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Jesus Malverde

(10,274 posts)
Tue May 24, 2016, 10:41 AM May 2016

Young people more likely to live with parents now than any time in modern history

or the first time in modern history, living with parents has overtaken other living arrangements for 18-34-year-olds, according to a Pew Research Center report released Tuesday.

In 2014, 32.1 percent of young adults lived in their parents’ homes, edging out all other living arrangements, including marriage or cohabitation, living alone, or living as single parents or with roommates.

The change is fueled by a steep decline in the portion of young Americans settling down romantically over the past 50 years.

Since 1880, when the Census Bureau started keeping track, the most common arrangement for young people was to live with a spouse or significant other. That peaked in 1960, when 62 percent of 18 to 34-year-olds did so. Now, that number has fallen by half, with just 31.6 percent living with a romantic partner.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/social-issues/young-people-more-likely-to-live-with-parents-now-than-any-time-in-modern-history/2016/05/24/9ad6f564-2117-11e6-9e7f-57890b612299_story.html

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Young people more likely to live with parents now than any time in modern history (Original Post) Jesus Malverde May 2016 OP
Not to mention the ingrained lazy factor for 18-25 year old males and females snooper2 May 2016 #1
Of all of the children of friends and family I've seen grow up Bonx May 2016 #21
yep, 18-25s working 2 jobs while trying to get through school forjusticethunders May 2016 #31
Thank you. It can be a healthy thing. Parents are poor too Voice for Peace May 2016 #39
I don't think so either but forjusticethunders May 2016 #40
Aha.. But even when the relationship is good Voice for Peace May 2016 #46
Some work 2 jobs, some are in college, some just couchsurf and watch TV bhikkhu May 2016 #47
You sound like an economically privilaged jerk. Odin2005 May 2016 #42
well that was sweet of you, yes, I was economically privileged snooper2 May 2016 #49
You are missing the point, Millennials are looking for work AND CAN'T FIND ANY. Odin2005 May 2016 #56
I can find them a job- Tell me where they are and there will be a job to be found snooper2 May 2016 #62
It is not about being willing, it is about being able. Odin2005 May 2016 #65
yup fizzgig May 2016 #45
I was so much lazier than my kids BeyondGeography May 2016 #51
That's not what I notice at all. Turin_C3PO May 2016 #66
A group of us were talking about this the other day. Arkansas Granny May 2016 #2
Honestly it is the way we are raising them. redstatebluegirl May 2016 #5
Generally socio-economic changes occur because of economics. Giggity May 2016 #22
+a million laundry_queen May 2016 #48
I could only move out (back in '71) because annabanana May 2016 #27
It's much harder out there now. Turin_C3PO May 2016 #67
Yep, that's the way I remember it too! n/t RKP5637 May 2016 #26
Just out of curiosity I wonder what percent of those "parents' homes" have both parents still there. Gidney N Cloyd May 2016 #3
Very different world today. CompanyFirstSergeant May 2016 #4
Parental mores about sex have changed also. AngryAmish May 2016 #6
Good point. CompanyFirstSergeant May 2016 #7
With you there. cheapdate May 2016 #8
I can't decide the reason. hollowdweller May 2016 #9
They're talking just America, right? The2ndWheel May 2016 #10
I don't see it as wrong, just a different way. nolabear May 2016 #11
100 years ago this was normal. 2 of mine are currently here, and 2 i didn't birth Viva_La_Revolution May 2016 #12
If one or both of my daughters came back to live at home, I'd be okay with it. FLPanhandle May 2016 #13
Just curious what makes the boy a game changer? Egnever May 2016 #15
I'd say it depends. haele May 2016 #24
I would agree with you completely Egnever May 2016 #25
Some people have different ideas about morals than you do. former9thward May 2016 #44
I view it as if they are going to be in a committed live together relationship... FLPanhandle May 2016 #30
So it's OK for women to stay unemployed and lay around at home but the man has to have a job davidn3600 May 2016 #35
It's okay for the women in this case because they are my daughters. nt. FLPanhandle May 2016 #41
I think peoples attitudes about their kids contributes to this as much as anything Egnever May 2016 #14
Sounds like we grew up in the same neighborhood! nt raccoon May 2016 #54
This is perfectly normal in many societies Matrosov May 2016 #16
agreed treestar May 2016 #61
My neighborhood is crowded with kids who have bounced back after college or military service. hunter May 2016 #17
The rent is too damn high Johonny May 2016 #18
My son came back home for awhile when he went to grad school. femmocrat May 2016 #19
My family has a strong "stick togeather attitude," JPnoodleman May 2016 #20
Causation is important, but I don't think it's a bad thing Sen. Walter Sobchak May 2016 #23
in the Mideast it's called waithood: we lost a few buildings over that MisterP May 2016 #28
Don't blame McJobs. Octafish May 2016 #29
As a young adult myself I've noticed an unfair noneko May 2016 #32
Welcome to DU, thanks for sharing your story Fumesucker May 2016 #33
Thank you! I hope so too. noneko May 2016 #36
Exactly! Il_Coniglietto May 2016 #55
I'm glad you got out of that hole. noneko May 2016 #57
Thank you! Il_Coniglietto May 2016 #59
Thank you and I haven't given up hope yet! noneko May 2016 #60
Thank you for this post J_J_ May 2016 #63
I'm glad you see the struggle our country is in right now. noneko May 2016 #64
My 22 year old daughter... meaculpa2011 May 2016 #34
since the concept of extended family is not that strong now this works as a substitute? dembotoz May 2016 #37
The American Dream is dead. davidn3600 May 2016 #38
Rent is too high, wages are too low. romanic May 2016 #43
Thx Republicans for this fucked up economy uponit7771 May 2016 #50
I started college in 1972 at a state university. Tuition was $270 a quarter stopbush May 2016 #52
Well they *have* to live with them now... Orrex May 2016 #53
This is not always a bad thing. young people probably spend more on other things JI7 May 2016 #58
My mom wants me to move back in with her. eom MillennialDem May 2016 #68
 

snooper2

(30,151 posts)
1. Not to mention the ingrained lazy factor for 18-25 year old males and females
Tue May 24, 2016, 10:48 AM
May 2016

They came out of the womb with a DS3 in their hand LOL

Kind of odd when I talk with co-workers usually one kid is kicking ass and working hard to make something of themselves either in military, college, or starting career and the other kid is still "figuring out what to do"....

From my boss to my neighbor across the street. Shit, his son-in-law works IT for a school district. Is content, doesn't want to further education, thinks he is good to go in life (Right). BUT, expects my neighbor to CONTINUE to cover his wife (my neighbors daughter) on his health insurance. Well, that shit is ending soon since she will be turning 25...

Get Your Shit Together!

Bonx

(2,053 posts)
21. Of all of the children of friends and family I've seen grow up
Tue May 24, 2016, 01:52 PM
May 2016

I haven't been surprised at how any of their lives & careers are turning out. The ones I expected to do well have, and vice-versa.

 

forjusticethunders

(1,151 posts)
31. yep, 18-25s working 2 jobs while trying to get through school
Tue May 24, 2016, 03:31 PM
May 2016

are lazy

that's the problem

yeah there are some privileged kids sucking on their parents tit but in most cases, our generation can't fucking AFFORD to live away from our parents, even if they're abusive, bigoted, greedy,etc.

Also why are we raising the bar for basic independent existence - a bar that none of the boomers ever had to clear?

 

Voice for Peace

(13,141 posts)
39. Thank you. It can be a healthy thing. Parents are poor too
Tue May 24, 2016, 04:15 PM
May 2016

At least i am; and we are all in this boat together.
💛
Young people shouldn't feel pressure or ashamed for not being 100% independent. Who IS? Nobody. Pooling resources, extended family, all that.

 

forjusticethunders

(1,151 posts)
40. I don't think so either but
Tue May 24, 2016, 04:18 PM
May 2016

The problem is (at least in my friend circle) that almost all our parents are some combination of abusive, bigoted, irresponsible, or uncaring, My soon to be wife is essentially running away and never coming back because her parents won't accept her as trans, a bunch of my friends have had abusive parents, including the wife of one of my friends who actually got put in a fucking reparative therapy camp (aka LGBT concentration camps), another one of my friends IS running away from home because of bigotry, I have *several* friends who have been victims of sexual abuse, etc, etc.

Most of my friends cannot fucking wait to get away from their "families".

 

Voice for Peace

(13,141 posts)
46. Aha.. But even when the relationship is good
Tue May 24, 2016, 08:03 PM
May 2016

The kids feel shame.
Kids of abusive parents have an extra challenge in life: break the cycle. We carry so much of other people's shit. Vigilant self-awareness is needed to break the cycle.

Odin2005

(53,521 posts)
42. You sound like an economically privilaged jerk.
Tue May 24, 2016, 05:54 PM
May 2016

These people are stuck living with their parents for economic reasons, not because they are "lazy" or whatever the latest Establishment propaganda and lies are being spewed about us Millennials.

 

snooper2

(30,151 posts)
49. well that was sweet of you, yes, I was economically privileged
Wed May 25, 2016, 10:05 AM
May 2016

When I was 18 I was delivering pizza's and going to night school, I realized delivering pizza's didn't pay shit. So- My economically privileged ass got a job with a company that set mobile homes. Single wide, double wide- anything...

You know, putting steel anchors in a concrete slab and running tornado straps around the frame. Or if it was just dirt, running four foot augers into the ground for the strap to tie to. Also leveling by hauling concrete blocks once 6:00AM to load the truck then moving same blocks under the frame, putting in shims, leveling- etc.,

Yep, a lot of people can be an economically privileged jerk if you get off ones ass. Oh, and still went to school at night for telecom with my back aching-


Also- You spelled (privileged) wrong. If you want to through it out there at least spell it right LOL

Odin2005

(53,521 posts)
56. You are missing the point, Millennials are looking for work AND CAN'T FIND ANY.
Wed May 25, 2016, 05:24 PM
May 2016

THEY CAN'T FIND ANY, that is what needs to get though into your skull. You're mindset is no different than any RWer blaming poor people for being poor.

 

snooper2

(30,151 posts)
62. I can find them a job- Tell me where they are and there will be a job to be found
Thu May 26, 2016, 10:23 AM
May 2016

if one is willing to work- Sometimes hard work

Odin2005

(53,521 posts)
65. It is not about being willing, it is about being able.
Thu May 26, 2016, 04:06 PM
May 2016

Not all people are capable of doing all jobs. Humans are not interchangeable cogs.

Turin_C3PO

(13,952 posts)
66. That's not what I notice at all.
Thu May 26, 2016, 04:13 PM
May 2016

I see much more kids struggling to even find jobs today than they did even ten years ago, when I was in that age group. It's a bad situation out there, but on the other hand I don't think it's bad that kids are living at home. Many do have a part time job or a min.wage job and they can contribute some money and everyone lives happily together.

Arkansas Granny

(31,514 posts)
2. A group of us were talking about this the other day.
Tue May 24, 2016, 10:57 AM
May 2016

I graduated high school in 1964. Unless you were still in school, it was very unusual for people over the age of 21 to still be living at home. If you didn't get married, you found a roommate or two and got an apartment. Many of the guys were drafted at around age 21 and some enlisted. The unemployment rate was low, so finding a job wasn't really a problem. You could find furnished apartments and you could still buy a brand new Volkswagen for under $2,000.

I think young people today have a much harder time getting started and getting out on their own. It's a completely different world out there.

redstatebluegirl

(12,265 posts)
5. Honestly it is the way we are raising them.
Tue May 24, 2016, 11:12 AM
May 2016

Everybody gets a trophy, protect them from everything unpleasant, run interference when people are "mean to them".

They expect a nice car, nice apartment, going out to dinner the latest fashions without any consequences. Then if they are not successful, it is our fault somehow. Well it is in a way, we didn't raise resilient adults. Higher ed is catering to them the same way their parents did.

I had a student that graduated with a professional degree come into my office a couple of weeks after graduation asking how to move to a different city for a job. He had never rented an apartment on his own without his dad checking them out and writing the checks. He had already spent all of his graduation gifts so he didn't have enough for a deposit. He thought it was unfair the company who hired him didn't cover that expense....

I am not a mean old lady who kicks kids off my porch, I worked with them for over 30 years...I just saw all of this coming prior to my retirement.

 

Giggity

(86 posts)
22. Generally socio-economic changes occur because of economics.
Tue May 24, 2016, 02:01 PM
May 2016

Seldom, because of social.

And never because "participation trophy".

College is more necessary than ever before, and it is more expensive than at anytime after WW2, and entry level jobs are both more rare & doesn't pay as much since WW2.

A person could look at nothing but trends in insurance, college & housing expense and trends for entry level job income in order to accurately predict this consequence.

laundry_queen

(8,646 posts)
48. +a million
Tue May 24, 2016, 10:55 PM
May 2016

I did some math - a one bedroom apartment in my area currently goes for $1200/month. When I was 20 (20 years ago) that same apartment was $400/month. So rents have tripled. When I was 20, the minimum wage was $5.50/hr in my area (i'm in Canada). It is currently $11.20. Barely double. Pretty easy to see why moving out isn't happening. Oh, and tuition has also tripled. My 18 year old daughter won't be moving out any time soon, despite the fact that she works 30+ hours/week at her min wage job (and goes to school full time). Her and her 2 friends did up a budget and decided it just wasn't worth it to move out together.

annabanana

(52,791 posts)
27. I could only move out (back in '71) because
Tue May 24, 2016, 02:54 PM
May 2016

the entry level job that I got right out of college (receptionist) paid enough for me to get a 4th floor walk-up in Yorktown.

You don't get that kind of pay (or find that kind of apartment) anymore.

Turin_C3PO

(13,952 posts)
67. It's much harder out there now.
Thu May 26, 2016, 04:17 PM
May 2016

I've seen so much struggling, so have my parents. My parents are 65 and they talk about how much easier it was for them to get started in life, especially if you had a college education. It's harder even now than it was ten years ago when I was in the category, and it wasn't gravy for my generation.

BTW I think of the trophy generation as being more the early Millenials and late Gen Xers. Now everything's about cut-throat tests and all that shit with No Child Left Behind.

Gidney N Cloyd

(19,831 posts)
3. Just out of curiosity I wonder what percent of those "parents' homes" have both parents still there.
Tue May 24, 2016, 10:58 AM
May 2016

I could see living with one single parent (who might themselves be dating) a more attractive proposition for a young single adult than living with both parents.

 

CompanyFirstSergeant

(1,558 posts)
4. Very different world today.
Tue May 24, 2016, 11:06 AM
May 2016

First of all, houses are much bigger.

Many families of my generation purchased huge homes during the kid's high school years, and have plenty of space.

I currently have two bedrooms and an apartment in my house that are not used full time.

I wish my kids were working close enough to live with us.

Second, young people are managing huge debts for college and grad school.

Third, health care requires deductibles, co pays and such, which it did not years ago.

cheapdate

(3,811 posts)
8. With you there.
Tue May 24, 2016, 11:29 AM
May 2016

Our son is 21. He has a busy, full, life as a student in Boston. We love having him at home when he comes back to Tennessee and miss him when he's away. It feels so good to have him back at the house and I wish he could stay.

I wish I was closer to my parents, who are in Florida.

 

hollowdweller

(4,229 posts)
9. I can't decide the reason.
Tue May 24, 2016, 11:37 AM
May 2016

My wife and I graduated in 1983 and we were in the middle of the Reagan Recession.

We had been a couple for 3 years but had been in college. When we graduated we could not find good jobs so we lived at home for 2 more years till we could find living wage jobs.

Then I know kids who have graduated now, but they make so little money and rent and student loans are so much that they have to stay home.

THEN I know other kids that their parents let them have their girlfriends sleep over, they are allowed to smoke dope in the house and have all their friends there all the time.

When I grew up you weren't allowed to party and screw in your house out in the open. So everybody wanted their own space!

However I do think that the amount of rent is vs wages is out of balance now. So like if you are going to move out of your parents house to another city for a job you are frequently better off staying with your shitty job because with rent you are going to make less.

The2ndWheel

(7,947 posts)
10. They're talking just America, right?
Tue May 24, 2016, 11:41 AM
May 2016

It might be more normal globally.

In the 50's, 60's, 70's, I guess 80's too, Americans were needed. Or at least American men were needed. It was easier to get out of the house at 18. Now, men aren't needed as much, for either employment, or marriage. Why go through all the hassle of the day to day out there, if you have the option of being at home? Jobs are iffy, no girl, why not get lost in video games?

Women are now out there being more competitive. They don't need a guy, as the article points out. They can be more choosy.

The bottom of the rung, for both men and women, if you have the option, why not live with the parents and save something/anything? Unless you're exceptional at something, what chance do you have? You're competing globally, against both humans and increasingly machines. The pressures from all around are squeezing everyone.

Everyone is looking for some kind of meaning, and for some one avenue for that is at least family. Instead of the potential loneliness, be it physical, mental, or emotional, at least there are other people in the house.

Then there are other people that don't care if they're by themselves, and will live their life that way.

I guess whatever it takes to get you through your day.

nolabear

(41,959 posts)
11. I don't see it as wrong, just a different way.
Tue May 24, 2016, 12:28 PM
May 2016

I don't mean kids never growing up and sponging and so forth, but extended family co-ops and sharing child care and responsibilities when people are committed and reasonable and care about one another doesn't sound like the worst idea in the world to me. My sons are independent but one recently had a nasty health issue and has been around a lot as he recovers. I'm delighted that we can be here for him and I'm equally happy he and my other son (and daughter in law) think in terms of being there for us as we age.

Viva_La_Revolution

(28,791 posts)
12. 100 years ago this was normal. 2 of mine are currently here, and 2 i didn't birth
Tue May 24, 2016, 01:11 PM
May 2016

We all contribute to the bills and chores, every one is fed and secure in the fact that won't change. None of us could do it on our own anyway. They used to be embarrassed until I showed them the statistics and explained the recent changes in the custom of moving out so early. They also know they are helping me and grandpa by being here, and we are a stronger family because of it.

FLPanhandle

(7,107 posts)
13. If one or both of my daughters came back to live at home, I'd be okay with it.
Tue May 24, 2016, 01:17 PM
May 2016

Now, if they wanted to also bring some boy along too, then, nope, no way.



haele

(12,646 posts)
24. I'd say it depends.
Tue May 24, 2016, 02:42 PM
May 2016

If he can get along with the parents and was able to contribute to the running of the household, fine.

We had the kidlet and her then-POSSLQ (person of opposite sex sharing living quarters - I suppose person of same sex sharing living quarters is POSSSLQ) staying with us for three years until he was able to convince his real-estate investing grandparents to front them a condo when they finally got married. While he got along with us in general, he didn't really contribute much, and that got to be a bit of a strain.

On the flip side, my brother lived with our parents through college and three years of work until he got married only because his wife had three kids by a previous marriage and she already had an apartment. While he was dating his now wife, it was only technically, but still - he stayed at home saving the majority of his money until he decided he was able to strike out on his own comfortably. He paid food and board, helped around the house, and banked pretty much everything else other than the used car he purchased to get around on. It was a win-win for both him and our parents, who didn't have to hire a handyman to help Mom and Dad with the light household repairs and renovations.
See, we grew up poor, and he didn't want to worry about raising a family without something to fall back on in case of an emergency.

So it can work if everyone gets along.

Haele

 

Egnever

(21,506 posts)
25. I would agree with you completely
Tue May 24, 2016, 02:45 PM
May 2016

I was just curious why the person I responded to drew the line there.

Personally I will help support my kids any way I can if that means a significant other in the house with us I am fine with that assuming that significant other is as you say helping to contribute to the well being of the family.

FLPanhandle

(7,107 posts)
30. I view it as if they are going to be in a committed live together relationship...
Tue May 24, 2016, 03:15 PM
May 2016

Then be self supporting. If they can't, then just date.

Two people working should be able to share a small apartment. If my daughter is for some reason unemployed, but the guy is working, then maybe...

If she is working but some guy is laying around...Nope, not going to happen.

 

davidn3600

(6,342 posts)
35. So it's OK for women to stay unemployed and lay around at home but the man has to have a job
Tue May 24, 2016, 03:59 PM
May 2016

And then we wonder why we have a gender pay gap....

 

Egnever

(21,506 posts)
14. I think peoples attitudes about their kids contributes to this as much as anything
Tue May 24, 2016, 01:18 PM
May 2016

When I was a kid we were to be seen and not heard.

These days people have a much closer relationship to their children. I think it is a good thing and I can't imagine pushing my kids out the door like my parents did to me.

 

Matrosov

(1,098 posts)
16. This is perfectly normal in many societies
Tue May 24, 2016, 01:20 PM
May 2016

I'm not sure why many Americans look down on adult children living at home. If the family gets along and the adult child is contributing to the household somehow, what does it matter?

This is perfectly normal in many societies. Sometimes the adult child doesn't move out until marriage. In some cases, you might have the parents, adult children, and grandparents, all living in the same place.

treestar

(82,383 posts)
61. agreed
Thu May 26, 2016, 08:48 AM
May 2016

Not such a big deal; in fact, it is more efficient. It's consumeristic to be upset at their not being more households and more stuff.

hunter

(38,309 posts)
17. My neighborhood is crowded with kids who have bounced back after college or military service.
Tue May 24, 2016, 01:23 PM
May 2016

Wages are not high enough that they can afford places of their own. Not even a crappy apartment.

It's that simple.

My wife owned our house free and clear when our kids were born.

Granted, it was an older house in a sketchy Midwestern neighborhood, but we haven't achieved anything close to that sort of housing security since we moved back to California.

My parents, and two of my siblings have left California. My sister lives in a place surrounded by mean ignorant racist people who vote Republican then wonder why their children are living at home addicted to alcohol, heroin, or meth and having babies at fifteen.

If children have good schools, and then good jobs when they graduate from high school, college, or military service, they don't generally stick around.

But even if they do, that's okay too, so long as it's agreeable to everyone, and they can live as adults. Moms shouldn't be doing their twenty-something's laundry, buying all the groceries, or making excuses to their kid's boss when kid is too hungover to get out of bed in the morning.

My mom had us doing our own laundry at eight years old. We had a whole mess of people living in a three bedroom house. It was always noisy. There was always someone in the bathroom when you wanted to use it. The septic tank frequently overflowed. Two of my siblings left home at sixteen to escape the crowds, finding their own work and housing. The rest of us did okay too. I lived homeless for a while, but that was for mental health issues. My parents would have taken me back, no problem, and sometimes they did.

My kids are college graduates and not living with us. I wouldn't be upset if they had to move back home for any reason. I wouldn't be upset if they left the U.S.A. either. This nation is a mess.






Johonny

(20,829 posts)
18. The rent is too damn high
Tue May 24, 2016, 01:25 PM
May 2016

It's not just in big cities either in many small towns there is simply no place to go.

femmocrat

(28,394 posts)
19. My son came back home for awhile when he went to grad school.
Tue May 24, 2016, 01:33 PM
May 2016

I loved having another responsible adult here. Made life a lot easier for us. I wouldn't mind if he moved back again!

JPnoodleman

(454 posts)
20. My family has a strong "stick togeather attitude,"
Tue May 24, 2016, 01:41 PM
May 2016

So me living with them for awhile wasn't really a problem. We pulled our resources and managed to live in a home. And believe me, I come from an area were its "18 and OUT OF HERE!" firmly entrenched, and many of my friends just end up in the worst possible jobs and on a treadmill until their dead. (Though the area I grew up in is kind of atypical in that opportunities are few and ways out are even fewer)

But the general problem is expenses. There are fewer avenues for apartments, housing ect were the jobs are. There is dirt cheap housing in some places were I came from, but there were no jobs or if there were they paid so little that you saved nothing anyway. In the Cities there are jobs but rent is insane now and if you do leave you parents house you end up with about 7 roommates in a 1 bedroom place. Heck even in my hometown that was often true, my closest friend lived with a boyfriend and girlfriend and another guy in a cramped STUDIO apartment for 500 a month.

All of this also contributes to our relative reluctance to "settle down," and make families. Who can plan a family when realistically you have no idea were your next job will be or were you will be in a year even. Since work is increasingly casualized/uberized/task rabbit ect, there is no stability or predictability for most.

You can't plan a family when you cannot even reliably know were you will work or live in six months time.

 

Sen. Walter Sobchak

(8,692 posts)
23. Causation is important, but I don't think it's a bad thing
Tue May 24, 2016, 02:13 PM
May 2016

A lot of my young relatives are living in all sorts of stupid, uncomfortable and unstable yet expensive living arrangements.

At my parents insistence I didn't leave home till I could afford to buy a house, it was the right decision. Although with two back-to-back Ted Cruz grade college roommates they didn't have to push very hard.

MisterP

(23,730 posts)
28. in the Mideast it's called waithood: we lost a few buildings over that
Tue May 24, 2016, 03:05 PM
May 2016
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Waithood

our family has strong stick-together tendencies too

and I'm dang tired of it!

noneko

(33 posts)
32. As a young adult myself I've noticed an unfair
Tue May 24, 2016, 03:31 PM
May 2016

abysmal lopsidedness when it comes to current wages and living expenses. I want to put it into perspective for everyone.

I'm 24, I went to one of the top 100 high school in the US and my college ranks 30 in the WORLD. I graduated 2 years ago and I'm working part-time (self-employed) and I'm at an unpaid internship at a non-profit to boost my portfolio and resume. I was unemployed 2-3 months altogether last year. The second time was because of a work related injury. It usually takes 1-2 months to find another job.

I make about $600-900 a month average. My rent is $600 for a little room in a 3/1 with two other roommates. I am 3 states away from my family so they can't drop everything and come help me and they're also poor so no help with money. I'm obviously on food stamps or I would be starving. I haven't bought new clothes in about a year and if I do, they are at a thrift shop or very cheap online. I don't spend on anything else. No video games, no tech, no new clothes, nothing. So you can't assume I'm spending what little money I have on unnecessary things.

A lot of my friends who have graduated are still living with their parents. They're are in low paying jobs with large amount of college debt. Did I mention I was in the hole 20k? I'm supposed to be paying $200/month but like hell I can afford that so I pay $50/month which means I'm accruing a ton of interest.

I can't live with my parents right now and if I could I wouldn't want to go back to that state.

Oh and for entry-level jobs you need 2-5 years of experience. Which is why most are stuck in retail or the food industry. This economy is as stupid and impossible as never before. The min wage hasn't increase in decades while the price of living soars every year. There not many jobs contrary what the gov says. Unemployment/part-time only rate for young adults is 30-50% in many areas. There's a reason for that and it's not because we're lazy. Baby boomers don't want to retire either so they hold onto their jobs and don't let it trickle to the next generation.

You can tell how frustrating it is. I'm 24 and I was on the verge of being homeless last year for god's sakes. No person should have to face homelessness ever.

Sorry for the rant. I just hate it when people say we're lazy as a whole or entitled. This is a serious matter and if we do something about it than the entire nation will crumble because young people are the foundations and the future of a country.

Fumesucker

(45,851 posts)
33. Welcome to DU, thanks for sharing your story
Tue May 24, 2016, 03:45 PM
May 2016

I hope things get better for you and your generation...

Il_Coniglietto

(373 posts)
55. Exactly!
Wed May 25, 2016, 02:40 PM
May 2016

I was in a situation similar to yours a few years ago. I was working full-time at minimum wage, making just enough money to pay rent, eat, and save what little was left over. I had to put school off for the longest time because I simply couldn't afford it. Clothes, electronics, a social life? No money for them. I just worked, slept and saved, for far more years than I'd have liked. Now I'm working and in college finally, but I had to move back home so I could pay for it (my rent was over 75% of my budget when I lived alone/had a roommate). Still can't seem to let go of some of my old frugal habits though, but at least I'm saving a lot more now and that degree is in sight!

It's easy for some to dismiss our generation as lazy, entitled, sensitive, "don't know hard work" whiners. I'm sure parents in the 1960s felt the same way about their hippy kids. But maybe, just maybe, we are doing the best we can. And it would be awful PROGRESSIVE of some of you to recognize that.

noneko

(33 posts)
57. I'm glad you got out of that hole.
Wed May 25, 2016, 09:24 PM
May 2016

It's not living, it's surviving and it's a terrible way to spend your life.

Living at home is the best savings you could have. Frugal habits are pretty useful too! It helps you save more money and then you can use it to travel or pay for things that matter.

I always ask myself when I buy something, "Do I WANT this or do I NEED this?" 99% of the time I have to put it back...

Il_Coniglietto

(373 posts)
59. Thank you!
Wed May 25, 2016, 11:36 PM
May 2016

We do the best we can, you know? But life is a marathon, not a sprint, so sometimes you have to sacrifice the "right now" for a better future. The key is to not get complacent. I know too many people in similar situations who just accepted that that was all they were going to make of their lives. They lost hope that they could be more and now, as you said, they're simply surviving.

I wish you all the best with your situation as well. The unpaid internship scam is insane, as is the "entry-level" position. Not to mention seeing ads for jobs that pay $9/hour but want a bachelor's. Then add in student loans...ugh, it makes my blood boil.

But apparently we're not grateful and don't work hard enough?

noneko

(33 posts)
60. Thank you and I haven't given up hope yet!
Thu May 26, 2016, 01:04 AM
May 2016

My partner is always telling to keep working hard and somebody will notice (I'm a designer). So that's what I'll be doing. Artists are almost always never paid especially when they start out. Everyone wants things designed or created for free.

I can't even imagine the people who give up and are content at a repetitive, mindless job for the rest of our lives!

People who say we're not grateful/lazy are out of touch with reality. Those struggling gotta stick together!

 

J_J_

(1,213 posts)
63. Thank you for this post
Thu May 26, 2016, 12:35 PM
May 2016

I read both reddit (young people) and DU (older boomers) and it seems that some of the older people could use some help understanding today's reality.

Too many "I got mine F you" types.

These same old people think it's great to vote Hillary cause they want to see a woman president before they die, and have no comprehension/compassion that more of the same will not do!

They keep telling us the economy is getting better, everything is going great.

We need more young people to confront their elders with the reality of today's America, created by older generation's selfishness and/or apathy.

Older generations who created the mess are now blaming young people for not being able to live in it.

It just makes me so damn angry.

I am gen X, and my kids just hit college age and I can't for the life of me figure out why I should pressure them to go to college, get in debt, then not get a job.

I am giving them time to figure out what they want to do, pursue their creative talents and maybe create something new because that is what young people are going to have to do.

Corrupt politicians sent all the jobs overseas and are trying to send more with the TPP or import more workers like Hillary.



Can I just say !I'm Sorry! for my part in this mess. I have been working for change since I got out of college but everything just keeps getting worse. Probably because so damn many old people are in denial. /rant

noneko

(33 posts)
64. I'm glad you see the struggle our country is in right now.
Thu May 26, 2016, 02:35 PM
May 2016

People understand it when you break it down which is what I tried to do. It's easier to compare numbers than to figure out the economy and price of living in vague terms.

So many are blind to the struggles of people around them and assume if they themselves are well off than everybody else is.

They say it's not hard to find a job when they haven't job searched in 30-40 years.
They say living expenses aren't high when they have paid off their mortgage and own their house already.
They say just work while you're in college so you can pay for it without realizing college tuition has more than tripled since they last went and min wage has barely doubled.

Of course they can't see the mess we live in. They live in another world and time.

I'm glad you're not pushing your kids to college right away. They should figure out exactly what they want to do or study before going to college. I made the mistake of going before I knew what I wanted to do. And they should only go if it's something that requires a degree like medicine, engineering, science, law etc. If they want a liberal/fine arts education then community college is best.

Thank you for your support! I'm happy there are people out there who see the country for what it is and are trying to improve it.

meaculpa2011

(918 posts)
34. My 22 year old daughter...
Tue May 24, 2016, 03:46 PM
May 2016

works two jobs and has two housemates in a rental a few miles from us. She calls when her car needs an oil change or the plumbing gets stopped up. I'm happy to do it.

My 26 year old son has one part-time job, doesn't have a driver's license, sleeps all day (when he's not at the comic book store) and plays computer games all night.

He sleeps in the This End Up bed we bought when he was two years old.

Did I mention that I drive him/pick him up from work at the supermarket four blocks from home?

dembotoz

(16,799 posts)
37. since the concept of extended family is not that strong now this works as a substitute?
Tue May 24, 2016, 04:00 PM
May 2016

nice having the kid around

 

davidn3600

(6,342 posts)
38. The American Dream is dead.
Tue May 24, 2016, 04:03 PM
May 2016

That's the reality. Today's living expenses can't be met by the average wages.

stopbush

(24,395 posts)
52. I started college in 1972 at a state university. Tuition was $270 a quarter
Wed May 25, 2016, 10:30 AM
May 2016

and a full course load was 12-21 hours. I had some quarters where I took 23 hours of credit - had to have it approved first, but it still cost me only $270.

That $270 is around $1550 these days adjusted for inflation. Both of my kids are in CC. A 3-hour credit course costs them around $300, so if they were to take 8 classes as I did, it would cost them $2400.

And we live in CA where college was free back in the early 70s. Today, not so much.

Orrex

(63,199 posts)
53. Well they *have* to live with them now...
Wed May 25, 2016, 11:18 AM
May 2016

because those other times in modern history have already passed. Duh!

JI7

(89,244 posts)
58. This is not always a bad thing. young people probably spend more on other things
Wed May 25, 2016, 09:31 PM
May 2016

Especially things like travel.

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