Stuff it: Millennials nix their parents’ treasures

[Jesus Malverde]

A seismic shift of stuff is underway in homes all over America.

Members of the generation that once embraced sex, drugs and rock-and-roll are trying to offload their place settings for 12, family photo albums and leather sectionals.

Their offspring don’t want them.

As baby boomers, born between 1946 and 1964, start cleaning out attics and basements, many are discovering that millennials, born between 1980 and 2000, are not so interested in the lifestyle trappings or nostalgic memorabilia they were so lovingly raised with.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/boomers-unwanted-inheritance/2015/03/27/0e75ff6e-45c4-11e4-b437-1a7368204804_story.html

[arcane1]

1. How the hell is 1964 still part of the "baby boom" when actual boomers were old enough to have kids?

Sorry, that was slightly off-topic

[braddy]

5. Nineteen years, pretty typical for a "generation", the Rolling Stones, Jane Fonda, and Audie Murphy

are the "silent generation" 1925-1945.

[arcane1]

12. Yeah, it always seemed odd to me. I'm practically the same generation as my own parents :)

[braddy]

15. I think it's odd how the 1960s is attributed to the boomers.

In 1965 the oldest boomer was 19 and the youngest was one.

It wasn't 12 year olds and 18 year olds who made the 1960s.

Very few of the musicians, movie makers, and young leaders of the 1960s were boomers. They were almost entirely older generations.

[LisaM]

30. I've thought that too.

A lot of things the Boomers get blamed for were actually perpetuated by Reagan's generation.

[braddy]

37. It depends on what you mean, but for government and institutions, yes.

For some reason writers keep giving the impression that 15 and 20 year olds ran America during the 1960s instead of the usual age groups of about 40-65 (roughly). Reagan, JFK, LBJ, judges, college presidents, generals, senators and congressmen, mayors and movie directors, music record moguls, governors, police chiefs, CEOs, company presidents, union leaders.

People don't realize that the first presidential election in which ALL boomers were finally old enough to vote, was in 1984, boomers were not running anything in the 1960s.

[former9thward]

160. And they elected Reagan in a landslide in 1984.

[braddy]

162. Everyone voted for Reagan in 1984. Why pick on boomers?

To elaborate, boomers would have ranged from roughly age 20 through 38.

The vote that year by age was

18-29 years old=59% Reagan
30-44 years old=57% Reagan
45-59 years old=60% Reagan
60 and older =60% Reagan

[wain]

135. How many years to a generation

28 years says Will Durant in his "The Story of Civilization."

[braddy]

137. The boomers for instance are 1946-1964, the silent generation 1925-1945.

The Census bureau and the government for instance, uses the generally accepted dates of the generations.

[HuckleB]

11. '63-'65 is considered on the edge between BB and Gen X.

At least that's what my memory indicates. I may need to be corrected.

[hatrack]

38. I'd always heard it described as "Generation Jones" - 60=65

[HuckleB]

40. That's new to me, but interesting!

[TexasBushwhacker]

77. Yup, as in "Keeping Up With the Jones" n/t

[TuxedoKat]

142. First Desribed by the person who coined it as 54-65

http://www.medialifemagazine.com:8080/news2001/mar01/mar12/4_thurs/news3thursday.html

[Reter]

154. No way

I don't consider anyone 10 years older than I am a fellow Xer. Xers were club kids in the early 90's and made Nirvana popular. I'm '73, and as X as they come.

[SheilaT]

56. Actually, I prefer the baby boom years

given by William Strauss and Neil Howe in their amazing book Generations, which I apparently am the only person in North America who has read it. They set the Boomer years as 1943-1960, and I agree with them. Those born in the last two years of WWII benefitted completely from everything we associate with the Boomer years. They are NOT Silent Generation people.

And those born in the early 60's are likewise NOT Boomers, although they may tend to identify with them. They really belong to GenX (which Strauss and Howe named Thirteeners in their book).

Please, please, read that book. It came out in 1992 and is not, in my opinion, out of date. Their analysis of generational types and different kinds of eras is highly accurate.

[arcane1]

65. Thanks for the recommendation, it sounds like a fascinating book!

Being born in 1967, I don't always feel like I belong in any of those groups. It does seem to me that people born around that time are among the last to grow up with real connections to previous generations, at least in terms of entertainment. While there were differences in style, there was still a connection to the past. I could play my grandmother's records on my record player. Our after-school television shows were all old stuff: Little Rascals, Three Stooges, etc. Stuff my parents also watched as kids.

I don't see much of that connection anymore.

[SheilaT]

75. Generations is

a serious time commitment. The main text is some 438 pages, and there's another thirty pages of appendix and charts.

They wrote a second book, called The Fourth Turning. It came out in 1998, involves a slight revision of some of their theory, and is essentially a look at the generations currently in place in this country, and with a look into the future as to how the next eighty or so years might play out. It's remarkably prescient. I'll just give you this hint: They say that in 2005, give or take a few years, something will happen that will precipitate the next Crisis era. They suggest several scenarios, including a serious tax rebellion or a major outbreak of a deadly, communicable disease that evokes serious quarantine measures.

They also suggest that terrorists might blow up an aircraft, maybe claim it has a portable nuclear weapon that it could set off in some American city. Another possibility might be an impasse over the federal budget that leads to a government shut down, the potential suspension of Social Security checks.

They don't claim to foresee precisely what could happen, but they do say that whatever the trigger is, the response will be so strong that a new Era will commence. They do say this: "An initial spark will trigger a chain reaction of unyielding responses and further emergencies. The core elements of these scenarios (debt, civic decay, global disorder) will matter more than the details, which the catalyst will juxtapose and connect in some unknowable way."

They continue on, correctly analyzing what came about not too long after the book was published, and which continues today.

The book Generations altered how I perceive history and how people behave. I often note someone's generational position, especially if I'm disagreeing with them about something, and then they make sense to me.

If you can do so, read Generations first, then the other, because the first one gives a full context as to their entire scheme of generational types, and how history forms sort of a grand circle. It doesn't repeat itself exactly. They are crystal clear on that, but the similarities are powerful.

I have been pushing this book here on DU for years, and if anyone has ever gotten around to reading it, I've never seen that referenced here. I hope you get a chance to read the books and that you get a lot from them.

[arcane1]

79. Thanks again! I'm adding it to my list now :)

I get 80 minutes of reading time a day, whether I want it or not, so its size won't scare me

[SheilaT]

81. Good.

And get back to me after you've read it.

I have actually read it twice, and I really need to read it again, but there are so many other books out in the other room, flapping their covers at me, demanding my attention. Hell, I shouldn't be spending so much time on DU.

[Odin2005]

125. Their 1997 book "The Fourth Turning" is also a good read.

[drmeow]

84. It is based on birth rates

not years/generations:



Notice that another "boom" starts around 1984 - a boomlet

[Odin2005]

124. Sociologists William Strauss and Neil Howe start Generation X at 1961.

According to them the folks born in the early 60s are sociologically Gen-X even though they are part of the demographic boom.

[MisterP]

2. probably a consequence of having had to buy everything on their own IF they could

even move out: even buying a bed is an accomplishment: there's little room for sentiment when whole middle-class families are rousted into apartments: there's just no space

with space and child-having at a premium, the last thing they want is to fill their hard-earned space with blankets and trophies suitable for a baby that'll be long in coming

Victoriana wasn't that big in the 30s-50s, after all; it had to wait until the 80s antiquing fad (bakelite everywhere!)

ironically Midcentury Modern's back in the cities after having hid out in the burbs--woohoo!

[HuckleB]

10. Midcentury was big in the mid '0s, but it's fading now.

Which means one can find plenty of deals on the stuff in antique shops.

[TexasBushwhacker]

67. I don't know if its fading

The high end stuff perhaps, but the stuff that was made for middle class buyers is still pretty popular. I have some Lane and G Plan furniture that's a heck of a lot better made than furniture made today. If you like contemporary lines it's still a good buy.

[Skittles]

3. this just seems stupid

I'm a boomer and I wouldn't try to pass of my old couch to anyone

[HuckleB]

7. I don't know. Some of those couches were made to last.

I moved out of the house with my parents' already 20-year-old couch, and that thing lasted, solidly, with another 20 years of constant use. That's much longer than anything I've purchased on my own.

[tazkcmo]

29. We re-upholstered ours.

I learned how to re-upholster furniture when I was old enough to pull on the fabric. 6 kids, we tore up some fabric but the actual frame and stuffing were almost indestructible. Almost.

[HuckleB]

33. Those frames were seriously incredible!

[tazkcmo]

35. And heavy!

We'd have to carry those suckers (We had 2 huge sofas) down the to the basement every spring and we'd swarm 'em and knock out a new cover in a couple hours. Then heft 'em back up and start jumping on them! Drove our Sainted Mother nuts!

We also made our own clothes and grew our own food. We also got in lots of fights. lol

[HuckleB]

52. Oh, indeed. Still, I don't see titanium couches taking over the planet, just yet.

Last edited Thu May 26, 2016, 04:58 AM - Edit history (1)

[snooper2]

165. Holy shit, after that much time there must have been another 40 lbs of dandruff and dirt

LOL

[GulfCoast66]

23. Bad Move throwing out that couch

Those 60s and 70s couches have American-made hard wood frames. It is well worth paying the money to have them re-covered. With some proper care they will last another 50 years.

I will never buy another new couch. Find an old one in the style you like in decent condition and have it re-covered.

[HuckleB]

34. And some of them have serious steel keeping them together, to boot.

[csziggy]

63. Or as in the case of some of my parents' furniture - all wood frames

They have one chair dating from just after WWII when metal was still hard to find and expensive. It has no metal in the construction. The joints are pegged and the upholstery is backed with webbing not metal springs - the only metal are the tacks that hold that webbing on the frame.

Mom reupholstered it twice and it is still just as solid as when she and Dad bought it as newlyweds in 1946. The only problem with it is the design - it's like sitting in a bucket!

[TexasBushwhacker]

82. Reupholstering can cost as much as a new couch!

But I agree, the old stuff is better made than the newer, unless you can afford to spend $10K plus on your furniture. I'm just not one to spend $3K on a sofa.

[840high]

89. My 60's couch

lasted through 3 moves, 1 child, 2 grandsons, too many cats and dogs to mention. They don't make them like that anymore.

[GummyBearz]

158. My wife and I wouldn't take our boomer parents couch if they parachuted it down into our house

However, we got a couch from my great grandma that is absolutely incredible. Hand carved wood frame with ornate engravings and original leather. We don't know how old it is, just that she bought it in 1950 and it was already an antique at that time. It is the center piece of of our living room.

Fuck yo couch walmart! (reference for "fuck yo couch" to be clear:

)

[HuckleB]

4. ZZZZzzz. Classic sloppy journalism filler.

The same author could easily find evidence to the contrary, and write the opposite piece.

College level journalism at its worst should not get published at WaPo. We have a crisis in the Fourth Estate.

[melman]

6. A couch is one thing

but why wouldn't someone want their mom's silverware? I don't get that.

[HuckleB]

8. Most people would, if you actually did a real survey, I suspect.

I could be wrong, but there's no survey to show it, either way.

[Quantess]

127. Exactly. If this article were based on anything more than the author's whimsy

after overhearing a conversation in the break room, we might get a bit more substantive analysis. This article is like a college sophomore writing exercise.

[Chan790]

17. What do I need silver service for 12 for when most of my friends can't afford Dixie cups? n/t

[melman]

20. Uh

Because then you'd be the one that had more than Dixie Cups?


But that's not the point anyway. Things that come from your family have value. Because they come from you family.


That's the point.

[Chan790]

24. Not to me.

I am anti-nostalgia. When I was 18, my mother gave me all my ornaments from the Christmas tree...and I gave them back to her, saying she valued them more than me. When I was 22, the same conversation. When I was 30, again. At age 34, I got tired of her not accepting that I was never going to want them...and I took them to WalMart and threw them in the dumpster...and she cried for 3 days for "the memories I threw away." Things from my family and/or my childhood don't have value to me...my own memento-items that I've been compelled to keep, such as a HS letter jacket and my college graduation robes and sash, don't even have any value to me.

I already have more than Dixie cups (I grew up wealthy)...and no desire to own fine silver or the family Bible. These things don't even have resale value...nobody wants them. It's clutter and garbage. I don't value things. I'm a possessions minimalist with strongly-defined personal tastes.

So...there is no point. I don't want to keep garbage just because it's meaningful to other people.

[SheilaT]

60. The tragedy here is not that you threw memories away,

but that she was too obtuse to get that you seriously didn't want them.

[RobinA]

152. You Threw

Things that were important to your mother in the dumpster? Nice.

[Chan790]

155. She didn't want them either.

She wanted me to keep them; it is par for the course for her emotional manipulation and controlling behavior. I made it clear that if she didn't want them, they were going in the garbage. I made every effort to get her to keep them because they were important to her. I don't want them. They're not important to me. I don't want to be reminded of my childhood...it was hell on Earth trapped between an emotionally-abusive alcoholic with BPD and a violent white-supremicist alcoholic that tried to murder me in my sleep. Who wants to be reminded of that shit by boxes of other people's garbage?

I also don't want my baby pictures...and she's learned her lesson and stopped trying to foist those on me too because she knows they'll be going in the dumpster too. So will my plaster footprints and any other mementos of a childhood I typically deny having ever happened.

She says "You'll want them someday to show your own kids and put on your own tree."

I'm surgically sterile and child-free. I also don't decorate for Christmas. I'm never getting married, I don't believe in it. The future she wants and alludes to is never going to happen. I'm an adult...it's my life and they're my possessions to do with as I please.

What this is, is her hoarding and me not being willing to be forced to hang onto garbage that I not only don't want, but any emotional attachments I did have to them is negative. I don't have any regrets about any of this.

[snooper2]

166. I've got some old sport coats that don't fit anymore, you interested?

[jwirr]

144. When I was younger I did not want it because it had to be

polished. As to that sectional it is too big for most homes now. And I have boxes full of old photos. Most are so old the kids have no idea who the people are.

[AnnieBW]

146. I've got two plastic tubs worth of silver

in my storage garage. Thanks, Mom. :p

[Person 2713]

9. Sell the items and give your kids the $.Take digital pics of somestuff from their youth and send it

they have room for that not an extra closet for the actual items

[Bigmack]

13. Most of the stuff... you can't GIVE it away...

Take a look at the "free stuff" section of Craigslist.
Free pianos... free couches... all kinds of stuff.

I brought a Noritake china service for 12 home from Japan in 1963. I finally got $90 for it, from a woman who wanted "retro" stuff.

[RKP5637]

73. It is, the shops here are just full of stuff. IMO the whole notion of what possessions are is

Last edited Fri May 27, 2016, 08:34 AM - Edit history (1)

drastically changing. On eBay, I find things that should sell don't. Also, many thrift stores and the like don't want furniture, even if it's of high quality. It takes up a lot of space and sits. Times are changing drastically IMO.

Also, with the future tenuous, I can see why people don't want to be saddled with a bunch of stuff.

I have a lot of my parents stuff, I was recently telling someone this is ridiculous, I don't even have room for my own stuff. I feel guilty throwing out all of my parents pictures, and the like, and all sorts of stuff from my childhood, but I'm the last, and when I'm gone someone is just going to toss it into a dumpster and sell the house off. I might as well be the one to dump it now than some stranger.

[yeoman6987]

157. Picture -scan in the computer

You'd be surprised how some long line cousin may suddenly get interested in family genealogy. You can then just forward the pictures while not having them all over the house.

[RKP5637]

164. That, is a great idea!!!

[malaise]

14. They'll wish they changed their minds in ten years

I remember watching persons get rid of crafted mahogany and replacing it with vinyl because that was in fashion.

I never have enough family photos and I share then with our entire family. My oldest niece adores one of the photos of her grandma because she looks exactly like her in that photo.

[JustAnotherGen]

16. I agree

I'm furnishing my home after a two year gut and renovation (historic home) and my mom just admitted a few days ago that she shouldn't have told my great Aunt to just sell my Great Grandmother's mirrored 1920s furniture. I adored it. She offered it to me via my mom and she said "sell it." Now I'm buying replicas of the 1920s pieces that were in immaculate condition in her attic for decades. My early boomer mom simply didn't appreciate the 1920s style of furniture.

And nope - I don't want her rustic colonial and amish pine. That won't make my house look like Jay Gatsby and Marie Antoinette got together, got drunk on champagne and threw all up over my house.

[malaise]

19. That's amazing

Nice post - Too many folks don't appreciate quality - and opt for fashion.

I know what you mean re the look

[hatrack]

42. Speaking as a veteran of the Harvest Gold shag carpet generation . . . .

Last edited Wed May 25, 2016, 10:01 PM - Edit history (1)

I can't say that growing up in that . . . era . . . necessarily taught me what good taste was. It did, however, definitely show me what bad taste was.

Couldn't agree more with your upthread comment about discarding quality for fashion.

[malaise]

45. ROFL

Some nice posts on this thread

[hatrack]

53. Oh, it gets worse . . .

Don't know if you saw the movie "Sideways", but there's a scene early on where Bart Giamatti's character drops by his Mom's house with his buddy as they're preparing to start their roadtrip.

The sad part is that his character pretends he's there to check in on his Mom and see how she's doing, but he's actually there to slip some cash out of her purse to help pay for his bachelor party vacation.

The sadder part is that his Mom's house is furnished to perfection with 70s stuff - and the pleated-front gold couch is the exact same one in my parents' house.

AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

[malaise]

54. Haven't seen it

Looks like I should

[Blue_In_AK]

95. That was a fun movie.

I think it was my first introduction to Paul Giamatti. Thomas Hayden Church was hilarious.

[RKP5637]

80. Ahhh, and Harvest Gold appliances, and wow, those olivicola kitchens!!!

My sister had one, the entire kitchen was olivicola, appliances and all, actually it was sort of pretty.

Harvest Gold appliances with the burnt sugar like brown edges, I forget what that was called. Yuck. Then one apartment I rented had all pink appliances, the entire kitchen was pink. Another yuck!

[hatrack]

88. To be fair, the house I describe was the first house we owned that I remembered . . .

. . . . and for my parents, both Depression kids, both frugal not quite to a fault, buying it was a big deal - and God bless them both for buying it!

But . . . All rooms but one in green shag wall-to-wall carpet. There were two exceptions - the carpeted kitchen - - covered with what appeared to be pressed, dehydrated industrial gray lard, and my brother's room, with gold shag from wall to paneled wall.

The gold shag, alone among these legendary rooms, survives . . .

[RobinA]

153. My Grandmother's

Avocado blender just threw a blade last year and it STILL WORKS better than my brand new one. The broken '60's appliance beats the black and stainless Ninja.

[RKP5637]

156. Some of those appliances were built to last forever. We have an Oster from back then and it

keeps going on and on. My sister's Avocado kitchen was quite pretty.

[brer cat]

47. After planting that image in our minds...

you must have an open house and invite us all to see it!!

[hatrack]

66. Or at least post some photos!

[dixiegrrrrl]

18. Before I moved across country I offered my grown kids my stuff.

Nope...not interested.

Too bad...cause when I am ready to downsize, those oak antique pieces are still gonna be worth money.

[malaise]

21. Yep they're worth real money as well

I have friends who don't know what to do with their paintings - their kids don't want them.
It's sad.

[LeftyMom]

25. Art is rough, because sometimes it just don't match your taste.

My mom had a gigantic print that she schlepped through I don't know how many moves, and never sold even when she desperately needed the money. Hell, she got a tattoo of it. She loved that thing.

When she died it was the one thing I went straight over to her house to get, even before I went to the funeral home to sign paperwork.

And I have NO EFFING IDEA where I'm going to display it, because it couldn't possibly match my things any less (contrary to stereotype it doesn't match because it's twenty years newer than the stuff I collect.) I think the plan right now is to put it in the spare bedroom, redo that whole room around it and give up any hope of that room visually connecting to the rest of the house.

[malaise]

28. I know what you mean but you have it

fashion returns and your great grands may love it

[HuckleB]

39. Indeed.

My parents had some cheap art that I would never have taken, not that they offered it, but when I see it in photos now, I know it would be worth serious cash at antique stores now. I'm fairly certain they dumped it.

[dixiegrrrrl]

139. Too bad you could not have given such a precious remembrance to one of her best friends

but I guess a guest room is the next best thing.

I had same problem with my Mom's hutch...had zero room for it at the time and while it was almost 100 years old, would not work for me.
Gave to one of her sisters, who was thrilled to have the family heirloom.

[Jesus Malverde]

113. Let's say something is worth $500

But every time you move you have to pay $100 to move it. After a while the valuable piece is actually a liability.

[LisaM]

31. You're probably right. Now owning "things" is very big right now.

The one that cracks me up is tiny houses. Boy are they going to be sorry in five years when they spent all their money on expensive vacations and now they are living in what looks to me like a glorified playhouse, with no room for books or pots or pans or more than two pairs of shoes.

In fact, the tourism industry is probably fueling this trend.....

[mainer]

32. Agree. Their parents' stuff will end up in antique stores

and worth way, way more than the cheap stuff the millenials are now buying. Sometimes it takes age and wisdom to appreciate the value of old things.

[malaise]

46. Yep

and they will wish they had kept those things which could pay for their grandchildren's college or pay down on the student loans

[LeftyMom]

22. Either I'm wrong about my age or I'm in the wrong house.

Why does this stranger's house have my dad's records, my mom's stained glass projects and my grandmother's china in it? WEIRD!

[LannyDeVaney]

26. Well, I don't fall in the survey (born in '67)

But that 1980-2000 generation, in my experience, is very self-centered and selfish so I can see why they think they don't need that stuff.

Maybe it was always this way, from generation to generation. And as I head toward 50, maybe I'm turning into the "get off my lawn" guy, but I see lots of me-first attitude as a mainstream attitude, whereas when I was younger it was a smaller part of society.

Meh, screw it.

[HuckleB]

36. You're right. It's always the same old transition between generations, for the most part.

Still, it is interesting to some extent. We came out of college in the era of Bush the first's recession, and we struggled, but we tended to do the jobs that available, and found a way to move up. When the economy dumped ten years later, the whining by the young coming out of college was shrill by comparison, as if everyone who had come before them had screwed them over, rather than the fact that the economy ebbs and flows.

Today, I see people the same age as I was when I came out of college, complain because they "don't have enough money to do anything." And then I find that that means they don't have enough money to go out to bars with their friends, and I go back to the fact that I bought a cheap six pack of beer one Autumn, and made it last, drinking a beer only when I really needed it, to get through, and I didn't think the world was ending.

Perspective is bloody important.

[DonCoquixote]

74. yes it is

But do add in that every generation thinks those "kids today" are somehow lazier, dumber and less worthy then they were, and they say that being deaf to the rather nasty insults Grandma and Grandpa uttered about them before they became those nice old people.

What is overlooked is at that a lot of these old things, the china services, the silverware, are relics of a time when the middle class could afford to do the occasional catered party, or other things that meant that the leisure ans space that used to be the upper classes dominion could be shared with joe paycheck. Now, the upper class has snapped the hell back, and has made it clear that they no longer need to pretend that joe and jane sixpack will ever hope to have "nice things." Why give the illusion of a middle class when you can hire the hordes in China and India who will work at wages where they cannot even afford the dog food you buy at Whole Foods? Sadly,the Millennials know that they will not be able to afford a house to put the bulky stuff in, stuff that was made for big houses. They know that wherever they put their money, it has to be played like a chess piece.

Perspective yes, perspective is important, and part of that perspective is that this age is the phasing out of the middle class that the wealthy have been dreaming of. Yes, you had it hard, but if you had to deal with outsourcing, you might not have "found a way to move up."

This is nothing to say anything bad about antiques and history. I myself DO want to keep the things many find insignificant. Yes, that little bit of macaroni and crayon art may seem silly. Well, let me share a personal lesson coming right into my personal life now, as someone whose sister died a month ago. After a loved one dies, and you become the person that the family asks to go through the person's stuff, you will be surprised what winds up having the value you care about. Letters and artwork will beat antiques and the new shiny stuff every damn time, hands down. Granted, so do the films you were able to take because of all these tech toys many hate, stuff that says "Hey, this is what she sounded like, now do you see why I told you you have your aunt's smile?"

Then again, I am also an antique freak, namely because while some of the old stuff was tacky as hell, it was also built to last, and whatever money I spend at an antique shop is less money given to the bastards that sell made in china crap for hundreds that only cost them pennies to make. yes,perspective.

Please keep it in perspective when you tend to think "well I made it, then can/will should make it" because Progress is not a constant, but a fragile thing taken from the powerful by inches, and lost in yards.

[Jesus Malverde]

110. This part resonates

What is overlooked is at that a lot of these old things, the china services, the silverware, are relics of a time when the middle class could afford to do the occasional catered party, or other things that meant that the leisure ans space that used to be the upper classes dominion could be shared with joe paycheck.

[fizzgig]

49. so i'm selfish because i don't want any of the china sets my mom keeps pushing on me?

as renters, we move every two to four years and it's just more breakable stuff we have no room for that needs to be hauled around and stored. if we were settled and had room for a china cabinet, i might take it, but we have no such luxury. i also have almost zero attachment to and little need for many material possessions.

but i'm more curious how it makes my generation selfish because we don't want such things.

[HuckleB]

51. Way to misinterpret a post.

Defensive much?

[fizzgig]

58. well, how do you interpret this?

But that 1980-2000 generation, in my experience, is very self-centered and selfish so I can see why they think they don't need that stuff.

if it came across as defensive (a misinterpretation on your part) it may be because i am sick and damned tired of my generation being shit on by older generations. some of you are respectful of where we are in our lives and our situations, but ffs, i am sick of hearing about how we're lazy, selfish "special snowflakes."

i really am interested in how the poster's assertion that we're selfish has to do with this story.

[HuckleB]

59. Cherry picking is fun!

Nice try.

[fizzgig]

61. are you actually going to respond to anything i have to say?

[HuckleB]

62. Are you?

You went with a classic logical fallacy, and then another. Cut the crap.

[fizzgig]

69. i have no idea what you're talking about at this point

and how about you cut the nasty crap.

i guess you were just blowing smoke up my ass when you told me last week my perspective is valuable and to keep on posting.

[HuckleB]

107. Lol.

That explains a lot.

[LannyDeVaney]

78. Yeah, you are selfish.

[fizzgig]

133. you going to explain how?

or just sit on your high horse?

[RedCappedBandit]

76. Selfish. Lol.

How does not hoarding material possessions equate to selfishness?

Most of us can't afford a house. What are we supposed to do with all this stuff we should be so graciously accepting?

Different world for us. Try thinking from a different perspective.

[MillennialDem]

93. As someone born in 1980, you sound like one of those "damned kids these days" when you say that

[LannyDeVaney]

96. I guess you missed the 'get off my lawn' reference. I admit as much ...

everybody is different. Nothing bothers me. Good luck on not ageing.

[MillennialDem]

97. There's a difference between aging and becoming an old fusspot :p Especially when you're not

even 50 yet.

[LannyDeVaney]

98. Again, please pay attention to my original reply ...

I clearly stated I was not in either age bracket referenced in the article.

I am by no means an old fusspot. But I see millennials everyday at work, and they are much more selfish than my other friends. Maybe I was that way 20 years ago, and my older co-workers thought I was selfish.

However, just based on the past 6 months, I can guarantee I wasn't as defensive and self-righteous.

[Odin2005]

126. Oh look, another Hillary supporter bashing us Millennials.

"But that 1980-2000 generation, in my experience, is very self-centered and selfish"

No, you are just repeating MSM propaganda about my generation's supposed "entitlement".

[JackInGreen]

27. Given housing costs and "the gig economy"

We don't have the storage, if we even have stable housing

[hunter]

41. Sigh. I remember everything I owned fit in my little station wagon. And I lived in there too.

I'm a boomer baby.

My parents moved away to a tropical paradise and left all the family stuff behind with my brother.

He put it all in a big steel shipping container on his little farm.

Later he built a big house and some of the family stuff has migrated into it.

The most important thing is the stories, and stories live in our heads. Any physical items are nice to have around as story illustrations, but beyond any usefulness to anyone, that's all family material goods are. Illustrations.

[SheilaT]

103. When I was VERY young, and first on my own,

every time I moved everything I owned fit into my little VW. After a while, it took two or three trips with that same VW. Needless to say, very many years later, I need to hire movers. And I don't have as much stuff as some people, considering I currently live in a nice little place that is about 900 square feet.

[nolabear]

43. It has ever been thus.

Both sides make sense. Parents want the kids they spent a lifetime loving to think all the stuff they grew up with is special and kids need to be their own people. It's not a good or bad thing, it's just a thing.

[ErikJ]

44. Antiques arent in fashion right now. Minimalism is in.

I just tried to sell an antique roll top desk on Craigslist and I finally had to give it away on "free stuff". I sold about 30 other things on Craigslist for good money but that sucker didnt even get a call.
Minimalism is the big thing right now I think. And that usually means modern mostly.

[HuckleB]

50. Where do you live?

I know many people who would have been all over that, among many generations.

[ErikJ]

55. Portland

Oregon. They love the old houses here but I guess the antiques not doing too well. Maybe its just the roll tops. I think I called a dealer to see if they wanted it and they said theyre not selling right now.

[HuckleB]

57. You went to the wrong places to sell it, then.

I know five or six people who would covet that on a single block where I live in Hollywood.

And, yes, I'm talking about the neighborhood in Portland.

[ErikJ]

72. Well it was on Craigslist for 2 months and no bites.

I started at $300 and kept dropping it as the deadline drew near. Nothing. Solid oak heavy as hell. Meanwhile I sold probably 30 other things for good money. A few other things wouldnt sell either. Just sold my 98 Dodge Caravan today from CL!! Hollywood is a great area. Youre lucky. I lived a mile from there in NE.
I'm going to travel for a couple years in a small motorhome looking for a new place to move to. Maybe even Mexico or Costa Rica. I've been living in the MH for 2 weeks just urban boondocking for free and for the next couple months before I hit the road and I'm already really loving it.

[HuckleB]

109. There are much better places for items like that.

Plenty of antique shops, for example.

[SheilaT]

64. Oh, dear. Ever since I was in my 20's,

and I'm now 67, I've wanted a roll-top desk. Alas, I could never afford one, and now I live in a small place and have absolutely no room for one.

I've resigned myself to the probability that my good china, which I just adore, will probably be lucky to be hauled off to Goodwill when I'm gone. I have two sons, neither has married, and even if they do, what are the odds a daughter-in-law will like that china as much as I do? Not much. In the meantime, I'm going to use it every chance I get.

[TexasBushwhacker]

85. I'm 59 and I used to be fascinated by them

All the little cubbies to put "stuff". But they aren't very practical to use with a computer. The same goes for secretary desks.

[SheilaT]

104. I have actually seen reproductions of those old, wonderful,

Victorian roll-top desks adapted for computers. Sigh. I still don't have enough space to accommodate one of those. At my age it's unlikely I will ever live in a place large enough for one of those, but I still dream.

[tammywammy]

159. Do you have any nieces?

I'll eventually get my mother's China set she got when she married my father (they're divorced). I have a small house, but I'd find room for it. My grandmother picked it out, it's pink with roses. Not something I'd pick out of my mom, but it's lovely because grandma picked it. There's also two sets of silver.

[SheilaT]

161. I do have nieces, two over 30, one over 50.

And a couple of great-nieces. I'm only 67, a long way from giving away my good china.

I should give away a small fraction of the jewelry I own. Nothing is terribly valuable, but it's okay stuff, and might be appreciated by some of the younger generation.

[HuckleB]

48. Aren't "Millennials" rather fond of Vinyl LPs?

Hmm.

[Jesus Malverde]

111. Vinyl is making a resurgence but in new releases mostly...nt

[HuckleB]

112. Actually, there are tons of rereleases, as well.

And most cities see new used LP stores opening regularly.

[Jesus Malverde]

115. My point is the phenomena is not in dads record collection...nt

[HuckleB]

116. A lot of it is, however.

[csziggy]

68. In my family the problem is distributing the stuff from earlier generations

Mom has things passed down from my grandparents and great grandparents and further back. A lot of it no one in my Boomer generation wanted or needed it. I doubt most of my nieces and nephews will want it.

I'm encouraging giving some of the memorabilia to museums - the state archives already have my grandmother's journal of the first year she lived in a mining town in Central Florida that no longer exists. Some of the other things from that era are in the county history museum and more should go there. Some things should go back the part of Michigan where my paternal grandparents grew up - high school graduation programs for the classes of 1907 and 1909 would be of interest to the local history museums, for instance.

I just hope the younger generations don't throw away all that kind of stuff. So much could be of interest to historians in the future!

[Mariana]

91. A lot of those kinds of documents and pictures and such

are being scanned or photographed and preserved in digital formats. You can save a copy of the content for yourself and the family, before you give up possession of the actual physical item. If it's public domain, you can even put it online so anyone in the world who's interested can see it.

It's a real shame the way these things tend to vanish into oblivion, one way or the other. My great grandfather invented a particular tool, some kind of specialized lathe I think, and the Smithsonian has the first one he built, donated by one of his grandsons decades ago. Will I ever have a chance to see it? Not likely - it's not on display and they aren't going to dig it out of storage just so I can look at it. At least old documents, including journals, diaries, letters, and books can be made available to everyone now.

[csziggy]

92. Oh yes - that is what I spend a LOT of my time doing

Scanning the hundreds of photos, thousands of documents and trying to organize them to put online. I've been given all the photos from my husband's family as well as many original documents. I get access to all of my family's and I'm working my way through the piles of negatives and photos. They date as far back as original tintypes, negatives of pictures my grandfather took in France in WWI, glass slides from 1890, etc.

My Mom transcribed grandmother's journal years ago and gave us all copies. I need to call the archive - they were scanning it for me so I could get a digital copy of the original. It was so fragile I didn't want to try to do it myself.

I have an ongoing argument with my sister. She wants to OK the donation with our cousins before we make it final. One of them has our great grandfather's journal and they will not share it. I asked to borrow it for a week so I could scan it while I was in the area visiting my parents and they never responded to that request or to any other email from me since. I see no reason to hand over another family document that will disappear into that side of the family to never be seen by them.

If they want to see grandmother's journal I can copy the digital version to them or they can order it from the state archives. And that will always be available to anyone who wants to see it. The original does not need to be handled or stored in Florida heat and humidity where it will continue to degrade!

[Mariana]

105. Bless you.

Someday, someone will be profoundly grateful you did all that.

[XemaSab]

70. I have my everyday forks

my mom's everyday forks, my grandma's everyday forks, and the silver.

I have my dishes, my mom's dishes, and my grandma's china.

I have my knives, my mom's knives, and my grandma's knives.

I have my table linens, my mom's table linens, and my grandma's table linens.

I have my furniture.... etc.

There's a fine line between nostalgia and hoarding.

I think there's also a generational shift where having a table service for 12 used to be practical, but now? I don't know anyone my age who would have 12 people over for a formal dinner.

[liberal_at_heart]

71. just because an item has sentimental value for a parent doesn't mean it will have sentimental

value for the child. My mother in law collected hundreds of family heirlooms that my husband and brother in law don't want. They will keep one or two mementos, but there is no way they are keeping all that stuff. My father has very few possessions so I will be inheriting a few photos and that's it.

[Laser102]

83. I heard most millennial are either living at home or moving back. They know where the stuff is. LOL

[HuckleB]

114. Exactly. This article is a generalization based on an anecdote.

It's lazy journalism.

[liberal N proud]

86. Our girls don't fit that mold

We have a table that has been in the family for 4 generations, both are girls want it.

[IronLionZion]

87. I don't want it

I don't need much stuff. It really depends on what it is. Some old things are cool or have sentimental value to keep in the family. But a lot of it is just unnecessary for someone who lives in a tiny apartment that is a fraction of the size of my parents' house in the country.

My mom tried to unload a bunch of plates onto me, but there's metal in it so it can't be microwaved.

[ThoughtCriminal]

90. I'm becoming more and more of a minimalist

At 57, I've been trying to get rid of stuff for years. And yes, it is hard, and no, the kids do not want it either.

[Blue_In_AK]

94. I'm almost 70

and still own my mom and dad's Early American china cabinet and service for 12 that they had since they were married in 1955, also some matching bedroom pieces. I did have their drop-leaf dining room table and chairs, but off-loaded it last year to a wood-worker in Homer who really appreciated the quality. I couldn't bring myself to donate to Salvation Army, and I have no idea which of my daughters (if any) will want these things when I pass on. I suspect that they will have some value as antiques by then, especially since I plan to live for another 20 or 25 years. The china, which is a beautiful pattern, is a complete set with no chips.

[melman]

99. Just read this again

and the whole article seems like an excuse for some stealth advertising.

There are embedded links for The Organizing Agency, Potomack Company Auctioneers, Sloans & Kenyon Auctioneers and Appraisers, and Tyler Whitmore Interiors.

All companies that can help you downsize, sell stuff off, etc. All the stuff the article tells you you need to do.

[Quantess]

163. I'm sure you are right about that!

It's a double whammy click-bait article.

First, punch milennials for being spoiled and selfish ungrateful jerks who don't appreciate the quality of yesteryear, then convince the oldsters that they need help getting rid of their precious stuff.

[SoCalDem]

100. This Thanksgiving, we are having a post dinner "trunk opening"

We have three large trunks that have not been opened in over 40 years.. None of our kids want the trunks, but they will have this one chance to pick through family "antiquities" and what they do not want, we will donate/sell/whatever.. Each son will have to tell us precisely what they DO want, so we can cheerfully discard what they do not want.

There will also be a vintage Tupperware giveaway..

[shanti]

150. tupperware

i still have the tupperware salt shaker that i bought when i married in 1974. the marriage is long done, but the salt shaker still does what it's supposed to do! i don't have the heart to throw it away...

[NanceGreggs]

101. This is nothing new.

Talk to any antiques dealer, and they'll tell you that.

My mom and her siblings gave the contents of their parents' apartment to a "junk man". They actually paid to have it hauled away. They didn't want the "old stuff" they'd grown up with. There were pieces of furniture that had been passed down in my grandmother's family for generations. I'm sure the junkman knew an antiques dealer or two who paid him well for his score.

There is nothing of my mother's house that I would have wanted. She was into '50s and '60s stuff - I'm into 1920s-era antiques.

My kids are not interested in my antiques, the ones they grew up with - they're into modern/industrial. I am currently downsizing in anticipation of moving to smaller quarters. Aside from a few art prints and one bronze statue, they have not asked me to hold onto a single thing that they'd like for themselves.

A generation "rejecting" the trappings their parents surrounded themselves with is nothing extraordinary.
In fact, it's to be expected.

[gwheezie]

102. 4 generations of shifting stuff all over the country

My grandmother had a 9 room house and refused to get rid of any of it when she moved into a 3 room apartment so she guilted my mother into take stuff she didn't want. My parents solved that problem when they gave away all their stuff when they sold their house and moved onto a boat. My sister and I drove 100's of miles in uhauls to collect that stuff which wound up with my sister having 2 dining room sets and I dragged a packed U-Haul with the rest of it. My brothers wisely refused any of it. I pawned off a refrigerator and 2couches on my daughter.
When my parents moved from their boat into a condo we tried to give all this stuff back but my mother said she didn't want it.
I kept jewelry, art work and some collectable items and called an auction to come get this stuff about a year after my husband died because he left so many tools and stuff I finally got fed up and passed all this along.
So my great grandmother, grandmother, me and my daughter all dragged stuff around until we couldn't take it anymore. I don't think it's generational.

[pansypoo53219]

106. now, i am not the biggest fan of my MOM's stuff. but my aunt, my paternal grandma, & do NOT get

me started on my acclimation of other people's treasures. i am a born collector. be careful what you do not want. but hey, more left at estate sales for me to grab.

[RKP5637]

131. Estate sales are amazing. I'm always astounded at some of the items that go for

practically nothing.

[MowCowWhoHow III]

108. New Stuff --> Tat/Kitsch --> Antique

Stuff it in storage.

Storage Wars 22nd century!

[Blue_Tires]

117. What about the fuckin' hipsters? I thought they loved retro kitsch?

Last edited Thu May 26, 2016, 09:21 AM - Edit history (1)

And since when were kids born in the early-mid 80s "millennials"? What the hell ever happened to "Generation Y"?

[Jesus Malverde]

118. Gen y are millennials

The media probably changed the term realizing we were coming up on generation z with this construct.

Gen x to me was not related to the letter x. The letter x represented a missing generation in that x was so small. Gen y from that context makes no sense.

[Odin2005]

129. The term "Millennial Generation" was coined in 1991 to describe us 80s babies.

[bemildred]

119. Yep. nt

[Quantess]

120. I have the same attitude as these millenials, and I'm in my 40s.

Do your things own you or do you own your things? It's so much easier to not be emotionally attached to objects. Sometimes a person can be forced to downsize because of hard choices, and having an easy come easy go attitude makes the transition so much smoother.

The article makes it seem like millenials are somehow spoiled and/or ungrateful, wjhich I take a bit of offense to.

[Jesus Malverde]

121. In a culture that values having lots of things, rich people having multiple houses as an example

Choosing to not have things is anti-social or perceived as such. The parents especially feel they are being generous in giving. Kids see the gift as a burden not an asset.

[Quantess]

122. Back when people didn't move so often and life was more static, AND

also, -when things were harder to come by- having posessions was positive.

I'm in my 40s. I'm not a millenial, and I'm not a kid. The article is out of touch. The article acts like this is some new-fangled attitude these crazy kids have dreamed up, and that older generations don't get it.

Well, I get it, because I have had to (also have chosen to) move around a lot, chosen to move to another country, and at other times I have downsized because of economical pressures.

Easy come easy go, for most objects. Luckily for me, I'm not a hoarder. Now that would make life difficult!

[RKP5637]

128. Yep, that is often what happens, "Do your things own you or do you own your things?"

I know that first hand. And the downsizing continues ...

[Quantess]

134. It's not easy, but when it's gone, you most likely won't miss it.

I am really good at accumulating things, and it often takes moving to a new location to separate the wheat from the chaff.

It gets tougher the deeper you go down to the core of getting rid of things you genuinely like and want to keep, but unfortunately are more trouble than they are worth to keep. It hurts, but even so, you probably won't miss it when it's gone.

Photos are about the only things worth keeping in storage, for me.

[RKP5637]

140. Yep, especially the last part, not really missing them after they're gone. What always amazes me is

how little value things are if you try to sell them. I've given tons of things to Habitat and other organizations. I still have so many personal items from my parents and sisters, now all deceased. Photos, handicrafts, diplomas, just all sorts of things. My mother also saved many items from our youth in scrapbooks and all, just tons of stuff, like at least 10 large boxes of it. I guess I just need to dump it. I have none to give it too. It makes me feel disrespectful to throw it in a dumpster, but I need to move on, but it sits for yet another day.

[Quantess]

148. Well yes and no. It's market value.

I'm sorry to hear that you lost so much except your photos

[fizzgig]

136. there are people in this thread calling us selfish

[Quantess]

141. Yeah, I saw. That's silly. They just don't get it.

I actually LOVE antiques, and I appreciate the quality of items from yesteryear. So yeah, I guess that makes me selfish that sometimes I have unfortunately had to turn down items that take up too much space and would end up being a burden.

Sometimes people offer me things they think are great, but are not in my taste. So yeah, I'm selfish and spoiled for having my own style / taste.

[Odin2005]

123. Who wants their parents' hideous 70s/80s furniture?

Shit brown and puke green ain't my thing.

[dembotoz]

130. and then after you dump it. it appears on antiques roadshow for mega bucks

don't it always see to go. you don't know what you got til its gone.

[polly7]

132. I'm just going to give all my furniture away to people I know who need it ...

the rest of my memorabilia and things collected from traveling, etc ..... I'm very lucky to have a niece who absolutely loves anything 'old' and weird. She and I go on drives to explore old abandoned houses and barns and she squeals like a little girl at Christmas when she finds something even I wouldn't touch. But she's the exception. The rest of my many, many nieces and nephews would probably just say "No thanks, Auntie".

[La Lioness Priyanka]

138. probably because most of us live in cities and have no space

probably much more a practical issue, than a deep psychological difference in generations

[Quantess]

143. Exactly. This article really picked a nerve on me, so out-of-touch.

I'm in my 40s, not a millennial, not a spoiled or selfish kid. I'm a person who moves often, who has been forced to downsize, who has even moved to another country by choice, who has had to repeatedly make tough choices about which few possessions to keep and which to get rid of. But doing so helps separate the wheat from the chaff.

The tone of this article irritates me.

[AnnieBW]

145. Hell, I don't want my parents' crap, either!

I've got a storage garage full of Hummel figurines, U.S. Mint Proof Sets, and other assorted stuff from my parents when they died. I got stuck with their dining room set, but only because I needed one. And I'm born in 1964, so I'm technically a boomer by about 1 month.

[Rex]

147. Yeah, because my generation could not WAIT to wear our pop's bell bottoms!

We fought tooth and nail with the other kids over the lava lamp!

Wait...oh sorry, wrong generation.

[Zing Zing Zingbah]

149. This doesn't seem like anything unique to Baby Boomers and Millennials.

I remember my grandma trying to give my mom (who is a boomer) shit she didn't want too.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

151. I'm a Boomer, and when my mother and stepfather (both born 1921)

broke up housekeeping, they tried to give stuff away to my brothers and me, and we either already had it or live a different lifestyle.

I don't need three full 12-place-setting dinner sets or dishes and utensils for every purpose, because that's not the way I entertain.