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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsMy 70 year old SIL with Dementia (Medicare & Medicaid)
She was diagnosed 2 years ago with Frontal Lobe Dementia. Her brain is basically disintegrating, which will eventually kill her when it affects her involuntary basic functions.
My BIL quit his job in his 70's to stay home to care for his (2nd) wife. No Pension or Health Insurance except Medicare. Her son quit his job and moved back to live with them to help his Step-Father care for his Mom. He is pushing 50 himself.
Their only assets are their home and a 10 year old car. Almost nothing in the bank. Fortunately, they have a Cousin who is an Attorney. What should we do? First thing, he told them was to put the house (only asset) in her children''s names, then apply to Medicaid. They got her, lot of cajoling at time, to do that, and with the stipulation that their Stepfather could live in the house for as long as he lived.
My SIL has gotten worse in the last month and had to be admitted to the hospital, but they cannot cure her. She is on an IV and oxygen. The hospital wants her to be transferred to a Nursing Home. She is very much unresponsive, but the prognosis is that she could live a month, or she could live a year. They just do not know.
So what happens now, if Medicaid is cut back, and she lives for longer than a short amount of time under Trumpcare? Where does she go? Family can no longer take care of her. DIE? The hospital does not want her. There are no assets that insurance can steal from.
We saw her last week and my husband cried his eyes out for is Sis. We both feel so sorry for our BIL. A mid 70's man should not have to worry about medical finances for his wife, in addition to all the stress he has been under taking care of her.
In her moment of clarity she said, "I want to be with my Mommy and Daddy in Heaven." How can ANY human being not want to break down in tears with that? FU, heartless Republicans.
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SHRED
(28,136 posts)Humans are just in their way.
I'm sad for your family.
I'm sad for mine.
I'm sad for this planet.
50 Shades Of Blue
(11,391 posts)
cilla4progress
(26,525 posts)Sickening. Your family members do not deserve this. This could happen to any of us. I hope you find a peaceful resolution.
iluvtennis
(21,497 posts)
Scarsdale
(9,426 posts)thinks this only happens to working class people. THINK AGAIN Saint Ronnie ended up with Alzheimers. I despise the entire group, plus their orange "leader" the large Orange Mistake.
elehhhhna
(32,076 posts)Your cousin is a bad lawyer. The state WILL audit their assets and claim some house money. Giving it to the son hasn't worked for 10+ years.
The husband has to right to live in the home ad long as he likes. Someone needs to consult a lawyer here...
HockeyMom
(14,337 posts)It was basically "sold" to all of them. If you want to sell your house to your children you can. I sold my car to my daughter for $1. Cannot do that?
My Mom did pretty much the same with me, Only Child. No real property, but she put her bank account in a joint account with me, and her safety deposit box also, and I had the key. She told me, before she went into the hospital, to take everything out which I did. Nobody ever came after me, any more than they can for children's own assets, not related to an Estate.
My SIL does not own the house now. Her CHILDREN own it. There is no Estate.
Purveyor
(29,876 posts)that time frame and they can come back for $$ from those that received the assets.
There are some exceptions for cases of hardship but you really need to consult an attorney that knows these laws inside and out.
Google "Medicaid asset recovery"...
HockeyMom
(14,337 posts)New York. There was a window where they had to transfer ownership of the house. I think he said it was a 5 year time period. My husband and his sister inherited the house from their Mom. He paid her his share of it, before she married her second husband so he was not an owner of the house. She had sole ownership.
This is why it had to be done right away with Dementia diagnosis, and to get her to agree to it while she still was able to have the capacity to sign it. I believe her physician had to sign a statement too. Her son's POA and Health Proxy also had to be done in this time period. It was very rushed, but again, they had a family member attorney to advise them.
My Mom's situation wasn't the same. No "real property" involved. She went herself to her bank and signed all the papers for a joint account and I just cosigned them and she got me a key. Mom had Cancer. Different situation.
Hopefully, all this is legally taken care of. The bigger problem now is what is going to pay for her nursing home if she is cut from Medicaid.
Ilsa
(64,368 posts)but I believe the shorter ones have been lengthened over the decade or so.
smirkymonkey
(63,221 posts)I hate the republicans for what they are doing to people and for what they propose for the future. What becomes of patients like this under their new plan?
I have to wonder if physician assisted euthanasia is going to become an issue again. What do they propose to do with the elderly and terminally ill if they can't afford to be treated or even have access to a hospice where they can die painlessly and peacefully?
Will they make families suffer along with the ill patient until the bitter end? I can only foresee what horror this "health plan" is going to wreak upon families in the future.
Again, my condolences for you and your family. I am truly sorry for what you are all going through.
sharedvalues
(6,916 posts)So sorry for your family's situation.
My sister is also on Medicare with no assets and in cancer hospice. If she was diagnosed 5 years younger, ineligible for Medicare, she might have gotten no treatment under Ryancare and died two years earlier, robbing her of two good years she spent with her grandchildren.
Moostache
(11,179 posts)The sick thing is that your story is going to be one of MILLIONS...not a few dozen or a hundred or even thousands, the GOP is going to kill MILLIONS of people in the next decade...and for what? Tax cuts? I hope every last one of them choke to death and do it soon...
virgogal
(10,178 posts)In MA it's five years.
It's complicated.
I'm elderly and my condo can go to my kids (if I go on Medicaid) because I put it in a trust 10 years ago.
benld74
(10,285 posts)Prayers to your family
csziggy
(34,189 posts)If not they NEED to. I am not sure how the rules for hospice and Medicaid work but there are major advantages if on Medicare.
I am not an expert but when my Dad was dying and only had Medicare for coverage the Patient Advocate at the hospital advised us to put him in hospice care. He was already in the Palliative Care Unit and there was no prognosis that he would survive more than a week.
We selected a hospice group that worked with the hospital so that Dad did not have to be moved. They intervened to make sure that he got all the medications he needed to not be in pain and to be at ease.
The main reason we did that was that under Medicare with no supplemental patients have to pay 20%; when in hospice care that 20% is covered so that is no cost.
Hospice can be done in a hospital, in a specialized facility, or at home. It depends on the particular organizations. My uncle who had a stroke and lingered with partial consciousness for almost two years had hospice care at home for that entire time. My BIL who had pancreatic cancer and who didn't give up to the very end had arranged for hospice care at home but only lasted four days after he realized he was near the end. Hospice still helped my sister with the care and with the final arrangements as well as with grief counseling for her and for their four children.
Check into hospice and see how they can help with costs and with simply the practical aspects of what your family is facing. The information here might help: https://www.medicaid.gov/medicaid/benefits/hospice/index.html
Sorry - meant to say, my thoughts will be with you and your family. I hope they can get the help they need. 
Hekate
(100,133 posts)csziggy
(34,189 posts)And so caring.
Even my MIL who never used hospice was impressed with their loving attitude. My husband's family had arranged for hospice if she needed it for the final stages of her COPD and selected a nursing home because a particular hospice group worked with them. As it turned out her final illness was mercifully short and she never went into that nursing home or into hospice care.
Hospice groups do so much good.
HockeyMom
(14,337 posts)but this is in NYC so I am sure that is going to take time. It has been over a week and they cannot get a "bed" for her anywhere. Still in the hospital.
csziggy
(34,189 posts)But the only case I was actively involved with my my Dad's and he was already in a bed.
I hope they can resolve this soon. I will be sending good thoughts your way.
mopinko
(73,726 posts)hospice is amazing. it will relieve a huge part of the burden.
best of luck to you all.
and fuck these cold hearted, greedy assholes.
mountain grammy
(29,035 posts)I've been called a horrible person for saying an entire political party wants people to die, but they do.
Ilsa
(64,368 posts)It is already painful to see a family member go through this, and then experiencing how it affects the rest of you. Then the state and their restrictive financial rules are like getting an ice pick in the eye and a poker through the heart.
What also burns me up is that middle class and poor people have to grovel for care for a dignified passing, but the multimillion dollar assholes have the nerve to squawk about "the death tax."
NJCher
(43,165 posts)but grovel for work just to afford to get through retirement.
First they cut off the jobs by shipping them overseas, and now with this program they cut off any way of getting through the end of life.
But Google image "sociopath brain image" and you'll understand. They really are different than the rest of us, and their peculiar characteristics are an asset when they go for a power position.
Cher
Hoyt
(54,770 posts)Also, at some point Medicaid will be forced to pay family members something to keep relatives at home vs. institutionalization. That will save some money and help families to afford taking care of relatives if they want.
The several years before ACA ends and Medicaid cuts kick in gives us an opportunity to elect Democrats. Question is will we take advantage of it or just yell and whine for the next critical years.
I hope your SIL finds a good balance. Went through this with my FIL and it ended up pretty much killing my late wife.
marybourg
(13,640 posts)advice was wrong, useless and harmful to the husband. Lesson: if faced with nursing home and unable to self-pay, see a certified Elder Law Attorney, not a friend or relative who doesn't practice in that very small, arcane area.
roamer65
(37,953 posts)Most states will pass this type of legislation in order to keep the nursing home industry afloat. Some already have it. Would not surprise me if the GOP scumbags pass it at a national level.
When Medicaid drops out of the picture, children and close relatives will then become financially responsible for nursing home costs of loved ones. That is the way they will defeat any trusts or wills.
I also expect that most nursing homes and assisted living will require at least one relative to co-sign for financial responsibility.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Filial_responsibility_laws
If it passes, I will definitely be talking with an attorney.
roamer65
(37,953 posts) sheshe2
(97,626 posts)My dad had the same and Medicaid helped him live out his last years in some comfort.
Peace to you and yours.
HockeyMom
(14,337 posts)for her, and others down the road, with Trump and his ilk.
hamsterjill
(17,577 posts)My family is going through a situation with a family member with cancer.
I am so sorry that this has happened to your family. It's not right. It's so horrendous to witness suffering.
I have no magic words. I have no answers. I just wanted to extend some love to you and yours. We aren't Republicans. We care about one another. Please know you are not alone.
Trust Buster
(7,299 posts)The logic there is that the patient would have been a burden on Medicaid much sooner had a caregiver not have been present. The patients primary physician must attest to this fact. The paperwork required by Medicaid is burdensome. Four years of bank records alone. Don't put off collecting the required documentation. My problem is just the opposite. My mother just passed from dementia. I was her sole caregiver for 8 years and, therefore, the house was exempt from the Medicaid drawdown. Now that she has passed, my greedy Right wing, FOX viewing, "Christian" brother who lives on the other side of the country and who did not care for my mother a single day is chomping at the bit to kick me into the street so he can sell the house. A house that only exists because my 8 years of sacrifice saved the house from Medicaid's grip. Right wingers are utterly RUTHLESS human beings who place money in front of empathy. It is a mental illness IMO.
The incidence of dementia/Alzheimer's is expected to double with the aging of the Baby Boom generation. Palliative specialists refer to this coming increase as the "silver tsunami". What better time to make ridiculous cuts in the Medicaid program.