****Official DU Rapture Thread****

[Kaleva]

Post here about people who were raptured during the eclipse. But let's keep it real and only post about folks you actually witnessed being raptured. Keep the 2nd and 3rd party accounts to fake news sites.

[Floyd R. Turbo]

1. One of my socks was raptured! I just emptied the dryer and one is missing! 😢

[ADX]

3. Post of the day! LMMFAO...

[Cirque du So-What]

4. Must have been...

the hole-y one

[demmiblue]

9. Ha!

[Floyd R. Turbo]

15. 😂

[True Dough]

54. All of Floyd's socks are hole-y

Otherwise he couldn't get his feet in them!

[malaise]

30. DUzy

[bluecollar2]

49. not raptured....teleported

Appeared in my laundry hamper this afternoon....

[AwakeAtLast]

66. Now Dobby is free!

[hlthe2b]

2. Left behind in Northern Colorado... 96% coverage, but still not enough to make it even remotely

dark. Few clouds in the sky, so if you didn't know something was going on and had glasses in hand, I doubt one would even look up.

Still, through my much valued eclipse glasses, it did look good at maximat coverage (11:46 AM MT)


PS, I put my precious pup in the basement, just to be sure. Better go check to see if she was raptured... Dogs are the BEST of us, afterall.

[OriginalGeek]

7. Ha, yeah

I like to think I'm pretty good but I'll never be as good as any dog I've known.

[Warpy]

26. Got pretty dark for about 15 minutes here in NM

They're all still out there, so the rupture was a bust around here.

[madamesilverspurs]

32. Didn't have the glasses,

so I watched the people watching the eclipse from the Safeway parking lot that was nearly devoid of cars. It wasn't dark out, but it was a kind of murky weird light. Anyway, turns out that an eclipse is a great time to shop, no lines at the checkout, woohoo!

I was in NYC during an eclipse in the '70s, couldn't get over the people standing in the streets and looking up at the sun, many without any kind of eye protection. And quite a few of them walked into walls afterward.


.

[marylandblue]

5. I always feel enraptured at astronomical events

[alfie]

6. My dog disappeared for about 15 minutes.

She followed me outside, I turned my back and she was gone, just like that...gone! I looked everywhere. Neighbors hadn't seen her, nothing. I drove around looking for her, came back and there she was. Said it was not exciting enough for her to stay so came back. Sigh.

[sunonmars]

14. My wingnut Trumpy neighbour across the road just came back from the store,never been so disappointed

[alfie]

24. Totality has come and gone.

Should have lasted longer, the diamond ring effect was awesome! Unfortunately my Trumpy neighbor was still out there. Can't get a break.

[Kaleva]

8. Gnashing of teeth! Rendering of Garments! Thick cloud cover has moved in!

Clear skies an hour ago. Bummer.

[mwooldri]

10. About a few minutes ago the call center here got empty.

Now there is some suspicion that they're outside at the (rainy) eclipse viewing party. But they could have been raptured.... Who knows? All I know is going to be busy with just me answering the phones...

[cwydro]

16. You're not in Ballantyne, are you?

I know that call center lol.

[mwooldri]

20. Nope, Prime Credit USA. I'm Peggy.

[cwydro]

28. There's a bunch of call centers in Ballantyne in Charlotte.

I used to work at one of them.

[underpants]

11. A towel at the pool mysteriously started flipping and rolling around - no wind

About an hour ago

[sunonmars]

12. Have any of the A-holes left yet.....or when can we expect the excuses for God not turning up.

[cyclonefence]

13. SO LONG, SUCKERS

[DURHAM D]

17. I am following a new Mercedes that has a bumper

sticker that says "This car will not have a driver when the Rapture comes"

Just a few minutes until Totality. Not sure how to make the title transfer on the Mercedes once they disappear. Maybe the "abandoned vehicle" thing will work.

[kcdoug1]

18. I Was raptured!!!!!

probed and immediately returned.... assholes!

[Renew Deal]

19. lol

I remember the rapture madness from a few years ago. Still laughing about that.

[Lunabell]

21. Please rapture the whole entire gop.

I wish they'd just leave the planet to those of us who actually care.

[riversedge]

27. +1

[southerncrone]

52. +1000

[nolabear]

22. Well, I was 91% raptured.

Honestly, it was freakin' awe inspiring.

[freddyvh]

23. darn

some of my neighbors didn't go

i am pissed

just saw one at his mailbox wearing his MAGA hat

[Angry Dragon]

37. you only get raptured if god wants you

[NCjack]

42. My keys disappeared. I was convinced that they were raptured, but my wife found them. nt

[womanofthehills]

61. If god wants you - but what if you are indoors?

Be prepared:

[Angry Dragon]

62. VERY NICE

[hamsterjill]

25. I"m still here. Where the hell is Jim Bakker?

n/t

[Mr. Ected]

29. I think I ruptured a little bit, maybe in the vicinity of my spleen

Luckily it didn't hurt and it was over in a couple of minutes.

[IronLionZion]

31. Our president's brain has been raptured

which explains a lot about him. Not that he needs it.

[wryter2000]

33. I was raptured

I'm speaking to you sitting on the other side of Jesus from God. I have to say the internet connection is really fast up here.

[Solly Mack]

34. Nobody got raptured.

[SCantiGOP]

35. I'm in heaven now

It's all true; I've been reunited with my foreskin.

[rurallib]

40. did it recognize you? Just reattach itself?

can't wait until I get mine back

[keithbvadu2]

36. Doomsday ministry scrubs end of world predictions from website

http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2011/10/28/doomsday-ministry-scrubs-end-of-world-predictions-from-website/

Doomsday ministry scrubs end of world predictions from website
.

[Donkees]

38. My cheese is missing

[SCantiGOP]

60. did you buy that...

...at Cheeses of Nazareth ??

[NCjack]

39. I know this guy who died last night. It's so close that I'm counting him. 1 raptured! nt

[Hassin Bin Sober]

41. Jesus h Christ we're still here !!!

https://m.

[Sancho]

43. Damn...I'm still here in Florida!!

...maybe we'll have a hurricane next week take aim at Mar A Largo...

[Danmel]

44. On my way home to New York from South Carolina

Witnessed totality which I have to say was truly awe inspiring. Wasn't raptured but it was rapturous.
I actually cried when it went dark.

[sarisataka]

45. Still here, didn't make the cut...

I'll bring home some flowers to the Mrs and see if I can get raptured tonight.

[MLAA]

47. Double your odds, bring chocolate too

[sarisataka]

48. Good idea

[MLAA]

46. I witnessed a bag of Lays clasic potato chips get raptured

[world wide wally]

50. We had a 6 pack raptured...or something.

[LanternWaste]

51. A nice distraction from the daily "Trump Administration Setting Scenario To Declare Martial Law",

A nice distraction from the daily "Trump Administration Setting Scenario To Declare Martial Law", "when will the left/right civil war begin?", "when will Democrats be deported to another planet" type posts I read in GD every day or two.

[bottomofthehill]

53. the ever important Rapture index

http://www.raptureready.com/rapture-ready-index/

[liberalmuse]

55. My beer was raptured during the eclipse.

An entire can!

[jpak]

56. I was hoping the over-ripe cat litter would be raptured

But no - my man sins......

[Roy Rolling]

57. Fair enough

More science than religion here at DU. But Republicans have made Christianity their "brand" to the exclusions of all other faiths---including atheists. And that's why we call them bigots, close-minded, and morons.

If Democrats want to make Atheism their "brand", then democrats will suffer the same rejection by reasonable people as Republicans have with their religious cheerleading for their favorite religious faith.

I just want religion OUT of my political party and why I caucus and support democrats. I want *all* religions out, and that includes Atheism and atheistic sympathizers. The thread is hilarious, but think about it. Do we want to become just like Republicans and cheer a specific brand of religious faith?

[Doreen]

58. Damn it! I was hoping the rapture would have taken the Orange buffoon.

He is still here....damn it.

[Best_man23]

59. My wife and I "raptured" a bottle of wine

Sadly, it didn't come back full again.

[AngryAmish]

63. Did not get raptured, did get drunk and ate cucumber sammies.

Eclipse beach party with the beautiful people. Seriously, most people on the beach were beautiful. My fat drunk ass stood out.

[Amaryllis]

64. Never heard "rapture" turned into a verb before! I like it.

[raven mad]

65. We didn't lose many - it was too cloudy.

I am willing to bet Bible Baptist Church (who are NOT Christians - they believe like sTrumpet, only when it suits their agenda) is still pretty full, too.

When it stops raining, I'll go check out the area, see if there are cars or motorcycles left over from those who went.......... also, if their cabins are intact? Y'all come on up! Free rent!

[L. Coyote]

67. Three of my zucchinis are no longer in the garden. That can't be coincidence. Three of them.

Link to tweet

Link to tweet

Link to tweet

Link to tweet

[parkia00]

68. Went to the toilet....

It was big and it hurt.