Have you ever gone so long without sex that you...

[NightWatcher]

put on flip flops and ran around in your yard with the sprinkler on, just to remember what it sounds like?

[Deb]

1. You must have fallen and got hurt too, didn't ya?

[brewens]

2. Is that you Foxworthy? n/t

[crazytown]

3. If you ever need urgent medical attention

tell that to the cops.

[ProudLib72]

4. With Animal Planet on in the background?

Why, yes...

[csziggy]

6. The question I have for you is

You ONLY put on flip flops?

Now I need eye bleach!

[wasupaloopa]

8. So I was at the nude beach yesterday with my wife. The weather was perfect. Blue sky, blue sea,

soft sand and warm sun.

There were young women and young men and old women and old men. Everyone got along well. Not a bottle of eye bleach in site, just sun screen..


Just beautiful naked people being a part of nature as god intended.

[csziggy]

9. I guess if the people who chose to be there are all in agreement, no problem

But few would want to see me with all my scars nude and I would not be comfortable in that environment.

[defacto7]

10. If god had meant for people to go naked he wouldn't have invented naughty bits.

[zanana1]

14. Don't you mean "dangly bits"? nt

[Generic Brad]

7. It's been so long for me that I'm a virgin again

The statute of limitations has expired.

[UTUSN]

11. EWwww, gross!1

[Comatose Sphagetti]

12. I'm at that stage of life

when the wife offers me sex or ice cream I reply,
"What kind of ice cream?"

[MLAA]

13. Made me smile! But next time try saying both!

[Major Nikon]

15. More like getting your boot stuck in the mud

Don't ask how I know.

[Aristus]

16. I once went seventeen years without sex.

Childhood and adolescence were rough...