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Wed Mar 30, 2016, 08:27 PM

This is all we need: Tebow for Congress

After a ignominiously failed professional football career, Tim Tebow is now being groomed by Faux Noose as a potential politician. And rather than suggesting that he run for a local school board or city council position (baby steps), the bubble-headed, gushing cable-TV personality suggests that he actually run for Congress.

Yeah, he is something of a local celebrity -- making the rubber chicken circuit, visiting and promising to pray for sick children, and otherwise trying to find something useful to do with his life. But suggesting that he run for a seat in Congress?!? Are you fucking kidding me?

Can't you just see him at the Capitol, with biblical links inscribed under his eyes? Making the Tebow kneel when a favorite piece of legislation passes?

Has he truly exhausted all the other options for washed-up jocks, such as teaching/coaching at the high school or even college level, adding his commentary to sports coverage on local TV/radio stations. selling insurance, real estate or used cars?

Beam me up, Scotty. There's no intelligent life on this planet!

http://www.firstcoastnews.com/sports/nfl/tebow-for-congress-he-says-hes-not-ruled-out-politics/110088847

42 replies, 3201 views

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Arrow 42 replies Author Time Post
Reply This is all we need: Tebow for Congress (Original post)
Fritz Walter Mar 2016 OP
rpannier Mar 2016 #1
awoke_in_2003 Mar 2016 #15
rpannier Mar 2016 #24
awoke_in_2003 Mar 2016 #37
JustAnotherGen Mar 2016 #2
Brother Buzz Mar 2016 #5
dhill926 Mar 2016 #3
3catwoman3 Mar 2016 #25
MadDAsHell Mar 2016 #32
Wilms Mar 2016 #4
NCjack Mar 2016 #6
Thespian2 Mar 2016 #9
aggiesal Mar 2016 #18
swilton Mar 2016 #7
SCantiGOP Mar 2016 #8
Marie Marie Mar 2016 #10
awoke_in_2003 Mar 2016 #16
nadinbrzezinski Mar 2016 #11
xocet Mar 2016 #23
JohnnyRingo Mar 2016 #12
Jack Rabbit Mar 2016 #17
JohnnyRingo Mar 2016 #39
NBachers Mar 2016 #13
SoapBox Mar 2016 #14
SheenaR Mar 2016 #19
Ilsa Mar 2016 #20
Hulk Mar 2016 #21
MadDAsHell Mar 2016 #22
fbc Mar 2016 #28
MadDAsHell Mar 2016 #33
alittlelark Mar 2016 #26
yortsed snacilbuper Mar 2016 #27
Press Virginia Mar 2016 #29
3catwoman3 Mar 2016 #30
Kaleva Mar 2016 #31
Fuddnik Mar 2016 #34
yortsed snacilbuper Mar 2016 #35
fbc Mar 2016 #36
Arugula Latte Mar 2016 #38
Scuba Mar 2016 #40
OldHippieChick Mar 2016 #41
Fritz Walter Apr 2016 #42

Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 08:31 PM

1. Another Steve Largent

Not what we need

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Response to rpannier (Reply #1)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 10:28 PM

15. Largent at least had talent

 

Tebow doesn't even have that

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Response to awoke_in_2003 (Reply #15)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:23 PM

24. Don't know about that. He has great game

Gaming the sports world for every dollar he can get
He's not the equivalent of Sarah Palin -- yet

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Response to rpannier (Reply #24)

Thu Mar 31, 2016, 01:15 AM

37. Tebow was a college talent

 

Running QBs last less time in the NFL than decent receivers

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Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 08:39 PM

2. This is the praying football player right? N/t

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Response to JustAnotherGen (Reply #2)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 09:17 PM

5. During his college football days he painted Bible verses on his eye black.

Fortunately, the NFL put the kibosh on that crap.

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Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 08:54 PM

3. this holier than thou fuckstick...

nauseates me...

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Response to dhill926 (Reply #3)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:23 PM

25. Your pithy commentary...

...is giving me a good belly laugh. I hope you feel better soon.

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Response to dhill926 (Reply #3)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:37 PM

32. If Tebow is a "fuckstick," do enlighten us with who your heroes are.

 

And what made him more of a fuckstick, his establishment of and continued heavy involvement in a charity dedicated to enriching the lives of children with special needs, or his overseas philanthropy work during college summers when his teammates were out partying?

This guy is clearly a total loser because he didn't perform well enough for your fantasy football team.

Geez, this kinda shit makes us look ignorant as hell.

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Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 09:01 PM

4. Right now I'm on my BOTH knees praying that don't happen. n/t

 

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Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 09:17 PM

6. Damn -- Why doesn't go to the CFL? Please resuscitate the NFL Europe and send him there.

Anywhere but Washington, DC. On second thought, if he became a Republican congressman, he probably would barely be the worst of the lot.

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Response to NCjack (Reply #6)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 10:00 PM

9. Please don't send him here to the CFL...

and you are correct...Texas has already given us Louie Gohmert...the dumbest politician in the world...

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Response to Thespian2 (Reply #9)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 10:58 PM

18. Duncan Hunter Jr. from San Diego was rated ...

the dumbest congressman.

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Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 09:39 PM

7. They need a head coach at the University of Oklahoma

 

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Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 09:46 PM

8. Trump's VP ??

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Response to SCantiGOP (Reply #8)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 10:09 PM

10. No, Cruz's VP. Better fit.

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Response to SCantiGOP (Reply #8)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 10:30 PM

16. Not old enough. nt

 

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Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 10:14 PM

11. Well Louie Gohmer might lose

 

so we need to replace the entertaining

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Response to nadinbrzezinski (Reply #11)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:22 PM

23. Say it isn't so...

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Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 10:18 PM

12. As long as he professes his love of Jesus....

... he's already as qualified as the best Republican Congressman.

What else would he have to do besides hold the Constitution in one hand and the Bible in the other?

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Response to JohnnyRingo (Reply #12)

Wed Mar 30, 2016, 10:34 PM

17. So, who is the best Republican Congressman?

(Multiple choice)
[ol type="A"]
  • Paul Ryan
  • Louie Gohmert
  • Marsha Blackburn
  • Trey Gowdy


  • Answer:
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    False

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    Response to Jack Rabbit (Reply #17)

    Thu Mar 31, 2016, 04:05 AM

    39. Hahaha

    Ya got me.

    Easier to ID the most amusing one. Gohmert is a YouTube star.

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    Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

    Wed Mar 30, 2016, 10:27 PM

    13. Isn't there some tire store franchise available somewhere?

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    Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

    Wed Mar 30, 2016, 10:28 PM

    14. Ugh....the Tbone...

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    Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

    Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:05 PM

    19. Known fact in the gossip world

    His people paid Miss America to date him. She wasn't playing by the rules so they slut-shamed her and said she was pressuring him too much for sex (he is an alleged virgin) and she got the ax.

    This guy would fit right in with the Cruz faction

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    Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

    Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:06 PM

    20. I think he'd behave better than most Republicans in Congress.

    Therefore, I doubt they'll let him win, at least not until he gets a wife.

    Besides, I'd rather he stay with ESPN. I enjoyed his football commentary.

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    Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

    Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:10 PM

    21. Not at all surprised

    The guy is a tool. A stooge for the bible-thumping religious reich. A boyish grin, am empty head, and an instant fan club to adore his religion on his sleeve for the rest of us to suffer through.

    This is the same insane crowd that brought us white trash sarah.

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    Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

    Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:10 PM

    22. Yeah, guy's a real asshole and wouldn't know a thing about serving people.

     

    https://www.timtebowfoundation.org/index.php/stand-with-night-to-shine/

    http://mweb.cbssports.com/ncaaf/eye-on-college-football/25485575/tim-tebow-hosts-200-proms-for-32000-people-with-special-needs

    "Tebow envisioned a foundation to give back to others during his college career, and he, along with other University of Florida students, created "First and 15", raising funds for Uncle Dick's Orphanage[173] [clarification needed] in the Philippines, founded by his father's nonprofit association, the Bob Tebow Evangelistic Association.[174] He also raised money for Shands Hospital pediatric cancer center in Gainesville and a Disney trip for disadvantaged children. Upon graduation from University of Florida, Tebow launched the Tim Tebow Foundation in January 2010."

    "CURE and the Tebow Foundation announced plans to build a children's hospital in the fall of 2011 in the Philippines, the country where Tebow was born. The Tebow CURE Hospital in Davao City, on the island of Mindanao, will hold 30 beds and will specialize in orthopedics. CURE's 12th hospital worldwide, they hope to heal deformities such as clubfoot, untreated burns, hydrocephalus and other conditions correctable with surgery. The cost of the project, $3 million, will come from donations from CURE and the Tebow Foundation. The hospital will include a "Timmy's Playroom"."


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    Response to MadDAsHell (Reply #22)

    Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:31 PM

    28. He's also working as an analyst for the SEC Network

     

    That may not be as noteworthy as the things you mentioned, but it's not like he's doing nothing.

    Tebow was not good enough to be an NFL quarterback which puts him with around 99.9% of the world's population. It's not his fault that so many of his fans couldn't accept this. By all accounts he is a good person and he doesn't really deserve the hatred that gets directed towards him.

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    Response to fbc (Reply #28)

    Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:38 PM

    33. It's DU; if you're even SUSPECTED of supporting the wrong party, you're Satan incarnate. nt

     

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    Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

    Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:25 PM

    26. Idiocracy is a documentary from the future....

    ...sent to warn us.

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    Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

    Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:30 PM

    27. Tebow wouldn't make a pimple on an Athiest's a$$!

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    Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

    Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:31 PM

    29. He actually walks the walk

     

    Unlike most Christians he actually does things to help people.
    In college he was working in clinics in the Philippines and Africa. His foundation works with orphans and sick kids.

    And, unlike another well known foundation, run by a former president, 100% of the charitable donations go to the various causes. OH costs are covered by gifts, specifically given for these costs.

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    Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

    Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:32 PM

    30. I'm going to take a wild-assed guess...

    ...that he never painted this verse from Matthew under his eyes:

    5 ďAnd when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. 6 But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

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    Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

    Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:36 PM

    31. If he runs in a conservative district, he'll probably easily win.

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    Response to Kaleva (Reply #31)

    Wed Mar 30, 2016, 11:56 PM

    34. His family is from Floriduh.

    We'll be stuck with him.

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    Response to Fuddnik (Reply #34)

    Thu Mar 31, 2016, 12:11 AM

    35. As long as you submit, you should be okay?

    sub∑mit.

    VERB

    1.accept or yield to a superior force or to the authority or will of another person:

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    Response to Fuddnik (Reply #34)

    Thu Mar 31, 2016, 12:16 AM

    36. Well then at least he'll have DWS support for his republican candidacy.

     

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    Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

    Thu Mar 31, 2016, 01:31 AM

    38. Maybe he should ask his god if he should run. You know, the same god that was so busy

     

    deciding football game outcomes it didn't have time to help starving babies or avert massive earthquakes or stop fatal diseases.

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    Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

    Thu Mar 31, 2016, 10:41 AM

    40. If elected to Congress, Tim would pray for his constituents.

     

    It's the least he can do.

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    Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

    Thu Mar 31, 2016, 10:47 AM

    41. I agree that he might make a halfway decent high school coach. But

    he was told all growing up that he was going to become a pro football player and he was wildly popular in Florida. He had spent those millions before he was ever drafted. Now, to be a virtual nobody is not sitting well, not to mention the pedestrian salary he would get as a high school coach. At least Congress gets paid 6 figures and that's closer to his ballpark.

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    Response to Fritz Walter (Original post)

    Fri Apr 15, 2016, 03:53 PM

    42. This just in: "Red Alert" is pushing him to take Ander Crenshaw's seat

    http://www.news4jax.com/news/could-tim-tebow-run-for-congress

    When Crenshaw announced his retirement, the local Democratic Party leaders said they're not even going to try to name a candidate for the general election in November, because the District is so "Gerrymandered."

    Thanks for throwing in the towel before the fight even begins, Debbie Wasserman Schultz.

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