I am losing my memory.
I can't drive anywhere because I get lost and that panics me. I make lists and keep a big calendar where everything gets written down as to my drs. appointments. My kids are going to have to plan our downsizing and the sale of my house and our move to assisted living. The very thought of such a huge undertaking is daunting to say the least.
We do have a house cleaner who also does my grocery shopping and I depend greatly on her. My husband is recovering from back surgery and at present can only drive a few blocks but not to dr.'s appts. So I call a cab or get someone to take me. I have a lot of caring and concerned neighbors. I have to help my husband with his bathing and I am making meals. Today I forgot to get him his breakfast.
I'm having an ultrasound next week to determine whether I have a fatty liver. I have stopped drinking alcohol as that could be causing the problems with my liver.
So I am reaching out to you folks. If I am not making sense in my posts, please understand. My hands shake so much that it is hard for me even to type. I depend on my DU folks for online friendship. I'm having difficulty understanding what is happening in the world of politics and you are all so helpful.
Thank you all.
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I'm glad you have help from your kids, neighbors, and house cleaner. It's such a tough transition from complete independence to relying on help from others, but thank goodness that help is there for you. Many many hugs to you.
Finding out what the cause may be--no matter how difficult, is clearly the first to tackle. Then you can do the things possible to address or treat it. Telling you to try to stay calm and not focus on the "worst" you can possibly imagine might seem like asking the impossible, but I hope you can try. There may be a LOT of medical explanations for what you are experiencing and many are readily managed/treated.
I know everyone of your DU family will watch for your posts and updates as we send you the very best of wishes.
to you every hour of every day!
Write down that your DU friends are here to support you.
I hope that your transition to assisted living will be a godsend and make your life so much less stressful than it clearly is right now.
by the way i didn't catch a single typo in your post.
there are legions of us 
...and go easy on yourself too. This must be really frightening for you.
I'm bookmarking this so as to remain aware.
Never be afraid to ask here for help, reminders, explanations. Over and over again if need be. I think DUers would understand and help as much as they can.
Second, my husband, who is the other half of me, has MS and is also struggling with some memory issues. It scares him, as it must scare you. I think you have good people around you, and a lot of people here respect and admire you.
For what's it's worth, I understand.
Never be afraid to come here to DU to express your fears or thoughts. We will stand with you through thick and thin, and will not judge you for any changes or confusion.
I hope you are being checked out for more than your liver. There are some meds that might help.
Surround yourself in your family's love and help.
You're doing a great job communicating.
I'm so sorry this is happening. Thank goodness you have kids and neighbors who have your back. It will all work out with your house and the move. A lot will be taken off your shoulders so you can concentrate on day to day life with your dear hubby.
..... 
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Online friends are the only reason I got through it.
It sounds like you are handling it the best you can by making lists to help you do what you need to do. Your family, friends, and neighbors are helping you out, too. It's terrific that you have that support.
Whenever you need to chat or tell your troubles to someone, there will always be somebody on DU to listen. Please don't ever feel like you are burdening anyone here because you're not.
Much love & empathy & good vibes to you, my friend. My husband and I are getting up there ourselves.
Getting old is definitely NOT for the faint-hearted! You do not struggle or face this alone.
And btw, your writing still looks great and totally coherent to me!
I always loved your art history posts. I do hope your daughter gets them published.
You are beloved at DU and have many online friends here. Please keep us updated on your progress, even if you make some typos! We just want to hear from you.
Love and prayers.
We are here for you.
One challenging aspect to memory conditions that isn't discussed as much is having fun. We all need to and it's especially important to be able to relax in a stress free environment when there are so many additional stressors in daily life.
In the 90s, a man in the Netherlands started holding Alzheimer or Memory cafes. They are gathering places for people with memory issues and their partners or care givers. They are held anywhere from cafes to churches to museums and provide a nice space to socialize with others who understand the issues you are facing.
They have become so popular that they are in many cities now.
Here's some info about these:
http://www.memorycafedirectory.com/what-is-a-memory-cafe/
Here's a directory for the Northeast:
http://alzlive.com/resources/community/memory-cafes-northeast/
Info here:
https://www.moma.org/momaorg/shared/pdfs/docs/learn/GuideforMuseums.pdf
Sometimes these are listed under Alzheimer's resources, as with MOMA, but can be helpful for anyone with memory issues and their partners, too.
This might be a way to combine your interests, by having an art aspect and being around others who share that passion.
From someone who really appreciated your art posts, even if I seldom posted in them.
loving thoughts to you. Looking forward to you posting for a long, long time!
we are here for you.
That must be frightening.
I'm glad you have support around you,
hang in there.
Lots of hugs in this thread, and I'll add one more
I am so sorry you are going through all of this, but I am so amazed and admire your openness and courage in facing it. Sharing what you are going through may help someone else out there suffering alone with similar problems.
you have an involved family and circle of friends. Take good care of yourself and hubby.
someone in an online environment is that you cannot give them a hug and a shoulder when they're in real life distress.
Please know that many, many people have you in their thoughts and care deeply about you, even across this electronic gulf.
The list of people who have made DU suck over the years is long, while the list of those who made it great is much shorter. Be assured you're on that second list.
hang in there.
We are all here to help.
Get fresh rosmary - infuse, add a lil fresh mint and sip like tea.
That would improve things dramatically no doubt!
Hang-in there ... you are tough CTYankee!
We're here for you. 
I'll have them more pronounced than at present, when names and words are my sometimes problems. My mother was memory-impaired at my age, so there's no reason to believe I'll not have the same difficulty in the future.
A post here on DU last week asked "who was the oldest geezer" on DU. I believe I was that one, though I deleted my post, as I said I would, because I believe many of the younger folk, not just on DU but in general, tend to disregard the thoughts and opinions of us seniors.
You have a very full plate - normal home routines, plus physical care of your husband, plus preparing for a move from a home long lived in. A friend of mine, preparing her move from a two-floor townhouse to a smaller condo, advised me, still in my over-large for me one-floor- "Let your kids do it." I'm beginning to think that is good advice and will happen, regardless of my intention to downsize and not have a yard, which I surely don't need.
It's good to hear from you, and I hope you will continue to keep in touch with us on DU, as we've come to know and welcome your thoughtful posts, including the art history, which was always a delight.
In addition to the good words offered here by others, the only thoughts I'll add are to remind you to be kind and loving to yourself and to know that you are loved by your own family and your family here on DU.
and I would hope that your memory of that caring does not ever fade.
Many of us remember reading and looking at your excellent art essays and always looking forward to the next one. You have brought happiness and knowledge to so many and that is quite a legacy. I wish you well and do not worry about tipos. I mean tpyos, oh hell, you know what I mean. 
))
I know what you are experiencing is scary.
Remember that you don't have to be perfect. In fact, you don't have to be anything but yourself. People will understand any slips more than you think they will. Don't be too hard on yourself...all you can do is the best you can.
I have been reading this forum for awhile now, but posting only recently. I can tell you that people here will provide some good support. Also, don't be afraid to depend on others in your real life.
Everything is going to be alright. I'll say it again...you don't have to be perfect.
Smile often, think of things that give you pleasure, and fight the good fight.
best for you. I always enjoy your postings. Always know all of DU is with you!
It's hard enough to have a husband needing your help, but to know you are losing the ability to help makes it especially painful.
My husband has recently been diagnosed with the second most common form of dementia, Lewy Body Dementia. It's been
described as Alzheimer's meets Parkinsons. Symptoms of both, yet not fully either one. Comes and goes. Very difficult to diagnose
as it's essentially defined by a constellation of symptoms, and only finally diagnosed on autopsy, as there is no definitive "test"--
like blood or MRI or CAT scan--for it.
I hope you both can make the move to assisted living as soon as possible so that you both have the support you need. Just knowing
that there will be help for your husband is bound to reduce the stress on you.
We are here for you.
Sending you a cyberhug.
Your art essays were one of the best things about DU. We're all here for you.
I have had to hide my father's car key...
it's been really hard for me to cope...I'm not coping actually
I suffer from essential tremor meaning I shake for no reason. There is no cure and it will increase with age, much like your memory loss. Some people focus more easily when smoking cannabis so it's definitely something you wanna look into. Yui and I wish you the best of luck!
So So sorry to hear of this situation. You know we're with you, in Paris or home!
EKG!
That displeases me!
But I AM glad to hear you're not in denial and you've set up a smart plan of action.
It's good to know that DU is full of smart, caring people. You needn't worry about posting here. I know you'll get friendship and whatever advice and help we can give.
An idea for your husband---try writing what you want to tell him? Seems that would be helpful. Gestures also help to make yourself understood.
I'll have to find your art history essays! I'd love to buy a copy of your book too!!!
Should I just pm you?
❤️
I was touched by your post. Any of us can end up in the same boat. I hope things go as smoothly as possible for you .
It's not easy to deal with these types of losses. I'm glad you have family to help you plan. Since you shared info on one of your posts about your situation in this downsizing phase. You are surrounded by so many well-wishers, active supporters, both in tangible life and through the energy currents!
I send you love and best wishes dear CT,
I look forward to your future posts, and I thank you for this one.
Because of you're great love, here you are.
Loved. Remembered. Cherished.
I hope you always know this great truth til the end of times...
We're here for you.
One of the best of us....
I'm new here and not very fluent in English.
I' sorry to hear what happens to you.
I suppose there is nothing much to do, unless reorganize the way you live and get as much help as you can.
I don't know if it can help you a little, but curcuma is known to be effective in memory problems.
It will probably not solve the problem, but maybe help a little?
I send you all my best toughts and wishes from Belgium.
CTyankee, America would be incredibly better off. And no, it's not another worrisome symptom -- America really has gone politically crazy. Only the wackos are sure they know the way. 
Transition from your old lifestyle must be hard, but you'll settle into new routines and be able to truly relax into the things you enjoy again.
powerful healing vibes I can CTyankee! The best to you and your family.
Glad to see another LOOOng post from you...
Everybody else has said everything I could say... and have said
(Cy Twombley -remember?) YOU got me back into art.
Anyhow, for what it is worth, the English in your posts here is absolutely perfect!
Maybe it is difficult for you to write it that well. I don't know but...that says something BIG.
Question--
Can you, just sitting in a chair for example, eyes closed, imagine driving to the grocery store, every physical motion you make---- starting with getting your keys, walking out the door, getting in your car, starting it, pulling away, turning the wheel, brake at the stop sign, looking left and right, left turn, whatever, etc etc.. until you reach the store and then parking.
OR perhaps the same exercise to a simpler destination.. like-- around the block?
Did you ever hear the term 'kinesthetic imagination?' Keeping it simple, it is part of the FELDENKRAIS practice of re-training the connections between the brain and the body--- something like that.
Maybe this doesn't apply to your situation. and I am just off base, I don't know. BUT, it has helped me with certain things, mostly reorganizing the neurological connections between my brain and my left hand. And it helped Itzhak Perlman when he was a child in Israel with polio.
So I started wondering.....just maybe......
All the best, as always...
...I really like the lists and action plans.
Keep in touch.
We do understand; many of us are paddling our little canoes right along side you. Getting old brings a lot of fear and heartache.
Your art posts were a highlight for me, and I miss them!
I'm sorry to hear you are going through such tough times.
I have always enjoyed your posts and you have always impressed me as an educated, articulate person - and still do. However, it must be very frightening for you and I know you are already going through so much with your husband. Please know we are thinking of you and sending you loving thoughts. And please fall back on us when things get tough. We are here for you.
