American technology wins again...

[brooklynite]

This Is a $250 Warm Lube Dispenser

We’ve all been there. You’re trying to get intimate and you need some lube, but it’s cold and that totally ruins the sexy vibe you’re going for. And that’s why you can buy lube and lotion warmers for about $25. Or you can pay 10x as much for one that’s a bit prettier.

This is the Pulse, a $250 lube warmer and dispenser absolutely no one ever asked for.

The Pulse plugs into your wall and then uses its own specially designed lube pods to offer the best lube experience you could ask for. Or so the company claims.

Now, if you’re paying $250 for a lube dispenser, you might think that you could use any lotion or lubricant you want. You would be wrong. Like a Keurig, Nespresso, or that stupid Juicero juicer, the Pulse needs its own proprietary lube pods to work. You get nine lube servings per pod and a package of 6 pods clocks in at $25.

[HassleCat]

1. At least it does something

Unlike the eighty dollar rock.

[brooklynite]

2. $85...

It's all in the pricing.

[shadowmayor]

3. BOHICA

Given the serious scroggin' coming our way, lube might be the answer. The tRump version dispenses sawdust and gravel for maximum discomfort, at a nice $999.

[HassleCat]

5. BOHICA indeed.

Only the rich will be able to afford KY jelly or Astro. The rest of us will have to use Ben Gay.

[Afromania]

9. LOL

oh man, I'm dieing here.

[angrychair]

4. It going to be a essential item

As we are going to get fucked a lot for the next 4 years. No furniture shopping required.

[briv1016]

6. If you have a warming lube dispenser on you nightstand and no alarm clock...

[Midnight Writer]

7. Wow! I am already getting tired of winning!

[Afromania]

8. This is why we can't have nice Science.

No NASA funding for you. Instead all the brains have gone to work for companies creating new ED meds. So that we can create new bebbies at 75.

[longship]

10. IKEA has the same thing, but they call it a SLUPIZ (assembly required).