Sat Feb 13, 2016, 08:05 PM
An old joke for AntoninLast edited Sat Feb 13, 2016, 09:29 PM - Edit history (1)
There's an old joke about a man who would buy a newspaper every day from a paperboy, scan the front page, and then throw the paper away in disgust. After a while, the paperboy asked him why he kept throwing the paper away. "I'm looking for someone in the obituaries," the man replied. "But, sir," said the paperboy, "the obituaries are on page 30." The man looked at him and said, "When the son of a bitch I'm looking for dies, he'll be on the front page."
... and there he is. 
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92 replies, 12760 views
 92 replies |
Author | Time | Post |
 An old joke for Antonin (Original post) |
WilliamPitt | Feb 2016 | OP |
| tandot | Feb 2016 | #1 | |
| hifiguy | Feb 2016 | #2 | |
| LiberalLoner | Feb 2016 | #3 | |
| 2naSalit | Feb 2016 | #4 | |
| leftstreet | Feb 2016 | #5 | |
| Hotler | Feb 2016 | #6 | |
| Old Codger | Feb 2016 | #7 | |
| Manifestor_of_Light | Feb 2016 | #8 | |
| A Simple Game | Feb 2016 | #11 | |
| DhhD | Feb 2016 | #40 | |
| Pakhet | Feb 2016 | #45 | |
| Punkingal | Feb 2016 | #47 | |
| mdbl | Feb 2016 | #75 | |
| Punkingal | Feb 2016 | #77 | |
| truebluegreen | Feb 2016 | #9 | |
| Bugenhagen | Feb 2016 | #25 | |
| Fast Walker 52 | Feb 2016 | #62 | |
| Gregorian | Feb 2016 | #10 | |
| Manifestor_of_Light | Feb 2016 | #12 | |
| Cleita | Feb 2016 | #16 | |
| Volaris | Feb 2016 | #24 | |
| Cleita | Feb 2016 | #28 | |
| Gary 50 | Feb 2016 | #42 | |
| abakan | Feb 2016 | #54 | |
| cannabis_flower | Feb 2016 | #34 | |
| hifiguy | Feb 2016 | #21 | |
| Manifestor_of_Light | Feb 2016 | #13 | |
| hifiguy | Feb 2016 | #22 | |
| Whatthe_Firetruck | Feb 2016 | #82 | |
| Jenny_92808 | Feb 2016 | #84 | |
| uponit7771 | Feb 2016 | #90 | |
| Liberal Jesus Freak | Feb 2016 | #14 | |
| rocktivity | Feb 2016 | #15 | |
| GoneOffShore | Feb 2016 | #87 | |
| lastlib | Feb 2016 | #17 | |
| Duppers | Feb 2016 | #27 | |
| FailureToCommunicate | Feb 2016 | #35 | |
| Paka | Feb 2016 | #18 | |
| DinahMoeHum | Feb 2016 | #19 | |
| trof | Feb 2016 | #20 | |
| Autumn Colors | Feb 2016 | #23 | |
| New Orleans Strong | Feb 2016 | #26 | |
| Duppers | Feb 2016 | #29 | |
| JonLeibowitz | Feb 2016 | #30 | |
| Skittles | Feb 2016 | #31 | |
| truebluegreen | Feb 2016 | #37 | |
| erlewyne | Feb 2016 | #32 | |
| Mbrow | Feb 2016 | #33 | |
| malthaussen | Feb 2016 | #36 | |
| wolfie001 | Feb 2016 | #38 | |
| Dem2 | Feb 2016 | #39 | |
| H2O Man | Feb 2016 | #41 | |
| dorkzilla | Feb 2016 | #43 | |
| wordpix | Feb 2016 | #44 | |
| mdbl | Feb 2016 | #76 | |
| mgmaggiemg | Feb 2016 | #46 | |
| catnhatnh | Feb 2016 | #48 | |
| chapdrum | Feb 2016 | #49 | |
| Marie Marie | Feb 2016 | #50 | |
| The Velveteen Ocelot | Feb 2016 | #51 | |
| stopwastingmymoney | Feb 2016 | #59 | |
| Bohunk68 | Feb 2016 | #61 | |
| The Velveteen Ocelot | Feb 2016 | #69 | |
| Bohunk68 | Feb 2016 | #74 | |
| tomp | Feb 2016 | #64 | |
| Jenny_92808 | Feb 2016 | #85 | |
| Dont call me Shirley | Feb 2016 | #52 | |
| rhett o rick | Feb 2016 | #70 | |
| Dont call me Shirley | Feb 2016 | #83 | |
| rhett o rick | Feb 2016 | #88 | |
| Baitball Blogger | Feb 2016 | #53 | |
| mountain grammy | Feb 2016 | #55 | |
| Betty Karlson | Feb 2016 | #56 | |
| Ilsa | Feb 2016 | #57 | |
| tomp | Feb 2016 | #63 | |
| Ilsa | Feb 2016 | #67 | |
| tomp | Feb 2016 | #68 | |
| latebloomer | Feb 2016 | #58 | |
| stonecutter357 | Feb 2016 | #60 | |
| Jester Messiah | Feb 2016 | #65 | |
| Borchkins | Feb 2016 | #66 | |
| marble falls | Feb 2016 | #71 | |
| MariaThinks | Feb 2016 | #72 | |
| Duval | Feb 2016 | #73 | |
| In_The_Wind | Feb 2016 | #78 | |
| lordsummerisle | Feb 2016 | #79 | |
| shanti | Feb 2016 | #80 | |
| Jenny_92808 | Feb 2016 | #86 | |
| Paladin | Feb 2016 | #81 | |
| countryjake | Feb 2016 | #89 | |
| Kang Colby | Feb 2016 | #91 | |
| WilliamPitt | Feb 2016 | #92 |
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 08:26 PM
LiberalLoner (8,795 posts)
3. K&R to the max!
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 08:38 PM
Hotler (9,520 posts)
6. Kick & rec.
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Thanks William.
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Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 08:46 PM
7. That was the first
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Thing that came to mind when I saw the headlines..
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Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 08:48 PM
8. When my husband came in and told me
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I said "Scalia?"
He said, "Scalia." I said, "We should be so lucky." For those of you who think I'm going to hell, please hold your fire. 
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Response to Manifestor_of_Light (Reply #8)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 08:53 PM
11. I'll take your fire from you, I just looked at the thermometer and it reads minus 20 already. n/t
Response to A Simple Game (Reply #11)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 10:07 PM
40. Where are you taking the fire at? It is in the 60s in Texas; southwest of the Polar Vortex.
Response to Manifestor_of_Light (Reply #8)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 10:33 PM
47. You aren't...there isn't a hell.
Response to Punkingal (Reply #47)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 03:06 PM
75. No but I wish there were for people like Scalia
Response to mdbl (Reply #75)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 04:13 PM
77. He thought there was one, so maybe there is for him. One can hope.
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 08:52 PM
10. Now hanging out at the Sulphur Bar with Thatcher.
Response to Gregorian (Reply #10)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 09:01 PM
16. Hopefully, they will be joined by Dick Cheney and Henry Kissinger soon. eom
Response to Cleita (Reply #16)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 09:27 PM
Volaris (9,729 posts)
24. Dick Cheneys headstone needs to be a urinal.
Response to Volaris (Reply #24)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 10:26 PM
42. If it's open to the public it will be.
Response to Volaris (Reply #24)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 12:48 AM
abakan (1,632 posts)
54. Whether it is or not.
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 08:58 PM
13. Reminds me of a certain grumpy judge who was disliked by everybody at the courthouse.
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My dad was a lawyer. He said when this guy dies, every lawyer in Houston will show up at his funeral just to make sure he's dead.
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Response to Manifestor_of_Light (Reply #13)
Mon Feb 15, 2016, 09:04 AM
uponit7771 (86,885 posts)
90. +1
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 08:58 PM
Liberal Jesus Freak (1,359 posts)
14. Ohhhhhhhh...
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 09:00 PM
rocktivity (44,288 posts)
15. Mr. Scalia's colleagues, friends and family have my most sincere condolences
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But then again, they always have.
rocktivity |
Response to rocktivity (Reply #15)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 08:52 PM
GoneOffShore (16,523 posts)
87. Stealing this.
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Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 09:06 PM
lastlib (19,977 posts)
17. Satan can now take that long-awaited vacation--his replacement has arrived.
Response to lastlib (Reply #17)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 09:46 PM
FailureToCommunicate (13,153 posts)
35. "Sarge, after I leave the Army, I don't want to stand in any more long lines"
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 09:12 PM
DinahMoeHum (20,779 posts)
19. Well, I'm not wasting a Kleenex on that guy. . .
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. . .need it for more important things - like my runny nose from a cold.
Just sayin'.  |
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 09:15 PM
trof (53,757 posts)
20. Originally about FDR.
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 09:30 PM
Duppers (24,670 posts)
29. Well played, Will.
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Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 09:33 PM
Skittles (144,785 posts)
31. dammit William, COME BACK
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 09:34 PM
32. Slow down, you're moving too fast
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 09:46 PM
36. I must say, my reaction upon seeing this news was not subtle.
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 10:29 PM
43. I betcha your Dad is waiting at St Peter's gate....
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 10:29 PM
44. Faux is now making him into St. Tony
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He'll be the "St. Ronnie" of his age to the pukes.
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Response to wordpix (Reply #44)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 03:08 PM
76. can't wait to see the street named after him
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 10:35 PM
48. "911 operator,how can I help you"
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 10:41 PM
49. Zippy the Pinhead, omniscient then as now
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"All life is a blur of Republicans and meat."
(Circa 1979, cartoonist Bill Griffith)  |
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 11:16 PM
Marie Marie (9,999 posts)
50. I haz a sad - NOT!
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 11:21 PM
The Velveteen Ocelot (101,514 posts)
51. I have never wished a man dead
Response to The Velveteen Ocelot (Reply #51)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 03:32 AM
stopwastingmymoney (1,674 posts)
59. That's the one I was trying to remember! Thanks, nt
Response to The Velveteen Ocelot (Reply #51)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 08:51 AM
61. Actually, that was Clarence Darrow.
Response to Bohunk68 (Reply #61)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 12:13 PM
The Velveteen Ocelot (101,514 posts)
69. You're right.
Response to The Velveteen Ocelot (Reply #69)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 01:14 PM
74. I double checked myself on this and it was Mark Twain. What Clarence said was:
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 11:35 PM
52. The first words out of my mouth upon hearing was "This changes everything!"
Response to rhett o rick (Reply #70)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 07:33 PM
83. Hopeful thinking, rhett. I'm still an optimist.
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sat Feb 13, 2016, 11:42 PM
Baitball Blogger (43,365 posts)
53. Tomorrow's local paper is going to be in the top ten most collected newspaper.
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 01:01 AM
mountain grammy (24,553 posts)
55. Thanks, Will
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So, since Tony and Clarence were joined at the hip, shouldn't the other be dying soon?
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Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 01:20 AM
Ilsa (59,806 posts)
57. I hope your Pops kicks his ass out of Heaven.
Response to tomp (Reply #63)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 10:24 AM
Ilsa (59,806 posts)
67. I was thinking he'd get there on a technicality. nt
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 01:29 AM
58. Ha, I was just about to post this on Facebook!
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 12:26 PM
marble falls (45,895 posts)
71. But Will, the old joke WAS Antonin! And I say that with all due solemnity.
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 04:50 PM
In_The_Wind (72,288 posts)
78. Kickin' it!
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 05:20 PM
lordsummerisle (4,563 posts)
79. K&R n/t
Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)
Sun Feb 14, 2016, 05:30 PM
shanti (21,508 posts)
80. this is just the beginning, imo
