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Sun Jul 22, 2012, 05:17 AM

God Delays Title Transfer Of Earth To Meek Yet Again

HEAVEN—In a statement released today God, the supreme being and creator of the universe, confirmed that he has once again postponed the transfer of the planet Earth to the meek.
Representatives of the meek confirmed that, to date, they have not inherited anything. Gustavo Barros, 67, a blind, homeless man from the slums of Rio De Janeiro, read a statement prepared by the group. “At this time we are, unfortunately, still poor, hungry, and downtrodden,” said Barros. “Moreover, based on the lack of response from God to our repeated inquiries, we're fairly certain that for the foreseeable future, the Earth will remain in the control of the powerful interests that seek to maintain the status quo.”

The news came as a great relief to the non-meek, everywhere. “When they announced that release I started getting really nervous,” said Joel Quinlan, 50, a Connecticut hedge fund manager worth over $7 billion. “I was like, ‘Uh oh. The jig is up. The meek have inherited the Earth and I’m probably going to lose my yacht.’ But it turned out it was just a false alarm. I was so relieved I bought myself another yacht.”

Many non-meek questioned the meek’s ability to manage the Earth, were they to inherit it. “I don’t think these ‘meek’ should be running things,” said Yousuf Qureshi, 33, a Somali warlord who has killed over 400 people. “They are not proactive enough.”


http://smew.com/all-feed/item/2306-god-delays-title-transfer-of-earth-to-meek-yet-again.html

10 replies, 2234 views

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Always highlight: 10 newest replies | Replies posted after I mark a forum
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Reply God Delays Title Transfer Of Earth To Meek Yet Again (Original post)
Ichingcarpenter Jul 2012 OP
cantbeserious Jul 2012 #1
Ichingcarpenter Jul 2012 #3
Warren DeMontague Jul 2012 #2
eliminerlesud Jul 2012 #4
hobbit709 Jul 2012 #5
IdaBriggs Jul 2012 #6
zeemike Jul 2012 #7
99th_Monkey Jul 2012 #8
Tierra_y_Libertad Jul 2012 #9
Ichingcarpenter Jul 2012 #10

Response to Ichingcarpenter (Original post)

Sun Jul 22, 2012, 05:40 AM

1. Maybe The 1% Are Blackmailing God

eom

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Response to cantbeserious (Reply #1)

Sun Jul 22, 2012, 05:49 AM

3. In older news

US president Ronald Reagan champions a compassionate campaign to resupply the freedom fighters in Nicaragua with machine guns, C-4 plastic explosives, and other humanitarian weapons that they so desperately need in their struggle against literacy, teachers, health clinics and agricultural co-operatives.

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Response to Ichingcarpenter (Original post)

Sun Jul 22, 2012, 05:47 AM

2. "Well, I'm glad they're getting something, 'cause they 'ave a 'ell of a time"

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Response to Ichingcarpenter (Original post)

Sun Jul 22, 2012, 06:03 AM

4. The meek shall inherit nothing

 

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Response to Ichingcarpenter (Original post)

Sun Jul 22, 2012, 07:21 AM

5. What earth the meek inherit comes in 6 by 2 foot plots.

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Response to hobbit709 (Reply #5)

Sun Jul 22, 2012, 07:28 AM

6. .....

 

Where is the "Like" button? Powerful statement.

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Response to Ichingcarpenter (Original post)

Sun Jul 22, 2012, 08:11 AM

7. Why do you hate America?

Jesus never said that the meek would inherit anything...that is a liberal lie made up by the liberal media.
What he really said is that the meek will never inherit the earth because, well they are meek and the strong and aggressive are those who god really love.
That lie was created by the communist socialist Marxist to confuse us all.

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Response to Ichingcarpenter (Original post)

Sun Jul 22, 2012, 02:50 PM

8. This is the funniest thing I've seen in a long time. Thanks for sharing ~nt

 

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Response to Ichingcarpenter (Original post)

Sun Jul 22, 2012, 02:54 PM

9. On advice from his banker and Tim Geithner.

 

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Response to Tierra_y_Libertad (Reply #9)

Sun Jul 22, 2012, 03:43 PM

10. I no longer have to connect the dots.

but we must be kind to those that don't

Ignorance is bliss but I'm blistered.

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