glad to see some common sense.

[CC]

56. Big difference between

Last edited Sun Sep 13, 2015, 12:41 PM - Edit history (1)

and 5 or 6 year old and a 13/14 year old. Also a big difference between a short close lip kiss and holding a girl by her shirt while you french kiss her.

[KitSileya]

69. And they absolutely ignored that it was recurrent,

and the girl had repeatedly said that she didn't want it to happen, the mother of the girl had to get involved, and the mother of the boy just laughed it off cause she claimed the little girl was his girlfriend. The boy was suspended, and the incident went into his file, which would not follow him past public school.

As others have stated, this is rape culture. The idea that girls should acquiesce when boys do whatever they want to them is rape culture. That girls should be flattered when they are kissed against their wish, that girls can be considered girlfriends without consent, that is rape culture as it is being taught to boys and girls everywhere.

A kiss is a kiss when both parties consent. Otherwise it is assault.

[Phantomaz]

27. No charges should be brought

He didn't force anyone.

[KitSileya]

71. He grabbed her and kissed her without getting consent.

SO I guess that either she isn't anyone or you don't consider being kissed by someone against your will an assault.

Wish I knew your real name so I can avoid being near you - you obviously have some seriously sick opinions about women and/or consent.

[MindPilot]

32. This guy would still be in prison...

?ff95ca2b4c25d2d6ff3bfb257febf11d604414e5

[Jim Beard]

33. This is the original kindergarten kissing bandit

[link:http://articles.baltimoresun.com/1996-09-27/features/1996271018_1_johnathan-prevette-kissing]

http://articles.baltimoresun.com/1996-09-27/features/1996271018_1_johnathan-prevette-kissing

1996.........

In the small town of Lexington, N.C., Johnathan Prevette, a first-grader at Southwestern Elementary, "stole" a kiss from a classmate. (We used to speak, in innocence, of "stolen" kisses. Now, we speak of "bringing charges," which, if you think about it, is hard to rhyme in a love song.)

Little Johnathan got her right on the cheek. From all reports, it was one time. No exchange of saliva. I think the official term for such a kiss is a peck.

He got her good, though.

He got her so good that the name of the "victim" is being withheld.

A teacher spotted the violation, or who knows what might have happened next. Little Johnathan and his tow-head were marched off to the principal, who did not suspend him, as reported.

What he did was send little Johnathan to the school's high-management classroom (which is where they send bad kids), made him miss an ice cream party (which, to a 6-year-old, is far worse than a 20-year stretch at San Quentin) and turned him into a national celebrity (which is way cool, dude).

Why all the fuss?

Because his crime was ... sexual harassment.

No, I'm serious.

Allow me to quote school spokeswoman Jane Martin: "A 6-year-old kissing another 6-year-old is inappropriate behavior. Unwelcome is unwelcome at any age."

A day later, they were backing off the sexual harassment charge because it sounded, well, stupid. They said little Johnathan broke a rule about "unwelcome touching," which is quite different, somehow. Or maybe not.

If you have just the slightest bit of common sense, or if you don't want to make the Rush Limbaugh show, you allow little Johnathan to plea bargain to a lesser offense, something along the lines of "snotty-nosed brat" or "acting like a 6-year-old."

You give him a time-out and tell him that kissing little girls is something that not even Bill "Sittin' in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g" Clinton did in the first grade.

No, the ever-zealous school officials had to go for the big one. If only Freud were alive today.

Katie Couric: Dr. Freud, can a 6-year-old actually sexually harass somebody?

Freud: No, but he can date his mother.

Did you get a look at this kid?

He doesn't look like a serial kisser. He looks like a cereal eater. He looks like he could play little Mikey in the Life commercial.

[AngryAmish]

35. ...

[PoutrageFatigue]

36. Completely fucking stupid...

But hey, at least the rapist-in-training will be tarnished forever....

[chillfactor]

38. how stupid!

second-degree assault charges? really? good grief? what's next? smiling at a girl will bring assault charges?

[Blue_Adept]

61. Unwanted attention

After all, she can't know what he really wants and could be wanting to assault her.

Best not to look at anyone at all.

[Jim Beard]

39. I am trying not to spam with so many articles about something so lomg ago

but it made a real impact on everyone and it was his picture that saved his "shirt". Found an article with the
"criminals" child photo. That made all the difference.

http://www.johnmonty.com/cotw/cw960928.htm

http://www.johnmonty.com/cotw/cw960928.htm

[-none]

40. I hope he doesn't graduate to robbing banks at gun point by his 7th birthday.

If and only if the girl objected, should the boy be told not to do that anymore. Some people don't appreciate being touch like that. Then drop it. He's is six years old.
The person bringing assault charges should be fired for incompetence.
This episode is just more proof of how sick and off the rails this nation has become. More PC run amuck. No wonder there are so many criminals in this country when even an innocent act by a small child can be twisted into a serious criminal act as if he were old enough to even understand.

[Eleanors38]

43. See? We're back to Gunz, again.

[treestar]

48. It would be a crime if he were an adult, so he needs to learn that now

That's what the juvenile system is for. It is not PC to protect a 14 year old girl from unpermitted touching. Imagine what it was like for her. Nobody seems to care.

[-none]

53. Look at the post I was responding to.

[treestar]

67. Oh I see.

A lot of the claims in that article are absurd though. It is not "puritanical" to at least teach the 6 year old you can't do these things. In fact a 6 year old had zippo to do with sex, so whoever wrote that is stupid. They make like it is so innocent, but the girl should not have to put up with that. It is not overly PC to teach a 6 year old you don't go and touch people in any fashion without their permission.

[Jim Beard]

50. We need to learn to be able to be "WARM" to each other without the sex.

I hug my employees and people who I have dealings with BUT the hugs are not frontal squeezes. I will put my arm around a lady and squeeze from the side. We are showing warm affection without it being sexual. I never force and I must see the other persons arms being raised also.

Learn to hug without implying sex. Like I said, never a frontal squeeze with a casual friend or acquaintance.

[RufusTFirefly]

51. Are we utterly incapable of solving problems or teaching lessons

... without getting law enforcement or the military involved?

[DetlefK]

52. How about forcing him to write an essay about "No means No" instead?

[Orrex]

59. No, because that wouldn't satisfy our cultural bloodlust

[Turbineguy]

57. Remember:

It's never too early to ruin somebody's life.

[npk]

58. While I do not agree with the arrest

13 years of age is old enough to know that touching another person without their permission in a provocative manner is wrong. I know that there are many people that see know harm to do this day in engaging in catcalling when they see a woman walk by. A great many people think that is harmless and it is not.

[Matariki]

70. The incident was misrepresented in the media - what a surprise.

From an article that gives some actual detail:

A 14-year-old girl, an eighth-grader at Pikesville Middle School, told police Wednesday that a 13-year-old boy grabbed her by her shirt, pulled her toward him and "open-mouth kissed her with his tongue," according to police.

- and yet most articles leave that info out and give the idea of an innocent peck on the cheek. In fact this photo accompanied one article:
?h=180&w=240

That looks NOTHING like this: a 13-year-old boy grabbed her by her shirt, pulled her toward him and "open-mouth kissed her with his tongue,"

If this kid was an adult walking down the street and did the same thing to a stranger he'd face an assault charge. That seems like fair criteria for involving police for teenagers in or out of school.

But, you know, boys will be boys. So lighten up.

[KitSileya]

72. Yeah, apparently if a guy is underaged, he can kiss girls without consent to his heart's content

because it is cute. Never mind the wishes and consent of the girls involved.

[Matariki]

73. If you consider grabbing someone by the front of their shirt

and jamming your tongue down their throat "a kiss" or "cute".

[KitSileya]

74. Exactly. We had this discussion on DU two years ago when a 6-year old boy was suspended

for repeatedly kissing one of his classmates. The usual brigade was in uproar because they only saw it like in your picture, completely ignoring that the boy had been suspended for the same offense previously, and for roughhousing. The mother objected because on the second suspension, the school told her that it would go into his file at school. She was encouraging him to kiss his "girlfriend".

I argued that even if it was consensual (it was not) it was problematic, as the behavior was unwanted by the teachers. He kissed her during story time, ran up to her and kissed her at random times as well. All of this is problematic not only because it was non-consensual, but because it was behavior he had been told to stop doing. He didn't, probably because his mother encouraged him, I would guess. Since the behavior was 'cute' it was permissible to too many DUers.

The 13-year old in this case should know better, and the girl has every right to expect that violations to her bodily autonomy be sanctioned. In this case, it is probably just a stupid stunt, egged on by his friends, but the assault on her is an assault regardless of the cause. At 13, you should have learned that you do not have the right to touch others without their consent. How is this different than being egged on to hit someone? Would those who consider this to be cute have any problems if this was a slap and not a kiss?

When I was her age, a classmate, his brother, and his friend held me down and felt me up, and no one did anything because I was laughing. I was laughing because they were tickling me, and I am extremely ticklish. It was an assault, and they knew what they were doing. These days I warn my friends that if they try to tickle me, I am no longer their friend. I will not be in the presence of anyone who disregards my bodily autonomy. I was not heard when I told people about the assault - they considered it cute and claimed he must have a crush on me. In other words, I was supposed to allow him to assault me because he had a crush on me. That is what we teach girls, and that is what we teach boys when we do not treat these cases seriously.

[Erich Bloodaxe BSN]

78. Key word: unwanted.

At least he's being properly charged as a juvenile, and not as an adult.

[RufusTFirefly]

79. Keep in mind: There are only two possible positions on this matter

Either you support charging the boy with second-degree assault or you condone what he did.



Reminds me of the Iraq War {sic}. Either you supported the invasion or you were clearly a fan of Saddam Hussein.

Despite what some may think, calling the cops or sending in the military isn't proof that "the system works." It's proof that the system has failed. Miserably.

[TexasMommaWithAHat]

82. Best reply.

nt

[PatrickforO]

80. I wonder where the common sense went.

[Omaha Steve]

83. I wish we had more info to make an informed opinion