Post the punch line of a joke and see if anyone knows what joke it's from without using Google

[red dog 1]

I'll start things off with this one:

"Whatever you do, don't sell that cow!"

[50 Shades Of Blue]

1. "Snowballs."

[blockhead]

44. What's the difference betwwen a snowman and a snowwoman?

[50 Shades Of Blue]

46. ....

[TheCowsCameHome]

2. Sorry, we're NFS.

[Harker]

3. "I didn't know you could yodel."

[red dog 1]

8. I think that's from a Knock-Knock joke

"Knock Knock"

"Who's there?"

"Yodel-lay-he"

"Yodel-lay-he who?"

"I didn't know you could yodel"

[Harker]

11. Yer little old lady...

is the version that I heard about 55 years ago. Heh.

[applegrove]

29. "Little old lady" is what i heard growing up.

[red dog 1]

70. I think you're right....I think it was "little old lady"

[tblue37]

4. Shut up, you! I'm a talking to your father! nt

[OilemFirchen]

5. "Even the great Caruso had to clear his throat from time to time."

[Croney]

6. "And you're gonna need it."

[Brother Buzz]

9. ''That's all you do? Bird imitations?''

[nolabear]

24. Hawkeye! 😍

[Brother Buzz]

26. Yes!

[mopinko]

10. and he tapped his temple, and said- see, kidneys.

[El Supremo]

206. I know that one but it mocks fun of the disabled.

[mopinko]

208. honestly, i would have to reconstruct it to tell it. it was just an inside joke in the family

forever.

[unblock]

12. "The aristocrats!"

[nolabear]

25. I feel so dirty. 😂😂😂

[pnwest]

103. Beat me to it!

[PJMcK]

152. You need Drew Carey's finger snaps! (n/t)

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

172. Or Gilbert Gottfried's Comedy Central's Roast of Hugh Hefner

[unblock]

13. "No! I'm a frayed knot!"

[OilemFirchen]

23. Hey!

Didn't I tell you we don't serve string?

[jayfish]

14. "...in the service, one must always choose the lesser or two weevils"

[TomSlick]

81. Joke from Master and Commander

Lucky jack to his doctor friend upon seeing weevils in the hard tack. Lucky Jack asked the doctor to choose between the two. The doctor chose the slightly larger one.

Upon delivery of the punch line by Lucky Jack, the doctor said "He that would tell a pun would pick a pocket."

[jayfish]

93. Nailed It!

Love that movie.

[jayfish]

15. "Thanks. I've been feeling a little flat!"

[Harker]

40. What did the tire say

to the air pump?

[jayfish]

42. Nice try.

That was a pretty logical answer though. Did you come up with it yourself?

Hint: It's from an 80's comedy.

[Harker]

43. Thought I had it.

Yep, it came naturally.

Back to the drawing board.

[jmowreader]

117. I think it was "do I look okay?"

I know it was the Newly Deceased office scene in Beetlejuice...one of the clerks was there because he’d been run over by a truck and squashed flat. He asked the Maitlands if he looked okay. She said he did, and got back Jayfish’s line.

[jayfish]

142. Correct!

[First Speaker]

16. "Don't believe a word that lying sheep says"

[JimGinPA]

155. I Heard It About A Ventriloquist Visiting An Indian Reservation

[Doc_Technical]

17. Go ahead, they're your cows.

[Doc_Technical]

153. A man was showing his farm to a woman he had reciently met.

As they walked around the barn, they saw two cows mating.
The guy started raising his eyebrows and was grinning and he said,
"Boy. I'd sure would like to be doing that!"
And the woman replied,

[underpants]

202. Nice,

[Doc_Technical]

18. Yeah, except this one is eating my popcorn!

[red dog 1]

47. From Men in Black?

[Marthe48]

61. My Mom told me this one

when I was a teenager

[red dog 1]

71. In one scene from "Men in Black" Tommy Lee Jones said those exact words and then laughed.

The scene was where he and Will Smith are at a restaurant together and Tommy Lee is filmed while apparently telling the end of the joke.
(Will Smith didn't laugh).

My guess is that it's an old joke.

Do you remember the entire joke?

[Marthe48]

82. Yes I think so

My Mom's version, kinda dusty: A man had just bought a goose and brought it with him to the theater. The usher said he couldn't bring the duck in, so the guy hid the duck under his coat and got in. The theater was dark and crowded. As he sat down next to two old ladies, the movie was coming on. The man loosened his coat so the goose could breathe. When the movie was over, he hurried out. The ladies were walking to their car and one of them said, "Harriett, have you ever seen a man's private parts?" And Harriett said, "Why yes, Mary, I have. Why?" "The man beside me loosened his clothes and it came out." "Oh my, Harriett! But surely you've seen a man's private parts. Why are you so upset?" "Because this one was eating my popcorn!"

AN updated version: A man goes to the movie theatre with his duck. The ticket agent looks at the man and then at the duck, which is on a leash. The ticket agent states that the duck is not permitted in the theatre. The man explains that the duck is his service pet. However, because he didn’t have his service pet certification on him, the duck wasn’t allowed in.

The man then goes to the side of the theatre and stuffs the duck down the front of his pants. With no duck to be seen, the ticket agent allows the man in. The theatre was packed and the man ends up sitting next to two old ladies.

About twenty minutes into the movie the duck was getting uncomfortable and hot so the man unzips his pants to let the duck breath. The duck sticks out his head and starts looking around. One old lady nudges the other lady and exclaims, “Hey, this guy next to me just unzipped his pants.” The lady furthest away says, “Once you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all”. The other lady replies, “Yes, that’s what I thought, but this one’s eating my popcorn”.

[red dog 1]

86. Hilarious!

:

[jmowreader]

118. It was a rooster, not a duck

Another name for a rooster is a “cock,” which leads us to the joke...

Farmer Brown had a prize rooster. One day he decided to take it to the movies, so he stuck it in his pants and headed to town. He sat down and unzipped his pants to let the rooster breathe.

A few minutes later Gladys and Agnes sit down next to Farmer Brown.

A few minutes after that, Gladys gave a scream.

“Gladys, what’s wrong?”

“Farmer Brown’s cock is sticking out of his pants.”

“Come now, Gladys. You’ve seen a cock before. Just ignore it.”

“I can’t. This one is eating my popcorn.”

[underpants]

204. Duck is funnier than rooster

Thank you , let me start there.

Anything with a D P or T makes is funnier. Ducks are funny because it's an imaginary world of something everyone is familiar with.

[underpants]

203. Nice !

[TomSlick]

19. "Some people just can't tell a joke."

[OilemFirchen]

22. ...

62.



28.

[TomSlick]

51. DING, DING, DING. We have a winner.

[Marthe48]

62. My husband told me this one

when we were dating-almost 50 years ago. Still one of my favorites

[TomSlick]

65. I'm afraid that your husband and I are about the same age.

Fortunately for both of us, our sweethearts laughed at our jokes. More fortunately for both of us, our sweethearts from fifty years ago stayed with us.

Thank you for reminding me how lucky I am.

[Marthe48]

66. You are lucky

My husband passed about 2 1/3 yrs. ago. Every morning when we woke up, he would say something funny, just to make me laugh. I still come across things he wrote and I smile.

I personally think humor is one of the top characteristics I look for in people. Cheers!

[TomSlick]

77. I'm sorry.

Your husband was a lucky man. To spend his life with a someone who loved him enough to laugh at his jokes was a great blessing.

Heaven was a step down for him.

[Marthe48]

83. Aw you are so nice

We loved egging each other on. I am getting back to making jokes again. After a bad one, my son-in-law will say things like "ladies and Gentlemen! She'll be here all week! Be sure to tip your waiters!" Makes me laugh.

[LompocDem]

20. This not James River...

toilet paper. It John Wayne toilet paper. It rough, it tough and take no shit from Indian!

[benld74]

21. Who's that guy standing next to Dave?

[PoindexterOglethorpe]

101. I'd have to Google to get the full joke, which isn't allowed.

But can I say who the guy standing next to Dave is?












































The Pope.

[benld74]

107. That's right !!

[tonekat]

144. I heard it with "Moishe" instead of "Dave" N/T

[emmaverybo]

27. (Singing) "Your mother's dead."

[catrose]

127. Something about a telegram being delivered

And the recipient wants a singing telegram, has always wanted one. After some arguing (because the deliverer doesn't think it's appropriate), he sings: <your post>.

[emmaverybo]

128. Very good! Long, long joke--must be drawn out. Doorbell ringing and ringing. Guy in shower, but door

bell keeps ringing. He’s screaming I’m coming #$&%, and slipping, falling, breaking things and self, towel ripping to get to door.
(Take 5 minutes to tell, acting out the pratfalls) and FINALLY.

Flings door open, little guy says “I have a telegram for Mr. X,” and he grabs deliverer by collar, throttling him, and shouts “Ya better sing it!!”

Then you do the ”Your mother’s dead” in Terrible throat squeezed sing-song.

Amazing guess.

[trof]

179. Not quite. Here ya go:

Guy says "I've NEVER had a singing telegram. PLEASE sing it to me."
"Well...OK..."Charlie your mom is dead, we know she died in bed..."

[emmaverybo]

184. Different versions. My version told to my by an Irish story-teller type who drew it out. I was

caught by surprise. Not that moms passing are funny.

[Captain Zero]

30. No. Let's walk down there and fuck them all.

..

[red dog 1]

48. An old bull and a young bull are standing on a hillside, looking down at a bunch of cows

The young bull says; "Hey, Pop, Let's run down there and fuck one of those cows!"

The old bull says: "No. Let's walk down there and fuck em' all!"

[red dog 1]

69. Upon reflection, I think the old bull said: "No, son..We'll walk down there and fuck 'em all!"

[Marthe48]

209. Old bull was standing in the pasture on a cold winter's day

and decided to go to the barn and slip into a nice warm Jersey.

[LAS14]

220. My mother in law to be told me that 5 minutes after I met her for the first time. nt

[Marthe48]

221. Lol

Hope it was the beginning of a beautiful friendship!

[LAS14]

222. It was, it was. nt

[Turbineguy]

31. Change

comes from within.

[backtoblue]

125. What does a Buddhist Coke machine say?

[underpants]

205. Oh that's funny

[sorcrow]

32. That's just the frost in my moustache. n/t

[kozar]

33. and the 4th man ducked! n/t

[Harker]

36. Three guys walked into a bar... n/t

[kozar]

38. Winner winner, chicken dinner!!!!

[Harker]

39. I'll just have soup and a salad, please.

[Harker]

34. "Make me one with everything."

[red dog 1]

49. What did the Zen monk say to the hot dog vender?

[Harker]

54. Ding!

Felt good to give you one back, Red.

[red dog 1]

73. Thanks for that

[Paladin]

35. "Come on, Chickenshit. They won't believe you, either."

One of my beloved Uncle Wally's very best ones.

[Harker]

37. "It was easy...

once I cut my way out of the burlap bag."

[DeeNice]

41. "But first, a little ruru"

probably NSFW

[DiverDave]

45. A stick

Bada boom





What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?

[Ron Obvious]

87. Or, what's long and hard and sticky?

Straight from Jr. High, that one.

[red dog 1]

50. "The price is right, but the name is Daisy"

Last edited Fri Sep 20, 2019, 08:30 PM - Edit history (1)

(Redd Foxx joke)

[SaveOurDemocracy]

52. "Big enough to fit a camel"

[WhiteTara]

53. Break is over, back on your heads.

[Harker]

55. Is feces involved in a

high temperature environment?

[WhiteTara]

56. Bingo! Indeed it does!

3rd room in Hell.

[Harker]

57. That goes way back.

offers a newcomer a choice of three eternal situations, the obvious choice being the third option- standing around knee deep in shite. Then comes the punchline.

This recitation highlights my lack of comedic talent.

[WhiteTara]

58. Mine too.

It was my mother's favorite and I used it (the punchline - they didn't get it and I had to tell the whole joke) today with the guys working with me outside.

[Harker]

59. "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

[PoindexterOglethorpe]

102. A priest and a rabbi and an imam walk into a bar.

[Harker]

104. I always try to squeeze in

a Zen monk, but that's just me.

I squeezed in a phone booth once, but that's another story.

[Harker]

60. "Because he was Haydn."

This is the punchline to what is generally considered to be my magnum opus.

[red dog 1]

75. Reminds me of a joke from the movie "Prairie Home Companion"

Dusty and Lefty are telling "bad jokes" and Lefty told a joke about his horse.

(From memory, so might not be exactly right)

LEFTY
"My horse is very smart..He knows algebra and trigonometry, but I just can't teach him philosophy."

DUSTY
"Why not?"

LEFTY
"Well, you can't put Descartes before the horse"

[Harker]

80. There's a keeper... n/t

[Marthe48]

63. My Dad had a little spiral notebook

had over 500 punchlines written down. He owned a grocery store and always had friends stop by. They'd trade jokes, along with local news and such. I was usually banned from the meet department where they hung out, but my brothers would tell me the jokes they got to hear

[red dog 1]

72. Do you remember any of them?

[Marthe48]

84. Let me think about it

He wasn't politically correct, and I think a lot of them were naughty. We had a place in the country and he left it there between visits. When we were there again, mice had chewed on it. It was like losing a treasure. I'll see what a good night's sleep does and see if I can remember any.

[Marthe48]

64. No lady, I'm riding Princeton in the 5th

One of my Dad's favorites

[ailsagirl]

67. I first heard that in the film Bonnie & Clyde!

[red dog 1]

68. Yes, it's an old joke, but it was told in "Bonnie & Clyde"

[BigmanPigman]

207. That is the only time I ever heard this joke.

I heard it 3 more times, but it was in the same movie...they were all sick of it.

[red dog 1]

74. "Well, the sex is the same, but the dishes are stacking up."

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

115. Oly says to his friend : "Oh, I think my wife has died."

His friend replies:
"What do you mean, you THINK she died?"

Oly replies:
"Well, the sex is the same, but the dishes are piling up!"

[discntnt_irny_srcsm]

76. [Whispered] Hey Donnie, how many's a brazilian?

[discntnt_irny_srcsm]

94. Okay here's some help: spoken by GWB during a briefing on the Iraq war n/t

[Bongo Prophet]

78. That dog will bite you!

[C_U_L8R]

79. And that was the last anyone heard from Donald Trump

[red dog 1]

85. "That's not my dog!"

[Brother Buzz]

88. Crazy Guggenheim?

...before I painted it yellow and cut off its tail...it was an alligator.

[red dog 1]

90. "Hi, Joe...Hi, Mr. Dennehy!"

[trof]

180. And then he sang.

[Harker]

89. Does your dog bite?

I think of Clouseau...

[red dog 1]

91. That's it!

(The Pink Panther)

[red dog 1]

92. "How are you, Senator Cruz?"

[red dog 1]

95. "Seventy five cents"

[Alpeduez21]

96. A cup of coffee and two popsicles

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

97. "Walk him and pitch to the rhino."

[Doc_Technical]

98. What do you do with a giraffe with three balls?

[red dog 1]

99. "Wait and see which can they go in"

[red dog 1]

100. "Arrr, I know, and it's driving me nuts!"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

168. A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's wheel coming out of his pants..

Bartender says:
"Hey, did you know you have a ship's wheel coming out of your pants?

[red dog 1]

235. You got it!

(Old joke)

[Bayard]

105. It keeps me from licking my lips.....

[trof]

181. You recommend chickenshit for chapped lips?

[lpbk2713]

106. The O'Malley twins are just drunk again.

...

[red dog 1]

108. "KNOW IT, I WROTE IT!"

[davsand]

109. Back on your heads, coffee break is over!

It's obscure and one of mt favorite jokes ever.


Laura

[red dog 1]

110. "O.J. Simpson"

[red dog 1]

111. "But The Juice will kill you"

[red dog 1]

112. Well, if she doesn't like the slippers, she can go fuck herself!"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

116. A rich man and a poor man had the same wedding anniversary date; and they would meet each other

at the mall once a year and show each other what anniversary presents they got for their wives.

One year, they met at the mall, and the poor guy asked the rich guy:

"What did you get your wife this year?"


The rich guy replied:
"I got her a diamond necklace and Mercedes Benz"


The poor guy asked:
"Why did you get her a diamond necklace AND a Mercedes Benz?"


The rich guy replied:
"Well, if she doesn't like the necklace, she can return it in the Mercedes Benz"


Then the rich guy asked:

"What did you get your wife this year?"


The poor guy replied:

"I got her a pair of slippers and a doldo"


The rich guy asked:

"Why did you get her a [air of slippers and a dildo?"


The poor guy replied:
"Well, if she doesn't like the slippers, she can go fuck herself!"

[red dog 1]

123. Excellent!

Welcome to DU!

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

151. Wasn't that a joke told on The Sopranos?

[red dog 1]

231. Yeah, that's where I heard it.

[red dog 1]

113. "The Aristocrats!"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

149. Isn't that the punch line from "The Aristocrats" joke?

I've seen the movie...it's very funny, especially Gilbert Gottfried

[red dog 1]

238. It is!

Gilbert is hilarious in that movie!

[red dog 1]

114. "All I want is toilet papah'"

[Major Nikon]

119. Looks like you blew a seal. No way, vanilla ice cream!

[rzemanfl]

177. See my post below. I didn't realize the thread was old and long.

There is video of this joke being told by a chimp somewhere on the Internet. It supports the ice cream ending.

[red dog 1]

237. "This thread is so old and long___________"?

[rzemanfl]

239. That I posted the same punch line to it twice. n/t

[red dog 1]

240. lol

[Disaffected]

120. "Ward, weren't you a little hard on the beaver last night?

[red dog 1]

121. Lol

[Disaffected]

124. OK, you probably know but:

Q: What is the dirtiest line ever uttered on family TV?

The show was "Leave it to Beaver".

[red dog 1]

132. So Beaver's mom actually uttered that line?

[Disaffected]

133. Yup,

more than once I understand it(it was a dumb ass but popular sitcom so didn't watch it much myself).

BTW, his actual nickname on the show was The Beaver which makes it even better.

[red dog 1]

134. That's right!

His nickname was The Beaver...(and I did watch the show)

[red dog 1]

122. "And deep too!"

[JimGinPA]

154. Two Guys Peeing On A Bridge

One smiles and says, "Man this water is cold" and the other says, "Yeah, and deep too!"

[red dog 1]

162. You got it!

I heard that joke in "Slingblade"

[trof]

182. I heard "Yeah, but it ain't that deep."

[red dog 1]

233. That line must be from a different joke.

"Yeah, and it's deep too!" is definitely the line from the "Slingblade" joke
(I've seen it so many times I have it memorized)

[regnaD kciN]

126. "I used to say 'fuck you' all the time, now I just smile and say 'how nice'..."

[eppur_se_muova]

130. Well, she had been to finishing school ....

(It's a great joke, best told w/appropriate regional British accents -- the class consciousness is part of the joke -- but I don't remember the whole thing. )

[musette_sf]

129. "Your mother's on the roof and we can't get her down."

[red dog 1]

131. "I don't know, but it sure can pick a shitload of lettuce!"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

141. What do you get when you cross a Mexican with an octopus?

[red dog 1]

234. You got it!

You must be a Sopranos fan too!

[red dog 1]

135. "Now, where's that old lady with the abscessed tooth?"

[red dog 1]

136. He's smiling now; but wait 'til they take the pacifier out of his ass"

[red dog 1]

137. You're as close as you can get!

[red dog 1]

138. "You'll get your palm red for free."

[red dog 1]

139. "Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."

[red dog 1]

140. "Yeah, and it's deep too!"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

143. "I never said it was free!"

[tonekat]

145. "Hey Lady, your sign fell down!"

[red dog 1]

146. "You can unscrew a light bulb"

[JimGinPA]

160. What's The Difference Between A Virgin & A Light Bulb?

[red dog 1]

230. Close, but no cigar

[red dog 1]

147. "A rooster clucks defiant"

[JimGinPA]

156. Whats The Difference Between A Rooster & A Lawyer?

[red dog 1]

161. Did you see that joke on the "Do you have a favorite 'lawyer' joke? thread?

(I posted it at the top)

[JimGinPA]

164. No, I Was A Bartender When I Was Younger

I heard millions of jokes & I found if I just remembered the punchlines I could work backwards & never forget them.

[red dog 1]

166. Yeah, old jokes are the best.

[red dog 1]

236. Yessiree!

[red dog 1]

148. "She seemed surprised"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

150. Nice to see you again, Senator Cruz!"

[JimGinPA]

157. "Whenever I Got A Dozen I Sold Them"

[JimGinPA]

158. "I Thought So Too, 'Till I Ran Out Of Chain"

[JimGinPA]

159. Shake Hands

[red dog 1]

163. "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."

[red dog 1]

165. "Next time don't drive so fast..You nearly killed us!"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

169. "The Juice will kill ya'"

[red dog 1]

170. "They both look good hanging from a tree"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

171. "I told them I was President Trump's driver and that I killed the pig!"

[red dog 1]

173. "Give me my quarterback!"

[red dog 1]

174. "If you two are going to keep arguing, I'm leaving!"

[lpbk2713]

175. He wouldn't eat the mushrooms.

...

[rzemanfl]

176. The late and much missed Annette Apollo (Old Leftie Lawyer, Tangerine LaBamba)

argued over this punch line. She said it was, "That's just a little mayonnaise." I maintained it was, "That's just a little ice cream."

[Permanut]

178. And he was the first person ever to wire ahead for a reservation.

[trof]

183. I dunno, but they're saving the seeds.

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

185. "Because I'm trying to examine you"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

186. Oral sex makes your day and Anal sex makes your whole week.

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

187. "Are they afraid someone will clean them?"

[red dog 1]

188. "Best piece of ass I ever had!"

[red dog 1]

189. "Do they come in blue?"

[Whiskeytide]

190. Wrecked 'em Hell. It kilt 'em both! (Little Johnny joke)

[red dog 1]

199. I know that one

Last edited Fri Nov 29, 2019, 08:16 PM - Edit history (1)

Little Johnny came home crying and told his mother "a car hit my dog in the ass"

His mother replied, "You mean rectum!"

"Wrecked him,, it nearly killed him!"

(Old joke, with different versions)

[The Polack MSgt]

191. Wow, I can only imagine...

I had tennis elbow once and it hurt like hell

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

192. "George W. Bush, come on in!"

[red dog 1]

193. "Brooklyn..There's hundreds of 'em"

[Brother Buzz]

194. Naw, it just doesn't take long to look at a horseshoe

[red dog 1]

195. "Ok, fine..but first 'The Aristocrats!'"

(Who told that joke in the film "The Aristocrats"?)

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

197. "Dress her up as an alter boy"

[red dog 1]

198. "Now, where's that old lady with the abscessed tooth?"

[red dog 1]

200. "He's quiet now, but wait 'til we take the pacifier out of his ass"

[underpants]

201. WTF?

Hint: it's a snail joke

[red dog 1]

210. "Swimming pool?..Is this 486-5731?"

[red dog 1]

211. Because they don't want to be Scene"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

212. "Because I don't like drunken fools"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

213. "The Prince of Wales"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

214. They charged one - and let the other one off

[csziggy]

215. Transporting underage gulls across sedate lions for immortal porpoises

Hint - this is one of the worst pun jokes of all times.

[red dog 1]

216. "The price is right, but the name is Daisy"

[red dog 1]

217. "Are you a narc?"

[red dog 1]

218. "Yes, and the portions are so small."

[LAS14]

219. Beige, I think I'll paint the ceiling beige.

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

223. "All I want is toilet papah"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

224. "One is a hollow cylinder, and the other is a silly Hollander."

[BlueTsunami2018]

226. "That ain't my finger either"

😃

[rzemanfl]

228. Nah, that's just a little ice cream.

Although the late, fondly remembered Annette Appollo (Old Leftie Lawyer, Tangerine LaBamba to DU) favored the tartar sauce version.

[TlalocW]

229. No, you don't understand. Chunks is my dog!

TlalocW

[red dog 1]

232. "Why the long face?"

[red dog 1]

241. "See, you forgot me already!"

[red dog 1]

242. "Did you say steak?"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

243. One is a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean.

[red dog 1]

244. "Trump? I thought you said rump!"

[red dog 1]

245. I didn't say 'small" I said 'smell'!

[red dog 1]

246. Yeah, but the Juice will kill 'ya

[red dog 1]

247. "Shit Shanty Irish!"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

248. "Maybe I should have started with the circumcision"

[red dog 1]

249. "Sit? I thought you said 'shit'!"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

250. "She's out back, slopping the hogs!"

[red dog 1]

251. "Didn't you see the sign out front?"

[red dog 1]

252. "I'll take the soup!"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

253. The Czech's in the male"

[red dog 1]

254. "Look at those jugs!"

[red dog 1]

255. "If that's all you got, then go suck a moose!"

[red dog 1]

256. "If you two are going to keep arguing, I'm leaving!"

[MatthewHatesTrump2]

257. "The Prince of Wales!"

[red dog 1]

258. "It WAS his mama!"

[red dog 1]

259. "He must have been a Republican!"

[red dog 1]

260. "The second guy died!"

[red dog 1]

261. God shrugs, "I didn't recognize you."

[red dog 1]

262. "I can't," says the poodle, "I'm not allowed on the couch."

[red dog 1]

263. "One is assaulting with intent to kill, the other is killing with intent to salt."

[red dog 1]

264. "They each got six months."

[red dog 1]

265. "I ordered ribs, not bibs!"

[red dog 1]

266. A key.

[red dog 1]

267. "The 'J' is silent."