Ten Things White People Need To Quit Saying

[KamaAina]

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/melody-moezzi/ten-things-white-people-n_b_9765436.html

While I’ve never been especially fond of political correctness for its own sake, I’ve encountered enough well-meaning white people embarrassing themselves to know that a brief tutorial can’t hurt. For those who insist that they could never say anything racist because they are not racists, I present a quick reminder: Just because you didn’t intend for something to sound racist, doesn’t mean it isn’t, and just because you don’t think you’re a racist, doesn’t mean you’re not. I refer you to the Washington Redskins and every idiot who insists that Native Americans should be “honored” to be so warmly insulted. Newsflash: Determining whether this team’s name is racist is not up to anyone but Native Americans. If you are not Native American, your opinion on the issue is at best irrelevant. I know it’s hard for some to accept, but white people don’t get to determine what is and isn’t racist.

As an American who reflects an increasingly common and decidedly ambiguous shade of brown, I have been questioned and “complimented” in some of the strangest ways—rarely by people intending to sound racist, but often by people who end up sounding super racist. So I present the following list as a sort of public service. While it is far from exhaustive, it represents a fair sampling of the kinds of comments that often make those of us with more melanin cringe—or just never contact you after you give us your business cards. So here goes, in no particular order:

Do not use the word “exotic” to refer to humans who do not look like you. We are not fruit, and it is not a compliment. The longer you insist on assuring us that it is a compliment, the stupider you look. Just give it up....

Think before asking people to explain an entire race, religion, civilization or geographic region to you simply because they happen to identify with that background. Don’t expect a 14-year-old girl who covers her hair to explain all of Islam to you in ten minutes or less simply because you’re too lazy to read a book. Get a library card and let her eat her lunch in peace.

[metroins]

1. How about

Nobody tells an entire race things they can or cannot say in a free country.

If the author wishes to express her dislike for certain words that's fine, but this entire article is offensive and in my opinion racist.

And yes, I read her last paragraph. She comes off as a racist.

[Nuclear Unicorn]

18. She can't be racist; she has white friends.

[metroins]

20. I don't have any white friends.

But that might be because I don't have any friends.

[scscholar]

27. The smartest people almost always have no friends

It's because we're no fun. People prefer fun and stupid to smart and not fun.

[TipTok]

2. What a delicate little flower...

... With a hearty helping of victim mentality.

[LanternWaste]

3. I'd rationalize her concerns as such too were I intolerant and less educated.

I'd rationalize her concerns as such too were I intolerant and less educated.

[TipTok]

6. Are you sure those are the words you want to go with?

Give it a check and I'll look in on you later...

Good luck...

[clarice]

11. Be careful Tip....some people are very quick on the alert button....they LIVE for it.nt

[TipTok]

14. It's all some folks have...

The idea that other people might have different ideas just cannot be tolerated.

[clarice]

16. And yet...aren't tolerance and open mindedness hallmarks of TRUE Liberalism?nt

[TipTok]

28. You can choose to believe and espouse whatever you want...

... as long as you choose from this pre-approved list.

[linuxman]

23. Relax. It's his standard Cntrl+c-Cntrl+V "harumph!" he's (she's?) been using lately.

[Bonx]

9. What if you just had a different opinion ?

What if you just had a different opinion ?

[clarice]

12. Not allowed.nt

[Kalidurga]

4. I don't disagree with a single thing on that list

[snooper2]

5. I'll quit saying exotic if you quit calling me white LOL

I'm fucking beige, almost brown!

[phylny]

13. I love love love this.

I'm a speech-language pathologist, and work with children. One of my very favorites is a young, African-American boy I've been seeing for a while.

A few years ago when he was six, during Black History Month, he came into my room and said, "Now, I do like you, and you are white and I am black."

I smiled because I like him too. Knowing anyway, I asked what he was learning in school, and we talked about about Dr. King, and after thinking a moment, he said, "But really, I'm brown and you're beige. Right?"

Right.

I'm Italian from Sicily, Sorrento, and Naples, third generation born in the U.S. Unlike most of my family, I am blue-eyed and had blond hair as a little girl, brown as I grew older. It's mostly grey now. The rest of my family has dark skin and curly, if not kinky hair. Yeah, I'm pretty much beige, with a dash of tan in the summer

I, too, am not a fan of people who tell me what to say and think and do. I'm not an idiot.

[MADem]

7. LOL--I totally get what she is saying.

However, if you're more than one flavor, and don't feel like explaining to people what percentage of this/that/the other you are, that "ethnic" word comes in handy and shuts people up. "I'm.....ETHNIC" is a great way to cut off conversations with people who might think "ethnic" is an actual race of people~!!

[Albertoo]

8. #2 and #6 are weird

#2: what's wrong with the word ethnic?
#6: racists come in all skin colors.

[romanic]

10. Articles like these...

just embolden more people (aka. working class whites - you know the one everyone wonders why they don't vote Democrat) to support trash like Trump.

Admittedly, as someone whose biracial, I've dealt with a couple of those points on that list myself. However I'm smart enough to know not every single white person I come across is going to be a racist ignorant asshat. The author should adopt the same mindset and stop writing condescending race-bait articles those on the right can cite as evidence of "white genocide" or whatever the hell.

[Prism]

15. There is reverse racism

Good list, except for that one.

That recent story about the Rhode scholar who gloated because he made a poor white waitress cry?

That guy is a racist.

Living in the Bay Area, with a lot of diverse populations, the amount of racism that comes out of nonwhite populations is dizzying.

Of course, the white people are racist, too.

Sometimes I wish we'd just replace the word racism with "tribalism" because that's really what it comes down to. Every group of humans on the planet can take tribalism to a shitty place - and they often do.

[TipTok]

29. It's just regular ol' racism...

[clarice]

38. How fucking right on is THAT !!!! Well done.nt

[Skittles]

40. the idea that racism is only based on power is absolutely ridiculous

[Odin2005]

17. "Exotic" is a relative, not absolute term.

A Japanese-American IS "exotic" for people in North Dakota, not so much in California. "exotic" simply means something outside of a person's everyday experience.

IMO the real issue is with the creepy eroticizing of "exotic" women, because it is based on notions that non-Western women are submissive and "know their place".

[Iggo]

19. You don't have to be Native American to see that "Redskins" is a racial slur.

You just need a functioning brain.

[ieoeja]

35. The problem is that bigotry against Native Americans east of the Mississippi barely exists.

I have spent my entire life living in the eastern half of the country, and I have yet to encounter it. I have never met an easterner whose Euro-American history is more than a couple hundred years long who did not have some Native-American ancestry as well. And we brag about it.

It would never occur to us that some people might look down upon us for that ancestry.

That said, I'm sure you could find examples in the eastern half: professional fishermen upset by favorable fishing rights granted to Native Americans, for instance. But it is so rare that I have never encountered it.


First time I was out west on business travel, I was dumbstruck by the bigotry I heard against Native Americans. I honestly did not know that such a thing existed. I thought that had died out decades ago.

A full blooded (or at least mostly so) Cherokee gal I knew in Chicago went out west to visit relatives for the first time. She showed up at my house that next Sunday morning in tears. She had never experienced racism directed at her before.

So you have an entire half of the United States geographically, with the majority of the United States population, that has no experience with bigotry aimed at Native Americans. Northerners see enough racism directed at African-Americans to feel it. That problem resonates with us. Easterners don't feel it about Native Americans. It does not seem real to us.

Well, it does to me because of my trips out west. But if not for that experience, I would probably believe it was all just "blaming American today for evils a century in the past".


That is presumably how most Americans think about the notion of "Redskins" as a racial slur. They probably believe the people claiming that are just blaming Americans today for evils a century in the past.

[Throd]

21. Spending time with the author would make for a very long day.

[GulfCoast66]

22. LOL at the sanctimonious last paragraph.

I agree with some of the points and think others are completely off base. But why in the world would I feel offended?

And the whole 'feel it comment'? In the real world WTF does it even mean?

[Quantess]

24. What a whiner.

[linuxman]

25. More tedious, puritanical language-policing.

They few good points got covered in bullshit. I don't have time to clean.

[sufrommich]

26. "Remember that reverse racism isn’t a thing."

Wise words.

[Igel]

31. When you apply for a job, why not?

I submitted an application. The receptionist asked me several times if I wanted to apply.

It was a good fit, and the job was 1 1/2 blocks from where I lived. I had the form filled out, so I said sure.

As I left, I noticed what she meant. I hadn't noticed it before. She was black, the managers behind their glass walls were black, and all the employees were black. I was the white guy in the room.

I doubt that this was just a random statistical anomaly, in a part of town that was over half white and 10% Asian. I also suspect that the door hadn't closed before my resume and application were in the trash can. Or the subject of hilarity. And nobody would ever say that the management were selecting people and excluding others based on racist thinking.

"Reverse racism isn't a thing" requires a very narrow, very specific, very self-serving definition which means that if you benefit, you're racist even if you do nothing but follow the process, but if you kick somebody and abuse them because of their race you may not be. It allows hatred and race-based contempt and stereotyping based on skin color and gives a pass because of skin color. It's a clever attempt at manipulating (a) the weak minded and (b) those who love their confirmation bias to (c) make a political point using inflammatory language none dare dispute without a potential negative consequence.

[Major Nikon]

39. There is no "reverse racism"

Discrimination based on race is racism. It doesn't matter which direction it goes.

[redwitch]

30. "We are not fruit".

LOL! I think you are a peach. XO

[hfojvt]

32. what an exotic list

I wonder where she's from

[KamaAina]

33. Where is she really from?

[Tommy_Carcetti]

34. I think reverse racism is very real. Reverse discrimination, on the other hand, isn't.

Discrimination implies the majority group entrenched in power can impose either the law or social structures in their favor and against the interests of the minority. That really can only flow one way, against the minority.

But anyone of any race or ethnic group can be racist or bigoted.

[pokerfan]

36. "What kind of Asian are you?"

[ieoeja]

37. 12 Replies

1.Do not use the word “exotic” to refer to humans who do not look like you. We are not fruit, and it is not a compliment. The longer you insist on assuring us that it is a compliment, the stupider you look. Just give it up.

I always thought that was a stupid thing to say to a person.

1.Do not use the word “ethnic” as though it were a distinct race or nationality.

There are no ethnic Poles? I beg to differ.

1.Do not ask people where they are from more than once. Trust them the first time. No need for “Where are you really from?” or “Where are your parents from?”

I did not like that when I first got to Chicago. But I finally realized there isn't anything wrong with asking someone about their ancestry. It's just conversation.

1.Avoid statements like, “Wouldn’t it be great to live during [insert any era during which the person you’re talking to couldn’t vote or own property]?”

I always thought that was pretty stupid too.

1.Resist the urge to ever say, “I have a lot of [fill in the blank with the racial, religious or ethnic group with which you are least familiar] friends.”

So I am supposed to keep my {insert the blank} friends a secret like I'm embarassed of them or something? "Okay, gay friends, get your asses back in the closet pronto!"

WTF?

1.Remember that reverse racism isn’t a thing. Racism is about the abuse of power and privilege. If your race denies you power and privilege, then you can’t be racist. Certainly, you can still be an asshole. Just not a racist.

I already knew this.

1.Unless you are one of “those people” making fun of other people calling you “those people,” then never say “those people.”

You are telling me that I am not allowed to make fun of bigots talking about "those people" because I am not one of those people. Are you fucking kidding me? Remember the move exchange:

White actor: something, something, something "those people".

White actor playing a Black character: "what do you mean 'those people'?"

Black actor to #2 above: "what do you mean 'those people'?"

That was the only funny part about that movie. And that part was fucking hillarious.

1.Think before asking people to explain an entire race, religion, civilization or geographic region to you simply because they happen to identify with that background. Don’t expect a 14-year-old girl who covers her hair to explain all of Islam to you in ten minutes or less simply because you’re too lazy to read a book. Get a library card and let her eat her lunch in peace.

I usually step in when I encounter that one. "Do you know everyone in Chicago, because you do realize there are many millions more people in Egypt than in Chicago."

1.Remember, we are not all from any one place. Pretending we are just makes you look delusional. So avoid the “We’re all from Africa anyway” statements.

Given that I never have....

2.Unless you have achromatopsia, never say “I don’t see color.”

Given that I never have.... However, I do love how comfortable young, urban kids are talking race nowadays in mixed race groups. They seem mostly amused by racists. Of course, I remember when we thought it was going to die out with all the people older than us only to discover there were more in our age group that we realized. But one still has hope.