Japanese boy missing in mountains after being left by parents as 'punishment'

[Liberal_in_LA]

Source: Cnn

Rescue teams are searching for a seven-year-old boy missing for two days on a mountain range in Japan, after his parents abandoned him "as punishment."

The area near Nanae-cho, Hokkaido, in the country's north, is known to be home to wild bears.

The boy, Yamato Tanooka first went missing at around 4 p.m. local time (3 a.m. ET) on Saturday, according to a spokesman for the Hokkaido Prefectural Police.
He said police had received an emergency call from his parents at around 6 p.m., and were initially told that the boy had gone missing while on a day trip to the area with his parents and sister to collect wild vegetables.

The parents later admitted to police they had left the boy alone in the mountains while on the way home to punish him for throwing stones at passing cars and people.

The boy's father suggested the family had hesitated in reporting him missing because of the circumstances surrounding his disappearance.
"I was not able to ask for (a search) with a reason of punishment," he told TV Asahi. "I thought it might be taken as a domestic violence."

The parents immediately drove back to where they had left Yamato, but he was no longer there, according to the police spokesman.

Read more: http://www.cnn.com/2016/05/30/asia/japan-boy-woods/index.html

[Feeling the Bern]

1. I see the Japanese have really interesting punishments, just like Koreans and the Chinese

Someone did the same thing on Huangshan a few years ago with a five year old boy who talked back to the father. They dropped him off on the mountain and told him to find his own way home.

[Chemisse]

2. The family's hesitance in reporting that they had left him there

Suggests this is not generally acceptable anyway.

[Bonobo]

5. To think that that represents some kind of prevailing Japanese attitude is so wrong.

If a couple in Alabama tortured their child and I responded something about how Americans have interesting forms of punishment, that would be about how your response sounds to me.

[IronLionZion]

11. This is NOT reflective of those countries cultures

abusive people and bad parents exist in every country

[Feeling the Bern]

13. When you live in China like I do and read weekly stories like this in China Daily

you tend to think otherwise.

Don't tell me about a culture in a country you've never lived. I lived in Korea. I own a house in China. I am currently in Malaysia. I've been on this continent 10 years.

But I know to Americans that means shit. As I have been told, just because I live there and speak the language fluently and married a Chinese national doesn't mean I'm an expert. Someone who spent a week in Hong Kong/Shanghai/Beijing/Taipei in a hotel knows more than me.

But don't let me attempt to convince you. Your mind is made up.

[IronLionZion]

24. Thank you for understanding that I'm American!

People ALWAYS think I'm from some country in Asia for some reason!

[Bonobo]

26. Well you don't know shit about Japan, kid.

Wouldn't surprise me about China though. They run over 2 year olds and leave them in the street.

[enlightenment]

34. Which gives you a deeper understanding of

of cultures you mentioned.

Unless you are reading weekly stories "like this" coming out of Japan - and perhaps you are, you didn't specify - then lumping all Asian cultures into the same box is not really appropriate.

I understand your frustration, but I also suspect that you understand it isn't wise to assume that all Asian peoples and cultures are the same. I'm not criticizing your experiences, just suggesting you step back from a broad-brush statement that doesn't serve you well.

[Feeling the Bern]

36. What broad brush? I mentioned China and Korea (two places I've lived)

I mentioned Malaysia, where I live currently for the next six-eight weeks.

I didn't lump all Asians together. Where the hell did you get that?

[enlightenment]

39. Perhaps from the OP?

Discussing a Japanese family, in Japan?

[Feeling the Bern]

50. Broad brush? All conservatives all the same?

Look, I have been in East and Southeast Asia for ten years living here. How long have you been here?

Face facts. . .what the OP reported is more common than you care to accept. If it's a broad brush, so be it.

[Bonobo]

51. At some point, adults like myself

that have been living in Asia for half of their adult lives (I am now 50) stop saying "I know so much about this country because I speak the language, dude!" and admit that there is as much diversity and complexity in it as anywhere else and that a large part of it is still obscured to them.

Bragging as you do is, in my long experience, a sign of green-ness.

[saltpoint]

23. Agree. Parenting styles differ, sometimes by

a lot, across many different cultural settings and circumstances. Very often right on the same block in a given neighborhood.

This one story from Japan has an eerie Hansel & Gretel feel to it. We don't know for sure that the kid was throwing rocks at cars. He might have been. He might not have been.

I hope authorities there do a thorough interview with mom and dad. And not least I hope the kid's found ok.

[AllyCat]

14. Because Americans never "punish" their kids inappropriately.

[Feeling the Bern]

16. Never said Americans are blameless. I'm talking about my neighbors here in Asia.

[The2ndWheel]

28. Yeah, but you never even mentioned Americans

If you don't say Americans can also be horrible, people can only assume you don't think Americans can also be horrible.

If people in another country do something good, you don't mention Americans, because what do Americans have to do with the specific thing you're talking about? What, do you think the world revolves around America? If people in another country do something bad, you have to mention Americans, because stones and glass houses. What, do you think America's shit don't stink?

[Feeling the Bern]

29. When Americans do shit wrong, I say it. But you think what you want, Sunshine.

[The2ndWheel]

37. Sorry, I was agreeing with you

Last edited Mon May 30, 2016, 01:44 PM - Edit history (1)

The way I wrote what I wrote sounded better in my head.

[Person 2713]

30. Hey it's all over the world . Dishonor deaths , some church in the US killed a teen for disobeying

the church by beating him, there are deaths for inter racial dating, premarital sex
Beatings of little toddlers to death in the paper every week . You see a form of inappropriate child rearing in your surroundings but it expands past your own eyes unfortunately. You were not raised in the culture so it will not all compute,no matter how lng you have been there it is not your culture and perhaps it is easy to broad blanket what is not the way you were raised and condemn the sum total of child rearing as abnormal and savage.
This mountain abandonment was inappropriate and I am sure most in Asia will not be shakin thieir head and saying yep the kid deserved that punishment really don't care about your refute for all I know you would do the same here with some ethnic or minority community . I see comments like that all the time how all black parents or all Muslims and they know because they live near them blah blah
IMO if this was norm they would not have hesitated to call the cops, although I agree it was probably as much about saving face
In The US after a lot of child or wife abuse deaths there is a claim the child went missing or was abducted , that is a pattern in the world I am surrounded by or sometimes it is about insurance money here and they are found dead after a rouse of false abduction
I do not believe this is the case in the Japan story
Asia has no hold on entitled brats go to UAE or in the US,Entitled brats like the affluenza teen in the papers in jail to 12 yr old ganbangers shooting people in the head oh and the becoming ever more popular in the US mixing guns and toddlers ,. 20 times more likely to be killed in unintentional shootings than their peers in other high-income countries, that's just toddlers and that's not counting when they shoot an adult
No place is perfect and it is not the entire culture that would put their kid on a bear mountain and walk away
Grass is always greener somewhere else and people are strange when you are a stranger IMO

[mainer]

33. The fact this incident made big news indicates it is rare

and not accepted. No one bothers with "dog bites man" stories.

If it happened all the time, no one would bother to publish a news story about it.

[Nitram]

45. First of all, such a punishment would shock the average Japanese person.

Secondly, I'm sure quite a few parents have tried to scare their kids in a similar way, but most had the good sense not to leave the kid alone too long.

[Chemisse]

3. My parents were always threatening to do this when I was a child.

In fact I recall we once started to drive away without my troublesome brother once, but just got a few yards, then stopped.

It's a practice meant to terrify, something that was acceptable 5 decades ago, when parents were expected to be harsh with their kids.

[Rhiannon12866]

4. How awful! The poor little kid!

[Divernan]

6. A 7 year old throwing stones at strangers & passing cars?

His parents have been making poor parenting decisions most of his life, apparently, if he ended up that disturbed at age 7. I recall not only my 3 kids at that age, but also their friends and the groups of kids I worked with in Brownies & Cub Scouts. Kids are so sweet at 7 years of age. Hope there is some family protective service to check out how the daughter is/has been treated.

[Chemisse]

8. Even kids with perfect parents can be brats, especially on long, boring family trips.

And throwing rocks has always been a temptation for kids.

They may be terrible parents (and leaving a kid at the side of the road to teach him a lesson is a very bad choice, if only for the terror and insecurity it causes), but having a child be bratty is not an indictment on their parenting.

[Divernan]

12. Oh, come on! Throwing rocks at people/passing cars?

That is way beyond bratty! Bratty is starting to scream in a restaurant because you are bored, you are cranky because it's hours past your bedtime and nobody's paying attention to you. Bratty is running up and down the aisle in a movie theater your parents dragged you to because they wouldn't pay for a babysitter. Bratty/cranky behavior is very often the result of parents putting kids into difficult situations. Don't take the toddler to do the weekly grocery shopping during what should be their naptime.

Children have internal clocks when it comes to mealtimes. If they normally have their dinner at 5 p.m., don't take them to a restaurant at 7 p.m. If their bedtime is at 8 p.m., don't drag them to the 7 p.m. movie. And parents who give in to a temper tantrum just to get the child to be quiet, only reinforce repeated temper tantrums.

As to the rock throwing, when a kid is 7, they are small enough to be physically controlled, i.e, (1) take the rock(s) away; (2) explain the injuries/damages which could result (a 7 year old can easily understand this); (3) keep a close eye on the child & if he/she attempts to do it again, end the excursion, put the child in the car and go home.

A lot of kids don't like the restraints of car seats/seat belts. Maybe they have a temper tantrum. This does not excuse the parents from exercising control. It's called being in charge. It's called responsible parenting.

"Oh, but some 7 year olds are gigantically big . . . . may be the parents are frail." Just anticipating the next reply by someone determined to excuse the parents' actions or lack thereof.

A thrown rock could cause very serious physical injury to a person, not to mention distracting a driver and causing a crash.

Do you honestly think that if this child's actions had taken someone's eye out or caused a car wreck, a parent could go in court and whine, "Well he was just being bratty. He's like that. There's nothing we could do." And some kindly judge would say, oh well, now that you've explained it, the victims can just eat their damages - case dismissed!"


All that being said, who is to say these parents are telling the truth. Maybe the little boy did NOT throw rocks. Maybe they were angry at him for something else - like he wet his pants. Or spilled a drink in the car.

The parents are at fault here any way you look at it.

[Chemisse]

31. I like to give people the benefit of the doubt.

Unlike many people, who just salivate at the chance to lash into total strangers. It makes them feel superior.

I prefer believing that people are basically good and doing their best - until proven otherwise.

[Divernan]

35. As a NIMH research fellow, I co-administered parenting workshops.

So I do know whereof I speak. If an informed, experienced, professional opinion disagrees with yours, of course it MUST be merely someone lashing out at strangers in order to feel superior! By God! Benjamin Spock should have been burned at the stake! Telling parents what to do!

Sadly, by the time Child Protective Services is called into the picture (or, as you put it "proven otherwise&quot , those "basically good, doing-their-best parents" may have irreparably damaged their children.

[ciaobaby]

38. The problem with your comments....

You make way too many assumptions, as if you were there and new all that took place and what his childhood was prior to this incident. Why are you taking the words of the parents without any question.
Given your stated profession I am surprised.
Take a breath.

[Divernan]

41. I specifically did NOT take the words of the parents without question.

In reply 12 of this thread, I wrote:

All that being said, who is to say these parents are telling the truth. Maybe the little boy did NOT throw rocks. Maybe they were angry at him for something else - like he wet his pants. Or spilled a drink in the car.

Obviously, none of the people commenting on this thread know the facts of this particular malfeasance on the part of the parents - since there has yet to be an investigation. I hope you do agree that the parents should not have abandoned a 7 year old in a remote area known for having bears! My comments were made in regard to general knowledge of how mistakes by parents put children in situations which are beyond a child's ability to cope, whether emotionally or physically.

Perhaps you might wag your finger at the poster who responded to me that I was
salivating at the chance to lash into total strangers and that it made me feel superior. Tell them to take a breath.

And FWIW, fellowships do not a profession make. I held a NIMH Research Fellowship for 3 years early on in my career and next completed a law degree. My life's career was as a lawyer/law professor. I had a number of cases where children died brutal deaths as a result of parents' negligent and stupid behavior. I still recall the father who testified that his 10 year old son (who was crushed flat at a demolition site when a crane his father was carelessly disassembling collapsed on the child) - never wanted to spend his weekends playing Little League ball. Oh no, the little boy LOVED working for Daddy at highly dangerous, filthy demolition sites. Daddy had NO idea the state had Child Labor Laws, of course.


Then there were heartbreaking cases with young kids riding on/operating/falling off of or under all terrain vehicles or lawn mowers. Every year thousands of children are injured in lawn mowing "accidents". Very horrible injuries - amputated feet or hands; quadriplegics with spinal damage, etc.

Also lots of product liability suits where parents ignored warning labels and warnings in instruction pamphlets: "Not to be operated by anyone under the age of 18".

Am I too harsh in my criticisms? Not if even one person reads my comments and acts more carefully and responsibly in raising their child.

[ciaobaby]

42. Parents were absolutely wrong.

I think we all agree with that.

[Chemisse]

48. You seem to have a dim view of parents in general.

As a 'professional' you are likely exposed to the worst of the worst - and therefore are likely to see the worst of motivations in parents around you.

Really, the vast majority ARE 'basically good and doing their best.' And even the really bad ones still love their children.

[Feeling the Bern]

15. Can't speak for Japan, but sociopathy is common in China. It's called "Xiao Wang Zi" or 4-2-1.

Xiao Wang Zi （小王子 means little emperor. The kids run the house because the parents work insane hours and the grandparents want to be the kid's friend rather than the kid's authority figure.

Which leads to the 4-2-1 (four grandparents and two parents doting on one kid) problem, which only heightens the sense of entitlement and sociopathy.

I've watched my former students in China break phones of other students who had a better phone right in front of me. When I admonished them for it and asked why, I would get the Martin Shrekli smug look and they would say "because they don't deserve it."

There is little discipline for things like throwing stones because "what can we do about it." Bullying in school is actively encouraged as a way of toughening up the weaker students.

Korea was the same way. Again, I cannot speak for Japan because I have only gone there on vacation (Osaka, Kyoto and Fukuoka), but from the things I have been told, the problems are there too, and also swept under the rug due to a loss of face if exposed.

As one principal in China told me: "There are no learning disabled kids in China. Kids are either stupid, retarded or crazy." So, no SPED anywhere.

[Bonobo]

27. Nope, you can't. Japan is nothing like China. nt

[OnDoutside]

7. The parents have lied once already, why not twice ?

[Jesus Malverde]

52. Yeah I suspect there is more to the story...nt

[saltpoint]

9. Maybe somebody ought to have

a little chat with these parents about adult problem-solving.

Before or after their arrest. Any time's a good time.

[saltpoint]

10. I hope this guy is found safe and

sound someplace. If there's an equivalent of Child Protective Services in that area, I hope an out-of-home placement has been swiftly arranged.

Bears being fairly large creatures, and 7-year olds being not-so-large-at-all creatures... Let's hope for a good outcome here.

[Feeling the Bern]

17. Can't speak for Japan, but in China, I can tell you the cops will not get involved.

Child abuse, child neglect, spousal abuse. . .they still consider it a family issue and the family needs to deal with it.

Call the police about something like this, they normally hang up on you and tell you solve it yourself. Call 110 about child abuse and they will tell you it's the family's issue and the child should listen to their parents so the child wouldn't be punished.

[saltpoint]

18. The story is covered in

the Japan Times here:

http://www.japantimes.co.jp/news/2016/05/30/national/parents-missing-7-year-old-boy-confess-lying-say-left-son-hokkaido-mountains-punishment/#.V0wzgpNriis

-- and includes this:

They are investigating whether the parents should be charged with abandoning their child.

[Feeling the Bern]

20. Which is why I said "I can't speak for Japan since I never lived there."

[saltpoint]

22. Another poster has indicated that

the search for the child now on hold owing to nightfall.

I hope they are somehow able to find him and that there is a good outcome here. If it is true the child was throwing stones at cars it is also true that abandonment in the mountains is a wildly inappropriate and cruel consequence.

[betsuni]

19. Just saw the news, search was stopped after dark tonight.

Doesn't look good. They said the boy was throwing stones at people when the family was at a riverside park and the father decided to drop him off on the way home. I don't know the area so have no idea if it was off the beaten track, but the road didn't look paved or have any streetlights. I'd be surprised if that was a main road to the park. Isolated heavily forested deserted area, drop off kid, leave for who knows how long. Suspicious.

[Divernan]

21. Variation on the dog ate my homework lie

The bear ate my kid.

[mainer]

25. I remember threatening to leave my kid at the side of the road

if he didn't stop hitting his brother. But to actually do it?

[Phentex]

32. Yep. The equivalent of I'll turn this car around...

I can't imagine leaving a 7 year old ANYWHERE alone.

[rusty fender]

40. The "DUH" headline of the year

What did those asshole parents expect to happen

[Chemisse]

47. They expected to return to a terrified (but forevermore compliant) child.

It's a horrible (and hopefully outdated) parenting practice.

[Arazi]

43. I hope he's found. I hope he's alive

I hope the parents suffer every day for their cruelty to such a young child

[obamanut2012]

44. I think his father killed him

Possibly accidentally. I don't believe his story, sorry.

[Chemisse]

46. The problem with that theory,

is that his wife and daughter were also there.

It's hard for 3 people to keep a secret that big, particularly in the face of police interrogation.

It could have happened that way, but seems unlikely to me.

[McCamy Taylor]

49. "I thought it might be taken as a domestic violence." Dude, that's manslaughter!

Close to murder if there really are bears in the area. Proves that there are unfit parents in every part of the world. And makes me wonder if they killed and left the child and now are afraid someone will find the body.