Shouldn't I be spewing by now? A psychological question.

[Bertha Venation]

My life has been ruled by food, and I'm morbidly obese. Overeating has been a coping mechanism for me. I'm told by two trusted psychiatrist/psychologists that I eat to suppress painful things and emotions, and I can see it. I also eat as an answer to a bad day, an unpleasant happening within my family, etc.

I've been on a Medifast diet since May 6 and have lost 14 pounds. I've had four slips; otherwise I am sticking to it. I'm not losing weight as fast as I'd hoped (11 lbs the first week I attribute largely to water), but at least I'm losing.

Here's my question. If I eat in order to suppress my emotions, shouldn't I be spewing emotions like a volcano by now? I'm not, and it puzzles me.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

1. I doubt that a month, or even longer, on a diet will suddenly change

a lifelong pattern of the way a person deals with food vs. emotions. If you have always coped with personal problems by eating, that's a well-established habit in your life that you may have to change through counseling as you lose weight, and in order to stay on the diet. 14 lbs. in a month is really quite a lot - you really don't want to lose it faster than that, too-rapid weight loss isn't good for you. But congratulations on your success so far. That's awesome.

[OriginalGeek]

2. Hi BV

My wife started on her Medifast a week and a half ago and I often tell her about your experiences that I read here. She has slipped a couple times too but is clamping down on it and has been faithful to the program for the last several days and she's down about 8 pounds so far.

lol, I've tasted a few of her items and all I can say is you both have more gumption than I do - Or, at least, y'all are way more motivated than I.

I just wanted you to know that from all the way across the country, just from typing on a message board, telling us of your dieting adventure is helping another person get through hers (Lol, she had the box of food for a week before she started in earnest - and only after asking "Have you heard anything new about how Bertha is doing?&quot .

I think it comforts her to know there is someone else out there who is experiencing kind of the same thing. Her friend that told her about it was never overweight - she just thought she was a little too chubby and, frankly, I think she's too skinny now but that could be personal bias and it's none of my business anyway.

But none of this answers your question. I don't have any answer to that. I'd just say if the diet is working for you and keeps some of those other troubles out of your mind (or at least manageable) then that has to be a good thing right?

All I can say is thank you for sharing. Whether you wanted to or meant to or not, you're making my personal life better because my wife is overweight and she needed the push to get started dieting and you were part of that push. Most likely I'll end up doing some kind of diet too...my eating habits are already changing because of hers and we both needed it.

I hope someday I can return the favor and help make your life a little better.

[Chan790]

3. Have you perhaps exchanged mechanisms?

It's not uncommon actually to see people who simultaneously take up diets and exercise programs exchange one coping mechanism or _____-trigger for another.

The most common of these is exercise because it provides the same neurological-high as eating does...where before you would have coped by eating, now you cope by going for a walk; where before you felt triggered to eat, now you feel triggered to hit the treadmill or weights. New triggers generate more endorphins than old triggers...part of the reason people fall off exercise programs and diets is because the increase does not last if it is not kept up long enough to become habitual in its' own right: usually in excess of 90 days.

[HappyMe]

4. I don't really have any answers to your questions.

I'm no doctor, nor did I stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.

Just dropping in to give you support. If you have a couple slips, don't beat yourself up for that. You are in this for a long haul, you're only human.
Take care of yourself. Keep at it. Slow & steady weight loss may be the healthiest.

Congrats on your weight loss.

[applegrove]

5. I read somewhere that people eat to feel better, but in the end eating bad food doesn't make you

feel better, it makes you feel worse. Perhaps that is what is going on. I know I tested it out this week and sure enough, a little bit after I've stuffed my face I don't feel so good. Plus I'm ashamed. I know I'm going to keep that in mind when I start my diet - tomorrow.

14 pounds is great Bertha. Keep it up. You are doing great.

[MrsBrady]

6. I would watch out for several things...

switching addictions would be one....

Also, things can come out "sideways"...if you are not able to practice your normal addiction...
I'd also take a look at the few slips you've had...it's good that you got back on the wagon...but
if you did slip, it's a sign that you still need to work on "feeling" through the feeling and dealing with reality in front of you...

Also, a month might not be long enough to have things come out sideways...
You might be so focused on sticking to the medifast, that it could be come your substitute avoidance behavior.

We are all a work in progress. I'd talk to your therapist about it.

[Demoiselle]

7. it sounds to me you're taking charge of your body...

11 pounds in a week is great...And so what if it's mostly water! Our fat cells hold more water than our lean cells, or so I've been told...so a loss is a loss, water or not.
I've also been told that a slow loss is better than a fast one. It sounds to me like you're doing all the right things, so don't be discouraged if your rate of loss slows.
I'm pulling for you!

[DoBotherMe]

8. Recovering alcoholic here

My addictive personality led me to obsessive use of alcohol, speed, downers, exercise, worry, nagging, criticism, that led to a breakdown at 50, after which I was diagnosed with OCD. I had frightening intrusive thoughts that seemed logical to me even though to everyone else they were crazy. All those years before I knew the cause of my behavior, shrinks were in the picture (but my GP diagnosed me). What helped me get through the worst of changing the obsessive behavior was journaling my thoughts and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy ... although I did find out that I hated my mother (LOL). Al-anon and AA helped as well, I met so many people who were struggling with their demons but we had a lot of fun! Dana ; )