Family Says They Did Tip Gay Server, Didn't Leave Note

[Freddie Stubbs]

Source: NBC New York

After a gay server at a New Jersey restaurant said a customer denied her a tip and wrote her a hateful note on the receipt, a local family contacted NBC 4 New York and said their receipt shows they paid a tip and didn't write any such note.

Dayna Morales, a former Marine and a server at Gallop Asian Bistro in Bridgewater, posted a photo on Facebook earlier this month, showing the bill with a line through the space for a tip. The photo of the receipt showed someone had written, "I'm sorry but I cannot tip because I do not agree with your lifestyle."

Morales indicated in her Facebook post, and in subsequent media interviews -- including with NBC 4 New York -- that the customer wrote that line.

But a family contacted NBC 4 New York claiming their receipt from the restaurant shows they did leave a tip, and provided what they said was a credit card statement as proof.

Read more: http://www.nbcnewyork.com/news/local/Gay-Server-Tip-Lifestyle-Receipt-Discrepancy-233040811.html

[ErikJ]

1. That happened here a couple times:-pseudo-hate-crime-victimology

Once about 10 years a gay woman took photos of a anti-gay graffiti sprayed on her house and it turned out she did it herself. I remember there was another one but cant quite remember the specifics.

[FrodosPet]

10. There is the case of Charlie Rogers last year

http://www.queerty.com/charlie-rogers-faked-hate-crime-20120822/

Charlie Rogers, a 33-year-old lesbian from Lincoln, Nebraska who claimed three men broke into her home and physically scarred her before trying to burn down her house last month, has been accused of faking the attack in hopes it would spark change.

~ snip ~

According to Peschong, police found a pile of clothes, white knit gloves and a red box cutter on the living room floor after the alleged attack. Rogers said the gloves didn’t belong to her, but investigators determined that a lot of the DNA found inside the glove was Rogers’ and that none of it came from a male.

Peschong said investigators discovered that Rogers deleted numerous text messages she had sent the evening of the alleged attack, and that she bought cotton gloves, a box cutter and zip ties from an Ace Hardware Store in Lincoln on July 17. All of the items were later found in her house, he said. When confronted about the evidence weeks later, he said, Rogers admitted to purchasing all of the items except the gloves.

She also sent a photo of a cross-shaped cut on her chest to a friend a few days before the reported attack, Peschong said.

~ snip ~

[question everything]

80. This is really too bad

Just with false rape claim - yes, they happen - such incidents make it harder for real victims to get justice.

[JimDandy]

116. The waitress is probably a victim in all this, too.

She reported the "Dan" conversation (misunderstanding) to her manager. Then a gay-bashing note appears on the manager's receipt (in handwriting that both the waitress and customer deny is theirs) and the waitress doesn't receive a tip... a tip that, according to the customer's bank statement, clearly was charged to the customer's credit card. Who was in a position to benefit from the disappearing tip AND could have engineered this? The restaurant owner comes to mind. Perhaps the IRS needs to look into this restaurant's books for possible tip withholdings/thefts?

[XemaSab]

53. Happened at my old high school

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

2. This happens when people see profit from it

Many of the cases of waitstaff not being left tips and instead getting nasty notes go viral, someone starts a fundraiser, etc. etc....

[Ash_F]

3. It's damaging to the cases where it is true.

That was a really poor choice.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

5. I suspect the right wing will waste little time in claiming all such stories are bull.

It's sad someone made that decision.

[Ash_F]

6. Exactly. Don't give them ammunition. /nt

[FranMonet]

4. It's simple check the handwriting

If you want to tell who's telling the truth check the handwriting of both parties.

[DeschutesRiver]

58. Easier - check the total of her receipt, and check the total charged on the credit card

They must be the same; otherwise if their credit card statement indicates a higher amount, that would mean a tip was included.

I'd like to see both items now - her copy of the receipt with the writing, and the family's credit card statement to determine where the truth lies.

Since both claim to have them, this is easy to resolve.

ETA - finally got the article up and if they can show that credit card statement with the $111.50 charge to that restaurant for that day, then they are cleared of this. Sounds like the reporters saw the statement. And the restaurant needs to finish its audit and let the public know if they are at all responsible.

I guess all the server needed to do was run another copy of the receipt, roughly copy their sig and add her note to it and get her 15 min of fame, though these frauds only cause harm to others with this crap. I wish she had found a different way to make a statement, as many others manage to do.

I also see she made some cash off this and says she donated a bit of it; I'd also like to see proof of that before I completely write her off as a fraud. Sigh..what a mess.

[Jesus Malverde]

66. It's all in the news report at the link.

I'd be pretty upset after leaving her 20% tip too.

[DeschutesRiver]

95. Had trouble getting link to open but I've read it now. nt

[Lasher]

75. I prefer to leave my tips on the table in cash.

When I do that I line through the gratuity amount on the merchant copy of the receipt. In that case there is no record of my gratuity, not even on my credit card statement. My point is, your investigation would be inconclusive in my case.

[MicaelS]

89. I don't ever do that.

I want there to be a record of just how much I tipped, when and where. That way, I could never be accused of anything like this.

[DeschutesRiver]

90. Yes, in your specific example, which is not the case here from what I read.

It will be definitive here, as they claim to have used a credit card, added a tip and have produced a statement showing a higher amount on the date in question.

My point was that in this case, given what the participants say themselves, this shouldn't have to remain a mystery for long.

[Lasher]

96. Yes, that is true.

Just felt like going hypothetical on this one.

[DeschutesRiver]

106. Yeah, the way this has gone down does suggest that anything might be possible..

And I've done the same, ie leave the tip in cash. I've thought, perhaps mistakenly, that the server would be certain to get all of my tip that way, if he/she so chose.

But after seeing what a mess it could put me in, I think it is more prudent just to leave a record of it by doing it on my credit card. If this family hadn't done that, we'd still be chewing them out without waiting for more facts.

I know I was growling, as it made me blazing mad. And I should have known to wait until all the easily obtainable facts were in...so now we wait to see for sure.

[MADem]

76. ...the restaurant needs to finish its audit and let the public know if they are at all responsible.

You know, it COULD be that someone on the waitstaff did that to the server to make fun of her. It might be that both the ostensible victim and the supposed perpetrator(s) were gamed by a third party who doctored a receipt to make it seem like the server was being hated on...?

I am curious, too....

[MicaelS]

92. I think you have the answer.

I'm willing to bet this was done by someone at the restaurant who hated Morales, and decided to humiliate her. I bet they had no idea how it would escalate.

[DeschutesRiver]

93. Agree. At this point, what you mention is also a possibility. nt

[MicaelS]

88. They have provided a credit card statement.

It shows a charge exactly as they stated, to that restaurant. ($111.55)

http://lezgetreal.com/2013/11/morales-tip-youre-lesbian-story-scam/

My prediction someone is going to be prosecuted for fraud.

[DeschutesRiver]

98. Thanks, hadn't seen the credit card statement. nt

[JimDandy]

117. Oddly, though, the customer's credit card statement should have shown TWO transactions

one for the $93.55 bill that was run initially and a second transaction for the $18 tip. Wonder why the customer's bank shows just one transaction for the combined total of $111.55?

[LisaL]

126. No, it shouldn't.

Mine never does.
It shows one transaction for the whole amount.

[MicaelS]

129. What? No, I eat out all the time...

And mine never does that.

[tammywammy]

130. I've never seen two transactions for a restaurant, only the one with the tip included. n/t

[hexola]

145. Depends on the payment vendor...some make the tip a separate transaction.

If I go home right after using my debit/credit card at my local pub - my online banking ledger will only show the food/drinks. It takes about 48 hours for the tip to show up...added to the meal total.

But - It still shows as one transaction in the ledger...

[tomm2thumbs]

7. will be interesting to see if the restaurant can verify whether the bank statement is accurate

seems like the restaurant would have figured that out earlier... and certainly can check now

plus the term 'tolerate' appeared to come out of the shadow'd people's mouth more than once... tolerate is not usually a term used by people who are open to others sexuality or other differences.

I'll refrain from judging the supposed truth here but it sounds like something still isn't right here

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

8. It's probable these people were picked because they weren't very friendly in the first place nt

[LisaL]

33. They thought her name was Dan instead of Dayna.

Which I presume is why they were picked.

[MADem]

78. They say that the person who seated them told them their server would be DAN.

Maybe the seater screwed over the server... and these people (who didn't vote for Chris Christie) are innocent? A little restaurant feud between seater/server, or something? It could be that there's a third party in this scenario....?

[hexola]

82. Good point...Is there in fact a server named "Dan" that works here?

If not - that, again, points to someone else on the staff being behind this...

[OrwellwasRight]

87. Or they misunderstood the seater

and thought they heard "Dan." Happens all the time.

[MADem]

99. From the TV report, it seems as if they are calling the server Day - na, not Dan- ah...

I wouldn't confuse Day-Na and Dan-ah, because they don't sound the same (if her name was Danna, that would be another story of course)--so again, I'm wondering if the person who seated the customers didn't have a grudge against Dayna and decided to fuck with her by feeding the customers a wrong name to hurt Dayna's feelings, and then followed up with a doctored receipt to further jerk her chain.

This one is a mystery, but if the restaurant does a little digging they should be able to figure it out pretty easily.

[OrwellwasRight]

104. I can't say what happened, I'm just saying

I've been in situations where what I have heard was about 0% close to what was actually said. I've also been yelled at by an airport clerk for not saying thank you when I in fact did. You don't have to "accurately" mishear something. People often don't listen carefully (or at all) or don't speak loudly enough.

You could be right about one employee trying to mess with or perhaps actually harm the other. It's a good theory. I'm just positing an additional theory.

[MADem]

107. I get what you're saying, it is just that when I mishear, I might hear Fran or Stan or

Cam for Dan, that "a" sound would stick even if I got the beginning and end of the word wrong. Mishearing Dan for DAY-na just seems, well, unlikely to me.

It's why I am wondering if the seater may have said her name wrong deliberately, just to shit-stir...?

[randome]

85. The man on the Grassy Knoll did this!

[hr][font color="blue"][center]There is nothing you can't do if you put your mind to it.
Nothing.[/center][/font][hr]

[davidpdx]

9. I agree, the problem is once the story broke there was outrage over it

If it turns out to be true will there be equal outrage? Maybe it's true, maybe it isn't. If the server was lying there should be consequences. It will be interesting to see what happens.

[JimDandy]

118. It could be they are both telling the truth

and a third party thought they could manipulate the situation to their advantage?

[davidpdx]

131. Yeah, I suppose that is possible

The TV station is bringing in a handwriting expert and the customer is submitting their handwriting and the bill which proves they left a tip.

[customerserviceguy]

18. Not everybody is current on the language to use

"Tolerate", or more properly, tolerence, had a different meaning many years ago.

I saw this story on the news last night, looks like the bank statement backs up their story. They took risks in coming forward, but they didn't want to put themselves in a position of complete vulnerability to activist violence. People around here get pretty scared of that sort of thing.

[FrodosPet]

111. "Tolerate" means putting up with something (or someone) you don't like, right?

That is the best short definition I could come up with.

[MADem]

141. No, not always. The Museum of Tolerance isn't about putting up with people.

It's a monument to anti-hate efforts wrt the Holocaust and Jewish people.

http://www.museumoftolerance.com/site/c.tmL6KfNVLtH/b.4865925/k.CAD7/HomeMOT.htm

The Museum of Tolerance (MOT) is the educational arm of the Simon Wiesenthal Center, an internationally renowned Jewish human rights organization. The only museum of its kind in the world, the MOT is dedicated to challenging visitors to understand the Holocaust in both historic and contemporary contexts and confront all forms of prejudice and discrimination in our world today.

Established in 1993, the MOT has welcomed over five million visitors, mostly middle and high school students. Visitors become witnesses to history and explore the dynamics of bigotry and discrimination that are still embedded in society today. Through interactive exhibits, special events, and customized programs for youths and adults, the Museum engages visitors’ hearts and minds, while challenging them to assume personal responsibility for positive change.

Perhaps no other institution offers such a motivational mix of historical discovery and personal empowerment.

We invite you to learn about our history and vision, what people are saying about us, and news of current and future projects...

The Southern Poverty Law Center has a program on "teaching tolerance" that has nothing to do with putting up with people:

http://www.tolerance.org/

A place for educators to find thought-provoking news, conversation and support for those who care about diversity, equal opportunity and respect for differences in schools

See? Not about "putting up with" anyone. It is about teaching respect and understanding for people who are outside one's cultural, ethnic, religious or orientation group.

[customerserviceguy]

144. Thank you

Like I said, "putting up with people you don't like" is a fairly modern definition of the word tolerance.

[FrodosPet]

149. At times like these, I defer to the dictionary

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/tolerance

1: capacity to endure pain or hardship : endurance, fortitude, stamina

2a : sympathy or indulgence for beliefs or practices differing from or conflicting with one's own
2b : the act of allowing something : toleration

3: the allowable deviation from a standard; especially : the range of variation permitted in maintaining a specified dimension in machining a piece

4a (1) : the capacity of the body to endure or become less responsive to a substance (as a drug) or a physiological insult especially with repeated use or exposure <developed a tolerance to painkillers>; also : the immunological state marked by unresponsiveness to a specific antigen (2) : relative capacity of an organism to grow or thrive when subjected to an unfavorable environmental factor
4b : the maximum amount of a pesticide residue that may lawfully remain on or in food

-----------------------

It seems to me if you LIKE someone or something, that is not tolerance.

[MADem]

153. Even your dictionary definition isn't about "like," though...

....sympathy or indulgence for beliefs or practices differing from or conflicting with one's own ....


If you are sympathetic to the beliefs/practices of others, you probably aren't hating on them. It's all about respect for differences, not that you are expected to "join the club." That is the definition of Simon Weisenthal, et.al's "tolerance."

Anyone who was sentient in the MLK civil rights era is cognizant of this definition, most certainly--it was a popular usage of the term back then.

[DaveJ]

11. People who discriminate rarely leave notes n/t

[MADem]

13. Or if they leave rude notes, they sure as hell shouldn't pay by CREDIT CARD.

Some mean jerk that digs through their wallet and pockets to find exact change might get shitty and snarky and mean under cloak of anonymity, but who in their right mind would, in essence, put their name to hate speech and make their name mud--"Hi, I am John Q. Public, and hetre's what I think of you because of your (insert race/orientation/ethnicity/other personal characteristic)....and eff you, too!"

Makes no damn sense.

[Drale]

52. Racists and Ignorant people generally are not very smart. /nt

[cali]

73. well is these people are ignorant racists, they evidently had the smarts

to forge a bank statement and a customer receipt. that doesn't jibe so well with leaving a nasty note while using a credit card.

which one is it?

[davidpdx]

132. I don't think you can forge a bank statement

The customer is providing them to the TV station. Further verification could be done by the customer by simply calling the bank and asking the representative to state the amount charged on the day. If the customer is telling the truth, it is easily verifiable.

Plus a TV station is bringing in a hand writing expert. Between those two things that should pretty much lay to rest who did what.

[ReRe]

12. Twill be interesting to see how this turns out...

... One or t'other of them is lying. Wouldn't it be a coincidence if BOTH were lying.

[Festivito]

16. Not likely tho. Zero recs on a review of the case. Just comments so far.

Zero recs means it won't be read by nominal readers on DU. I rarely get a chance to get down to reading the Latest page.

The un reviewed news item made the home page more than once as I recall.

[HughBeaumont]

14. OH, the poor, persecuted, red-meat slurping heteros in the comments section!

Won't SOMEone talk them off the LEDGE!??!?

[LisaL]

20. WTF does that mean?

Do you think it's o'key to falsely accuse people if they are heterosexual?

[penultimate]

108. Makes sense.

[jessie04]

109. Exactly.

nt

[maced666]

159. If they did it or not, this post proves one thing-

If you don't believe there are people out there that would do this sort of thing, or similar, look no further.......

[Niceguy1]

15. if true then maybe a lawsuit or prosecution should be in order

,maybe for fraud?

[jessie04]

17. It appears Dayna is in a world of trouble.

dumb,dumb,dumb

[Lucky Luciano]

19. It was on the local news here last night.

It is pretty damning for the waitress. The family in question did have the receipt showing an $18 tip on a $93.55 bill for a total of $111.55. Their CC statement also had the $111.55 charge and the restaurant had no $93.55 charges that night. The report did say that there may have been confusion over her name as the family accidentally thought her name might have been "Dan" instead of "Dayna." maybe that triggered anger in Dayna that caused this mess?

[Xyzse]

21. Looking at the handwriting the handwriting looks the same though...

If you look at the "5"s, they are very similar.

I'd go by the credit card statement if provided. However, since it seems that the credit card of the family was charged for more...
I'd probably think the customer is right.

[LisaL]

22. What handwriting?

Family says they didn't write anything on the receipt. Fives don't look the same.

[Xyzse]

23. Must be my eyesight.

I'd go with the credit card charges.
Seems the family was charged more than what is written, so I'd go with that.

[marble falls]

24. It happens a lot. The customer takes the origional, signs the wrong copy, figures on the copy and...

and forgets to fill the original. Waiters get mad and blow it up a little to vent on a stiffed tip.

The note and the statement from Visa hard hard to explain away but easy t understand if you ever worked front of the house..

[LisaL]

25. They say they paid her a tip.

They have a credit card statement proving the tip was paid.
Bill was 93.55. Their credit card was charged 111.55.

[CBGLuthier]

26. It is possible they realized they had the wrong copy and called the restaurant

and authorized the tip to be run. That happened where my daughters work this past week. They have also experienced the no tip at all because the customer takes the wrong copy and never calls back. One of them had this happen with a party of TWENTY a few weeks ago and was quite upset at working an hour keeping a huge table happy only to get 100 percent stiffed because people are careless, stupid, or cheap.

Otherwise something is very wrong here as the tip would not have been run if they did not write it on the merchant copy.

[LisaL]

27. No, it's not possible since restaraunt doesn't have a record of this happening.

The family says they paid a tip from the start.

[CBGLuthier]

29. Then the merchant copy in that photo has been doctored.

There is no way for both sets of facts to be true.

[LisaL]

30. I don't think anybody is arguing that both sets of fact can be true.

[CBGLuthier]

32. OK

You win.

[hexola]

34. If by "doctored" - you mean somone put a line through the tip and wrote a note

Then I agree -

But those receipts aren't "facts" - they are evidence...and it's easy to conceive such evidence can exist....

[hexola]

31. Most good restaurants will automatically add the gratuity for parties of 8 or more...

Sometimes management is also careless, stupid or cheap...

[LisaL]

43. If they add gratuity, it should be on the receipt.

Which this receipt didn't have.

[hexola]

47. So - safe to assume this was a small party...no auto gratuity in play...nt

[LisaL]

128. It was four people.

Parents and their two kids.

[MADem]

81. Last time I was out (in a baaaaah in downtown Boston), I got THREE copies of my bill.

One merchant, one customer and one that was just...errr....THERE.

I dunno if they filed the spare somewhere, or what....? Maybe these guys signed that third copy?

[whopis01]

36. What's weird though is the signed receipt without a tip written in.

I can't figure out what the heck happened here.

Looking at the two receipts, I would have assumed that they did not leave a tip because the merchant copy is signed and has no tip written in on it. Once the story hit, the customers could have written in a tip on the copy they took home in order to try to cover their asses.

But they have the credit card charge for the right amount, including the tip. But what is confusing is that the signed copy left with the restaurant doesn't have a tip written in - so how did the restaurant know how much to charge them?

So - I believe that the customers did indeed leave a tip - but just can't figure out exactly what happened at the restaurant with the merchant copy of the receipt.

[LisaL]

39. Per the article, restaurant didn't produce the original copy of the receipt (to the press).

So figure it out.

[Xyzse]

40. See, you may have something there.

If the restaurant automatically charged them a tip. The customers could have looked at their credit card statement and put in the tip themselves on their copy.

Forgot that some restaurants do charge tip automatically. However, those usually need a signature.

You're right that it is odd that the restaurant would have a signed receipt without a tip in there. There is no point in reprinting or recreating one.

[LisaL]

42. If restaurant automatically charges a tip, I presume that should be on the receipt.

I presume they can't just charge someone without telling them.
Every time I was automatically charged gratuity, it was on the receipt, and I could leave extra.

[Xyzse]

44. Yeah...

The whole thing is weird.
I mean, the receipt was not photoshopped right?

If it wasn't, where would the server get that copy? Even if she wrote all of that herself.

[LisaL]

45. How do we know if it was or wasn't?

Restaurant refused to produce the original to the press, despite claiming they had it.

[Xyzse]

46. That's why I placed it in a question mark.

I don't know. Assuming it was not photoshopped, it is very odd.

I wonder if the restaurant would actually show the receipt, unless they are really that inept in their record keeping.

[LisaL]

49. Unless I see the original from the restaurant (which they claim they have), but refused to show

to the press, I am not going to assume any such thing.

[Xyzse]

50. Agreed on waiting to see the original receipt

[B2G]

48. three receipts are sometimes produced

I've received 2 copies for myself numerous time. I won't be leaving that extra copy at the restaurant anymore however.

[hexola]

56. Yes - often, the first receipt (bill) has the suggested tips at the bottom.

That the server presents the fist bill to the customer...this often has 3 suggested tip amounts at the bottom.

You give the server your money or your debit/credit card.

They run the card...then they bring you the two receipts we see in these pics...

One is for the customer, the other is kept by the Merchant. I guess you are expected to fill each with duplicate info.

At my restaurant...they are identical - except for the word Merchant/Customer.

In the video - the customers seem to have their copy...So perhaps they just forgot to fill out both - or wrote the tip on the first bill - accidentally leaving the merchant copy blank.

[B2G]

60. If they left the merchant copy blank

How would the tip have been processed?

[hexola]

62. The tip might have been written on the first bill...which was left with the merchant copy.

And note - tips are often run as a separate sub-transaction.

My online bank statement will show the transaction total if I check when I get home - but the tip will get added about 48 hours later...

[hexola]

63. Remember - they have already run your card by the time you are presented with these receipts.

So - all they need is an amount to run to tip part of the transaction.

[JimDandy]

119. Exactly. The $93.55 clearly shows as already run on these two receipts.

There had to be a second transaction run for just the $18. But the customer's credit card statement shows only ONE transaction for $111.55. How did that happen? The customer should go to their bank and question them about that.

[sendero]

121. The initial "transaction"..

... is just a "will this card pay" query. It does not show up on ANY credit card statement. I have no idea where you got the idea it would.

[JimDandy]

122. Because it LOOKS like a transaction record. n/t

[LisaL]

127. Haven't you ever been to a restaurant?

It doesn't show as two lines on your credit card statement. It shows as one amount (bill+ tip).
So 93.55 + 18 would show as 111.55. Exactly what they have on credit card statement.

[sendero]

143. As a person who has used credit cards..

... to pay hundreds if not thousands of restaurant bills, I can assure you that the "will this card pay?" transaction does not appear on any statement, either paper or online.

This is merely a service that CC companies provide restaurants so that they don't find out after you have left that you gave them a declined card.

[MADem]

83. +1,000 - I mentioned this upthread. I think the third one is if you have to file for business

expenses.

[B2G]

97. Exactly

Business travelers need to turn in one receipt to the company and still need one for their personal records.

I have so many receipts when I get back it's ridiculous.

[davidpdx]

133. I'd even go as far as making sure the "book" with the receipt on is handed to someone

instead of left on the table. The three receipt thing is a recipe for disaster.

[jakesdad]

61. duplicate/reprint

POS terminals can reprint in case of misprints, damage (torn, wet, etc).

hate to say this but the simplest explanation is someone (likely her) reprinted the receipt, wrote the note/non-tip total & disposed of the original. not sure if they (POS terminals) log duplicate/reprints but knowing PCI it wouldn't surprise me & if they do that would definitely be the smoking gun. not saying that definitely IS what happened but it's the only logical explanation I can come up with that explains everything... I hope it's not b/c if I'm right then whoever signed the reprint technically committed forgery...

[hexola]

64. When/where did she find this note?

Did Dayna find this at her table? Or did the hostess or manager pick it up (not uncommon) and then show it to her when it was time to tip out?

[JimDandy]

120. It was the reporter's job to ask these questions.

How the restaurant handles billing their customer clearly played a part in all this.

[whopis01]

110. That does seem most likely

Though I was surprised that the customers didn't claim that the signature wasn't theirs. Perhaps it was faked (copied from the original) well enough that they couldn't tell?

[Captain Stern]

59. To me, the '5' look like they were written by different people.

The tops on the '5's on the left are straight, the ones on the left have a curve, and an upward tilt.

The bottoms of the '5's on the left are rounded, while the ones on the right have a hitch in them.

[AngryAmish]

28. I called shenanigans on this one when it happened.

Everyone (self included) sees themselves as the center of the universe. When there is a feature of your life that you see as really important (like sexuality) one sees every interaction with the universe as touching upon that important thing in your life. Very religious people are like that - they see every sunset as a sign from god that he loves them.

Anyway, many people want to seem brave, to put upon, etc. etc. So it seems with this person.

Or she is just a greedy fuck.

[snooper2]

35. If anybody actually takes the time to watch the video at the link

You can see who is lying...

BUSTED!

[hexola]

37. Yep - The Managers are keeping her tips...they wrote the note...

Managers...not standing behind the customer!??? Even accusing the customers of making it up!!!?

Be careful here - we are taking the bait if we assume Dayna set this up...

[LisaL]

38. I have no clue as to what you are talking about.

Dayna would be one bringing the receipt to the customer and then collecting it. Not her managers.

[hexola]

41. In my pub, sometimes the hostess (not waitress) will pick up the receipts.

...and then they are rung in by the bartender/manager...who tips-out the wait staff.

[MADem]

91. Years ago--well, decades ago--when I was young, before computers and cable TV,

I worked as a server in a restaurant and we pooled our tips and split them. The place was pretty busy on a constant basis so it wasn't like one person had it easier than the others. It wasn't unusual for two people to take care of a large party, as needed.

[davidpdx]

134. Wow, that is just crap

Can they screw their staff on tips?

[Jesus Malverde]

77. They were pretty shifty when interviewed. I like this angle...

Tho Dayna seemed to prevaricate a little too.

[hexola]

86. the "how you live your life..." part indicates someone with personal knowledge...

of Dayna...like you might have between co-workers...

...a slip up?

[Jesus Malverde]

101. I noticed that too.

It implies a lot a familiarity.

[JimDandy]

114. That is the most likely scenario.

Especially since Dayna said she reported the "Dan" conversation to, wait for it... the MANAGER. I'd say the IRS should get ready to go through this restaurant's books looking for possible amounts that appear to be tips stolen from employees.

What is strange is that both receipts show the card was initially run for $93.55. The customer then signs the receipt and authorizes an additional $18 charge for the tip. The combined total of $111.55 is listed on their credit card statement as one transaction, though. That leaves two questions unanswered: Where is the restaurant's merchant receipt for the $18 tip, and Why didn't the customer's bank show both the tip and total as two transactions, which they clearly have to be for this whole scenario to work.

If the customers can get the second transaction number from their bank, they can show Dayna that her tip was stolen. Both of these people then can go after the restaurant for theft and libel and the government could go after it for tax evasion, theft and fraud.

[davidpdx]

135. If this is true it's a double scam

Not only are tips (money) being stolen, but statements are being made that make the customer look homophobic (liable). Both the customer and the employee would deserve an apology in that case. Not only close down the restaurant, but throw them in jail.

[MADem]

142. They never do two transactions--they bill you for your food, by preparing the slip,

you add the tip, sign the thing, grab your copy, and leave... and they THEN add it up and send it in to the credit card people. The first bit, where they run the card, is to make sure you're good for it.

The difference between the food cost and the total goes to the server.

If you look at your statements, you'll see there's always one transaction amount at places where you tip. Never two.

If the customers' paperwork and bill holds up to scrutiny, it's likely they are off the hook. So that leaves either the server making the story up, or someone in the restaurant with a grudge against the server doctoring that receipt to mess with her.

[hexola]

146. If you study your online banking ledger...you will see there are 2 "transactions"

If I go home right after eating out - and check my ledger...It will show the bill - NO TIP...48 hours later - magically, the tip appears in the total. So - despite seeing 1 transaction...it is a 2 part processing.

[MADem]

148. Never have I seen this, and I have ordered out a lot down the years and paid with a card.

I am not saying it is impossible, I am simply saying I have never seen such a thing.

I think it's salient to note that there are only two people who can access the machine to forward the information to the credit card company or print a copy of that particular bill--that would be the server who created the bill, or the manager.

There are times when an extra copy of the bill is needed--the customer is a little drunk and messes the tip part up, or someone spills wine on the thing and makes it unreadable; and the server has to key in a code, or use a card, to access the print-out. And the server (or the manager) could indeed print more than one receipt.

If I were guessing, here, I'd guess that someone printed out an extra receipt, and used it to cause a little chaos.

In any event, the customers have produced a copy of their bank statement. That matches their customer copy of the bill for the date in question. I think they are off the hook, so now, it's down to someone in the restaurant other than the server, or the server herself.

On the facebook page cited in this thread, someone posted that the server had been suspended from working while an investigation was underway. That doesn't look too promising for her but we'll just have to wait and see how this shakes out.

[hexola]

55. The managers sound like they have an accent of some sort...

Now read the note - and think of that accent...

[LisaL]

125. Yes, restaurant sells chinese food so presumably the manager is Chinese.

Are you saying that is somehow nefarious?

[randome]

51. My first impression is not too kind for the server.

The note sounds too much like some victimology screed and she certainly promoted the hell out of it.

But first impressions are rarely right so...
[hr][font color="blue"][center]There is nothing you can't do if you put your mind to it.
Nothing.[/center][/font][hr]

[hexola]

54. Jeeze - I think she seems totally honest in the video...

I think something else is going on here...

[randome]

57. I can't watch the video at work so I can't say I have all the evidence available.

I'm just guessing, nothing more than that.
[hr][font color="blue"][center]There is nothing you can't do if you put your mind to it.
Nothing.[/center][/font][hr]

[warrior1]

65. But the customer signed the $93.55 amount receipt

That is clear.

[geek_sabre]

71. whoever wrote the note signed that copy of the merchant receipt

it is not the same handwriting as the customer copy. It even appears to be written with a different pen.

Even so, the credit card statement agrees with the customer copy. So the possibilities are:
- they stiffed her, and in retaliation she wrote in a tip anyway (fraud - customer's a dick, but she stole)
- they tipped her, and for some reason she decided to lie anyway for attention/money (fraud - customer's innocent, she's a dick)
- they tipped her, and a coworker/manager wrote the note, and pocketed her tip (customer/waitress innocent, dick tbd)

The fact that the restaurant refuses to turn over the original copy or their records suggests either they knew she was lying already, or they're guilty as sin.

[hexola]

72. Customer seemed to remember the amount of the tip...

I favor scenario #3...

In the video - she seems honest to me...and furthermore - the customers seem like the last people to express this kind of hate.

[davidpdx]

136. The more I think about it I agree 3 is a possiblity

As I said above, if it is true then it is a scam against multiple people.

[cali]

74. how is that clear?

[Sunlei]

67. this server caused a lot of damage to this business

Plus there is no reason for any server to take a picture of customer receipts in the first place.

[hexola]

68. So why are the business owners blaming the customers...?

They accused the customer of making it up...

[Sunlei]

70. some business owners do and say stupid things. Now the person can sue the business instead of serve

server.

[hrmjustin]

69. Shame on her if she lied.

[Hosnon]

79. I really hope she is innocent in all this...

Otherwise, she's just another "backwards 'B'" numbskull.

The fight is real folks, no need to make it up.

[abelenkpe]

94. I never write on my customer copy.

Just tuck it away to reconcile online later. Is that normal?

[hexola]

100. I ALWAYS write the tip part on my customer copy - the tip part wont show up in your bank charge...

...until a few days later...which gets confusing!!!

[JimDandy]

112. So why does the $111.55 show up in ONE transaction on the customer's credit card statement?

But both receipts (merchant and customer) have only $93.55 printed on them next to the date near what is probably the customer's blurred out/blacked-out credit card number. If the tip and the total were run as two transactions, shouldn't there have been a separate merchant receipt with a separate credit card transaction number for the tip? That would explain how the waitress got hold of a merchant receipt showing the food total but no tip, but doesn't explain why there is only one transaction on the customer's card statement.

[LisaL]

124. Haven't you gone to a restaurant? It always shows as one transaction.

I have no clue how it's done, but that how it shows.

[Mojo Electro]

152. They just put a hold on the card.

They put a hold on the card for the amount of the bill, but only later when they settle the transactions do they add the tip in and then charge the total amount. Your card has not been charged yet when they bring the receipt back to you, they've just run it to see if you have enough on the card.

That's why sometimes you can't use those pre-paid cards or Visa gift cards and such in restaurants. Or if you can, you have to have like at least 130% of the bill (or whatever the chosen number is) available on it.

It's so they don't get stiffed on the tip.

If you have 100 dollar Visa gift card lets say, and you run up a bill of $98, the bill would go though, and then you could write in a $20 tip on the receipt and when they tried to charge it, the card would decline.

Most regular debit cards will just overdraw your account if you do that, so the restaurant still gets paid.

[MADem]

102. I might not always write in the tip, but I'll put the total so I know what to expect on a statement.

Usually I put both, but sometimes just the total.

[Jesus Malverde]

103. The original Facebook post

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=453425841430201&set=a.192270474212407.34793.192269477545840&type=1&comment_id=2624150&offset=0&total_comments=1208

[FrodosPet]

139. WOW! It is obviously a different handwriting from signature to slur

Photoshop strikes again!

[SaltyBro]

105. Reading on Have a Gay Day Facebook page

that Ms. Morales allegedly faked having cancer not too long ago. She may just be a run-of-the-mill con artist.

[davidpdx]

137. Link please?

This brings in new accusations and would be interesting to see how creditable they are. I'm not familiar with the publication.

It always helps to provide a link!

Welcome to DU!

[LisaL]

150. Here.

"Morales has been caught in multiple lies, telling co-workers she shaved her head because she had brain cancer and later telling them it was her friend who had brain cancer, her colleagues and friends said."

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2013/11/26/waitress-no-tip-hoax/3761565/

[kristopher]

113. Might be a case of theft from the server by someone at the restaurant nt

[AverageJoe90]

115. Why do I get the feeling that.....

these people are either lying or tried to cover up after the fact. NEVER trust a bigot 100%, ladies and gentlemen.....verify first, and thoroughly.

[LisaL]

123. Yea, lets trust your feeling for no apparent reason.

Considering these people didn't have to come forward at all if they had anything to cover up.
WTF would they?

[hexola]

147. In the video - the customers said they didn't vote for Christie...

because he doesn't support gay marriage...hardly the bigot type IMO.

[AverageJoe90]

157. No, let's be skeptical for good reason, until we can positively solve this mystery.

WTF would they?

While it's not common, some bigots these days will go to absurd lengths to hide their true feelings.

[davidpdx]

138. After reading through this and seeing the updated story I'm still conflicted

Some brought up the possibility of a third person being involved. I think the theory could be possible.

I don't know much anymore about printing CC receipts because I've been out of the retail industry (or any industry having to do with credit cards) for over a decade since I live overseas. I'm sure the technology has changed quite a bit.

It sounds like the TV station is bringing in a handwriting expert and checking the customer's bill. If those are inconclusive, it may put pressure on the restaurant to release the records.

[Politicalboi]

140. Did the waitress have a

Backwards "B" on her face.

[bitchkitty]

151. It looks like this woman has problems.

http://www.lohud.com/article/20131126/NEWS/311260034/Waitress-tip-tale-former-Stony-Point-resident-lies-about-everything-former-co-workers-friends-say

Morales told people she was a former Marine who was sent to Afghanistan and that everyone in her platoon died in an explosion except her, Larkin and Howat said.

but...

A spokesman for the Marines, Major Shawn Haney, said in an email that Morales had served in the U.S. Marine Corps Reserve from July 13, 2009, to May 21, 2013 at the rank of Lance Corporal, E-3, as an administrative specialist. She was assigned to the Marine Air Group 49, 4th Marine Air Wing out of Newburgh and deployed from April to June 2012 to Romania as part of the Black Sea Rotational Force 11.

“There is no indication of combat service in Iraq or Afghanistan,” he added in a follow-up email.

She also lied about having brain cancer and hurricane damage to her home.

This woman evidently has issues.

[MADem]

154. Oh dear, she does seem to be a bit of a fabulist..

But Morales has been caught in multiple lies, telling co-workers she shaved her head because she had brain cancer and later telling them it was her friend who had brain cancer, her colleagues and friends said.

They said she also told co-workers at a day care center where she once worked that Superstorm Sandy severely damaged her home in Stony Point, and sent a boat into her living room. Concerned co-workers dropped by her home and found only minor damage to the carpet by her front door and no sign of a boat, they said.

“Every story she comes up with has a lie,” said Julie Howat, 23, of Pomona....High school acquaintances and former colleagues of Morales said the revelations confirmed their suspicions about Morales’ original story. In the past, Morales has sought sympathy from friends and co-workers through questionable stories, Howat said.

“Any tragedy that happened, she had to be a part of it,” Howat said. “She needed sympathy and empathy.”

But this case has enraged Howat because people from all over the world were sending Morales money after hearing the story...

http://www.lohud.com/article/20131126/NEWS/311260034/Waitress-tip-tale-former-Stony-Point-resident-lies-about-everything-former-co-workers-friends-say?nclick_check=1

Not looking good at all for the server at this stage.

[bitchkitty]

155. Her actions

in this case are a slap in the face to people who really do experience discrimination. And lying about being in combat never goes over well with veterans or their families.

If this ends up in front of a judge, I hope he/she orders Ms. Morales to get therapy.

[MADem]

156. Yes. And there is something deeply wrong going on, there.

Apparently - if we believe the reports, and it's looking like we have no reason to not believe them - she's been doing this sort of thing for many years, now, since her school days. She does need help; not sure if that kind of thing can be fixed, though.

[randome]

158. OTOH, it shows that gays are no different from the rest of us.

That's important to keep in mind, too.
[hr][font color="blue"][center]Stop looking for heroes. BE one.[/center][/font][hr]

[bitchkitty]

160. Update

Server Dayna Morales has been suspended by her Bridgewater restaurant employers pending completion of their investigation of allegations that she falsified a story about a customer leaving her an anti-gay message in lieu of a tip.

"Ms. Morales is currently not on our employee schedule while we are still working to complete our investigation," the Gallop Asian Bistro restaurant posted on its Facebook page.

http://nj1015.com/dayna-morales-suspended-from-bridgewater-restaurant/

[Dr. Strange]

161. Another update

Wounded Warriors: No record of donation from waitress who said she got anti-gay note

After the story of a lesbian, ex-Marine waitress who claimed she was left an anti-gay note in place of a tip caught worldwide attention, she promised she'd donate the replacement "tips" she started receiving from supporters to the Wounded Warrior Project.

But the organization, which supports injured service members, couldn't verify it had yet received any donations from Dayna Morales, who has been off the schedule at Gallop Asian Bistro since a couple claimed the note was a fake, Patch reports.

http://www.nj.com/somerset/index.ssf/2013/12/gay_waitress_donations_marines_service_questioned_as_investigation_continues.html

I don't get this comment from the article:

"We're still waiting for the owners to finish their investigation," Byron Lapola, restaurant manager, told NJ.com this week. "It's pretty complex, so until then we're restraining comment."

What exactly is complex? How hard is it to check the charges from that night and see if it was 93.55 or 111.55?