Borowitz: Girl Scouts Obtain Restraining Order Against Trump

[ehrnst]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In an extraordinary rebuke of the President of the United States, the Girl Scouts of the U.S.A. have obtained a restraining order against Donald J. Trump.

The order, which the Girls Scouts were granted on Monday night, prevents Trump from coming within three hundred feet of any gathering of the Scouts’ organization.

Carol Foyler, a Girl Scouts spokesperson, said that while the G.S.U.S.A. sought the restraining order “out of an abundance of caution,” the girls themselves were “in no way, shape or form” afraid of President Trump.

“They’re prepared to deal with bobcats and bears,” she said. “They can handle a malignant narcissist.”

Trump wasted little time responding to the Girl Scouts’ action, lashing out at the organization in a blistering early-morning tweet storm.

“Failing Girl Scouts bad (or sick) guys,” Trump wrote. “Mints, cookies terrible. Sad!”

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/girl-scouts-obtain-restraining-order-against-trump

[FSogol]

1. Failing Girl Scouts bad (or sick) guys, Trump wrote. Mints, cookies terrible. Sad!

[Gothmog]

2. I love good satire

[Wounded Bear]

3. Yeah, but they should probably do this for real...

[uponit7771]

19. +1

[FakeNoose]

4. Satire - The Borowitz Report - very funny

[politicat]

5. Satire, but seriously, GSA should strongly consider it.

We know he engages in predatory behavior towards young women. We have evidence. It's in our girls' best interest to do so.

[CrispyQ]

6. "Mints, cookies terrible. Sad!"

[VaBchTgerLily]

7. OMG! this POTUS is the biggest blistering ASS!

[dalton99a]

8. Smart move

lol

[Ilsa]

9. Do it! Do it! Do it! nt

[LittleGirl]

10. LOL eom

[DesertRat]

11. Andy Borowitz is great!

[calimary]

12. Andy Borowitz!!!

[smirkymonkey]

13. Excellent!

[Proud Liberal Dem]

14. They actually should do it

for safety reasons, if nothing else.

[nycbos]

15. Don't know weather to laugh or cry.

[mountain grammy]

16. Fantastic!

[ananda]

17. Lol

I was a Campfire Girl, but I relate.

The lady next door led the Cub Scouts for her son.
I used to watch them in their uniforms doing Cub
Scout stuff in their backyard.

I think some of my brothers were Cubs too.

It was all so innocent and cute.

Not any more.

[Motley13]

18. Funny, well really sad, LOSER 45 would be sizing them up for dating or whatever

[lpbk2713]

20. I almost took this seriously.

Because I have grown to expect anything where this asshole is concerned.