Are Mason Jars Sexist?

[Albertoo]

Mason Jars were made by men for men. Isn't it about time we had a jar for women?

I was standing around in my kitchen the other day when I got the idea to make a candle holder out of a mason jar, and then to sell it on Etsy. My mom always told me I had a knack for creating things, so I figured why not? I'm sure no one has done it before.

I had some jars I could empty from when my husband and I jarred preserves last summer, only when I tried to open the jar, I couldn't. I used a towel, banged on the sides with a butter knife, but nothing could make it budge. Finally, I begrudgingly asked my husband for help and he opened it with no trouble. He's 6'3, so it wasn't an issue for his larger hands. Then I realized something: the problem wasn't me, it was the jar. More specifically, the man who invented it. A white man. Who was straight. And privileged.

Why should I have big hands to open a jar? Jars should come in many sizes so people of all strength profiles can open them. Making me rely on a man for ANYTHING is sexist. Really? REALLY???

I looked into it and found out that I'm not the only one having this problem. It's 2016. Isn't it about time we had a jar that reflected the year? Mason jars are even named after a straight man. Because of course it was. Women never get a fair shake in society.

Anyway, I hope someone invents this. It's a good idea. I just hope someone, anyone makes this thing a reality. Anyway, I'm off to make a candle now.

[rug]

1. If it's any consolation, Donald Trump can't open a Mason jar either.

[Albertoo]

3. Poor dear. Why?

[rug]

4. Little hands.

[Albertoo]

5. That's not what he told his friend Marco

[panader0]

36. Yeah but he has prehensile_____and opposable_____!

[Laura PourMeADrink]

27. DUzy !!! very funny rug ! nt

[Fast Walker 52]

41. LOL!

[Hortensis]

61. Lol. Or get the last olives out.

[LiberalArkie]

2. Yes,, They would be Eastern Star jars.

[jberryhill]

12. I knew it was a conspiracy

[Laffy Kat]

53. ....

That was funny.

[Marrah_G]

59. LMAO

[Odin2005]

60. Bwahahaha!

[LiberalElite]

6. There are lots of jar opener thingys now so I wouldn't be making an issue of it -

https://www.google.com/search?q=jar+openers&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjgwobwtfHLAhUBWRoKHTEnDGAQsAQIXQ&biw=1600&bih=763

[Albertoo]

7. Yes, I have one. But it's the principle involved.

[LiberalElite]

8. Really. I'm moving on to another principle nt

[Brickbat]

9. Oh, shut up.

[Texasgal]

10. Are you serious?

No...wait.. This has to be satire.

Sorry..

[Oneironaut]

13. Seems tongue-in-cheek

[oldandhappy]

11. interesting point

Jars are made in factories so I suppose they come in set sizes. I have never bought mason jars. I have trouble opening some plastic bottle top on juice bottles, some glass jars in several sizes -- not just mason jars. I have my grandmother's squeeze opener.

[Retrograde]

14. Being serious for a few minutes...

I can, using genuine mason jars (now made by the Ball Company) with 2 piece lids. While I often have problems opening commercially sealed jars, I have no problems with anything I can myself. The seal is created by the rubber part of the lid welding itself to the glass, and the ring is just there to hold it in place while the jars are being processed. When I want to use something I canned, I unscrew the ring (since I screwed it on in the first place that's not a problem) and use an ordinary churchkey-style can opener to lift the lid.

You don't want commercially sealed jars to be all that easy to open: they're sealed so the stuff inside doesn't pick up pathogens or other microbes floating around in the environment. I usually end up resorting to the tall husband method, but I soften them up first. If the lid is metal, holding it under HOT water can help, as it expands the metal a tad. Pliers or a large wrench also work. Hitting the bottle with a hammer is not advised.

[TexasBushwhacker]

18. So does wrapping the lid with a rubber band

It's all about getting a good grip.

Anyway, I think canning jars are designed with wide mouths to make them easier to fill. The little 6 oz jars are for jelly.

[smirkymonkey]

30. Hey, I thought I was the one who invented that trick!

It works well though, doesn't it?

[Takket]

15. April fools was yesterday

[WillowTree]

16. There are both wide-mouth and narrow-mouth Mason jars.

Find some of the ones with the smaller lids and you'll be all set.

That said, I use Mason jars for storing many things from coffee to soup pasta to brown sugar and use mostly the wide-mouth variety because it's generally easier to fill and empty them. I have pretty small hands and have never had much hand strength, yet I rarely have any difficulty opening one.

[The Straight Story]

17. Yes, they are sexist

I once knew one that held a door open for someone

[GreatCaesarsGhost]

43. Was the door ajar?

[Egnever]

47. .

[The Straight Story]

49. Well played :) (nt)

[tblue37]

67. That's adorable. nt

[kentauros]

19. So, buy a set at the grocery store and make a bunch of these:

Quick, easy, temporary, and beautiful LED garden lights

Somewhere in the comments are tips on making them solar-powered with rechargable batteries and a photocell (or that may be on another part of the same site.) Either way, once made, no need to open them again!

[linuxman]

20. That's why I keep my privilege in them.

So weak women will neve have a chance. Small handed girly men too.

[So Far From Heaven]

21. I know I'm gonna pay for this BUT

consider what they do.

I'm pretty sure that the originators of self sealing jars were NOT gender sensitive. If I remember correctly, you weren't allowed to own property much less vote when these thingies were first made.

However, I'm also pretty sure they didn't have a whole lot of technology back then to address the problem even if they were gender cognizant.

I claim they are asexual, having proven to be a total pain in the ass to everyone.

[blogslut]

22. grip/rubber gloves

problem solved

also, a good smack on the bottom of the jar

[milestogo]

23. The Mason Jars were obviously designed to deny women access

to a secret potion which gives white males privilege. Once the jars can be opened by women, there is going to be a revolution...



Edit: Just hold the jar lid under hot water so it expands.

[romanic]

24. You should write for The Onion.

[muriel_volestrangler]

25. Could be worse - the British equivalent is the Kilner jar, and the great-great-great grandson

of the inventor is ... Jeremy Clarkson!

Now that's what I call sexist ...

[leftyladyfrommo]

26. Mason jars are very "in" right now.

They are for sale in all the craft stores. They are regular or painted, normal size or really small. All kinds of special lids so that they can be made into little lites.

Pretty amazing marketing really. Now that people don't can very much any more

One woman on Etsy sells them with solar lights and they are really cool.

Men weren't nearly so creative. They just used them to put nails and screws in.

[kentauros]

28. That's why I like sites such as Evil Mad Scientist

A Simple and Cheap Dark-Detecting LED Circuit

Quick, easy, temporary, and beautiful LED garden lights

[leftyladyfrommo]

37. Or you can buy them already made

at Joanns. Which is what I have to do since I am a techno idiot.

One woman made these beautiful solar jars that just shimmer in iridescent colors like a jar full of fireflies. She sells them for $16 on Etsy.

Beautiful out on patios at night.

[kentauros]

44. Don't be ironically contradicting

A woman made those lights so that the lights don't have to be re-opened because they're so difficult to open in the first place

If she can do it, you can too

(the instructions on that site are quite simple and take one step-by-step)
We should have a contest

[A HERETIC I AM]

29. The subjects DU'ers will complain about never ceases to amaze me

Just let your husband open the damned jars, for fucks sake.

It shows him you still need him for something other than lawn maintenance.

Of all the things to complain about.


Jesus H. Christ canning rutabagas while juggling flaming kittens

[onyourleft]

32. Men do...

...lawn maintenance?

[AngryAmish]

31. It's 2016.

[underpants]

33. It's a Masonic conspiracy I tell ya

[Travis_0004]

34. What the hell were they thinking???

Making a lid large enough so large objects can pass through it.

[Orrex]

35. And don't get me started on bell jars

[ryan_cats]

45. Not

Not a fan of Sylvia Plath?

[ryan_cats]

38. Isn't

Isn't that from Maddox's April fool page?

[Albertoo]

62. Bingo

[csziggy]

39. You may be onto something here - Ball makes a line of jars, too!

You can see a picture of the Ball Brothers here: http://www.ball.com/history/ They are ALL men!

And the book they sell to teach how to can is "Ball Blue Book Guide to Preserving!" (I think they messed up the name and it was supposed to be the "Blue Ball Book Guide to Preserving.&quot

[lame54]

40. Great - now you are trying to make us irrelevant altogether...

At least there are still spiders to kill

[noamnety]

42. That's why we have breasts.

Somewhere along my career, I attended a job-sponsored health awareness day and they gave out breast exam awareness jar openers. Kinda like these:



but with a more breast-centric slogan. I figure it gives me the advantage now, because my husband feels weird grabbing that and squishing it.

[seaglass]

68. Did you know the alt name for those openers are rubber husbands? I have a jar opener that has

never failed me, is much better than the rubber openers and it's only 4.99.

http://www.containerstore.com/s/need-it/kitchen/jarkey/12d?productId=10000651&ci_src={ifpla:17588969}{ifpe:27500988}&ci_sku=10014761&srccode=cii_17588969&cpncode=44-163155048-2&utm_source=channelintelligence&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=google

[TacoD]

46. On a similar note, is Jason Mraz sexist? (nt)

[Enrique]

64. hahahaha

it took me a while but I got it.

[Dr. Strange]

48. Yes, obviously. Someone needs to make Madaughter Jars for women.

[Initech]

50. I counter that with - are those mason jars full of beer?

[whistler162]

51. You could buy Kilner jars

but then they might get angry at you if you don't fill them and try to hit you. Just like the inventors great(x3)-grandson Jeremy Clarkson.

[braddy]

52. It isn't just the jars, ever wonder who designed that top shelf in the kitchen? Men.

[Laffy Kat]

54. This. Drives me crazy.

I can only reach the first two shelves on my cabinets, beyond that I need a step-ladder. I'm 5'3", not terrible petite for a woman. On the other hand, at least I can't see the dust on top of the fridge.

[REP]

55. If you really canned, you'd call it canning and you'd have a jar wrench.

[Warpy]

56. How silly. I have rheumatoid arthritis and live alone and have had little trouble with them

Once in a while, one of them was gorilla fisted after canning and gives me an argument. A quick dip in hot water (usually the pasta water for the sauce in the jar) will expand the metal just enough to break it free of the little piece of gunk welding it to the jar threads. A towel makes the ring feel softer to painful hands.

Liquids with tight lids are even easier, just a couple of quick smacks on the bottom of the bottle break the seal at the top.

Once in a blue moon a jar will give me enough of an argument to pull out my old church key, hook it under the rim and pull gently to break any seal. I keep the church key also in case I need to shuck any oysters, nothing's better.

I have never gone in search of a male neighbor to open a stubborn jar. I can always get the bastards open, gimpy hands and all.

(for the young, church key = old style beer can opener for those days before pop tops or ring openers)

[Liberal_in_LA]

57. Run hot water on the lid first

[madamesilverspurs]

58. Makes me wonder

who invented the lid on my bottle of prune juice. Try as I might, I could not get it open. My neighbor tried, with no success. I took it back to the grocery store's customer service desk, where I explained my plight to the assistant manager who gave me one of those indulgent yet patronizing smiles. After he turned dark red with his own failed effort to open the thing, he walked away and came back with another bottle. He asked if I wanted to try opening it, which I did (successfully). The bottle I couldn't open was the store brand; the one I was able to open was the more expensive one, much to the assistant manager's frustration. He did agree that the stubborn lid was a mean trick on seniors. But I got my juice.

[Enrique]

63. has anyone here tried open a jar of Mole?

here's how to do it:

[kwassa]

65. well, the Masonic Order doesn't admit women, so it is indeed sexist.

[panader0]

66. Look-- guys need their,uh, egos stroked.

So let hubby open the jar a give him a reason feel like a real man.
Jeannie does this with me regularly, and I have better self-esteem
because of it.
Did I mention I can palm a basketball?