The Onion: "Blissed-Out, Hemp-Wearing Sean Spicer Assures Reince Priebus...

[Miles Archer]

...This The Best Thing That Ever Happened To Him"



http://www.theonion.com/article/blissed-out-hemp-wearing-sean-spicer-assures-reinc-56524

DELRAY BEACH, FL—Inviting the recently fired White House chief of staff to take a load off and embrace his newfound freedom, a blissed-out, hemp-wearing former press secretary Sean Spicer reportedly assured Reince Priebus on Monday that leaving the White House was the best thing that ever happened to him. “Seriously, man, that place was toxic—after I got out of there, it was like this huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders,” said the serene, baja-hoodie-clad former spokesman, offering Priebus some of his homemade kombucha and his copy of Alan Watts’ Become What You Are while assuring him that leaving the Trump administration would allow him to find a sense of tranquility and spiritual reconnection. “I take long walks now. I read. I meditate. Remember how flustered I used to get? The other day, someone totally screwed up my lunch order, but I didn’t even let it get to me. Trust me, you’re going to look back on this as the day you rediscovered yourself. Welcome back, brother.” At press time, Priebus was attending a silent meditation retreat in Bali, waiting for the echoes of Donald Trump shrieking at him to finally subside.

[Gothmog]

1. I love the Onion

[VermontKevin]

2. Somebody better go wash their Mustang.

[MiddleClass]

3. 1981 Trans Am Turbo NASCAR pace car,

I owned one for decades, love the car, love the technology.

Biggest factory basket case that could not handle shity crappy low octane fuel available at the time.

down draft carburetor on the vacuum side of the Turbo, crippling fuel separation issues.

1 minute bat out of hell, next rolls over on its self. When computers, senses, detonation pulls timing.

Spent decades researching trying to fix – failure

required fuel injection, which wasn't original.

Also owned a 87 Mustang 5.0 GT convertible with 33,000 miles for decades.

Was there for the whole 50 race

[smirkymonkey]

4. LOL!