Proof you CAN'T kiss the president's ass and tweet at the same time:

[kpete]

Link to tweet

Link to tweet

Link to tweet

[Jeroen]

1. Presideent Trtump - I like that

[Dem_4_Life]

10. LOL Perfect name for him.

I LOVE THAT!!!

[wryter2000]

15. Sounds like a toothpaste

Presideent, for fangs that are whiter than white

[GopherGal]

26. I think he misspelled Trdump

Pronounced Turd-dump

[Thomas Hurt]

2. You really need two hands to make sure you are not kissing the crack.

[lunatica]

3. Fat fingers typing thought from his fat head.

Or maybe just two sheets to the wind...

[LudwigPastorius]

22. He could have been having a stroke.

[MineralMan]

4. He must be using a flip phone, with a number pad

you have to tap the right number of times to get characters. Either that or he is an illiterate moron.

Either way, he's an awful person.

[NastyRiffraff]

21. Drunk. Don't forget drunk. Or high.

Even with a flip phone, what he did was bizarre. You do have to tap the right number of times to get the right character, but he still had too many characters, not just wrong ones.

[Kaleva]

34. That's how my phone works. I hate texting with it.

While the cooler kids are engaging in rapid fire conversations, I'm trying to send out "LOL".

[MineralMan]

35. I just tell everyone that I'm an old geezer and don't text.

That works pretty well. Actually, I do text, but would rather not get into texting conversations with most people. I'm actually pretty good at texting with the number pad, and can do it without looking. I learned that back when that was the only way to do it. I'd rather not, though, so I tell people I can't text on my phone.

[Solly Mack]

5. Oh, yeah. His grasp of the issues is about as strong and your grasp of spelling.

[underpants]

6. Ooh that WAS a burn

[grantcart]

14. epic

[BigmanPigman]

7. That sounds like covfefe to me.

[progressoid]

8. I drink my covfefe stgroing.

[Duppers]

9. Perfect burn!

Newt's is trying to sell shit by the bucket in a sewage plant.

[unblock]

11. epic burn!

[smirkymonkey]

12. Oooo! That one's going to leave a mark!

Touche Ramzy!

[dalton99a]

13. His head is deep in Trump's ass and his nose is growing

[question everything]

16. Thank you for the laugh

All of you. I needed this

[sandensea]

17. Pee + President equals Presideent

Makes sense to me.

[justhanginon]

18. This presideent's specialty is grabbing not grasping.

As in, " I can grab etc.,", well you all know, not much sense in repeating the well worn phrase. It is after all rather disgusting, especially having come from the now presideent of the United States.

[ejbr]

19. Combine the content with the typos

and we have to agree he was high

[Achilleaze]

20. "abandoned in the hospital" How republican is that?

Totally republican

[question everything]

23. Just in case some are not familiar with Newtie's history

this is what he did to his first wife (first of three).

[Alice11111]

24. No wonder that the Repubs ran him put of town.

[lame54]

25. Maybe he was getting blown by his secretary

[renate]

27. wow, Ramzy Nasrallah!

That was PERFECTION!!!

[BHDem53]

28. Amphibians are

rermarkably stgroing spellers.

[IronLionZion]

29. Siri, how to do I turn on autocorrect?

Or voice to text.

I bet dipshit's unprecedented idiocy drives a lot of people to pills and booze.

[JHan]

30. .....

[BobTheSubgenius]

31. "Now, when I say 'deep and growing...'"

"...I mean that we are pretty sure he is aware that issues exist."

[Bengus81]

32. Maybe that mistress of his from the Lewinsky days was giving Newdy a big ole' BJ at the time...

You know,the one he DUMPED his cancer ridden wife for?

[niyad]

33. thank you for sharing!!

[czarjak]

36. You know you've arrived...

When you get the Newt endorsement.