Trump Depending on High Turnout of Horrible People---Borowitz on Iowa

[dixiegrrrrl]

Amid the final countdown to the Iowa caucuses, campaign staffers for Donald J. Trump said that their candidate’s chances depend on a strong turnout among horrible people. Speaking to an audience of over three thousand Horrible-Americans in Des Moines, the billionaire entreated his audience to ask their horrible friends and relatives to come to the caucuses. “I need each and every one of you atrocious people,” Trump said.

A spokesman for Sen. Ted Cruz said that, while he, too, was seeking the support of horrible people, he was also building a powerful coalition of angry loners and sociopaths.

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[Gothmog]

1. I love Andy Borowitz

[Gregorian]

2. Excellent.

So perfect. I love it.

[KamaAina]

3. And talking yams. Don't forget the talking yams.

[FSogol]

4. So perfect. K&R. n/t

[book_worm]

5. That about says it

[cascadiance]

6. Check out the end of Thom Hartmann's RT show that just aired the last few minutes...

Hartmann documents how there are many who are advocating taking down our constitutional laws to put in place religious laws, kill off gays and Jewish people, etc. and that Trump's campaign is actually welcoming some of these sort of people endorsing them.

Iowans, if you see people going to a Republican caucus to champion Trump because he stands against H-1B Visas, advise them on how this crap is NOT what we want running our country, and that Bernie is a better solution to protect your job in this regard instead, and go to the Democratic caucus instead!

[hifiguy]

7. And a corresponding horrible turnout of high people

one might infer.