I lost my mother, and it's even worse than that.
I recently lost my mother. She was 82 years old. Went quietly in her sleep. She had arthritis which was debilitating, but was otherwise in good health. Sadly, her body was not discovered for quite some time (my brother ad I both live out of state, I'll explain later) and there was no autopsy possible, and she was forced to be cremated due to the decomposition of her body. I'm still struggling with this, and always will.
To give some background, my mother in her later years unfortunately became a Faux News addict. To be honest, she was never really what one would call a "well informed" person. She started watching Faux News in her last few years, believing that made her well informed, and we found her always wanting to fire up political debates with everyone, something she had never done in the past. Mostly railing away at liberal media bias, and hating democrats, because Faux News tells her to. Would start trying to pick fights out of nowhere at times. I would calmly and methodically point out things like Medicare and Social Security, which of course she heavily depended on, were brought about by democratic administrations and opposed by republicans including her demigod Ronald Reagan. Told her if it were up to Reagan, she would have no medicare. Whenever I gave her a calm, factual retort like that, she would just stammer, sort of red faced, realizing she was wrong, and say nothing. Then later on after some passage of time, would continue with democrat bashing, as of course Faux News told her to.
So recently, her oldest granddaughter, my niece, went to study overseas for a semester, in Spain, where she is now. Which did not sit well with my mother as Faux News got her so wound up about mid east terrorist attacks in Europe that she was so certain that sending her granddaughter overseas was a sure death sentence, as she sure to be killed over there by those terrorist muslims. Then the Barcelona attack occurred, which made things worse. Of course this caused a lot of acrimony with my brother and his wife, as she did not merely express concern over the situation, she kept insisting in a heavy handed manner, never letting go of it. It reached a boiling point with my brother and his wife, naturally. So over Labor Day weekend, I made the trip to visit her, which I normally did every year. We had a nice time, but at the end of the weekend I had to have a talk with her, as to how she has to stop this intrusiveness, how she's being overbearing and overstepping her bounds, as her granddaughter could just as easily be victim of a campus gunfire attack a la Virginia Tech as she could be killed by a terrorist in Spain, and she has to stop with the constant hand wringing. Then of course she responded with anger at me, for "taking their side" and the like. My attempt at enlightening her was going nowhere, so I left, told her I loved her and we'll talk later, and she ignored me as I walked out.
So then there was phone silence, calling neither myself or my brother, as was not uncommon for her when she went into one of these types of rants. We figured it was just another bout of poutiness, and would smooth over by the holidays. This was not at all uncommon for her, phone silence when there was a family blowup. Very common for her, in fact. Turns out she was not calling because she passed away in her sleep, unbeknownst to any of us. We don't even know what day she died, probably around the first week in October. This is why her body was not discovered until later. My ugly Labor Day conversation with her was to be my last.
So now it's Thanksgiving. It was always "our day" between me and mom. My brother, as per tradition, spent the holiday with his in laws, as some holidays are with the in laws, some are with family. So Turkey Day was always just me and mom. This of course is the first one without her and it's tough. My mother was a good hearted person, involved in Al Anon and Alateen, voluntarily counseled females in prison, was great with small children, used to be a school teacher long ago. Just a pity Faux News poisoned her mind in her later years, and caused such issues and bad blood in the family. This Thanksgiving Day is a hard one for me, and I had to vent, and could not think of a better place than here.
RIP mom. I love you.
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I lost my mom this past September. It has been a rough, rough year, and I mean all things considered.
My heart goes out to you.
Mom. May all the good memories overcome the sad ones.
there's always someone else who has things worse. At least my mother had a long life. Wish I had words for you that could help...
if that is ok. i gave up tv news in the year 2000. gave up cable completly last july.
So very very sorry...
My 39 year old son died in August from Muscular Dystrophy. I was with my mother when he passed, alone. I never thought I would not be there for him.
We can't predict the future and we can't be everywhere. Know that your mother and you shared a bond to be cherished.
I'll bet many others have separated over the brainwashing of Fox so-called news and hate radio. It is causing nothing but misery, hate, and divisiveness.
Sincere condolences to you and your family.
For your mom, a light for her passage.
May your mother RIP.
beat you to the punch. 
thanks for your thoughts
Please see my post to Orleans.
The Slavic/Czechoslovak people place a setting and chair at the table for the 'unseen' but 'present' reposed.
Our church sets a place for 'all' who have reposed for the Christmas Eve Vigil service and repast after.
We hold that a person's spirit is alive after they repose, and that the spirit is the true being/essence of their human/mortal life.
The peace that passes understanding come and dwell with you.🕯
~sprink
i'm very sorry you are going through this.
it sounds like a very devastating experience.
hold tight to the love you have for her and the love she had for you. i believe that is what keeps us together across the great divide.
after my mom passed i started setting a place for her at the table for all the holidays and special occasions, as a way of remembrance, and welcoming her to join us--after all, there was no other place she'd rather be on these special days than with me and my daughter. we even continue to celebrate her birthday with her favorite food and a cake. and today, when i go to my daughter's home, there will be an empty chair and place set at the table. it has become a tradition based in love and the belief that our spirits never die.
i hope you find some comfort today and in the days ahead.
that you had a disagreement with her that might have been easily patched up - it's clear she was a good woman, with the work and volunteering she did - if her passing away hadn't happened just then. It's awful that Fox made her think there was a 'side' to take on the subject of your niece's travelling, and that it divided a mother from her children.
I hope you'll remember you have plenty of friends here for Thanksgiving. 
You have nothing to feel guilty about, if you feel any guilt. When it's time, it's time. She was gone. It no longered mattered to her when she was found. She could just as easily have mentioned to a few neighbors to check on her, if they didn't see her for a while. But we never think we're going to die.
She went in her sleep. Who doesn't want to go that way? She was lucky.
I feel for you having to spend the first turkey day without her and your special day with her. Thanksgiving has a special painful meaning for me, too. I can tell you that I do not make arrangements to do anything on that day for the purpose of avoiding the painful reminders. I think it's important to feel the pain, so that I can get better. It does get better over time. Inch by inch, day by day, year by year.
My Dad is 86 and is a Trumper and Faux News watcher, too. I will almost never discuss politics with him, though he tries to draw me in, sometimes. My stepmom, his wife, is a Trumper and Faux News devotee, too. They are both so incredibly ignorant of facts...because they watch Faux News to get "facts." There is no hope for such people, politically. They became lost when they voted for Trump. He, in turn, refers to me as the "treehugger" in the family. He means it as an insult, but to me that's a compliment. (Reminder to self: Get a t-shirt that says "treehugger."
But we can only try to compartmentalize our family members who are political idiots, and focus on the good stuff. I hope you made it through the day okay. It will get better.
