Dear creepy heterosexual men guarding our bathrooms,

[ehrnst]

"My entire life, I've been told to fear you in one way or another. I've been told to cover my body as to not distract you in school, to cover my body to help avoid unwanted advances or comments, to cover my body as to not tempt you to sexually assault me, to reject your unwanted advances politely as to not anger you. I've been taught to never walk alone at night, to hold my keys in my fist while walking in parking lots, to check the backseat of my car, to not drink too much because you might take advantage of me. I've been told what I should and shouldn't do with my body as to not jeopardize my relationships with you.

I've been warned not to emasculate you, to let "boys be boys", to protect your fragile ego and to not tread on your even more fragile masculinity. I've been taught to keep my emotions in check, to let you be the unit of measure for how much emotion is appropriate and to adjust my emotions accordingly. I've been taught that you're allowed to categorize women into mothers/sisters/girlfriends/wives/daughters but any woman outside of your protected categories is fair game.

So to those of you who think you're being helpful by "protecting" me and my fellow women, you're like a shark sitting in the Lifeguard chair. I wasn't uncomfortable until you showed up at the pool and the only potential predator I see is you.

Your mothers, sisters, girlfriends, wives and daughters don't need you to walk them to the bathroom for safety. Your fathers, brothers, friends and sons need to walk themselves away from their own double standards. Women are sexually harassed and sexually assaulted on school campuses, on the street, at their jobs, on the Internet, in their own homes, in ANY public place. And it has been excused or ignored for so long because of what you and I are taught from the first years of our interactions with each other: You, as a male, are not accountable for your own actions. It's MY responsibility, as a female, to not "provoke" you. But then you get to Knight-In-Shining-Armor your way through life for those in your protected categories and I am expected to applaud you. Why the outrage now over bathrooms? Why aren't you outraged every single day?"[/div ]

more: http://www.dailykos.com/story/2016/5/19/1528469/-Dear-creepy-heterosexual-men-guarding-our-bathrooms

[Chemisse]

1. "Why aren't you outraged every single day?"

This is spot on.

[smirkymonkey]

20. This - exactly!!

[baldguy]

2. To my knowledge, hormone supplements don't make your pee radioactive.

And I'd be much more disturbed by some holy-roller bible thumper wanting to check the type of equipment I'm equipped with in that private moment, than a fellow patron using the facilities for their intended purpose.

[Saviolo]

3. "Our women will be sexually assaulted in washrooms!"

That is their strident belief, that somehow the fact that trans women were born as men will make them want to assault, stare at, peep on, etc... women in the washroom instead of, y'know, just wanting to go to the washroom.

They're ABSOLUTELY OUTRAGED that this might be the case.

But here's the thing. Look at how men treat women who actually come forward after sexual assault and rape. That they would DARE accuse a man of advancing without consent. There have been two highly publicized cases in the last couple of years; Bill Cosby and (in Canada) Jian Ghomeshi. In both cases the women who had been assaulted, and even in some cases drugged and assaulted, were dragged through the mud on social media with rape and death threats, and even the media decided they needed to take a look at the "motivations" of these women for stepping forward.

Deal with that problem before you deal with the non-problem of trans people using the washroom of the sex they identify as. Women are not "going to be" assaulted. They are BEING assaulted. Every day. And they largely don't even report it, because victims of rape and assault are treated terribly by men and the media.

[mcar]

4. So well said!

[annabanana]

5. every woman knows this..

Why is it so hard to get it through to the guys?

[awoke_in_2003]

13. Because we are either a bit stupid...

or so used to privilege that we do not see it or refuse to see it.

[Mira]

6. Legislating issues they don't understand

for all the wrong reasons

[Moostache]

14. Their response would be that these aren't "REAL" transexuals...

They are, as always, wrong.

Wrong about the solution with no problem...same as voter fraud.
Shameless about the duplicity and REAL aim of the actions...for voter fraud its pure racism and for this its purely an avenue to exert control over women in an indirect manner even more than usual.

Until humanity and society decide that equality does not mean Men are more equal than Women, we will live under idiotic ideas and fake controversies like these.

I would love for a "X-tian" bathroom monitor to challenge ANY of these pictured individuals to a "genital display for entry please" test...

[Mira]

15. The other side of the coin --- and this is a photo of a real friend of mine

He/she it transgender as well. I think in my restroom she would do fine, but in a male restroom he may be in danger.

I underline all you have said of course, and shudder at the problems this (unenforceable) law would create.

[moriah]

18. No offense, but if this is your friend, could you use her preferred pronouns?

"He/she" and the later reference to "him" in a guy's bathroom seems a little insensitive, and I do hope you make an effort to do so around them.

Unless they consider themselves gender fluid/third gender, but if she is actually transgender and has sought at least top surgery for female outward sexual characteristics, I'd give them the benefit of the doubt and use "she".

[CrispyQ]

7. Excellent commentary.

Thanks for posting.

[Silver_Witch]

8. Oh Goddess what an excellent post!

This is the truth. Clear simple and perfect. Men want to rule our body but don't have to control theirs. You may have just won the prize for best post EVER!

[lark]

9. Exactly right

Thank you for this epic and true rant. Every woman lives this. Transgender men don't rape women, the ones guarding the bathroom are much scarier and much more likely to hurt us.

[narnian60]

10. +1000

Perfectly said.

[DI Freighter Watcher]

11. Trained to be hyper-vigilant

Rapists are everywhere and we must not provoke them, else we get what we deserved.
I dream of a time when rapists are eliminated swiftly and women walk without fear, wearing what ever she Damm well pleases!

[allan01]

12. i love it when these people shove their morality down our throats

as for the pic that poster number 6 shared are u hall monitors going to argue with them. hem .. with certain states inacting model legislation sounds like a.l.e.c is running overtime and its time to shut them down for trying to enact laws and policies .

[AwakeAtLast]

16. I want to Rec this 1000 times

Outstanding post!

[ehrnst]

17. This part NAILS what the bathroom monitor brigade is really about:

"If you're telling me that there are high volumes of boys and men out there, in schools or in general, who are just waiting for a "loop hole" to sexually assault girls and women, we have bigger problems on our hands than bathrooms."

[moriah]

19. Given the number of boys molested by females, the author has a great point.

My dad was, at 12, and it definitely gave him confusion about what was right and correct in such instances. He'd had far more negative experiences younger at the hands of older boys, so he never really saw it as molestation even when he compared notes with other kids and she had molested all of them.