How Cats Used Humans to Conquer the World

[Calista241]

Sounds about right.

From The Atlantic:
https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2017/06/cat-domination/530685/

Sometime around the invention of agriculture, the cats came crawling. It was mice and rats, probably, that attracted the wild felines. The rats came because of stores of grain, made possible by human agriculture. And so cats and humans began their millennia-long coexistence.

This relationship has been good for us of course—formerly because cats caught the disease-carrying pests stealing our food and presently because cleaning up their hairballs somehow gives purpose to our modern lives. But this relationship has been great for cats as species, too. From their native home in the Middle East, the first tamed cats followed humans out on ships and expeditions to take over the world—settling on six continents with even the occasional foray to Antarctica. Domestication has been a fantastically successful evolutionary strategy for cats.

[jeffreyi]

1. My cat takes personal credit for this.

[MineralMan]

4. As does every cat that lives in a house.

They know their power. They have trained us well, as have our canine masters. We do their bidding willingly.

[MineralMan]

2. Absolutely. The domestic cat is by far the most

successful member of the entire cat family. They evolved to interact peaceably with humans and have thrived to an extraordinary degree. Dogs did a similar thing, by domesticating humans to serve their needs. Survival of the fittest at its best.

[geek tragedy]

3. self-domesticated means not domesticated at all

despite the many thousands of generations of breeding and living as domestic companions, they retain all of their instincts to hunt, kill and survive. The cats in our apartments and houses are little, if any, different than those who wandered into huts back in the day.

[MineralMan]

5. Really, the only adaptation they made was to allow

humans to touch them without getting clawed. In exchange, we house them, feed them, and pet them when we are allowed to. They have domesticated us, rather than the reverse.

[geek tragedy]

6. indoor living is also an adaptation for them.

they typically like to roam and explore.

[MineralMan]

7. I think, perhaps, the interiors of our homes

provided them just enough space to explore. We moved a cat from California to Minnesota that was an indoor/outdoor cat who had a cat door always available to her. Here, we decided to make her a permanent indoor cat. She adapted just fine to that situation, and never even attempted to go outside again.

I think the smaller cats have a relatively small territory that is normal to them. A house, with all of its complexity and area to explore seems to suit cats just fine. I know that there is no spot in our house with a full basement that the cats have not investigated.

[geek tragedy]

8. they also can make do with apartments--our three do.

they also periodically try to escape out the door (I think just to see what's out there)

[3catwoman3]

11. We have 4 indoor cats. Any closed door is a challenge...

...to them, regardless of how many times they may have been in the room with thte closed door.

My husband has a workshop for his model airplane hobby. It is closed all the time, to keep the cats from wreaking havoc with all of the airplane parts, tools, paints, brushes, decal sheets, etc. All cat parents know how our critters loved to knock things off flat surfaces - they would be in cat heaven in that room. They have been in many, many times, under supervision, so it is not a place they haven't seen.

Nonetheless, any time the door to that room is opened, there they are, eager to get in as if they had never had a chance before.

[Raster]

9. Excerpts from the Dog and Cat Diaries...

EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DIARY

Day number 180
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day number 181
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day number 182
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!

EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DIARY

DAY 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.

DAY 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair ... must try this on their bed.

DAY 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan.

DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.

DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer". More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...

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This has been around in various forms for years... still find it funny.

[Calista241]

13. That's been around for awhile.

I still laughed out loud when I read it.

[Raster]

14. That's why I posted it...

...because I still get a chuckle whenever I read it, and it has had MANY iterations and formats. Also seemed germane to this thread.

[NobodyHere]

10. We taught cats how to knead

[marylandblue]

12. Difference between how dogs and cats think

A dog thinks: these people take care of me, they feed me, they keep me warm --they must be gods.

A cat thinks; These people.take care of me, they feed me, they keep me warm -- I must be a god.