Welcome to Florida. We can explain the state we're in (we think)

[Zorro]

You must be so excited to move away from ice scrapers, seasonal affective disorder and studio apartments only billionaires can afford. Welcome to the friendliest place on earth!

We know moving can be disorienting. So here’s a brochure clarifying a few positions often demonized by the mainstream media. (Not the most profitable mainstream media of all, of course. Fox News gets it right.)

First off: Glad you could join us! You’ll find we have all kinds of people. In fact, we’ve welcomed vast hordes of refugees. (The blond ones with Slavic cheekbones, that is. The brown ones we shipped coatless to a Massachusetts island.)

The most important thing to know: In Florida, we respect life. We’ll fight for your right to life. From 6 weeks in utero, to age … well, whenever the death penalty gets ya.

Here, respecting life means access. (Not access to medical care — we’re kinda launching an inquisition-style review of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.) Florida respects life … with assault weapons.

https://www.tampabay.com/opinion/2023/05/04/welcome-florida-we-can-explain-we-think-column/

[RKP5637]

1. Florida, where millions go to die, regardless of age. n/t

[apcalc]

2. I owned a condo in Florida.

Before DeSantis. Really couldn’t wait to sell it and get out of that hot, buggy, rainy hell hole. Truly, I did not like it.

So happy I got out. Especially glad, now that I’m watching the book banning, anti LGBTQ, anti-trans governor.

[scarletlib]

5. The travel brochures & publications never mention the bugs love Florida as much as people do.

Last edited Fri May 5, 2023, 08:49 AM - Edit history (1)

[Timeflyer]

3. It's so free and not-woke here that we scream with joy at each new dick move DeSadist makes.

How much more free and not-woke can we stand?

[apcalc]

4. 😂