Amid mounting sanctions, Russian lawmaker demands America return Alaska to Russia

[AZLD4Candidate]

Source: KATV.com

A lawmaker in Russia has demanded the United States return Alaska to Russia as a reparation for American-led sanctions crippling his country's economy following the invasion of Ukraine.

Parliament member Oleg Matveychev made those demands, along with saying he also wanted America to return Fort Ross in California, during an interview on Sunday, The Daily Beast reports. The publication says Matveychev is known as the "Kremlin's spin-doctor."

Read more: https://katv.com/news/nation-world/russian-lawmaker-demands-america-return-alaska-and-pay-reparations-due-to-sanctions-ukraine-oleg-matveychev-kremlin-fort-ross-california-antartic-ocean-economy

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

[Ocelot II]

1. Maybe they'd just take Sarah Palin and her house that she can see Russia from?

I'd be ok with that..

[Miguelito Loveless]

8. As much as it pains me to come to her defense

Palin didn’t say that:

https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/sarah-palin-russia-house/

[Orrex]

11. WHAT?!? Oh damn, that one hurts.

Until ten seconds ago I had no doubt that she said it. That's a bitter pill to un-swallow!

[Ocelot II]

12. Oh I know that; it was from a SNL skit. But she said something pretty close,

IIRC it was something about how you can actually see Russia from land in Alaska, and then she said something about how she could keep an eye on Putin.

[Miguelito Loveless]

15. The exact quote:

“They’re our next-door neighbors, and you can actually see Russia from land here in Alaska, from an island in Alaska”

Factually correct. One of the few times.

[Ocelot II]

16. Here's the other thing she said about Putin and Russia:

"As Putin rears his head and comes into the airspace of the United States of America, where do they go? It's Alaska. It's just right over the border. It is from Alaska that we send those out to make sure that an eye is being kept on this very powerful nation, Russia, because they are right there, they are right next to our state." https://www.salon.com/2008/09/27/russia_palin/

That one kind of cracked me up.

[wnylib]

20. Wasn't that in response to a question about

her knowledge and experience of foreign relations and policies? I think she brought it up to claim that being so close to Russia gave her some foreign experience as governor of Alaska.

[Miguelito Loveless]

27. Hey, that was her attempt at gravitas

That it was funny can’t be helped.

[BumRushDaShow]

39. And that became a popular meme posted here on DU

[sdfernando]

63. Little Diomede and Big Diomede

Islands in the Bering Strait. Big Diomede is in Russia and Little Diomede is in the U.S.A.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diomede_Islands

[texasfiddler]

13. This type of post separates democrats from republicans.

It is quite admirable. I love science and facts. Yet, humor IMO is democrats best messaging against the GOP. I would say let the joke do its job.

[dchill]

36. Leave us our delusions!

JK.

[Demsrule86]

54. I don't know if she said it or not...but Snopes isn't good anymore.

[Miguelito Loveless]

55. Based on what evidence?

They provide actual video of what she said, and link to the original SNL sketch with Tina Fey. I have always found Snopes to be quite a reliable fact checker, and they certainly are correct in this case. In a time where lying is second nature to our opponents, it is doubly important we are accurate and truthful.

[Evolve Dammit]

49. perfect!

[Walleye]

2. We would be glad to send them some missiles from Alaska. Armed and aimed

[IronLionZion]

3. GOP would love to give them all of California

not just an old settlement. I didn't know about Fort Ross before so I guess I learned something today.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fort_Ross,_California

[FailureToCommunicate]

9. The Russian gave up on settling that region of California, due to groundhogs...

diggin up all the subsistence food they tried to grow, according to the local history. Resupply from Russia got too difficult, and they packed up and left.

A lovely area to visit as a tourist, though.

[msfiddlestix]

45. We love our Fort Ross. Schools like to take their students there for week long reenactment

field trips. Part of our California History curriculum.

[oldsoftie]

41. Me too! Never heard of that before

[BootinUp]

4. I was just thinking of the scene from Wrath of Khan

standby to receive our transmission

Here it comes

[LudwigPastorius]

5. Comrade Matveychev can gargle my balls.

Howza bout a truckload of rancid walrus blubber instead, asshole?

[LakeVermilion]

6. Sorry, no go...

We kept the receipt.

[Grokenstein]

7. Try and take them, Janky Broken Hobo Russia.

[Tomconroy]

10. Any chance they'd take Texas instead?

[keithhs28]

34. Florida too?

[TeamProg]

14. Thanks for letting us know that the sanctions are having a serious effect. N/T

[regnaD kciN]

17. "...the Russian River, too..."

[ZellyCabMem]

18. Indigenous

With Ukraine being this challenging, Putin, meet Alaskans with weapons and a territorial reality far superior to dial-up Soviet technology and impervious to thuggish war crime tactics.

[gopiscrap]

74. welcome to DU

[JohnnyRingo]

19. Come get it.

It's right there by their back yard. How hard can it be?
They really need to get over themselves.

[The Unmitigated Gall]

21. Fuck yourself, Oleg.

Just jump right up and FUCK YOURSELF.

To angry to be witty right now.

[dalton99a]

22. All sales final - they cashed the check, and their czar signed the receipt

https://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=16485695

[Stuart G]

23. Perhaps the Dumbest Piece of S**t that has ever existed..

....Of Course....Apologies to all Manure Lovers...(for any reason)...

This wasn't a recent deal ...was it? ... ....1867...well that is a while ago..

It goes to prove that ...............:

That Donald Trump is not the only stupid person on the face of the earth.
This fellow is stupider than Trump...Is that correct?

I just saw ...Dalton99a's post above me...1867,,quite a deal...quite a while ago.

....................signed by the leader of Russia at the time..

[oasis]

24. "Russian lawmaker"?

[sakabatou]

25. As Bender from Futurama has said...

[Stuart G]

26. Repeat AZLD4Candidate's original response for all to see...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

[XanaDUer2]

60. ? Nt

[NCjack]

28. Listen, Oleg: All this stuff that we are providing to UKR isn't cheap.

You Ruskies owe us. Since you have insufficient US dollars or gold, we will take it in LAND.

We are going to land in force on your east coast and head west until we meet a stopping force. At that point, we take from the longitude all your land to the east. It's only fair. Those people want to be Americans. We will be their Liberators, liberating them from Russian fascism.

[Stuart G]

29. And..............Let's have a vote if those people want to be part of the U.S.A...Oh...I had better

say this:......A SECRET VOTE....JUDGED BY INDEPENDENT JUDGES FROM SWITZERLAND

[keithbvadu2]

30. But you have to also take Sarah and her abstinence-free daughter in the deal.

But you have to also take Sarah and her abstinence-free daughter in the deal.

[trusty elf]

38. ...

[AverageOldGuy]

31. We will return Alaska ONLY . . .

. . . if they agree to take Sarah Palin and the entire Palin clan. And keep them.

[L. Coyote]

32. Don't worry, the military equipment is freighting east.

Russian armor heading in the direction of Ukraine.

Link to tweet

[oldsoftie]

42. And they had ALREADY redeployed forces from the Far East to begin with

Be funny if china decided to "expand" into undefended Russia

[L. Coyote]

51. The Far East and Siberian republics will break away after this bullshit.

China would happily align with them. Would that be ironic, China saying we recognize their independence.

[Rhiannon12866]

33. As long as they take Sarah Palin!

[ShazzieB]

35. When I saw tye title of the o.p., I HOPED it was going to be The Onion.

Good thing I wasn't holding my breath. 😑

[AntiFascist]

37. Putin's government sounds as competent as his military n/t

[dianaredwing]

40. Can't we just give them

Sarah Palin?

[Vinca]

43. Maybe we could just give them Palin???

[msfiddlestix]

44. So hilarious to see Fort Ross included in this reparation demand

Yes, Russian Fur traders did indeed explore the Northern California coast and established the settlement of Fort Ross. Our main river is called The Russian River, and I suspect (don't know for sure) that the name sake of our little town of Sebastopol is associated with Sevastopol... There is a Russian explorer history here in my neck of the woods and the Russian Fur Traders provided aid and comfort to local native tribes helped prevent Junepero Serro's continuation of establishing Missionary Settlements ala Missions, the last one was established in the little town of Sonoma.

But that was before California was admitted as a State. And long before Stalin et al.

So this report s seriously funny. Thanks for the chuckles!

[AntiFascist]

66. Didn't they also bring the sea otter close to extinction by hunting them? n/t

[msfiddlestix]

72. No doubt Easy fur harvesting along with a plethora of other wildlife.

[Xipe Totec]

46. Or else what?

[Ray Bruns]

47. WE bought Alaska fair and square. We have the receipts.

[MissMillie]

59. beat me to it. I was going to say "we have the receipts." n/t

.

[eppur_se_muova]

48. We paid the equivalent of over $133 million in 2020 dollars ... add 5% interest for 155 years ...

Russia would have to pay us over $256 billion just to equal the original selling price. I wouldn't accept a check from Vlad for $5.

[csziggy]

57. 5% interest compounded monthly for 155 years

Not gonna happen. it would add up to $18,596,395,179,787,571,203,272,118,378,072,176,154,204,176,384.00!
https://www.thecalculatorsite.com/finance/calculators/compoundinterestcalculator.php

Here is a good article about the issue:

A Russian lawmaker wants Alaska back. ‘Good luck with that!’
By Iris Samuels
Updated: 13 hours ago Published: 13 hours ago

A Russian parliament member has called for the return of Alaska to Russian, prompting a quick dismissal from Alaska politicians and others.

The statement came as Russian President Vladimir Putin has attempted to rewrite history in an effort to explain away his war in Ukraine. But Russia has not seriously considered reclaiming Alaska since the territory was sold to the U.S. for $7.2 million in 1867, and Putin himself indicated in 2014 that he had no interest in retaking Alaska.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Alaska and Fort Ross made up what was called Russian America. The largest number of Russians in the territory never exceeded 600 people, according to historian Stephen Haycox, an emeritus professor of history at the University of Alaska Anchorage.

“Alaska was simply too far away and too expensive to think of defending,” Haycox said.

More: https://www.adn.com/politics/2022/03/16/a-russian-lawmaker-wants-alaska-back-good-luck-with-that/

If Alaska was too expensive to defending back then, Russia couldn't take it now!


ETA - if 5% compounded annually, it still adds up to $16,448,341,041.00 I like the other figure - it would pay off the US national debt and fund programs for decades to come.

[Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin]

71. They sold it to us not long after the Crimean War

The reason was they didn't want the British Empire, in this case Canada on their doorstep.

[Evolve Dammit]

50. "You'll get nothing and like it." Judge Smails

[Roc2020]

52. If Putin isn't taken out Putin will get to a point where he forces NATO

in the fight. Just a matter of when will he and his inner circle get suicidal. And which countries do they want to take with them.

[AZLD4Candidate]

53. Germany, Poland, the the Baltics, and Ukraine will get nuclear missiles lobbed at them.

[oldsoftie]

62. I doubt anyone would follow that order & Putin can't do it alone.

It would mean the end of Russia.

[Roc2020]

64. Exactly. But there are enough

people around Putin that are true believers that believes If the West wants to destroy Russia, they are coming with them.

[AntiFascist]

67. That's exactly how Putin wants to frame this: "the West wants to destroy Russia"...

the truth is that the West only wants to have a war criminal (and those supporting him) taken out of power. There seem to be some in the FSB who are not 'true believers'.

[malthaussen]

56. Poe's Law strikes again.

There was a cartoon at least a week ago about this very thing.

-- Mal

[Jilly_in_VA]

58. Sorry, old son

We paid you for it. It's ours now. Go fry ice.

[FakeNoose]

68. Yep, a deal's a deal

[discntnt_irny_srcsm]

61. Well, two things...

We paid for it. $7.2 million with interest would be around $1.1 trillion in today's dollars.

And we have a receipt, so...

[Crowman2009]

65. Wonder if their troops can swim in the Bering strait?

Because the only way the can get to Alaska is by ship. Now aircraft, that won't happen because of either parts or getting shot down by the USAF.

[Kashkakat v.2.0]

69. OK, but then THEY need to give it back to the Inuit, Athabaskans, Tglingit, etc. etc.

Maybe it wasnt really theirs to sell LOL. Which adds another layer of absurdity to this request.

[Hassler]

70. Reality or the Onion? It's impossible to tell anymore.

[jmowreader]

73. Eb tvoyu mats, bl'yad Matveychev

If you wouldn't have illegally invaded Ukraine, no sanctions would have been imposed. Actions have consequences, and the consequence of your illegal actions is the rest of the world is going to ruin your economy for you.

And as an aside, doesn't this sound exactly like something Trump would say?

[olddad65]

75. Can we give them Alabama and/or Arizona instead?

[Brainfodder]

76. ...for the sanctions... the gall... I think a village is missing it's....