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Sun Nov 12, 2017, 04:49 PM

Is this song rape culture?

Tis the season where you can't walk into a store without Christmas music playing. When grocery shopping today, "Baby It's Cold Outside" came on. Looking at the lyrics in modern context, it is about date rape.

This was the first time this year I've heard it and listened to the lyrics closely. She keeps saying no and he keeps using the weather as an excuse for yes.

What's your take on the song?

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Response to crazycatlady (Original post)

Sun Nov 12, 2017, 04:50 PM

1. Sounds like he is trying to get a some sex, seducing her to stay and she is not sure.

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Response to crazycatlady (Original post)

Sun Nov 12, 2017, 04:51 PM

2. The answer is no (but baby, it's cold outside)

 

Absolutely

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Response to crazycatlady (Original post)

Sun Nov 12, 2017, 04:51 PM

3. I remember listening to it a few years ago and thinking...wow, this is actually kinda creepy

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Response to crazycatlady (Original post)

Sun Nov 12, 2017, 04:56 PM

4. Context is everything

Depends on what she is wearing....just kidding.

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Response to crazycatlady (Original post)

Sun Nov 12, 2017, 04:58 PM

5. Yes, it is.

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Response to crazycatlady (Original post)

Sun Nov 12, 2017, 04:58 PM

6. It's all about seduction between two consenting adults

IIRC, it's the man saying he must leave and the woman saying he'll catch his death of cold if he does (altho more poetically put). Or maybe the other way around. It's persuasion, not coercion.

There's seduction...and courtship...and mating rituals... throughout the animal kingdom.

Not everything is about rape.

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Response to Hekate (Reply #6)

Sun Nov 12, 2017, 05:39 PM

13. "Say, what's in this drink?"

Sure sounds like he spiked her drink, so, yeah. Definitely rape.

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Response to crazycatlady (Original post)

Sun Nov 12, 2017, 05:08 PM

7. It's certainly "heavy pressure seduction culture".

Which sadly is a subset of rape culture, but when women like my grandmother were taught and vocalized to my mother, sister, and I that "boys will be boys, it's the woman's duty to put up the stop sign or whatever happens is her fault too" -- she was referring to pregnancy -- and men are praised for how many notches they have on their bedpost....

It's not surprising that high pressure "seduction" is considered okay. And people vary on what they think is "high pressure".

Take, sadly, the Takei Stern tape. Things might be different with a guy because they do have one primary erogenous zone where women have others that people generally go for first before going for the genitals (unlike Trump), but he admitted to starting/continuing stimulation without asking if he thought the person was just shy and essentially expecting to be told no firmly if it was truly unwanted, vs asking first.

But culturally women have had the "duty to say no and be virtuous and perfect" and men have been supposed to overcome the "virtuous refusal" in order to be successful in reproducing. How long has that bit of patriarchy contributed to sexually aggression genes being added to the pool, given we have prized female virginity for at least 2000 years?

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Response to crazycatlady (Original post)

Sun Nov 12, 2017, 05:11 PM

8. You know Christmas is coming when this song/debate comes up once again!

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Response to crazycatlady (Original post)

Sun Nov 12, 2017, 05:17 PM

9. Ive always thought it had a date-rape vibe to it.

 

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Response to crazycatlady (Original post)

Sun Nov 12, 2017, 05:28 PM

10. Yes because "the answer is no"

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Response to crazycatlady (Original post)

Sun Nov 12, 2017, 05:32 PM

11. Not again.

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Response to crazycatlady (Original post)

Sun Nov 12, 2017, 05:38 PM

12. "Say, what's in this drink?"

A little rohypnol, maybe.

Yup, I've thought that for a long time.

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Response to crazycatlady (Original post)

Sun Nov 12, 2017, 05:41 PM

14. compared to today's music where women are all bit**** and H** nt

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