Campus security guard admits he accidentally shot himself after first lying about black man in a hoo

[JonLP24]

Source: NY Daily News

Shoot first and hope no one will ask obvious questions later.

After 1,800 students were placed on lockdown and 55 police officers, a state patrol helicopter and four K-9 units were brought in to scour the area around a Minnesota college Tuesday night, a security guard finally admitted he hadn't been assaulted by an imaginary black man in a hooded sweatshirt.

Instead, Brent Ahlers allegedly told police Wednesday he accidentally shot himself in the shoulder on the campus of St. Catherine University in St. Paul, Minn., the Star Tribune reports, with a gun he wasn't even allowed to have.

While they still needed to take a report of a shooting seriously, St. Paul police were so skeptical of the white 25-year-old's initial claim about an assailant who was armed and dangerous with a "short Afro" that they didn't even release a description of the made-up minority.

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/news/crime/campus-guard-admits-shot-lying-black-man-article-1.3497871

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Last word of title didn't fit in the box 'hoodie'.

[Pope George Ringo II]

1. Once knew a guy who shot himself

Rather than admit it, he told the police it was a 6'4" blond haired, blue eyed Mexican. In a town of 4,000 people, the police found a 6'4" blond haired, blue eyed Mexican...and beat the poor guy within an inch of his life. The shooter was horrified at the brutality and then came clean rather than also have an incarceration on his conscience. LULAC had some suggestions.

When a dimwit teenager I once knew lied about shooting himself, it gave me the chance to really think about it. I can understand and almost forgive it in a scared teenager. Adults, especially adults in uniform, are a different story.

[Turbineguy]

2. You gotta have the right music.

[Leghorn21]

3. Ha, just about to post this, guy!! After watching, I sing it all day long!! nt

[JonLP24]

4. That video cracked me up

Thanks

[left-of-center2012]

5. I grew up hunting and fishing

How do you accidentally shoot yourself in the shoulder?

[Journeyman]

6. I suspect he was practicing some silly gun-twirl as he was re-holstering it . . .

but your's was my first question, too -- hip, groin, toe, all more accessible -- but then I remembered the power and determination of stupid people and started to think like one. A fancy twirl seemed to fit the nature of the discharge.

Remember what H.L. Mencken observed a century ago: There's no underestimating the resourcefulness of the "boobeoise".

[left-of-center2012]

8. Simple ...

Put your finger inside the trigger guard,
and spin the pistol.

[sarisataka]

11. Pure speculation....

I don't think it was accidental. If the location reported is accurate it would be near a residence hall. St Kate's undergrad is all female.

I am thinking he was trying to create a hero image as the guard that took a bullet protecting the helpless maidens from the marauding black man. Voila, instant big man on campus

[JonLP24]

13. That's a pretty good theory

One I wouldn't have thought of.

I kept going through scenarios but kept ruling them out but yours makes sense.

[paleotn]

7. Barney needs to keep the bullet in his pocket

and not in his pistol.

[Afromania]

9. I like how they left out the most important part of the story

"Nevertheless, the 110-acre campus was put on lockdown for hours as 55 officers, four K-9s and a State Patrol aircraft searched for the suspect."

So they thought it was shit, but went ahead and devoted serious manpower to it anyway. Who knows what would have happened if they had found the mysterious "black man" they always seem to be looking for. Wait, yes we do, he'd have probably been beaten to a bloody pulp or shot dead before getting the story straight.

[JonLP24]

10. Doesn't the 2nd paragraph include that?

After 1,800 students were placed on lockdown and 55 police officers, a state patrol helicopter and four K-9 units were brought in to scour the area around a Minnesota college Tuesday night,

They left out how big the campus but maybe I'm missing something. Anyway, thanks for the link.

[Afromania]

12. yup, 1st paragraph, right at the top

wow, ok, eyes flew over that. I'll need to edit the first post.

[demigoddess]

14. Was this security guard afraid for his life because of this imaginary black man?

Was that why he was playing with his gun?