I'm going to do a LinkedIn page listing myself as a Presidential Pardon Writer

[MineralMan]

and start a blog on the same subject, I think. I'm pretty sure Trump's going to need one of those, and I want to have a good Google ranking for that search. I could use the gig, frankly.

[LOL Lib]

1. Ok

[Blanks]

2. With a specialty in pre-emptive self pardoning?

[MineralMan]

3. Good idea. I'll work that into my content.

Paradigm Pardons, LLC

How does that sound? Impressive, eh?

[Blanks]

8. It does sound good...

But coming up with a list of satisfied customers could be a challenge.

[MineralMan]

10. Well, I already have Ford on the list.

The pardon I wrote for him about Nixon was freaking brilliant, I tell you. That was one of my early jobs, see. Tremendous pardon. Beautiful, I tell you.

[True Dough]

4. With the level of "extreme vetting" the Trump administration applied to General Flynn,

you have no worries of them detecting your MineralMan DU identity either!

[MineralMan]

5. Well, just to be safe, I'll probably use another alias.

You never know what he might Google. How about:

FreeTrumpForever

Terms will have to be cash on the barrel head, though.

[True Dough]

6. "FreeTrumpForever" works

So does "GoldenShowersFascistPowers"

That might get you noticed sooner, actually!

[MineralMan]

7. Yeah...too long, I think. It needs to have his name.

He's so vain that he probably types Trump in every Google search. Psychology, you know. Smart SEO at work.

[Hekate]

9. Go for it, MinMan! Cash only from these grifters, though...